Deadly Morsel: Rosewood Academy of Witches and Mages (Darkly Sweet Book 5)

by Juliann Whicker

  “So, how did grandmama get you to marry her?”

  He raised his dark eyebrows. “She offered me her firstborn.”

  “Seriously?”

  “Only if I was the father of said child. Our marriage contract was a dizzyingly beautiful thing. I had to study it for years before I found the loophole.”

  “What loophole?”

  He leaned back and steepled his fingers on the table. He had such long, slender fingers, definitely vampire hands. I glanced over at Signore who was eating his chow mein like he seriously couldn’t care less. He should have had the Szechuan chicken. He had nothing like vampire hands. Rock fingers.

  “Are you looking for someone?” the Devil asked.

  I smiled brightly. “Are you sure no one can hear us?”

  He nodded. “Very certain.” He leaned over the table to study me. “Truly, no magic? You can’t see the weaves of my sound barrier, even if you concentrate?”

  I shrugged and kind of leaned away from him. “I can see your aura. It’s pink.”

  He smiled broadly showing his red gums. “Thank you. I’m having an extremely pleasant retirement.”

  “You’re retired? What was your job, exactly?”

  He frowned and studied his hands. “Conquering, conquesting, that sort of thing.”

  “That sounds exhausting. So now you’re just hanging out with grandmama, growing onions and roses?”

  He shook his head. “Not onions.” He blinked and his eyes met mine. He didn’t say anything while he studied me and I stared back. Grandmama wasn’t dead. She was in Darkside with the Devil. I’d thought he’d smelled like grandmama’s favorite lilac scent.

  He cleared his throat. “This is awkward.”

  “You’re a cad, stealing people’s grandmother’s like that.”

  He laughed and put his hand over mine. “Just so. The very devil.” He laughed harder while his fingers dug into my skin so electric, I barely managed to knock him off me and focus on eating my chicken.

  Drake came in at that point. I didn’t look at him, but I could feel him and I could feel my grandfather and Signore’s attention focus on the gorgeous redhead who strolled in like he wasn’t in the presence of two nauseatingly dangerous sorcerers.

  I ate so much and so fast, I was pretty sure I’d throw up as soon as I left the restaurant. Hopefully, it would be worth it. I would throw up a hundred times if he came through with the contract.

  After that visit which was both horrible and extremely awful, I went into the parking lot, reeling from too much Szechuan and the knowledge that my grandmama was being held captive in Darkside by her husband, who was probably eating bits and pieces of her. Poor Grandmama. She’d been gobbled up by a wolf so she could save thousands of humans like Missy.

  It was too dangerous to play games with mages.

  Zach waited for me beside his car. I stared at him. He stared back. My very own mage to play with, Pitch’s mage, anyway.

  I went up to him and kissed his cheek, sticking a lollipop in his front pocket.

  He frowned at me and opened the back door of the monstrous car. “Yeah, hi. I’m still going to lecture you on the entire ride back.”

  I made a face at him and tried to steal back the lollipop, but he blocked my hand and climbed into the driver’s seat before I could.

  “So, the Devil of Darkside? You didn’t think Signore was dangerous enough?” he asked as he pulled out of the parking lot.

  “I’m starting to get ulcers. Dealing with mages is exhausting. It’s like juggling magnum torchers with lit fuses.”

  “Particularly Drake. Did you see him there?”

  “He didn’t even try to wear a human girl glamour. How could I miss him?”

  “What are you doing?”

  “Trying not to throw up on your head.”

  “I appreciate the effort. I mean with the Devil, Signore, what are you doing?”

  “Other than juggling?”

  “Narcollo, that’s the name of the Darksider before this one, right? Ian’s still irritated about that. Won’t talk to anyone about what happened, maybe finds it a little bit embarrassing.”

  “Ian’s supposed to be shameless. What’s with mages not living up to their reputations?” I grabbed Zach’s shoulder. “If I wrote you a marriage contract, would you sign it?”

  He covered my hand with his. “That depends how beneficial it was for me.”

  I pulled away, but he held my hand in his fingers, iron, unbreakable. “We would negotiate until terms were mutually beneficial. Are you thinking about offering me a marriage contract? Usually mages handle that side of things.”

  “The witch proposes?”

  “No. The witch does ethereal things like create hurters no one has ever seen before and seducing other men so the mage realizes the depths of his affection.”

  “Really? I can’t imagine any witch I know doing that.”

  “Fine. Traditionally a witch will bargain with another family’s witch about their children marrying. She’ll tell her husband to come up with a contract and then the mages work on clauses and things while the witches try to convince the children it’s a good match.”

  “That sounds more like witches. Not my mother. Would you have to meet her? It didn’t work very well last time.”

  “I don’t think that would be necessary. Are we really talking about this?”

  “Shouldn’t we?”

  He finally let go of my wrist. “I thought you gave up on the whole thing. You haven’t been dating or flirting with anyone.”

  “I’m still in love with Drake. Would that bother you?” My heart pounded until he shrugged.

  “I love Pitch.”

  “I am Pitch.”

  “Nah, you’re definitely not. You don’t even have injuries when you bash my face with a gun.”

  I patted his head. “Whatever. Your hair is kind of silky. This shampoo is really nice.”

  “My hair is nice, not the shampoo. Although I drink it in the shower while I’m sudsing and…” He pulled the car over and turned to lean over the seat, his arms on the back while he stared at me. I expected to at least get a sniff of fresh baked bread, but nothing. “You actually want to marry me? Why?”

  “Will you let me marry anyone else?”

  “Other than Drake? No.”

  I shrugged. “That leaves you. I’m not sure about the, um, bedroom issues.”

  He touched my cheek with his fingertips, his eyes dark and gleaming. How could he look at me like that and not smell at least a little bit like baked goods? He said, “We haven’t ever kissed. It might not work out. If you’re anything like Viney…”

  I pressed my lips together. I wasn’t kissing another mage for a very, very, very long time. Although Zach couldn’t possibly be worse than Signore’s brother. Could he? It didn’t seem possible, but things had been a little bit out of control lately.

  “I’ve kissed your cheek. And you’ve kissed mine. Clearly we know everything we need to know about that.”

  His gaze dropped down to my lips. They felt really big on my face all of a sudden, like I was pursing them out for a kiss. I bit my bottom lip and he bit his. I shook my head and stared out the window.

  “Clearly,” he said in a soft voice before he turned around and started the car. He laughed quietly in a way that sent a shiver of terror over my skin. He’d been trying so hard to act like a nice little mage so I’d step into his jaws of doom.

  I sighed. There were so many jaws. At least he probably wouldn’t taste like mad Darksider.

  Chapter 13

  Mage

  Penny was writing a contract for Zach. A marriage contract. I’d known that was coming, but I’d just kissed her, watched her eat Szechuan chicken like a starving person. She was working with Lester on it. Lester. Revolting mage, but he was so helpful. Lucky mage who wanted to join a monastery and didn’t mind who Penny married so long as he could have an alliance with my witch. Zach’s witch. Mine.

  I ran a hand through
my hair, claws extended so blood dripped into my eyes before I pushed it back impatiently. I stepped Throughside and came out at Penny’s house.

  Revere was waiting for me in the yard. Which was very muddy. I was caked in mud days later when he finally considered my training session adequate. The way he could manipulate time, compacting it in one space so he could drill me literally for days that only passed as an hour at school, it messed with my head. Not that I wasn’t used to time discrepancies in Darkside, but the way he did it was so extraordinary, making time stretch and bubble for me so I could practice for ages while only a moment passed for him, and then if a storm was coming, could hold it off so it didn’t break until it crashed over us and passed on in a matter of minutes, just spectacular.

  He taught me all of it, whatever I wanted. The nice thing about Revere was that he was a Chemiss mage, not some Philos idiot who would wax eloquent about theory for hours before getting to something relevant. We did it. I understood in the doing, and didn’t have to listen to him talk. If only my father were more like that. Jasper too.

  The trips to Darkside to collect Sooth’s bills became more interesting as Sooth’s bill collectors got wind of our efforts. Revere’s ability to track the debtors was certainly something. He said he used me, my name, my Huntsman house and history, what he’d wanted to use to protect Penny.

  After a particularly intense bill collecting session that ended with me bent over with half my ribs broken and my face rather well-smashed, I glanced at the mage, Revere.

  “She’s marrying Stoneburrow.”

  “That’s why you spend so much time here.”

  I glanced around the dilapidated enclosed porch. How much time did I spend? It seemed like we’d been collecting bills on the same night, going back in time every time we came to Darkside. I couldn’t quite wrap my mind around that one yet.

  “I’m concerned that I’ll break. The dragon wants his treasure.”

  “Death waits in Darkside.”

  “Signore, or the Prince of Darkness, yes, I heard about that.”

  He glanced at me from his own prone position on the floor of the enclosed porch. He’d taken a good deal of battering. How did he have that much magic, that much energy? Maybe I didn’t want to know. Right, because not knowing about Jasper had been so helpful.

  “Did you make a deal with a Darksider for your magic and skills?”

  “No. My family was slaughtered and I use the magic, energy from their deaths and that betrayal to fuel me.” His eyes weren’t any harder than usual.

  “Really? So, if I killed my father and aunt and her husband…”

  He laughed, a wry sound that came rarely. “Your family and name would twist you into nothing. Someone else slaughters your house, that energy is there for your revenge, at least if you’re a good mage family who doesn’t think more of money than family.”

  “I didn’t slaughter them, did I? If so, I apologize.”

  “Sooth. Rather, Penny’s mother under his direction. Unfortunately for him, she didn’t finish the job, left me alive, staring at the blood dripping off her hands like she’d just realized what she’d done. She tried to fix them.” He flinched at the memory of whatever she’d done, trying to bring Revere’s family back to life.

  “You use the energy from her murders to protect her?”

  He shrugged. “More or less. Sooth had his fortune told by the Mavens. My family was supposed to be his downfall.”

  I shook my head and winced when pain shot through my face. “He fell for the classic, ‘self-fulfilling prophecy’. That was his error.”

  “Sending Serene to kill me was his error.”

  “Why didn’t she do it?”

  “She loved me.”

  I made a rude sound. “Not to sound skeptical, but love doesn’t work that way.”

  “She’s an aberration, not entirely but she has mage energy and connection with mages, at least a few. Me. Sooth’s control couldn’t break through her attachment. Love.”

  “If that’s true, it’s too bad that she killed your family.” Slight understatement.

  He shrugged and pushed his hair back. “It hurt deeply. I was determined to have my revenge. It really inspired me to work hard until I understood that Serene was Sooth’s puppet.”

  “He became the target.”

  Revere nodded.

  “Are you coming to the end of your family’s vengeance emergency energy fund?”

  He sat up and winced before reaching for a bottle. “Probably. Conveniently, I’ve learned enough at this point that I can do what is required with minimal effort.”

  “That wasn’t minimal,” I said, nodding at the small slip of paper that was a nearly negligible Sooth bill that had taken so much out of us.

  “Every thread must be woven into the tapestry.”

  “What is the Prince of Darkness’s game?”

  “He wants to stay sane. Penny’s a sweet shot of what he needs. He’ll keep her alive for that.”

  “And he wouldn’t want her even if she could go to Darkside?”

  He laughed, an edge to that one. “Sooth made certain she was what every sorcerer and Darkside mage would crave.”

  “Stoneburrow will have his work cut out for him.”

  “Indeed. You’ve been discussing alliance with Narcollo. Do you need assistance working out details?”

  I reached past him for the bottle and started drinking straight from it.

  Revere only shook his head and took a seat on the old orange overstuffed chair.

  When I’d drunk all I could, I lowered the bottle and glowered at him. “I’m not that kind of mage. I’m a Dragonlord. I wear bedazzled suits and fly through the sky on green bubbles. I don’t arrange treaties that are destined to go badly for me with the most disgustingly dangerous sorcerers in Darkside.”

  He studied me intently. “Why not?”

  I blinked at him. “I make mistakes.”

  He nodded. “With your friends and the dragons?”

  I shrugged and leaned over my knees while my ribs healed together. “Everyone.”

  “Your mother?”

  I sat up and stared at him. He’d lost his mother because he loved a girl. “I knew better but it didn’t matter. I do what I feel without thinking. I think, but it doesn’t matter.”

  He nodded as he studied me for a long time. “Honor. It’s inconvenient, but can be worked with.”

  “How? I destroyed my entire family heritage because I trusted a mage that I happened to like.”

  “Trust and honor? Loyalty. Courage. You must be the worst mage in the world.”

  I laughed and laughed. In far too many ways.

  Chapter 14

  Witch

  I had my contract, more or less, but it just didn’t seem complete. Of course not. There were three signatures I needed. I rolled out some tiny, insignificant hurters with some interesting fuses while I put off contacting Signore. I felt stupid calling him for deliveries when I now knew exactly what he used me for, and it wasn’t brisk business of the incendiary kind.

  It left a bad taste in my mouth, me trading sanity for him not killing me. Like I’d asked him to kill me. Also a bad taste in my mouth from… Never mind.

  I hauled the immense tome of a contract out into the rain, cute green umbrella above me, raindrops splashing off the clear plastic and leaving spattered patterns that I could probably watch forever. I stood there waiting for what felt like ages until he finally pulled up, wipers sliding back and forth on the brown delivery truck as he parked. I walked over to him slowly, careful to shield the contract from the rain.

  He looked out at me, his eyes bright and buzzing. This was such a mistake. I took a step away from him before he nodded at the packet in my arms.

  “Your contract with Stoneburrow?”

  I nodded.

  “Do you want to watch me read it or would you rather leave it with me?”

  Go into the back with him? Then again, leaving a contract with him didn’t seem like
a good idea, either.

  “Never mind.”

  He stared at me.

  I stared back.

  “Cara Mia, I warned you that it would be unpleasant.”

  “Unpleasant? He kissed my face off. I’m missing chunks of my tongue. I wake up with nightmares from the blood. Also, it was always about the energy, the pain, the sanity.”

  He studied me for a long time before he sighed. “I’m a Darksider.”

  “And I’m not.”

  He stared at me for a long, long time. “Be very cautious, Cara Mia. I am Sooth’s enemy.”

  “So am I. That doesn’t mean we’re friends.”

  He inhaled slightly. Was that a reaction? No. Rocks don’t have reactions. Vampire rocks have even fewer. “I would like to examine your contract. For your safety.”

  “Because my safety is so important to you.”

  “It is.”

  “I need to not see you for a long time. Very long.”

  He studied me. “Time is subjective.”

  “Exactly.” I turned and started walking away. My heart pounded at my bravery, turning down Signore who might give me a hug or a pat on the head if I was very lucky. What was wrong with me?

  I walked around the halls of Rosewood and realized that classes were going on. I must have stopped going at some point, stopped rehearsing with Ian, too. I went to the library and sat on the steps. I went through my contract for the millionth time. I couldn’t see it anymore. Every word was wrong no matter how right it was. I wanted to fling the entire thing in the air and throw hurters at it until there was nothing but confetti.

  I thumped my head on the massive thing a few times. I’d emailed it to Revere, but he hadn’t gotten back to me. Teddy was supposed to be my contract mage. Shudder. Signore… not exactly my go-to mage, not anymore. Jasper, I’d tried to call him but his phone was disconnected. Lester had offered to look at it more than once. He’d been a little bit pushy, come to think of it. I had a whole section on my alliances with other mages. I had to. Ian, supposedly belonged to me, although he hadn’t answered my texts or been anywhere I could find him. Apparently he was still irritated about the Narcollo thing. Hm. I could try and get in contact with him again. Brilliant idea. Or Missy. She seemed to know her way around mage contracts, but no. I wasn’t involving Missy in my mess.