Plum Pudding Murder Bundle with Candy Cane Murder & Sugar Cookie Murder

by Joanne Fluke

  “Why?”

  “Because mistletoe berries are poisonous for cats. So are poinsettia leaves.”

  “I didn’t know that!”

  “Most people don’t. Christmas is very hard on cats, especially if their people don’t know how dangerous it is. Sue told me Dr. Bob had three feline patients last Christmas who almost died from eating tinsel. It gets tangled up in their insides and causes all sorts of problems.”

  Lisa just shook her head. “Maybe it’s a good thing Herb wants us to get a puppy.”

  “Not necessarily. Poinsettias and mistletoe are poisonous for dogs too, and tinsel’s not good, either. And then there are the glass balls that people use to decorate trees.”

  “A dog might bat at them and break them?”

  “Yes, and swallow some of the pieces. And then there’s chocolate. A lot of people leave a box of chocolates out on a coffee table for guests. That’s perfect dog height, and too much chocolate can kill a dog.”

  “That’s a real pity,” Lisa sounded very sympathetic. “At least if we eat too much chocolate, all we get is hyperactive. And that reminds me…we’d better stoke up on the chocolate tonight, because we have to be on our toes.”

  “Why is that?”

  “Martin Dubinski got married in Vegas, and he’s bringing his new wife to the Christmas party.”

  “Uh-oh,” Hannah groaned. “Shirley submitted her Poppy Seed Cake recipe for the cookbook and it’s being tested tonight.”

  “That’s what I mean. The ex-wife and the new wife. It’s straight out of a soap, especially since Shirley wants Martin back.”

  “She does?” Hannah was surprised.

  “I think so. At least that’s what I heard.”

  “I wish I’d known that before! Now I feel really guilty about going out with Martin.”

  “You went out with Martin?” Lisa looked positively mystified. “Why did you do that?”

  “Mother. But it was only once. Tell me what you know about Martin’s new wife.”

  “Well…” Lisa paused to take a fortifying sip of coffee. “She’s a Las Vegas dancer named Brandi Wyen. Get it?”

  “Brandywine. I get it. How did Martin meet her?”

  “I don’t know for sure, but what I heard was he married her just five hours after he flew to Las Vegas for a conference.”

  “That doesn’t bode well. What else?”

  “Before Martin and Brandi flew back here, he took her to a furrier and bought her a twenty-thousand-dollar coat so she wouldn’t be cold.”

  Hannah groaned again, envisioning the old cloth coat Shirley had worn for the past three years because she hadn’t been able to afford a new one. “Do you think there’ll be fireworks at the party tonight?”

  “It’s a pretty safe bet, especially since there’s another woman in the picture.”

  “Another woman?” Hannah was mystified that even one woman would be attracted to Martin, much less three! He was a nice enough man, but her date with him had been boredom personified. Why he’d thought she’d be interested in discussing the newest tax laws was beyond her!

  “I stopped in to see Janice Cox at Kiddie Korner after I dropped Dad off at the Senior Center,” Lisa explained. “She went to school with Martin’s secretary, Laura Jorgensen. Janice said Laura didn’t exactly confide in her, but she was pretty sure that Laura was in love with Martin.”

  “Oh, boy!” Hannah breathed, almost wishing that she had gone on for her doctorate and was now teaching in a rarified academic atmosphere that was hundreds of miles from what would probably happen when Laura and Shirley met Martin and Brandi. “I guess it’s a good thing that Laura has an accounting class at the junior college tonight.”

  “Not anymore. Janice said Laura’s class was cancelled and she’s going to be at the party to make sure that whoever tested her Smothered Chicken did a good job.”

  Hannah just shook her head. It was a disaster in the making, perhaps even another Titanic on a slightly smaller scale. “At least we can get one thing settled before the crockery starts flying.” Hannah stood up and headed for the phone by the cash register. “I’m going to call Andrea and ask her if she’ll handle your wedding arrangements.”

  “Tell her she can have complete control of everything. I’ll go along with whatever she wants to do.”

  “That’ll sweeten the pot.” Hannah started to grin as she punched in the number. “If I know Andrea, she won’t be able to resist.”

  Andrea sounded chipper when she answered the phone. “Hi, Hannah.”

  “How did you know it was me?”

  “I just got a new cell phone with built-in caller I.D. It’s a very important tool for a real estate professional.”

  “No doubt,” Hannah said, grinning a little. Andrea always had state-of-the-art electronics, and she always said she needed it because she was a real estate agent. “I called to tell you that Herb and Lisa have to postpone their wedding until Valentine’s Day.”

  “That’s too bad. Hang on a second, will you?” Hannah hung on and waited for several seconds. Then Andrea came on the line again. “Sorry about that. So why are they postponing the wedding?”

  “Jack Herman’s been accepted in a test program for a new Alzheimer’s drug. Lisa and Herb want to wait until the trials are over.”

  “That makes sense. So why did you call me?”

  “Lisa needs to spend all her free time with her dad and she won’t have time to arrange the wedding. She’d love it if someone else would take charge and I thought maybe you might…hold on a second.” Hannah put down the phone and motioned to Lisa. “I think I hear someone knocking at the back door. Can you go let them in?”

  “Sure.”

  “Sorry, Andrea.” Hannah directed her attention back to the phone. “Someone’s at the back door and Lisa went to let them in. It’s probably Mother or Carrie.”

  “No, it’s not.”

  “How do you know?”

  “Because it’s me.”

  “What are you talking about?” Hannah was thoroughly confused, especially because her phone had suddenly developed a strange new echo.

  “Turn around, Hannah. Lisa just let me in and I’m standing right behind you.”

  Chapter Three

  Hannah whirled around and practically bumped into her hugely pregnant sister. Andrea was standing there grinning, her cell phone to her ear. Despite the fact that she was almost as big around as she was tall, Andrea still managed to look glamorous. She’d arranged her shining blond hair in an elaborate twist, her make-up was perfect, and she’d draped a forest-green cashmere scarf over her fawn-colored coat so artfully, she could have been the cover model for a maternity fashion magazine.

  “You can hang up now, Hannah,” Andrea said.

  “Right.” Hannah hung up the phone and hurried to take her sister’s arm. “Come with me. You’d better sit down. I’ll get another chair so you can put your feet up.”

  “I don’t need to put my feet up. Doc Knight lifted every single one of my restrictions and gave me the green light to resume normal activities.”

  Hannah glanced at Lisa, who looked every bit as shocked as she did. “But I thought he told you to take it easy until the baby was born.”

  “He did…but that was then, and this is now. When he tested me this morning, he said he can’t wait much longer for me to go into labor. I’m overdue.”

  “What does that mean?” Hannah asked.

  “It means I should have delivered last week, or maybe even the week before. Doc says I’m getting too big, and that’s not good for the baby.” Andrea shrugged out of her coat, handed it to Hannah, and pointed at the middle of her wine red maternity dress. “See?”

  Hannah’s eyes widened. She’d seen Andrea at the beginning of the week, but now it looked as if her normally petite sister had swallowed a large beach ball.

  “Doc’s giving me until next Friday,” Andrea went on. “If I don’t have the baby by then, he’ll put me in the hospital and speed things up.”<
br />
  “How is he going to do that?” Lisa asked.

  “You don’t want to know. As a matter of fact, I don’t want to know, so I didn’t ask. I’m just hoping that if I move around enough, the baby will decide it’s time to get born.”

  “Horseback riding,” Lisa suggested.

  “What?” Hannah turned to her with a puzzled frown.

  “That’s what my mother used to do. If she went past her due date, she just went out to my grandfather’s farm and went for a ride. She said that always did the trick.”

  Hannah laughed and shook her head. “Thanks for telling us, but I don’t think this is the time for Andrea to hone her equestrian skills.”

  “That’s right, especially since the one time Bill took me riding, I fell off. I’d much rather drive around town, but first I need coffee. I haven’t had a good cup of coffee for weeks! And then I need some chocolate to give me energy. After that, I want you to give me something to do.”

  “Like what?” Lisa asked, as Hannah went off to get the coffee and cookies.

  “Like…that’s up to you, but there’s absolutely nothing for me to do at home. Grandma McCann was just in to clean and get the nursery all ready.”

  “How about decorating for Christmas?” Hannah suggested. “Once you have the baby, you might be too busy to put up the tree and everything.”

  “It’s already up and the house is all decorated. Lucy Dunwight organized the whole thing with a couple of the other kindergarten mothers and we had a party at my house. They did everything and the kids helped them. All I had to do was supervise from the couch.”

  “That’s nice,” Hannah said, setting a mug and a napkin containing two Twin Chocolate Delights in front of her sister.

  “So I have absolutely nothing to do. And I just thought that since tonight’s the Christmas party, you might have a last-minute recipe you don’t have time to test. I need to stay busy.”

  “Thanks, Andrea, but I think we’ve got it covered.” Hannah gave Lisa a warning glance that was meant to remind her that Andrea was among the ranks of the cuisine-challenged.

  Lisa just smiled, ignoring Hannah completely. “Hannah’s right. We’ve got everything under control here, but I ran into Edna this morning and there’s something she really needs for the party.”

  “Really?” Andrea took a sip of coffee and swallowed with obvious pleasure. “Why is your coffee so much better than mine?”

  Hannah just shrugged, biting back the obvious answer. Freshly brewed coffee from freshly ground beans was bound to be better than instant coffee made in a microwave.

  “So what does Edna need?” Andrea turned to Lisa again. “Whatever it is, I can make it. I’m not a very good cook, but I’ve got all day to get it right.”

  Hannah came close to groaning out loud. Any dish that Andrea prepared was bound to fail through no fault of its own.

  “It’s not food,” Lisa explained. “Edna said people always forget to bring serving spoons and I promised to find someone who could round them up for her.”

  “I can do that. It’s absolutely perfect for me. I’ll canvass house to house and while I’m at it, I’ll pass out calendars for Al. He’s got a really good one this year. It features twelve of the best homes sold through Lake Eden Realty, one for every month. And I sold ten of them!”

  “I’m surprised it wasn’t all twelve,” Hannah said, grinning at her sister. Andrea was so good at talking people into things, she could probably get desert nomads to buy kitty litter. “So how about Lisa’s wedding? Will you take care of the arrangements?”

  “Was there ever any doubt?” Andrea turned to Lisa with a laugh. “All you have to do is give me the guest list, and tell me your favorite color and your favorite flower. You can leave everything else up to me.”

  “Thanks, Andrea. This really means a lot to me.” Lisa finished her coffee and stood up. “I’m going to start decorating those sugar cookies we baked for the party. Call me when it’s time, and I’ll open.”

  Once Lisa had gone through the swinging door to the kitchen, Andrea leaned across the table. “If you give me two more cookies and a refill on the coffee, I’ll tell you what I just heard.”

  Hannah wasted no time getting what her sister wanted. Andrea always exacted payment for the latest Lake Eden gossip. “If it’s about Martin Dubinski’s new wife, Lisa already told me.”

  “That’s old news. If you were a real estate professional like me, you would have heard about it yesterday.”

  “Yes, but do you know about the twenty-thousand-dollar fur coat?”

  “Twenty-two thousand,” Andrea corrected her. “At least that’s the way I heard it. But what I’ve got to tell you is new news, not old news. And it’s going to knock your socks off.”

  “Okay. What is it?”

  “It’s about Shawna Lee Quinn!”

  “What about her?” Hannah took a deep breath and held it, hoping that her sister’s gossip didn’t include Mike.

  “She’s leaving town tonight.”

  “You’re kidding!”

  “Would I kid about something that important? Bill called me from the station to tell me. There was a death in the family and Shawna Lee’s going back home to Georgia.”

  Hannah curbed her impulse to cheer at Shawna Lee’s impending absence and did her best to react to the gravity of the situation. “I’m sorry for her loss. Who died?”

  “Vanessa’s husband. And from what Shawna Lee told Bill, it wasn’t unexpected.”

  “Who’s Vanessa?”

  “Shawna Lee’s younger sister. They’re less than a year apart and they were really close growing up. Vanessa’s husband was an octogenarian.”

  Hannah’s eyebrows shot up. Shawna Lee was in her middle twenties, and it seemed unlikely that her younger sister would marry a man who was sixty years her senior. “Her husband was in his eighties?”

  “That’s what octogenarian means. Shawna Lee told Bill that they’d been married for a little over a year before he died.”

  Hannah didn’t comment. It could have been a love match, but the term gold digger came to mind. She was trying to figure out a polite way to pose the question, when Andrea nodded.

  “I know what you’re thinking and you’re right. He was a rich octogenarian and he owned a whole string of home improvement stores. Vanessa inherited everything and from what Shawna Lee told Bill, it amounts to a lot of money!”

  “How long is Shawna Lee staying?”

  “I don’t know, for sure, but Bill asked her when he gave her the standard form to fill out.”

  “Yes?” Hannah asked, holding her breath. She hoped it was a good long time.

  “She said she wasn’t sure, that she’d been homesick for her sister and her family and she could hardly wait to go home for Christmas, even under these sad circumstances. She also promised to call him in two weeks to let him know whether she’d be coming back to her job…or not.”

  “You mean there’s a chance she won’t come back?” Hannah could hardly believe her good fortune.

  “That’s what it sounds like to me. Bill has to hold her job for a month. That’s a union regulation. But after that, the job can be posted at the sheriff’s discretion.”

  “And Bill’s discretion will be right away?”

  “It will be if I have anything to say about it! I feel the same way about Shawna Lee as you do, and her sister sounds like more of the same. I mean…I suppose it’s unfair of me to judge her when I’ve never even met her, but think back to when you were twenty-three.”

  “Okay.” Hannah thought back to her college days and she remembered the efficiency apartment she’d rented in a crumbling stucco building six blocks from campus. She’d fixed it all up with low-cost decorations, and it hadn’t seemed to matter that if she took longer than a three-minute shower, she’d run out of hot water.

  “You were young and you had the whole world ahead of you, right?”

  “Right.”

  “And you dated guys your own age, or
a little older, right?”

  Hannah shrugged. “I would have, if they’d asked me.”

  “Good enough. Anyway…there you are, surrounded by all these good-looking guys your age. Would you have fallen in love with a sick old man in a wheelchair?”

  Hannah did her best to think of a scenario that would fit the situation, but she came up blank.

  “I didn’t think so,” Andrea said, interpreting Hannah’s silence as assent. “Vanessa married him for his money. There’s no other explanation. Let’s just hope she shares all that cash with Shawna Lee and both of them stay put in Georgia!”

  Chapter Four

  It wasn’t until the predictable eleven-thirty break that Hannah remembered Mike’s brownies. When she did, she let out a gasp that made Lisa rush to her side in alarm.

  “It’s okay,” Hannah reassured her. “I just remembered Mike’s hot brownies, that’s all. I’d better call him and tell him not to eat them.”

  “You mean because Shawna Lee’s leaving town and you don’t have to compete with her anymore?”

  “That’s right. The green-eyed monster made me start the brownie wars, and I’m a little embarrassed.”

  Lisa shrugged. “I don’t see why. Mike deserved it. He still deserves it. He didn’t have to suggest that you serve Shawna Lee’s brownies in here!”

  “True, but I think I’d better keep the peace if I want a date for tonight.”

  “There’s always that,” Lisa said with a grin, “especially since you bought a new outfit. Why don’t you call Barbara before she goes to lunch? She can snatch the brownies off Mike’s desk and toss them, and he’ll never have to know anything about it.”

  “Good idea.” Hannah headed for the phone. A moment later, she had Barbara Donnelly, the head secretary at the sheriff’s station, on the line.