Do Shinpads Come in Pink?

by Helena Pielichaty

  Without another word, I turned and marched off. I didn’t even stop at the car. I just kept going down the drive and out onto the road. In fact, I had almost reached the end of the village before Gemma’s dad pulled his car up alongside me. “OK, speedy Gonzales. Hop in.” He laughed.

  In the car, Gemma did her best to calm me down but I was too worked up to listen. “It’s all right for you,” I said. “Megan thinks you walk on water. I’m just the one who tags along and gets insulted every week.”

  “Amy that’s not true.”

  But it was true and we both knew it.

  4

  Later that Day …

  when I’d had time to calm down a teeny-tiny bit (but not that much) …

  Came … THE DATE

  “OK. How do I look? Marks out of ten?” Mum revolved slowly on her high heels and splayed the pleats of her dress so I could see the snazzy netting of her underskirt underneath.

  “Ten.”

  “You’re sure? What about the polka-dot scarf? Or the patent belt? Too much?”

  “Mum, you look gorge.”

  “Aw, thanks, babe. What about you? What are you going to wear?”

  “Hello!” I said, holding my hands out to show I was ready.

  She looked surprised that I was still in my blue cut-offs and the white puff-sleeved top I’d had on all day, but we were running late so that saved me having to explain why I hadn’t felt like getting changed.

  Still, despite running late we weren’t as late as Shane. When we arrived at Miro’s he was nowhere to be seen. Way to make a first impression! Carlos, his brown, bald head shining with perspiration, greeted us like he always does with effusive pecks on both cheeks. “Debbie! Amy! Cóma está usted? How are you? Long time no see.”

  “We’re good, thanks. We’re good,” Mum replied, as I waved at Rosa, who waved back and blew a kiss at me.

  Carlos showed us to our usual table, holding out the chair for Mum. “Now, what can I get you? The early-bird menu has finished but for my special guests I make exception.”

  “Can you give us a minute, babe? We’re waiting for someone,” Mum told him.

  “Shane,” I said. “And he’s late.”

  Carlos tutted. “Late? For you? Inexcusable. I will spit in his soup!” He took our drinks order and went away chuckling.

  Mum asked how I’d got on at the club but I just said, “Fine.”

  “You don’t sound fine.”

  I took a deep breath. “Well,” I began, but her eyes were fixed somewhere over my shoulder and I knew the moment had gone.

  “Oh, here’s Shane…” she cooed and I turned to see this guy walking towards us. There were two immediate minuses added to the one for being late – the slate-grey capri shorts and the harassed look on his face. “Debs, I’m so sorry…”

  OK, make that three minuses. Mum is Debbie.

  “No worries,” she said. “We’ve been chatting away.”

  He looked at me and smiled apologetically. “Amy! Hey!” He held out his hand for me to shake.

  “Hi,” I said.

  “Aren’t you going to sit down?” Mum asked, batting her eyelashes.

  “I’d love to but … um … bit of a domestic.”

  Uh-oh, I thought. This has got to be an ex-issue.

  As it turned out it wasn’t his ex-issue it was his sister Kay’s ex-issue. Her ex-husband hadn’t turned up to collect their son, Shane’s thirteen-year-old nephew, Ashley. “… And Kay’s had this thing in London booked for months, so I said I’d look after him. I’m so sorry…” His voice petered out.

  “Where is he now?” Mum asked.

  “In the car, refusing to budge. It’s the second time this month his dad’s let him down and he’s pretty cut up about it. I think it’s best if I just head home. I’m sorry.” He turned to me. “Maybe some other time, huh? I need serious words with you about Debs’s taste in music…” This from the guy in capri pants –but I took his point.

  I glanced across at Mum. She looked so crestfallen and Shane did seem quite a nice guy.

  “Shall I go and talk to Ashley?” I offered.

  “I don’t know. He’s in a bit of a mood,” Shane said.

  “Let her try,” Mum told him. “They’ve got a lot in common. Amy’s got a deadbeat dad too.”

  “Mum!”

  “Well, it’s true.”

  “You are so embarrassing.”

  But it was Shane, not Mum, who looked embarrassed. “I’d better head off. I’ll call you later, Debs.” He kissed Mum on the cheek and left.

  Mum watched him go, sighing heavily. It looked like neither of us was having a good day.

  5

  What Happens in the Gazebo Stays in the Gazebo

  An Amy Minter Confidential

  Have you heard that song “I don’t like Mondays”? Well, I so agree with whoever wrote it. I don’t like Mondays either. Mondays mean Miss Sturgeon all day and she does my head in. Then it’s two more hours of after-school club and that does my head in too. Having to trail from my school, St Mary’s, all the way across town to Mowborough Primary to get to it doesn’t help. Worst of all, when we do get there there’s nothing to do – unless you love PlayDoh.

  That’s why Operation Present 4 Hannah and Katie has been such a blast. I’ve loved coming up with all the ideas and filling in spreadsheets and stuff. It’s given me a sense of purpose. I don’t mean just at after-school club but on the team, too. It felt like what I was doing counted for something for once. So when Megan threw it all back in my face on Saturday I was gutted because it meant my time on the committee was over. I was resigning the second I walked through that after-school-club door at four o’clock.

  “Oh, don’t be like that,” Gemma pleaded as we stepped down from the minibus.

  “Like what?”

  “In a hump. I’m sure Megan didn’t mean to upset you.”

  “Oh, please. She hates me.”

  “She does not hate you. She just takes football really, really seriously.”

  “So do I.”

  “No offence but since when?”

  “What about that time I played in the pouring rain with no thought whatsoever for how frizzy my hair would get?”

  “Amy, you came on carrying an umbrella.”

  “So?”

  Gemma grinned and leapt up the clubhouse steps. “Idiot.”

  “Name-calling is so bad for my self-esteem. I’ve got a good mind to…” “Report you” I was going to say until I spotted Megan and Petra standing by Mrs Rose’s desk. I frowned. What were they doing here?

  Eve was with them, talking for Britain as usual. “You’ve got visitors. Isn’t that nice?” Mrs Rose, the supervisor, announced when she saw me staring.

  I ignored her and turned to Eve. “Where’s Holly?”

  “Gazebo.”

  Without another word, I headed outside, not even stopping to check if Gemma was following. She could look after our visitors if she wanted to. I felt no such obligation.

  In the gazebo, Holly hitched up so I could sit next to her. “Have you seen Megan and Petra?” she asked.

  “Unfortunately.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I’ll tell you later. What’s new?”

  “Well…” she began but wasn’t given a chance to finish.

  “Budge up, dudes,” Eve ordered as she ushered Petra and Megan into the shelter. Gemma sat down last, squashing in between me and Holly.

  I admit I had been intending to blank Megan for the duration but she did something so unexpected I had to change my mind. She apologized. “I was out of order on Saturday, Amy. I’m really sorry. It’s just that when you said you wanted to give Hannah and Katie a big send-off, it sounded like you thought I didn’t.”

  “Oh no,” I said. “That wasn’t what I meant at all.”

  “I know. I guess I’m not used to you being the one on the team that organizes things. No offence.”

  “None taken.” My shoulders relaxed and the an
ger that had built up since Saturday seeped away. Megan had apologized. For the first time ever.

  “You’ll still get the Jump-leads, won’t you?” Petra asked.

  “Can’t,” Eve told her. “They backed out. I was going to tell you all today…”

  “No probs. We’ll find something else. I have a thousand options,” I said, feeling all happy and bouncy and project manager-y again. Me? Resign? No way José.

  I plunged into my bag for the minute book, where we recorded everything for the presentation evening. Now we were all chummy again it seemed only fair to share what we’d planned so far. Unfortunately, I have the world’s biggest school bag and couldn’t find the book anywhere among my piles of stuff. “OK, talk among yourselves, people. Organization fail…”

  Holly filled in. “What kind of music shall we go for? A party’s not a party without music.”

  “And a chocolate fountain. That’s a must,” Eve added.

  “Found it!” I said, pulling out the green ledger and flicking through the pages. “OK, here goes…” I began then stopped. There was a deathly hush. All eyes were fixed on Megan, whose head was now bowed.

  “Are we saying grace?” I asked but Gemma shot me a warning look. Then, out of nowhere – well, out of Megan actually – came the most horrendous sobs.

  The sobs became louder and louder even as Petra wrapped her arm round her best friend’s shoulder. “I shouldn’t have mentioned the dancing.” She sighed.

  “Why not?”

  “Because it just rubs it in, doesn’t it?”

  “Rubs what in?”

  “Look. It’s all right for you lot. The presentation evening’s like a big jolly party but for those of us left behind it’s the end.”

  “Why is it the end?” Gemma whispered, addressing Megan’s mop of curly hair. “I know it’s hard to say goodbye to Hannah and Katie but you’ve got a new coach lined up, haven’t you? I thought Sian was taking over? From the seniors? So it’s only the end for us, not you.”

  Megan’s head shot up; her face glistening with tears. “But without you it is the end for us, you dweeb!”

  The look of astonishment on Gemma’s face was classic. “Me?”

  “Of course you! You’re awesome! You and Eve both are. There’ll never be another pair who link up so brilliantly, will there? There’ll never be another Dream Team. Or another midfielder with Nika’s quick thinking or another two as brave as Holly and Lucy at the back. You’re all unique. You’re all so ace…” Megan’s face crumpled again and then, without another word, she jumped up from the bench and hurried off.

  “What she’s trying to say is she’ll miss you guys as much as she’ll miss Han and Katie. She thinks the new team’s going to be rubbish without you in it. We all do,” Petra told us, her eyes full of tears too as she raced off after Megan.

  There was a long pause.

  “Well, I didn’t see that one coming!” Eve said.

  6

  Find Out What Amy Does for the First Time EVER!!

  An Amy Minter Exclusive!

  “You all right, babe?” Mum said later that evening.

  We were sitting on the sofa watching TV, waiting for our nail varnish to dry.

  “Of course I’m all right. Why?”

  “You’ve been so quiet all evening.”

  “Oh, just some stuff on my mind.”

  “Don’t tell me. The presentation evening.”

  “How’d you guess?”

  “I wish you’d put as much effort into your homework as you have that thing. You’d be top of the class. What is it? Still not decided about the presents?”

  “Something like that.”

  Actually, it wasn’t what to buy Hannah and Katie that was on my mind. It wasn’t Megan’s super-size waterworks, either, show-stopping as those were. It was her listing everyone’s qualities that I couldn’t get out of my head. What had I got as an accolade? Nothing. Not even best hair bobbles.

  This time I knew she hadn’t left me out to be spiteful. Whatever our history, Megan was always fair when it came to bigging up her team-mates. So why hadn’t she bigged me up? Maybe she’d just forgotten to big me up in the heat of the moment? And when Petra had said Megan would miss us, I had a sneaky suspicion “us” hadn’t included me.

  “Back in a mo’,” I said to Mum now.

  “All right, sweetie. Don’t scuff your varnish now.”

  “I won’t.”

  In my bedroom I booted up my laptop and did something I’d never done before. I typed “Parrs ladies football” into Yahoo. Seconds later there we were on our very own website. I homed in on the Under 11s team shot. How funky did I look in my pink scrunchie and matching pendant? Get in! But me looking stylish wasn’t what I was searching for this time.

  I worked my way through the photo gallery. Tabinda’s dad always took loads of pics during matches. Having said that, the only photo I could find with me in it, other than the team shot, was at the last Hixton Lees match. I was standing on the touchline next to Holly and the caption beneath, written by Katie, read: Amy asking Hols, “Do shinpads come in pink?” Typical Amy!!!

  I smiled but it wasn’t exactly what I was looking for. I tried the match reports next; there was hardly anything about me in there, either. I got a mention in the cup final but I had to scroll back to a year last December for a feeble “Way to go, Minto.”

  I closed the website down feeling shocked. I hadn’t exactly shone at the game, had I? No wonder Megan hadn’t included me in her hall of fame.

  I told myself I didn’t care. Football had never been my thing and I’d never pretended it had. So what if Megan and the others didn’t rate me? Hannah had always said it’s the taking part that matters and I’d taken part whatever those reports or photos showed.

  But as I returned to the living room I realized I did care. I wanted to be remembered as more than Gemma’s ditzy friend. I wanted what everyone else had. A football legacy. I wanted to be a proper Parr.

  And that was the biggest shock of all.

  7

  “How Can We Help?”

  An Amy Minter Friendship Dilemma

  It turned out I wasn’t the only one who’d spent the evening agonizing over Megan’s outburst. It was the first thing Gemma brought up at after-school club the next day. “You know, it never occurred to me that they’ll miss us as much as they’ll miss Hannah and Katie.”

  “Well, they’re bound to; we’re legends,” Eve pointed out.

  “Why don’t we do something special just for them at the presentation evening? We could sing a song maybe? I don’t mean just the four of us – I mean Lucy and Nika too. All the leavers,” Holly said.

  I gasped out loud. Give that girl a gold star and matching earrings! What an opportunity! Not singing – forget dumb old singing. Let’s get back to basics. “Or we could have an actual match. Six inside. Leavers versus Stayers,” I said, all excited.

  “You mean six a side?” Gemma asked.

  “Whatever.” I could see it now. I’d score a hat-trick, then drop back in defence and be brave there, and head for the middle and do a few tackle things. “Amy, that was outstanding,” Megan would gush. Meanwhile, Mum could video the whole thing for posterity. Sorted.

  But Eve had other ideas. “Nah. Too complicated. We’d have to bring a change of clothes and everything. A song’s best. I’ll talk to Lucy and Nika at school tomorrow. Where will we rehearse, though? They won’t be able to come here. They do other stuff straight from school. We could meet up at my house on Saturdays? Nika only lives a couple of streets away and you lot can get lifts. Right?”

  I was going to ask Eve who’d died and made her Committee Queen but Gemma and Holly immediately agreed with her! So rude! I was well miffed they hadn’t even considered my match idea. When I broached it later with Gemma she just laughed and said she thought I’d been kidding. That was just what I needed – another sign of how beneath their radar my opinions were when it came to football.

  8

&
nbsp; RELATIONSHIPS: When MUMS Fall IN Lurve

  – the Telltale Signs

  Mum was late picking me up. That meant I was last to leave and Mrs Rose was not a happy bunny. Nor was I. The presentation evening was turning into one big stress-fest. Singing wasn’t what I’d signed up for. Using up my Saturdays wasn’t what I’d signed up for. Feeling like a freak wasn’t what I’d signed up for. “Would it kill you to be on time for once?” I sighed as Mum led the way back to the car.

  “Sorry, honeybun. Got caught up in things.”

  “The tanning booth, by any chance?”

  She was very orange.

  “I needed a top-up. Shane’s coming for supper tomorrow and I don’t want him to see me all pasty-looking now, do I?”

  “Tomorrow? Midweek? Why?”

  “Why not?”

  “Because I’m not in the mood.”

  “Tough.”

  “Tough to you, too.”

  “Where are you going?” Mum asked as I opened the back car door instead of the front.

  “Well, I don’t want spray stuff rubbing off on me, do I?” Unfortunately the back seat still had the boxes of T-shirts hogging it. I groaned. “Haven’t you got rid of these yet?”

  “What’s it look like?”

  “It looks like I’m going to be sitting with Mrs Tantastic.”

  She laughed as I slammed the back door shut and slid in beside her. We drove in silence for a minute and then she said, “By the way, I meant to ask you what you thought of Shane? You know – the other night.”

  I shrugged. “He wasn’t awful, apart from calling you Debs.”

  “That’s it? That’s the only fault you could find?”

  “Give me a chance. I only saw him for two minutes.”

  “I’m going to. Why do you think he’s coming to supper tomorrow?”

  Hmm. This had “set up” written all over it. I glanced at her. To my amazement, colour was spreading all along her cheeks and up the whole of her neck. At first I thought it was the Fake Bake still fake-baking but then I realized she was proper blushing. “Mum?”