Crush. Candy. Corpse.

by Sylvia McNicoll

  Before bed, my mother and I sip a cup of herbal tea that’s supposed to make you sleep. My mother hugs me for a long time. She loves me, likes me too, no matter what. I think knowing that helps me sleep best of all.

  chapter twenty-three

  The next day Mom is late from her doctor’s appointment. As I check the door of the courtroom, I try to make a bargain with a God I don’t even believe in. Trade you my not guilty verdict for a no cancer diagnosis. If Mom is cancer free it won’t matter if I have to go away for a little while. I watch my classmates drift in. Mr. Brooks finds a seat. Donovan next and Alexis, then Gillian Halliday from the residence. Where is Mom? Has she already been admitted to hospital?

  The judge calls for order several times and threatens to clear the room before everyone finally settles down. Then he looks toward my lawyer.

  “Attorney for the defence?” the judge says. Michael McCann stands up.

  “Members of the jury, Your Honour, Crown Counsel, all teenagers do not lie, steal, or break the law. Some of them like seniors, some of them enjoy volunteering with old people. Some of them respect their parents and teachers, do their homework and chores. We’ve heard that Sonja is one of those kinds of young people.

  “We’ve also heard how difficult the death of her own grandmother was to her. How hard she took the news of her mother’s bout with cancer. This is a young person who values life in both the young and the old.

  “On February 14 of last year, Sonja Ehret walked into Mrs. Demers’s room. The two overheard the news of Cole’s accident. Whether Mrs. Demers understood or not, she did something unusual. She requested a candy. On a normal day she couldn’t speak anymore. Perhaps she was having one of her ‘good days.’ Sonja unwrapped it and gave it to her. Then, upset as she was over Cole, she left.

  “Witnesses for the Crown testify that Sonja Ehret breaks rules. She didn’t break a rule that day entering the room alone. She was no longer there as a student volunteer.

  “Did she break a rule giving Helen Demers a candy? Perhaps. But Cole had been giving Helen candies every visit. Should she be expected to think that it could cause fatal harm to Helen? I don’t believe so.

  “What happened then? There is a possibility that in this better state that Mrs. Demers was in, this small temporary reprise from her condition, she could have reached over, unwrapped another two candies, and popped them in her mouth.

  “Or perhaps, as Sunny suggested, one of the other patients came in and helped her ingest more candy.

  “The good state ended and she began to choke. If the Crown could prove that Sonja heard this choking and did not return to assist her or call someone else, this would be an unlawful act. Unfortunately, no one noticed in time to help Mrs. Demers. We’ve already heard how busy Paradise Manor could get sometimes.

  “Even if you believe that the afternoon might have played out the way the Crown has suggested, you must find Sonja Ehret not guilty. If you think Sunny probably or likely fed Mrs. Demers candy till she choked and then denied her any assistance, you must still find Sunny not guilty. As the judge told you in his instructions at the beginning of the trial, ‘maybe,’ ‘likely,’ even ‘probably’ is not good enough. Sunny is innocent unless the Crown Counsel has convinced you beyond any reasonable doubt that she committed this crime. One thing that is certain to me, and it should be evident to the court, is that Sonja Ehret did not kill Helen Demers. Alzheimer’s disease killed Helen Demers. And you cannot hold anyone accountable for this unfortunate disease. Thank you.”

  I feel a hand on my shoulder and turn to see Mom has arrived. She smiles and whispers in my ear. “Everything is good.”

  A smile cracks my face open wide and I breathe out a long sigh as I squeeze her hand on my shoulder. Nothing else will matter.

  “Will the Crown Counsel present his summation now,” the judge commands.

  The buzzard’s eyes blink in a near twitch. He looks towards me and back to the judge. Finally he stands up, clears his throat, and begins.

  “In this country we do not believe in euthanasia, nor do we believe that patients can choose to end their own lives. This is in our law.

  “We have this law so that the weak and the helpless and, yes, the feebleminded, are protected.

  “We have heard from several witnesses that Sonja Ehret broke regulations when it suited her. When Sonja came that extra day, she told us that the regular rules did not apply.

  “Yes, Sonja Ehret liked old people. She wanted them to have choices. When Helen Demers wanted pink hair, Sonja gave her pink hair. She wanted sweets, Cole and Sonja gave them to her.

  “She asked for death and her grandson Cole couldn’t give it to her because he obeyed rules. But Sonja Ehret did not.

  “She claims she only gave Helen Demers a single butterscotch but she also admitted that she doesn’t always tell the truth. She lied about the sewer explosion, she lied to sneak around with a forbidden boyfriend. Members of the jury, she’s lying about that single candy.

  “The coroner’s report states clearly that three candies were lodged in Helen Demers’s throat. It also confirms the time of death to be five-forty. Sonja left at five-thirty. Beyond any reasonable doubt, she was the last person to see Helen Demers alive.

  “On February 14. Cole’s near-fatal accident convinced her that Helen Demers should die. We know Sonja took first-aid courses and understood how to perform the Heimlich manoeuvre. Sonja gave Mrs. Demers candies until she choked, then refused assistance to her. She didn’t call anyone to help Helen Demers. Sonja walked away. The candy caused the choking, but Sonja denying her medical assistance was an unlawful act, one that a reasonable person could foresee causing serious harm.

  “Yes, Sonja liked old people and bought them things and wanted only to please them. This was not a murder for money or personal gain. This was a misguided effort to help a senior.

  “But it is manslaughter nonetheless. And misguided as she was, she is accountable. Members of the jury, it is your duty to see that she is held accountable. I ask you to find her guilty.”

  Those twelve people all stare at me now, no smiles from any of them. Do they think they can see the truth in my eyes? I thought that if my mother’s ultrasound was clear, I wouldn’t care about all this. But now I find I still do. One of the bearded twins scratches at his chin. Heh, heh, the man in the front coughs.

  I study the jury, too, and can’t see through their expressions any more than they see through mine. It’s been a year since it all happened. I don’t think I can listen to one more question or statement about that Valentine’s Day. Mom is okay, that’s all that matters. But the judge speaks just as Michael McCann warned me he would. He has to make his formal charge to the jury.

  First he talks about their duties and how they have to decide based upon all the facts presented to them — not anything they’ve heard in the media, not public opinion or their own sympathies, prejudices, or fears. They don’t have to worry about punishment, they just need to discuss, listen, and decide the case for themselves. Blah, blah, blah. On and on he talks about witnesses, exhibits. He reviews the testimonies. I want to explode, he’s crammed so much law into it. Finally, it all seems to boil down to this: I gave her candies until she began choking and then walked away. I withheld medical assistance. If that’s what all twelve of them believe beyond a reasonable doubt, they should find me guilty.

  “The jury will now retire to make its deliberations.”

  “All rise,” the court clerk commands. The twelve members shuffle out.

  “What do we do now?” I ask Michael.

  “We wait.”

  “How long?” I ask.

  “It depends how fast they make up their minds and whether they all agree on the verdict. Why don’t you go to the cafeteria and I will call you.”

  “Can we go outside somewhere instead?” I plead. “Everyone el
se will be in the cafeteria.”

  “Sure,” Michael answers.

  My father nods. Once outdoors, there’s a parking lot but no sidewalk and no decent mall nearby. No place for us to go.

  Some kids from my class are outside smoking. I don’t wave.

  “We can cross the street and walk for a bit over there.” My mother points to a strip mall.

  My father grabs our hands. He wants to keep us safe from the cars, from the dangerous outside world. He grips too tightly because he just can’t save us from that inside world behind us. Wolfie grabs on to my other hand. This is all I need. I feel safe.

  At the little strip, there’s a Greek diner, a convenience store, a pharmacy, and a doughnut shop. No one wants a coffee or doughnuts so my father picks up a wild-cherry gum pack from the convenience store. He opens the package, offering them around outside. I take one. My mouth is so dry. I chew, but then it’s too sweet. Wolfie grabs two.

  I see my mother huddling from cold as she pulls out a single stick for herself. We should have stayed inside the court building. The weather is too much for her.

  “Mom?” Purple shadows her eyes, she couldn’t have slept. We could still lose her; a doctor’s okay this morning is not a guarantee. I want to say something to her what I couldn’t say for a long time. It’s hard for me so I try in German first. “Ich liebe dich.” She looks at me, startled. I reach out and hug her gently. “I love you, Mom.”

  Dad’s cell phone goes off then. We break apart. “It’s too soon,” he says. “How can they have decided so quickly?” He sounds anxious, as though an early decision will not be the one we hope for. “Hello. Yes, yes.” He snaps the phone shut. “It’s time. We have to go back.”

  We return to the court with the others. I take my special seat with my parents and brother in the row behind me. There is a buzz of people as the court fills again.

  The judge looks up at the jury. Finally, he says: “Have you agreed upon a verdict?”

  Heh, heh, heh. The nervous cougher stands. “We have, Your Honour.” He coughs again. “We find the defendant . . . not guilty.”

  Behind me kids leap up and cheer. I step down from my box into the aisle where Mom jumps up to join me. We hug and my father hugs around us. Wolfie joins our circle. I’m as overjoyed that the whole thing is over as I am about the verdict.

  Michael McCann shakes my hand and wishes me good luck.

  “Thank you so much.” I hug him when we finish hand shaking. When I look up I see Mr. Brooks. We hug too.

  “Sunny, I always knew you were innocent. I adjusted your marks for last year. You’ll have an A+ on the journal and a B+ in English. You deserve it for all that you’ve been through.”

  “Thanks, Mr. Brooks.”

  I hug Alexis and high five with Chris and Josh. Some of my classmates pat my back.

  Donovan looks at me but I can’t touch him. “Shoulda never happened, Babe.”

  I nod. There is a reporter and the flash of a camera. My father tells me he’s okayed the shot so everyone everywhere will know that I’m innocent.

  When the brightness ends, I think I see Cole’s face. I feel a sharp pang in my chest. But when my eyes focus more clearly I can see that the face is an older, more wrinkled version and it belongs to his mother. No way would she have let Cole attend.

  “Mrs. Demers!” I rush towards her and she turns away. “Don’t go yet!”

  She hesitates for a second, but then keeps walking.

  It’s that small hesitation that gives me hope. I want to grab her shoulders and make her listen to me. But my mother catches up to me and drapes one arm over my shoulder. “She is very sad right now. It is not your fault.”

  Mrs. Demers needs time, I get that. My mother thinks it’s not my fault and Cole doesn’t blame me either. He said so in his testimony. But it’s the wink and smile I remember most. Maybe I won’t be able to make things right with his mother, but I know I can help him. Help him with his physio, with his speech, whatever.

  Everyone always said how good I was with old people. That’s because I was patient. And my grandmother didn’t nickname me Sunny for nothing. I will bring sunshine into Cole’s life again. If she sees her son growing stronger, won’t Mrs. Demers be happy again too?

  I just have to be patient.

  The End

  acknowledgements

  A huge thank you to Brendan Neil, a criminal trial lawyer who often defends young people. Brendan guided me right from the premise of the story, through the trial process (I sat in on a couple of his trials), to the final verdict, suggesting scenarios and wording changes along the way. The condensing and other liberties taken with the Canadian justice system were purely for the sake of the story and all of my own.

  Thank you also to test teen reader Ola Lukawski and to many other writers who read this story: Gisela Sherman, Lynda Simmons, Jennifer Filipowicz, Rory D’eon, and Jim Bennett, to name a few.

  While the emotional pain of loss due to Alzheimer’s disease are true to my own experience, the names, characters, places, and incidents were produced entirely from my imagination.

  about the author

  When Sylvia McNicoll was born (in Ajax, Ontario), her mother contemplated naming her Sonja or Sunshine. The family later moved to Montreal, Quebec, where Sylvia graduated from Concordia University. Her writing career began when she returned to Ontario with her husband and three children. She has written twenty-seven books for young people and has won the Silver Birch Award and the Manitoba Young Reader’s Choice Award.

  Sylvia enjoys long bike rides but always wears a helmet and never rides in the winter.

  Copyright © 2012 by Sylvia McNicoll.

  The right of Sylvia McNicoll to be indentified as the Author of this work has been asserted by her.

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, or by any information storage or retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher.

  James Lorimer & Company Ltd., Publishers acknowledges the support of the Ontario Arts Council. We acknowledge the financial support of the Government of Canada through the Canada Book Fund for our publishing activities. We acknowledge the support of the Canada Council for the Arts which last year invested $24.3 million in writing and publishing throughout Canada. We acknowledge the Government of Ontario through the Ontario Media Development Corporation’s Ontario Book Initiative.

  Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication

  McNicoll, Sylvia, 1954-

  Crush candy corpse [electronic resource] / Sylvia McNicoll.

  Electronic monograph.

  Issued also in print format.

  ISBN 978-1-4594-0064-1 (EPUB).--ISBN 978-1-4594-0065-8 (PDF)

  I. Title.

  PS8575.N52C78 2012 jC813’.54 C2012-900033-7

  This digital edition first published in 2012 as 978-1-4594-0064-1

  Originally published in 2012 as 978-1-4594-0062-7

  James Lorimer & Company Ltd., Publishers

  317 Adelaide Street West Suite 1002

  Toronto, Ontario

  M5V 1P9

  www.lorimer.ca