Angels in My Hair

by Lorna Byrne

  'Joe, please don't be cross,' I said. 'I cannot cope with you being cross just now. Just support me and comfort me. The young man will be found, please God soon.'

  Joe held me in his arms and I must have fallen asleep, because when I woke later I was still in the chair by the fire, with a blanket around me. The children were all in bed; Joe smiled at me then got up and made me a cup of tea.

  Sitting by the fire, with a cup of tea in my hand, I said to Joe, 'You must not get cross like that again, Joe. I need you to support and comfort me. And I particularly need your support when God and the angels allow me to share with you the supernatural things that God allows to happen in my life. Joe, I need your help, especially when I'm exhausted.'

  Joe gave me a hug and kiss. Holding hands in front of the fire, we prayed together for the young man's spirit, that he would be found soon, that he would be free and that I would be free too. Joe knelt down in front of my chair and put his hands on each side of my face, saying, 'If God asked me to do the things that you do, I would have to say no, because I would not have the courage, or strength, or your strong faith.'

  Family life went on as normal and then, it happened – all of a sudden I was free. Don't ask me what day it was or what time it was, because I don't know, but suddenly I felt normal; I felt human again. I was so delighted, I was jumping for joy. I knew that the boy's body must have been found. I ran to tell Joe. 'He's been found! I know they have found his body, because he's gone from me.' I praised and thanked God while dancing around the cottage. Joe gave me a hug and later that day we went down to the church and lit a candle, and I thanked God for Peter's spirit being freed to go to God.

  God had allowed Peter's spirit to stay here in this world until his body was found, and I was used as a connection between the supernatural and the physical world. Without that connection, I believe he would never have been found. The connection had been made years before, in my sister's little house in the centre of Dublin, long before anything happened to him.

  Miracles happen all the time, and when they do, the usual flow of cause and effect does not matter – sometimes the miracle is put in place years before. This was a miracle that God and the angels made sure would happen in advance. I know Peter's guardian angel, and the guardian angels of those involved in his death, must have worked hard to stop this young, innocent life being taken in a wrongful act of revenge, but the men who killed Peter did not listen to their angels, which made me feel so sad.

  Peter was a very beautiful spirit, and when his body was found and his spirit had gone to Heaven, he did something I did not expect him to do. He sent his sister to tell me.

  A few days after I felt him leave me, Sally arrived at the house. It was as if she had been running; she seemed very excited and jittery and said she felt the need to let us know that her brother's body had been found, that it had been in the canal, under a shelf in the bank of the canal, and that his hands had been tied together with rope.

  It was only then that I realised that this beautiful spirit was in fact Sally's brother, the boy with whom I had made eye contact all those years before.

  Sally was sad, but happy now that the search was over, and that they could now lay him to rest.When I looked into Sally's face, as she stood before me telling me all of this, I saw Peter's spirit. He had sent his sister to us with urgency, unknown to her, so that she could tell us that he had been found. It was Peter's way of thanking me: she was a spiritual messenger between Peter and I. To this day, Sally has never come to visit me again.

  Chapter Twenty

  The golden chain

  One cold winter's morning, Joe was back from the night shift but hadn't yet gone to bed. He told the children that they were going to give their mum some time off; that he was going to take them down to the canal to see the ducks. I never saw the two boys and their little sister, Ruth, get ready so quickly; they put on their coats and hats and off they went.

  No sooner had they gone than I got a flash of a vision of my parents. I saw them standing together in conversation and there seemed to be a strong breeze blowing around them. It was as if they were standing together but my Da wasn't really there – he looked like a spirit. As quickly as it appeared, the vision was gone. I knew I was being told that Da's life was coming to an end. It was like a bolt of lightning hitting me.

  I cried. I gave out to God and the angels, because I loved my father. It was as if only a few minutes had passed before Joe and the children came back through the hall door. The children were all excited, telling me about what they had seen down by the canal. As I made some tea, Joe said, 'What's wrong? You look very pale and you've been crying.'

  'I had a vision,' I told Joe, 'my Da is going to die!'

  'Maybe you misunderstood,' Joe said. 'What did the angels say?'

  'They said nothing. I just saw the vision and I gave out to God and the angels,' I said. 'I was too upset to understand what they were saying, and then you and the children came home. It was as if you were only gone a few minutes.'

  Joe gave me a hug and I felt a little bit better. I tried to put the vision to the back of my mind. I would have liked to have gone and seen my father there and then, but I couldn't. I had three young children to mind and we had no car. Fortunately, the following day Da came to visit. I was delighted to see him, but I couldn't tell him why.

  Often I am able to see illness in a person's body: sometimes bones will flash and I will see them, or sometimes the heart might come forward in someone's chest, or sometimes I will see an organ with a dark shadow around it. I looked hard at Da but I couldn't see anything wrong, which confused me a little.

  A few weeks later, the weather had improved and I went for a walk down to the Maynooth College grounds while Joe looked after the children. Walking through the apple orchard and the groves of trees, I gave praise and thanks to God. I was enjoying my walk, feeling the breeze – that cold fresh air – on my face. Seeing the birds and the squirrels, all of these creatures made me smile; I was seeing them not only in the ordinary way, but also seeing the light of the energy around them.

  I said hello to the people that I passed – a priest and another with a baby in a pram. Suddenly, the Angel Michael stepped into stride beside me. He put his hand on my shoulder and then he touched my hand. Immediately, I was filled with peace. 'Thank you, Michael,' I said, 'that makes me feel good.'

  Michael was walking beside me in human form. As usual he was tall with dark hair, but this time his hair looked short. He was dressed in a black suit and black coat and could easily have been mistaken for a priest. I looked up at him and smiled, saying, 'I admire your priest-like appearance!'

  He gave himself a little shiver and turned up the collar on his jacket. 'How does this look?' he said. We both laughed.

  A few priests passed by, with prayer books in their hands, and said hello; Michael nodded his head in acknowledgement. I smile now as I recollect a neighbour, whom I didn't know well, saying that she had seen me out walking again with my friend. I knew I never walked with anyone other than my family – it was the Angel Michael she had been seeing. (I can think of three occasions when people have said to me that they had seen me out walking with someone, when I knew I was alone, and I realised they had seen me with an angel in human form. It's possible that this has also occurred more frequently but I haven't realised it.)

  Angel Michael said, 'Let's stand under that big oak tree for a few minutes, while there is no one around, and I will explain to you the vision about your father.'

  'Michael, before you say anything,' I said, 'I want you to know I am cross.'

  Michael laughed at me, saying, 'Lorna, you are such a character.'

  'Sometimes,' I said, 'I think God and all you angels forget I am human. Why do I have to know about my father's death? Michael, I would rather not know!'

  Michael looked at me with sadness in his eyes, held my hand and said, 'Your father needs you to help him pass over.'

  I took a deep breath. 'I love my da.'

/>   Angel Michael said, 'Let's walk for a little while.' Still holding my hand as we walked, he continued, 'Remember the vision you had of your da the day Joe brought the children down to the canal? That was the time that God connected your da's soul and yours – joining them together. Your souls have been intertwined, Lorna. In a few days it will start: you will see your da's life from the moment he was conceived; it will be like a television screen in front of your eyes and in your mind, continuous every day. When it stops, you will feel the sudden shock of your da's soul breaking away from your soul as he leaves his human body to be taken by the angels to God.'

  I walked beside Michael and cried my heart out.

  'Lorna, let me wipe away those tears.' As Angel Michael raised his two hands to my eyes I realised that we were not walking; we were standing in a circle of light. Sobbing, between words and gulps of breath I said, 'This is really going to be hard.'

  'Lorna, remember God and we angels will help you,' Angel Michael said to me, as he again slipped his hand into my pocket and touched mine. 'I will walk to the end of the path with you, and then I must go.'

  We walked in silence; it was only a short distance and I could feel Michael giving me strength. Then he squeezed my hand and was gone. I walked on home and never told Joe about my meeting with the Angel Michael.

  Within a few days, as Michael had foretold, my da's life started to roll in front of my eyes and in my mind. It was constantly there – sometimes very rapid, sometimes slow – but never ceasing. I saw the scenes over and over again. I saw Da as a little child playing with another child in the mud, looking skinny and scrawny sitting at a school desk, as a young man with jet black hair sitting by a riverbank with a good-looking young woman who I knew was Mum, Da mending bicycles in the dark shop in Old Kilmainham, the despair on Da's face when the little house we lived in collapsed, the loneliness as he took the boat to England to get work . . .

  Da now started to visit us more often, sometimes even early in the morning. He would say he just wanted to call in for a cup of tea or a little chat and stay for a few minutes. I wanted to tell my Da what I knew, but how could I? You cannot tell someone that you know that they are going to leave this world; that your souls are connected in order to help them pass over. That would be too frightening. We have not evolved spiritually enough yet.

  Da was coming to know God now; he had grown so much, spiritually, in recent years. I always remember my father saying to me some years before, 'Why did it take me so long to find God?' He had become fascinated with Him and it was wonderful to see my da's soul growing. Da had begun his journey to God, his transition from the human world to the spiritual world. This is a journey we all have to take, regardless of our religion or belief in God. For some of us this journey will be short; for others it can be much longer – years, or even a lifetime.

  On one of Da's visits he invited us, as a family, to go to the born-again Christian family prayer group the following Sunday morning in Dublin. Joe and I said okay together and Da said he would collect us.

  Later that day I went for a walk down along the canal banks. The children ran ahead to play so I had a little time to myself with the angels. I said, 'Hello angels' and laughed as they tickled me, pulled my hair and filled me with tingles. I asked the angels if they could tell me why it had taken so long for us to go to this group. It had been several years since that day at my mother's house when the preacher from the born-again Christian prayer group in Dublin had suggested to Mum that she bring us along some Sunday.

  The angels spoke to me in one voice: 'Remember, Lorna, you're sharing something very spiritual with your da – the partnership between your souls. Your da feels within himself the need for you to share this prayer group with him. Now is the right time.'

  Owen called, 'Mommy!' and in a flash of light the angels disappeared.

  The two boys were standing together, smiling, as I walked up to them and Ruth was asleep in the buggy. I knew by the expressions on their faces that they had seen something.

  'Don't say anything,' I said.

  'I won't,' replied Christopher.

  We had fun that day, we fed the ducks and then we headed home.

  On Sunday morning, Da and Mum arrived at the cottage at about a quarter to twelve and we all got into the car. Sitting in the back of the car on our journey into Dublin, I found it heartrending watching my da; all of the time I could see golden light surrounding him.

  I remember the church – it was big, more like a cathedral – but I don't really remember very much else about what the place looked like. There were a lot of families there and children running about and food was being served. I felt very light; I could feel the angels carrying me and it was as if I were in a trance; as if I was on the outside looking in. I watched Da walk over to me saying, 'come, the prayer meeting is about to start.'

  Da walked ahead of me and sat in the second row from the front, with an empty seat beside him. I know he meant me to follow him, but the angels had other plans. About three rows back, a man moved in a seat and invited me to sit down beside him, which I did. This chair was about one foot out, not in line with the other rows of chairs and I could see my Da clearly.

  The meeting began with a prayer and then everyone started to sing hymns. Da stood up in front of his chair, like everyone else and, as he did so, in that moment I knew this was what I was to share with my da – to see him in prayer. I could feel the power of the angels all around me.

  I don't know how I can describe what started to materialise in front of my eyes, it was something so beautiful and so pure. I could no longer hear the people singing. Da started getting brighter and brighter, until he glowed a golden colour and became more and more radiant. My da's human body was standing there at the front of the church, and levitating about three feet above him was his guardian angel.

  I saw Da's soul rise out of his body. I was amazed to see it: I have seen other souls appear in this way before, but this was my father. Da's soul was in the shape of his human body; it was made of light and it was as if it was wrapped in capes of golden light. It rose upwards, accompanied by his guardian angel, and grew, becoming an enormous presence of bright light about four times the size of a person. It was shimmering and moving gently all the time.

  Then Da's soul turned and faced me from afar, smiling love down on me. I could feel this love. It was then that I saw what looked to me like a golden chain dangling from my da's soul, which entered my father's head from above and then encased his whole human body. To my surprise, I saw another part of this golden chain coming from my father's physical body and slowly moving through the air towards me. As the angels bowed my head, I could see how this golden chain entered my body, in the centre of my chest, connecting Da's soul with mine.

  The angels lifted my head and I watched Da's soul descending carefully and entering his body. Normally, a person's soul is fully within the area of the body, but Da's soul did not re-enter his body fully; it stayed partially out, partially above his head, for the short period of his life that remained. I could see Da's soul had great love for the human parts of my da's life; great compassion.

  Someone tapped me on the shoulder from behind and asked if I could sit down. It was only then that I realised I was still standing and everyone else was sitting, including my da. I was starting to feel human again and I took a deep breath. All of a sudden, I felt the touch of all my angels. Silently, I thanked them. I was sad, but yet I was full of joy.

  It always amazes me when God and the angels tell me that someone is going to start their transition from this life, through death and to what we humans sometimes call the supernatural world. I may be told about someone who I may have met casually years ago, or only heard of through someone else, or maybe a person who is well known in the world.

  To see how another human being changes their life and their beliefs makes me smile. We never seem to realise when this is happening, that we have begun the journey of rebirth. I always remember my da asking why did it take so lo
ng to get to know God.

  One morning in March, after leaving the boys at school, I was walking home with Ruth in the buggy when I turned towards the gate of the cottage and who did I see but the Angel Michael sitting on the doorstep. I was delighted and called out as I opened the gate, 'Angel Michael, you're gleaming like the sun.' No sooner had I said those words than Michael was by my side.

  'Hello, Lorna,' he said.

  Ruth started to awaken and Michael put his finger to his lips with a radiant smile. He touched Ruth on the cheek with the tips of his fingers on his right hand and beams of light came out, her eyes started to close slowly and she fell back asleep. When Michael moved his hand away, I could see my baby's energy and Michael's intertwined and then, breaking away gently, Angel Michael said, 'Lorna, you know it's getting closer to the time for your father to leave this world.'

  'Yes, Michael, I know,' I said. 'When I saw you on the doorstep I was delighted to see you, but I was sad, too, because I knew in my heart why you had come this time.'

  I looked over at Ruth as she continued to sleep. Michael laughed, 'She won't wake up until I leave. 'Michael reached out and took my hand and I started to cry. He gave my hand a little squeeze and I looked up at him. Michael was radiant; I saw his beautiful radiant light enveloping and protecting me. A wave of tranquillity came over me.

  Michael said, 'Lorna, let the love you have for your da help you now. Over the next two weeks, your souls will separate slowly and gently; that golden chain coming from your Da's soul and connecting to yours is becoming weaker and will eventually break.'

  I was still crying but I was also listening carefully to Angel Michael's words.

  'Michael, it has begun to weaken already, I can feel it.'

  'Lorna, you must understand,' Michael said, 'that when the time comes for the final break you must not try to hold on.'