by Andi Loveall
“Two things: You’ll enjoy it as it’s guaranteed to go. If it goes well, it’s safe to say that you’ll love it.”
“What if it goes bad?”
“It won’t. Hence the guarantee.”
“You can’t make a guarantee like that. We could get eaten alive by a giant hedgehog. I doubt I’d be enjoying myself then.”
“If that happens, you’ll have my sincerest apologies. But it won’t.”
“Well played,” he said. “I’m in.”
Lucius and Rocky were waiting for them outside.
Devin looked around. “Where’s Cora?”
“Says she’s not coming. But Lucius talked her into letting us borrow the car.”
“Hang on … ”
Devin trotted over and rapped on her door, peering in through the screen.
“Come in,” she called.
She was sprawled on her stomach, eyes locked on her book. Mo was curled up next to her, purring his head off.
“Hey … Are you okay?”
“Yeah, why?”
“What do you mean why? You’ve been totally nonexistent these past few days.”
“ … I’ve been reading a book.”
He blinked. “That’s why?”
“It’s about this girl who dies of an eating disorder and then comes back as a spirit to help her friend survive the same eating disorder. It’s so good. I can’t put it down.”
“Everyone’s going out. You won’t come?”
“Like I said, I’m reading a book.”
“Can I stay with you and write while you read?”
Her eyes softened for a second, but she remained stern. “Tempting, but no.”
“Seriously?” He grimaced, annoyed. “So if I don’t go with them, I have to just sit in my cabin alone?”
“If you care about me, you’ll go. I need some time to think.”
“Uh oh.”
“Not about you, Devin.”
“No … Of course not.” He chewed on his lip. It was as if a bit of shrapnel from the land of last week had just come flying through space and sideswiped him. He minimalized the despair in his face as much as possible and made a graceful exit.
The others were waiting for him at the start of the trail.
“You guys coming?” Lucius said.
“I am. She’s not.”
“Cool,” Lucius said, shrugging. “Let’s go.”
As they walked down the hill, he began to feel better. Screw it. The night was young, and so was he. Anything could happen.
They begged Panky to tell them where they were going, but she just smiled, watching the road as she drove. The energy was rising and everyone seemed to feel it, talking and laughing and singing along with the radio. Devin looked out the window and watched the fireflies, feeling lucky on so many levels. He had always loved road trips.
A few months after his mother’s death and a few days after Aaron turned sixteen, he pulled up in front of Devin’s house in a shiny dark blue coupe. Devin hopped in, expecting to arrive at school feeling a little cooler than the day before. Instead, and without warning, Aaron got on the freeway and headed out of town. Devin didn’t protest. He was at the peak of his rebellious teen years, and since these were the days before every kid had their own traceable GPS smartphone, he knew they would be safe until that night. The school would send out an automated call informing their parents of their absence, but Leon was working the evening shift, and Aaron’s parents were too busy with their own social lives to notice. Young Aaron and Devin roared ahead like warriors, swerving in and out of lanes, and yelling at cars that were going too slow. They stopped wherever they wanted, ate at nice restaurants, and even found some girls who were also ditching for the day. They made it all the way to Santa Barbara before realizing that they didn’t have the gas money to get home. Devin was grounded for a month, but it was worth it.
Panky pulled into the parking lot of a grimy looking pizza parlor and shut off the engine.
“This is the surprise?” Rocky said. “Pizza?”
“We’re meeting someone,” she said, climbing from the car.
“Who?” Lucius raised an eyebrow as they all got out after her. “We don’t know anyone out here.”
“Sure we do.”
“You don’t mean … ”
Screeeeeeeeaaannnccchhhh!
They all jumped. It was hard to tell where the sound originated from, but then the vehicle appeared. The word “car” would be far too generous to describe the beat-up black and gray thing that was barreling down the road in their direction.
“Junior.” Lucius breathed.
“He’s … not stopping,” Devin said, backing away. “He’s not stopping!”
As the vehicle slammed the curb and bounced up the grassy slope that enclosed the parking lot, Devin caught his first glimpse of Junior, a little guy with determined eyes and greasy brown hair. There was a cigarette crushed between the flat line of his lips.
He revved the engine and rolled the rest of the way up, landing with a crunch and screeching to a halt right in front of them. He wrestled with the gearshift before hopping out with the engine still running. His eyes were glazed over like he was waking from a dream. Then he spotted Panky and Lucius.
“Ooohhh!” he howled and ran toward them. “Didn’t I say I’d be here? You didn’t believe me, did ya? Did ya?”
He grabbed Panky around the waist and lifted her into a spin. She squealed, slapping at him.
“Put me down, you dirty slag!”
He dropped her down and shook hands with Lucius.
“Junior,” Lucius said, grinning. “These are my good friends, Devin and Rocky.”
“How ya’ll doin’ tonight? Bet you think I won’t remember your names, but I will. Revin, Docky, ooh I’m good! But listen up, I can’t stay long—and I was never here, you understand? I got a Cambodian after me.”
Junior’s eyes darted around. He lowered his voice.
“Well, I think he’s Cambodian. He might be from Hawaii—not sure. But he’s coming and oooohheee is he pissed. So, I’m going to Knoxville to start a new life. Gonna get me a nice little wife, have some kids, go to church on Sundays—all that.”
“Shameful,” Panky said. “What’s to become of your stash?”
“Get it while it’s hot.”
“Did you got the tickets?”
“Would I lie to you? Would I? Would I? Step into my office!”
Junior led them over to the vehicle and took a painful-looking dive into the front seat, where he began sorting through some random crap on the floor.
Devin took a second to look at the thing. The make was unrecognizable, although it appeared to have once been some sort of ’90s model sedan before it was lit on fire. It also appeared that the entire top half had been removed with a chainsaw.
“Who is this guy?” he said to Lucius.
“The mushrooms,” Lucius whispered. “Meet the source.”
Devin’s eyes widened. “Pillow-case weed guy?”
“Yep.”
“What are the tickets for?”
He made a face as if it were obvious. “For the party.”
“Tickets, tickets, tickets,” Junior sang, pulling them out. “What else you want? I got K, G, Oxy, oh and these … I know you’ll want these.”
He punched open the glove box and pulled out an orange prescription bottle filled with little pills. He informed Panky that they were the same as the last batch, and he had eight left. She bought them all, along with the tickets.
“I hope ya’ll enjoy yourselves,” Junior said. “After I get settled in Knoxville, you can come for a barbecue. Alcohol only—I’m going to be a law-abiding citizen now, paying my taxes and everything. Ooooheee! It’ll be good.”
“Will do,” Panky said. “Good luck with the Cambodian-Hawaiian.”
“Shit!” Junior spun around in a circle, eyes scanning the surrounding area. “I almost forgot!”
He settled into the driver’s seat and revved
the engine, sticking a fresh cigarette in his mouth and waving as he roared off. After another horrendous screech and a near collision with a minivan, he vanished around the corner.
Panky sighed. “Isn’t he a jewel?”
They got back in the car and took off once again. After a few minutes, they were heading into the quieter country.
“So,” Devin said, leaning up into the front seat. “Where are we going?”
“It’s just a few miles more,” she said.
“ … What’s up with those pills?”
“Pills?” Rocky perked up. “What pills?”
“Where were you three seconds ago? The pills she got from Mr. Apocalypse.”
Panky dug the container out of her purse and tossed it into the back.
“We took the same kind a few months ago,” Lucius said. “We even tested them. They’re pure. The best of the best.”
“Ecstasy!” Rocky exclaimed, opening the container and popping a pill into his mouth. “I’m taking one.”
“You twat!” Panky shouted, glaring at him in the rearview mirror. “We were supposed to take them together.”
“What are you waiting for, then?”
“Good point,” she said, reaching over her shoulder and motioning for a pill. Rocky obliged, giving one to Lucius and Devin too.
Devin placed it on the palm of his hand. It was tiny and had a perfect star imprinted in the center. He had never seen one before, although he heard all about them from a few kids in high school who were rich enough to make it to the big parties in San Francisco every weekend. Aaron was supposed to get some hooked up a few times, but it always fell through.
“Wait,” he said. “Should we do this without Cora?”
“She chose not to come,” Panky said. “Why should we miss out?”
Devin nodded, pausing. He debated with himself for a second before putting the pill in his mouth and gulping it down.
“Right then,” Panky said. “Let’s go get amongst it.”
They continued up the windy mountain road, passing beneath an old bridge that was covered in dark, hairy vines. He felt a rush of tingles all over his body. He was once again entering into new territory.
***
It took a while to start feeling it. Once he did, he knew he would never be the same.
He ran down the hill, legs moving as fast as they could. Lucius was up ahead of him, his dreads bouncing, his fists in the air like an Olympic athlete about to cross a finish line. Panky and Rocky were falling behind, but Devin couldn’t slow. The music was pounding in his chest. He needed to be there, dancing at its epicenter.
They had spent the first few minutes just walking around the campgrounds, which were complete with rolling hills, an amphitheater, and a picturesque lake. The place had been decorated like some sort of psychedelic fairy wonderland, with glow lights and tapestries and trippy colors everywhere. There were booths with art and jewelry and t-shirts, and places you could buy things like hummus and fruit bowls and vegetable stir-fry. There were people everywhere, their skin bright and beautiful next to the dark shapes of the forest. People with crazy outfits and even crazier hair, people with glow toys and sparkle toys, people all set up in their little camps with their coolers of food and their lawn chairs. As he looked around at them all, he began to feel as if he had known all of them his entire life. The others seemed to be feeling it too, and that was when they decided they had to dance.
“We’re alive!” he shouted as he ran.
They hit the edge of the crowd and began to dance their way in, heading toward the stage. Piles of bodies swayed and stomped around them, one entity brought to life by the sickeningly sick beat. There was an elfish woman with long red hair who was dancing with two tiny gold hoops. There were two blond dudes in matching red outfits, popping and locking and doing the robot. There was a tall, beautiful black girl spinning in a circle nonstop for what seemed like minutes and minutes, her skirt circling around her. Fire dancers twisted and turned on the stage, surrounding the DJ, who had bright white hair that went down to his waist and appeared to have been transported there from ancient Japan.
And then, the sight he knew that he would remember forever: the man on the stilts, painted silver and blue, and covered in feathers. He was a phoenix, rising from the flames of their passion.
Devin stretched out his arms, reaching for the deity. The music was possessing him, lifting him up, enriching his brain with secret knowledge and maps. It went on and on, breaking apart and piecing back together in dirty, sexy squares that rolled like a robotic language. It was shards of glass, forming like crystals all over an alien planet.
“I love you, brother,” Lucius said, tackling him into a hug.
“I love you, too, dude,” he said.
There had never been anything like this feeling. Ever. It was like being wrapped in a blanket made from blowjobs and birthday cakes. It was like dying a painless death and being reincarnated as pure moonlight. It was like finding a hundred dollars on the ground, getting a new kitten, and getting laid all in the same half hour. It was ecstasy.
Rocky crashed in on their hug. “Hey, did you guys see that girl? She’s wearing pasties.”
Devin looked around but didn’t see. Rocky disappeared into the crowd, yelling out: “Pasties! Hey, pasties!”
His heart swelled as he imagined Rocky finding this pasty-clad goddess and falling in love. Cora’s eyes flashed across his mind, and he tried to imagine her in pasties. It overloaded his pleasure sensors, turning his knees to rubber.
“It’s too much,” he said, stumbling. “I’m gonna puke.”
Panky and Lucius were his lifeboat. They shuttled him out of the crowd and lay him down in a clear area of the grass. Panky sat beside him and held his head in her lap, and he stared up at her like a dying soldier, watching as she lit a cigarette. Lucius sat beside them, and Devin gripped onto them both, squeezing hard.
“My eyes are clenching.”
“That happens,” Panky said. “Try not to grind your teeth.”
“You’re here with me. You guys are here with me, right now.”
“We’re here,” Lucius said, cuddling them. “And we’re being quite naughty, aren’t we?”
“Oh God please, can we be?” Panky said. Lucius growled and tried to bite her, making her gasp like she was having an orgasm.
“I love you guys,” Devin said, watching them. “I love you so fucking much.”
“We love you too, Devin,” Panky said. “I’m sure you already know.”
He smiled and looked up, marveling at the stars. White stars, in the heavens and in his brain. The love was boiling in his veins, and sweat was pouring from every pore on his skin. He didn’t understand how he could be lucky enough to find this place.
“With great risk comes great reward,” he said.
Before Panky or Lucius could respond, Rocky appeared with a new pasty-clad friend in tow.
“Hey you guys,” he said, waving and coming over. “This is Lucy.”
She had short pink hair, and most of her body was covered in glow paint. She gave them each a kiss on the cheek, stopping when she got to Lucius. Her eyes were like saucers.
“You have the most beautiful hair.”
“Thank you.”
“May I touch it?”
“Absolutely.”
She fingered the biggest of his dreads, letting out a little whimper.
“It has the weight of a roll of old-fashioned coins.”
Lucius chuckled. “Does it?”
“I’ve noticed something, and I think you’ll find it important: Both our names begin with Luuuccceeee.”
“I did actually notice that too.”
“Would you like to make a child together?”
“Hey!” Rocky furrowed his brow. “You said I could do that.”
“That was before I saw the man with hair like ropes of gold.”
Lucius giggled, glancing at Devin, who smiled and gave him a nod of approval.
Th
ey all curled up on the ground in a human puddle, draping their body parts over one another. They talked and talked, and Devin could hear himself going on about Cora in long, rambling sentences. Everyone was giving him all sorts of advice, and he wasn’t really absorbing any of it—there was too much touching and rubbing and groaning going on around him. The music beat on, transforming the feeling in his mind with every changing second.
“I think it’s beautiful,” Lucy said, her eyes rolling back as Lucius massaged her shoulders. “You two are so sweet together. I definitely think you’ll be married someday soon.”
Devin believed her, even though his ecstasy-induced ramblings hadn’t given her enough information to make such an assessment. It seemed like she did know, like everyone knew everything about everyone else because they all shared one giant brain.
“Why don’t you call her?” Lucy suggested. “I’m sure she’d like to hear some of this herself.”
“Yes,” Devin said, sitting up. “Why don’t I call her?”
“Because you’re off your tits,” Panky said, trying to pull him back down. “And because the reception is shoddy out here. Anyway, I forgot my phone in the car.”
“Can I try?”
“No. Stay here with us.”
“Please?”
She dug her keys out of her bag. “Fine.”
He hurried back to where they parked. When he got there, he unlocked the door and spotted the phone on the dash. He punched the screen to light it up and felt his heart skip.
Seventeen missed calls, all of them from Cora.
His rolling brain tried to convince him that she regretted her decision to stay home, but his gut told him something was wrong. He tried to return the call and was met with an empty beeping sound.
“Shit,” he said, holding the phone up in the air. “Come on. Bars … Give me bars.”
The phone began to ring.
“Hey! Cora? Hello?”
“Devin.” Her voice was cutting in and out.
“Hey, it’s me. Can you hear me?”
“Devin … get me?”
“What?”
“Devin, where are you? Can you come get me?”
“Panky took us to some trance party out in the woods. Where are you?”
