Finding Paige: (The Paige Diaries #1)

by D. K Lake

  Dario's dad was mostly out of the picture nowadays. His parents separated when he was nine, his mom started drinking and then she met Joe who was a complete asshole to Dario, and he hardly helped out with the house and bills.

  "One of the guys working there is training me and I'm taking this course at night school so I'll be fully-qualified."

  "So you've been working this whole time?"

  "Pretty much."

  "Just at the garage?"

  "Paige,"

  "What? I'm not allowed to ask if you've been working for JT?"

  "You know I don't like talking to you about this."

  "You hardly talk about anything with me."

  "Yes, because I don't want you involved."

  "You act like I'm some silly little girl that can't handle it. I'm only ten months younger than you."

  "I know you're not silly, Paige. But it's stuff you don't need to know about."

  "Right." I gripped the edge of the bed. "Wait. Is that why you bought the garage? To launder drugs money?" It suddenly clicked.

  He doesn't respond which answers my question.

  "Ohmigawd, is that what it's for?" I stand up again. "You could go to jail!"

  "I'm not going to jail." he snorted.

  I shook my head and grabbed my school bag off the floor.

  "I don't even know what I'm doing here." I muttered, making my way to the door but Dario was already in front of me, blocking my escape.

  "Just stop a minute,"

  "No, move out of my way. I can't believe you would be so stupid."

  "I had to, P."

  "What? No." I tried to dart around him but it didn't work and he hooked an arm around my waist and walked me back to the bed, removing my bag from my shoulder and dropping it back on the floor.

  He then put his hands on my shoulders and pushed me down onto the bed.

  "We were going to lose the house." he said, keeping his hands on me.

  "What?"

  "My stepdad had missed a bunch of payments. To Joe, strippers and gambling are more important than where we live. If I hadn't have stepped in my mom and little sister would probably be homeless right now."

  "Your stepdad is the worst." I grumbled.

  "Yeah, he is." Dario sunk onto the bed next to me.

  "I didn't know what to do. I needed money. JT had money, but he wanted to put it into a business we could use to transfer the money. He said he'd buy the place and I could pay him back in installments from whatever I made working for him. He also loaned me enough money to cover the house repayments."

  "How long until you've paid him back?"

  He shrugged.

  "It's no big deal. He's not in a rush for the money back. At least now with the garage bringing in money I can take care of my mom. I just wish she'd kick fucking Joe out for good."

  "Why does she keep him around?"

  "She doesn't want to be alone and he keeps the bed warm on the nights he actually bothers to come home."

  "But she's not alone, she has you and your sister."

  "My sister is smart and will no doubt be off to college. She keeps talking about going to medical school with her best friend and wants to train as a nurse."

  "She's only fifteen. She might change her mind."

  "She won't. When Cami puts her mind to something it usually sticks."

  "But still, she's not leaving yet and you're still at home to keep your mom company."

  "Actually...I moved out."

  "What? When?"

  "A few months ago. It's nothing special, I'm only sleeping on a pull-out bed at the garage, but it beats coming home at night and being yelled at or having a beer bottle chucked at my head."

  "I'm sorry."

  "It's not your fault. It's my mom's for not kicking his ass to the curb."

  We sat in silence for a moment.

  "I wanted to call you sooner," he said softly, turning to look at me and picking up my hand. "But I've been trying to keep you away from all of this." He opened my hand and flattened his palm against mine. "I want to protect you, Paige. I'm trying to keep you safe. It's the reason I haven't called sooner. I was trying to do what's right, trying to stay away from you, trying to let you go, but it's been harder than I thought it would be. I thought about you every day." he admitted, meeting my eyes.

  "When you didn't call, I thought it was because you didn't like me."

  He frowned at me with a smile.

  "No, silly. If I didn't like you I wouldn't be here right now."

  He reached up with his other hand and brushed the hair away from my face and cupped my cheek, and I instinctively leaned into his palm.

  "I was drunk when I sent you that Emoji. I couldn't stand not talking to you and it finally got to me. But I never ignored you because I didn't want to speak to you." he told me.

  I lifted my hand to his and held his palm against my cheek. His skin was calloused and rough; mine soft and velvety. We were opposites in every way, but I couldn't help but be drawn to Dario Boston.

  "I missed you." he said, smiling.

  "I missed you, too."

  I reached for him and wrapped my arms around his neck and he pulled me toward him and lifted me onto his lap. He hugged me so tightly as though he was afraid to let go.

  "So, what do you want to do?" he asked when we finally broke apart.

  "I don't care. I just want to be with you."

  "We've got all night." he reminded. "How about some food? You must be hungry after driving all day?"

  I nodded in agreement and he brushed a chaste kiss across my lips before sliding me off his lap. "There's this place just around the corner that sells great burgers."

  "Sounds good." I smiled. "Just let me use the bathroom first."

  "Sure," He reluctantly let go of my hand just long enough for me to use the bathroom, and then he attached his hand to mine again and we left the room.

  Dario took me to this cute little diner which was just around the corner. I ordered a chicken burger and Dario ordered a cheeseburger and fries. We didn't talk much but he did ask me about my new school and if I'd made any friends. I think he wanted to know if I had made any male friends specifically.

  He insisted on paying for lunch even though I offered to pay for myself. After we left the diner, Dario led me across the road and into a park and we walked along the edge of the river where children were feeding the ducks.

  We eventually headed back to the motel room and I had to visit the bathroom again having drunk too much Coke at the diner. We settled on the bed with the TV on. I nestled closer to Dario and rested my head on his chest, and he lifted his arm around me. I wasn't paying attention to anything on the TV. All I could focus on was the sound of Dario's steady heartbeat.

  (thump thump...thump thump)

  Whereas mine was going crazy inside my chest.

  At some point, I must have drifted off because when I woke up again the room was darker and outside looked black. The TV screen flickered, casting shadows on the walls.

  I let out a yawn and started to sit up and Dario stirred behind me. I turned to see him looking sleepy-eyed and yawning too.

  "I don't remember falling asleep. What time is it?" I asked.

  Dario looked over his shoulder at the nightstand.

  "9:40."

  "You should have woken me. I've been asleep for most of the day."

  "You're not the only one. I think I passed out not long after you." He yawned again and got up off the bed and wandered into the bathroom. I waited until he'd finished and then I used the bathroom after him and when I came back out, I found him sitting at the end of the bed.

  "I can't believe we slept for so long. I'm not going to be tired tonight now."

  "Well, me neither. But...." He reached for his school bag and unzipped it. "I brought you something," He lifted out a couple of bottles of something pink.

  "What is it?"

  "I dunno. I think it's strawberry. The girls love it."

  I stared at him for
a moment.

  "You get girls drunk a lot?" I asked but it came off sounding bitchy and jealous.

  "No. I don't make a habit out of it." He held onto the bottle and reached back into the bag for a bottle opener. "I asked my sister what she likes to drink, and she said these are great."

  "Cami drinks?"

  "She's always out at the weekends with her friends. I spend most of my time tracking her down to make sure she's not doing anything stupid."

  "What are you going to drink?" I asked and he pointed to a box of beer in the corner I hadn't noticed.

  "I also have vodka and a bottle of Coke, but I don't think you'll be able to handle it."

  "Says who?"

  "Says me. You don't normally drink, P."

  "I do."

  He raised an eyebrow at me.

  "I've drunk vodka before with Em." I inform him.

  "Em's a bad influence on you." he muttered.

  "You know what, I think I'll have a vodka and Coke." I folded my arms and tried to look confident.

  "Really?"

  "Yep."

  "Okay, but you're only allowed the one because you have to drive back home tomorrow."

  "Are you always this boring?" I joked, throwing caution to the wind.

  Tonight, I wanted to let my hair down.

  "You think I'm boring?" He put the bottle back down and stood up in front of me and I had to crane my neck to look up at him. He was still growing but he'd overtaken me several years ago.

  "I don’t know. I don't really know you outside of work. We've never hung out before like this." I gesture to the motel room.

  "Not because I haven't asked you to." he reminded.

  "I know, and I'm sorry, but my mom-"

  "Paige, it's okay. You don't need to explain."

  "I'm guessing your mom isn't like that. I bet you got to go out and do whatever you wanted all the time when you lived at home."

  "My mom only cares about her nails and if there's wine in the fridge. You shouldn't apologize for having a mom that loves you and wants to see you do well. She's only trying to protect you."

  "I know that. I really do, but sometimes it's too much, you know? I'm seventeen and I'm still not allowed a boyfriend or to stay out past 9 o'clock. It's…suffocating." I sighed.

  He rubbed his hands up the sides of my arms.

  "If I'm being really honest, I prefer it that you haven't been out every weekend partying and getting drunk with Em. I already have my work cut out for me running around after my sister, I don't want to have to chase after you as well."

  "And why would you want to do that?"

  "Um...Party. Alcohol. Guys. Those three words make me nervous as hell when I think of you going anywhere without me."

  "Well, I've never been to a party. I mean, I don't think I can count the parties I went to when I was growing up, the ones where I got to eat cake and jump on a bouncy house." I smiled.

  "I do worry about you around other guys." he admitted.

  "Why?" I laughed.

  "Paige," he said seriously. "Have you looked at yourself recently? You're growing into a woman."

  My throat was suddenly dry and my skin felt flushed.

  Dario saw me as a woman? Not just some silly girl he used to work with.

  "So how about that drink?" I asked, clearing my throat and looking around the room and I spotted the vodka bottle and Coke on the side.

  Dario stepped around me and walked over to the side unit and picked up the vodka bottle and looked around the room. I wondered what he was looking for. He then crossed the room and picked up an empty water bottle he had left on the side and poured a little vodka in and then he added some Coke.

  "Have you drunk any of this?" I asked referring to the vodka bottle.

  "I had a bit last night but I drink it straight."

  I looked back at the vodka bottle on the side and picked it up and unscrewed the cap.

  "Paige, you don't have to prove anything to me-"

  Before he could finish that sentence I had already taken a mouthful down, regretting it instantly. I coughed and covered my mouth.

  "What is this?" I coughed again.

  "Vodka." Dario chuckled at my reaction. "It's just really strong. You need to be careful with it."

  Yeah, okay. Drinking it straight is the devil's game.

  "Why do you have it?"

  He shrugged.

  "It helps me to sleep at night.".

  "You have trouble sleeping?"

  "I always have trouble sleeping." he told me, holding out the vodka and Coke for me to take.

  He went over to the box of beer and lifted one out and uncapped it using the side cabinet. I'd only ever seen it done that way in the movies.

  "So...what do you want to do?" I asked, taking a seat at the end of the bed.

  Dario dug out his phone from his pocket and a second later, something soft and rocky filled the room and he left it on the side.

  "Is this okay?" he asked.

  "It's fine."

  I wasn't a fan of rock music, but whenever I was on my break at work with Dario he would share his earbuds with me and it was always something loud with lots of drumming.

  "Who sings this?"

  "Bring Me The Horizon." he answered.

  I'd never heard of them.

  Dario was always introducing me to new things.

  "I like it." I smiled.

  "The album's called amo." he added and I just nodded.

  He sat down next to me dangling his beer bottle between his fingers.

  "We have music and alcohol." he said randomly.

  "Okay?" I laughed.

  "It's almost a party."

  "What else makes it a party?"

  "Dancing." He counted them off on his fingers. "Games. And of course..." His eyes locked with mine. "Kissing."

  "I can get on board with the dancing when I've had a few more drinks. I can't dance and it's terrible and there's no way I'm dancing for you sober."

  "You can't be as bad as me." he said.

  "I don't know what games we can play in here though," I mused.

  "I know a game we could play,"

  "You do?"

  "Truth or Dare." he says carefully, watching me.

  "You know I hate that game."

  "Have you ever played it?"

  "No, but I don't really want to play it after what happened the last time."

  I suddenly had a flashback to a few months before I left Colorado when Dario was at a party and called me up as part of his dare. I didn't know it was a dare at the time and I thought I was just talking to him. He confessed to me that he thinks about me when he touches himself and I foolishly fell for it. I was shocked at his words...but secretly turned on. He had asked me too if I think about him when I touch myself and I had stupidly told him I did. Then I heard laughter on the other end of the phone and I'd never been so mortified in all my life. He hung up and tried calling me back and I refused to pick up. He then sent me about fifty messages telling me it was just a dare and that no one knew it was me, but still, the whole thing is embarrassing as hell.

  "Paige, I already told you no one knew that was you."

  "So? It was still embarrassing for me." I cringed.

  "Why? Everyone does it?" he said matter-of-factly.

  "Does what?"

  "Touches themselves."

  He wiggled his eyebrows at me.

  "Stop," I said softly, not wanting to be reminded of that weird telephone conversation.

  "Has anyone else ever touched you apart from yourself?" he asked randomly.

  My cheeks turned pink and my mouth dropped open.

  "What do you think?" I answered.

  "Well, I don't know. You might have had some secret boyfriend I don't know about."

  His face darkened and I couldn’t help but roll my eyes. I shook my head with a smile on my lips as I lifted the bottle to my mouth. "You know there's no secret boyfriend." I said.

  "Have you ever kissed anyone else...o
ther than me?"

  "Why do you want to know?"

  The alcohol burned my throat as it slid down, warming my insides.

  "Because it's you."

  "No. You're the only boy I've ever kissed." I admitted.

  He reached over and brushed my hair over my shoulder, watching me carefully.

  "What about you? Any secret girlfriends? Or are you a casual hook-up kinda guy?"

  "Really?" He fixed me with an intense glare.

  "What? I don't know what you get up to." I shrugged, trying to appear casual but inside I was a nervous mess. I desperately wanted to know if there were other girls. Was I just another girl to him?

  "Paige," he said ever so softly. "There are no other girls. Sure, I've kissed a few girls over the years, but none of them are you. I noticed you a long time before you noticed me." he told me. "I remember I thought you were pretty when you first started at high school and I wanted to know who you were. I couldn't stop looking for you. And, I remember you from when we were kids." he admitted.

  The first time I ever met Dario Boston was in the playpark when I was seven or eight. He stood up for me when Mandy Shane was picking on me and I should have known back then he would be trouble.

  "What?" I laughed and covered my mouth with my hand. "You lie? You didn't notice me in high school." I snorted.

  "No, really. I remember the first day you started. You were wearing a denim mini skirt with a white top, and you had on a red cardigan and a ribbon to match tied around your ponytail. And these cute little black frames." He tapped my nose where my glasses usually sat but I had taken them off in the car before I got here because I hated wearing them and didn't want him to see me in them. Silly, I know, as he already knows I wear glasses.

  I stared at him for a moment lost for words. I remembered my first day of high school. I was so nervous to be starting high school and I got up super early to fix my hair and I had already picked out my clothes the night before. He'd noticed me?

  "You never said anything. You didn't even speak to me until we started working together."

  "No. I watched you for a while and soon picked up on how different you were from your friend. You didn't talk to boys. You weren't like the other girls. At first, this is before I met you, I thought you were religious or some shit because you never went to the usual parties or dated anyone, now I know it was because of your mom and how strict she is with you."