Deadly Morsel: Rosewood Academy of Witches and Mages (Darkly Sweet Book 5)

by Juliann Whicker

  “She’s fine. Only slightly concussed. Narcollo is fussing over her at your hospital. He might kill you if he sees you. You’re married? I don’t feel married.”

  Oh, the contract. I only had to think about it and he inhaled sharply.

  “I take it back. She’s really married and under our protection. Drake, I think I’m going to have a mental breakdown now. Keep her safe. I’ll see you in a few days. Don’t let me know if something goes wrong. Also, your armies are still fighting in Darkside. Do you want me to do something about that? Tell me no. I’m married to her, not you. I’m not your lackey. Tell Penny she owes me some serious crafting time. Also, that I’m happy for her. And now I have her number even if she did blow up her phone. I’m going to send her disgusting mage stuff all the time. And you. Drake, be good to her. Or bad so I can rip you apart and take your place.”

  I didn’t get to say anything because he hung up. “Missy’s fine,” I said, slowly lowering the phone. “Slight concussion. She’s in the hospital. Oh, the fealty. Hold on a second.” I went over to the wall and concentrated. I unhooked the fingers of awareness, letting them slip away, Rosewood students, and Zach. He was hard to shake loose out of my head, but it was a great weight lifted when he went.

  I inhaled deeply and looked at Penny, my wife, who was staring at her finger, at the beautiful colored light that twined around and beneath the skin. My mouth went dry as I stared at her. My wife. My heart battered my rib cage. It was my duty, my pleasure to adore, protect and follow her on whatever mad goose chase caught her fancy.

  “Such a fancy witch,” my aunt said beneath her breath, but she smiled at Penny. It didn’t look entirely forced.

  I swallowed. “I forgot to wear a top hat. Were we taking a photo? I promised a photo. We’d better get refreshments before my elusive grandfather disappears.”

  “He’ll stick around as long as there’s pastrami and rye.” That was my father. “But yes, let’s get a photograph.” He raised his voice. “Into the Conservatory, if you’d be so kind. Penny would like a family photo.”

  The Devil went stiff but his wife patted his arm and smiled demurely. The next few hours went by in a swirl of photographs, toasts, and spontaneous duets, one by my father and Revere while my grandfather played the piano. Their tone was so extraordinarily excellent. The two would come up with some excellent spellwork. If my father’s expression was any indication, I wasn’t the only one thinking such things.

  “That was wonderful,” Penny said, slipping her hand in my elbow. “I didn’t know Revere sang. And your grandfather plays like a dream. This whole thing is like a dream. A very strange dream. It couldn’t possibly be real, could it?”

  I exhaled and kissed her fingers, brushing my lips over that soft perfect flesh. It was so nice that Signore had taken away all the aftereffects of her Pitch. “No, but it is anyway.” I spread her fingers with mine, gripping her hand tightly. “Do you want me to sing for you?”

  “With all these people? I’d rather we were alone.” She blushed.

  I glanced around at the strange group that somehow hadn’t gotten violent. “Your brilliance knows no bounds. Come on!” I dragged her out the French doors and onto the patio lit with a million stars and smelling like honeysuckle and jasmine.

  I took a deep breath before I sat down and took off my boots.

  “What are you doing?”

  “Sh. Very important things.”

  She giggled. “Really? Are you sure?”

  “Very.” I stood up, my boot laces knotted together over my shoulder. “Now, wife, I show you exactly what I’m made of. You said singing, didn’t you? Do you want excellent singing or bad singing? Bad would be better.”

  “Then Good. Definitely good.”

  I sighed and lunged at her, throwing her over my shoulder before I dug my toes into the old mortar of the river stones up the wall. I climbed, singing as well as could be expected while she giggled madly, her petticoats blocking my vision and feet kicking in the air while her hair trailed down behind me. I only used a little bit of magic to keep us from falling. I was that amazing. But the singing was less than superlative. Luckily for me, she wouldn’t notice the difference.

  I finally made it to the window of my bedroom, muttered an unlocking spell and pushed it open. We fell to the floor in a tangle of limbs that I never wanted to unravel.

  “Drake, you’re the best climber in the world. You can climb up to my Rapunzel tower no problem.”

  Her hair hung in curtains to either side of my face. I caught her face and drew her down to kiss me. She tasted sweet, and full of this terrified energy, like I felt. I kissed her harder, rolling onto her as I tried to make it real. This was real. Each touch, each kiss, each moment here together. Real. We’d made it to the bedroom scene.

  I pulled away and caressed her face, her neck, shoulders. “Penny Lane, I adore you.”

  “Huntsman.”

  “Yes?”

  She smiled and tugged on my nose. “You and your freckles. So adorable. I’m Penny Huntsman. I have no idea where the name ‘Lane’ originated. I think it really did come from a song or something random. I love you. Every day.”

  I kissed her face, her nose, her eyes, her chin, her cheeks and then her mouth for a long, long time, then her throat, and the expanse of the shockingly low bodice.

  “Your grandmother’s taste is peculiarly apt.”

  “Apt? What a strange mage I’ve married.”

  “Strangely irresistible. Strangely stylish. Wait a minute.” I stood up and unbuttoned my shirt. I shrugged it off quickly and then unzipped my pants and tugged them off. Penny’s eyes got large and larger until she stared at my shorts with a dumbfound expression.

  “Your panties are pink.”

  “Shorts. Or boxers. Or underpants if you must, but not panties.” I struck a pose that was both heroic and manly.

  She giggled and blushed and giggled some more. “Ah. Thanks for clearing up that extremely important point. Drake, you just took off all your clothes.”

  “Not all. I left my panties on. Your turn. Do you need help? I could light your clothes on fire, although I hear you’re better at it.”

  She gasped and twisted her hands together. “I guess I can, um, get undressed. Are you going to stand there? Watching me?”

  I nodded. “I’m not going to look away from you ever again in case some Scratcher comes and steals you.” I frowned furiously and went to her, touching her face, her arms, kissing her wrists and brushing her hair away from her face. “Penny. Tell me that no one will ever take you away from me. Tell me that I’m too terrifying and powerful for anyone to attempt it. Don’t remind me of Mitch or Signore or your Darkside Husband. He doesn’t even have a name. What kind of a man who doesn’t even have a name to give you marries someone? Seriously, he’s just…”

  She slid the shoulders of her dress down her arms revealing her singed and blood-stained bustier. I’d already seen her in it, but somehow it didn’t diminish the impact. She was so beautiful. She let the layers of skirt pool around her bare feet and then she was in pink polka dot panties and her bustier.

  “We match,” I breathed.

  She nodded and then she put her arms around me and kissed me. I lifted her up and carried her to the bed. It was high, because it hung from the ceiling. Of course. What other kind of bed would I have in my mansion?

  It swung as I slid her back then climbed in after her. Her long bare legs beckoned me closer. I slid my hands over her skin, so much skin, higher and higher until I reached the line of her exquisite pink panties. The scent of her, the feel of her, everything combined into one dizzying ecstasy beyond words, beyond thoughts, beyond consciousness.

  Chapter 33

  Witch

  He fainted.

  It was the cutest thing. Him in pink boxers, completely overwhelmed by my incredible legs.

  I sighed and hauled him up so his head was on a pillow. I smoothed his hair back and rubbed a spot of soot off his chin then I slid of
f his bed, leaving it swinging in my search for serious equipment. I settled for a sharpie.

  After he had a beautiful mustache on his upper lip, I curled around him and his pink panties. It had been an extremely long day. But I’d done it. I’d married a mage. A beautiful, wonderful mage who would always keep me on my toes until death did we part. I was so happy, I couldn’t bear it. I wrapped him in my arms as tight as I could until he started turning blue. Death by love. It would be a good epitaph.

  I relaxed my grip on his throat and snuggled into the contours of his body. No epitaphs for Drake, not for a really, really, really long time. He had to give me fifty grandchildren first.

  ***

  I stood in the enormous garage beside Drake.

  “Go ahead. Pick,” he said.

  I glanced at him before I slowly made my way down rows and rows of immensely pretty machines. I stopped in front of a sparkling green one with curved fenders.

  He stepped close behind me and wrapped his hands around my waist. His lips brushed my neck and I shivered.

  “Excellent choice. Come on.”

  He let go of me and went around to the passenger side. He got in and moved the seat back to make room for his long legs. I licked my lips and stayed where I was.

  “I don’t know.”

  “Penny Huntsman, how are you going to drive me crazy if you don’t know how to drive? It’s easy. Like falling off a dragon.”

  I went around, sliding my hand over the sparkling green metal. “What if I hurt it?”

  “It’s spelled. Also, if you didn’t notice, I have a few extras lying around.” He winked at me. I stood there on the outside of the driver’s door, just staring at my ridiculously beautiful husband. He matched the car, his dark red hair burning against his fair skin, eyes glimmering with energy and specks of green. We’d sort of stayed in his bedroom for three days. Apparently that was as long as he could manage to stay in one place at a time, no matter how active he was.

  His smile sharpened. “You’re blushing. Are you worried that I’ll take advantage of you? It’s impossible. These seats are far too close to the windshield and there is no back seat.”

  I rolled my eyes and got in. I sat down, fiddled with the seat for a minute, before I put the keys in the ignition and then killed the car.

  Drake laughed a lot in the process of teaching me not only how to drive a car, but a standard with clutches and things. I didn’t crash it immediately, mostly because I couldn’t get the thing started. After we made our way jerkingly out of the garage and down the driveway, things got a little bit easier, at least until we got to the first stop sign and I killed it.

  Drake laughed, but it wasn’t a mean laugh, it was delighted, like he loved hearing gears grind horribly. He watched me while I drove, his eyes light, steady, constant.

  It took four hours to get to Rosewood, but by the time we pulled through the gates, I was more than semi-proficient at the entire process. He pointed to the side and I killed the engine a little too suddenly. I pulled on the brake while he got out.

  I sat there for a little while, just enjoying the fact that I wasn’t even a little bit nauseous.

  “Aren’t you coming, Penny Huntsman?”

  I laughed and got out of the very low vehicle. “You keep saying my name. I think you might like it or something.”

  He took my hand and raised it to his lips while he gave me a smoldering glance that shifted into a cocky smirk. “Everything of mine looks good on you, particularly me. My name is just one of many things I’m so generous to share. Come on.”

  He turned and dragged me, but not to Rosewood, to his room or my room, whichever we were going to move into, but towards the gardens. We walked past the tower although I slowed down. On the top of the tower, no one could see what mischief we got up to.

  “Don’t dawdle, Mrs. Huntsman.” He quickened his pace and I had to stretch my long legs to keep up with him.

  We reached the iron fence that led to the woods and Drake turned to me. He reached into his inside jacket pocket and pulled out a key. “It’s your wedding present. Surprise.”

  I stared at him and then down at the little brass key that was so simple, whatever it locked could be picked with practically anything. “Um. It’s very cute.”

  He pressed it into my palm and wrapped my fingers around it while he gazed at me steadily. “Don’t hit your head when you faint.”

  I smiled and pushed his hair back off his forehead. So silky. “I’m not the one who’s been fainting lately.”

  He blushed fiery red before he shook his head. “It wasn’t fainting, it was a delayed concussion.”

  “Delayed concussion? Oh, that explains it.”

  He kissed me. He tasted like ashes, cherries, and happiness. When he pulled away his eyes were dark and gleaming. “Yes, Penny Huntsman, you made me faint from desire and terror and anxiety, also from not sleeping for a few weeks. Do you want to see your wedding present, or not?” He turned and dragged me towards the fence, his hand around mine where it clutched the key. When he almost ran into the iron bars, the air shimmered and a gate took shape in the fence, narrow with a keyhole shaped like the key in my hand.

  “You gave me a gate. Wow.”

  He tickled me on the ribs, his strong fingers knowing exactly where to touch. I shrieked and convulsed until I escaped him, through the gate. He chased me down the path that wound through the trees, bushes and foliage speeding by me unnaturally fast.

  He howled behind me and I ran faster, heart pounding until I broke into a clearing and stumbled to a stop. It was the clearing. The one where a gingerbread cottage should be. It didn’t smell like gingerbread, but it looked like it, scalloped shingles all up the front with round stained glass windows like lollipops.

  Drake wrapped his arms around me and started kissing my neck and shoulder, nibbling and tasting while I stared at the gingerbread cottage. Everything went dim around the edges and my knees went weak, but I gasped and didn’t faint entirely.

  “You love it,” he said, his voice smug before he resumed his consuming of me.

  I licked my lips, only slightly distracted by his mouth, teeth, hands…

  “Drake, you built me a house.”

  “I also burned it down, but I rebuilt it after that.”

  “Oh.”

  “Some timbers are still blackened. I thought it added a nice touch of authenticity.”

  “Why did you burn it?”

  “Because I couldn’t give it to you when we were going to get married at your mother’s. You were so beautiful. Perfect in utterly every way. I’ve never been so angry, having to tell you I didn’t want you.” He growled and tugged down the shoulder of my dress so he could taste more skin.

  I swallowed and relied on his strength to keep me up. “But you built it again?”

  “I wasn’t going to give you back the jacket, but I owed you a wedding present. I was going to give it to you after your marriage with Stoneburrow. A honeymoon cottage. I stocked it with vast quantities of champagne.”

  “You thought I’d want to spend my honeymoon with him drunk?”

  “Something like that.” He whirled me around and slid his hand up my cheek, tangling in my hair while he gazed at me. “Tell me that you love it.”

  I smiled at him all demure and shy while I glanced up at him through my eyelashes. “Love doesn’t seem to convey the weight of my affection. I adore it. You knew that I would.”

  He nodded and kissed me. His lips were soft, lingering. When he pulled away, his eyes were tender and sweet. “Thank you for marrying me, Penny. I will love you as well as I can. That doesn’t mean a whole lot coming from the worst mage in the world, but…”

  I kissed him. I was not soft, not gentle, and I only pulled away to drag him towards the gingerbread cottage. I hauled him across the leaf strewn clearing, my skin buzzing and sizzling.

  “Are you angry? I love it. You should carry me in your arms.”

  “You’re my Hansel and I’m going to nibb
le you until your flesh falls from your bones.”

  He howled and then pounced on me, knocking me to the ground. We rolled until we came to a sliding stop against the stone foundation of the house.

  He gazed down at me. “I love you, particularly with dead leaves in your hair. We should do this every day.”

  I shivered and touched his face with my now dirty fingers. “Two p.m? We’ll tuck it between church and tea parties.”

  “You say that like you’ll ever let me out of your cottage again, witch.”

  I stroked his face, tugging on his hair until I stretched up to nibble on his lips. So sweet. Soft. Wet. And then his tongue was in my mouth, much larger than a human tongue. Dragon. Before I could pull away, he hauled me up and wrapped his arm around my waist then began walking with me slowly towards the front door.

  “I’ve been thinking about starting a new business,” I said.

  “Excellent. We’re broke. You’ll have to support me.”

  “Does that mean we have to sell the pretty green car?”

  “No. It means you should use it to deliver packages. Give Signore some competition.”

  I leaned my head against his shoulder. The sun was setting, shafts of light hitting the windows and making them glow golden and delicious.

  “How did you know that was going to be my next business move? It’s so nice to know that we’re on the same page.”

  “With you, my deliriously exquisite bride, Happily Ever After is the page we’ll always be on.”

  The End

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  Wow! The last acknowledgement for this series! Darkly Sweet swept me completely away. I’m so grateful to all the wonderful individuals who cheered me on, kept me straight, and got swept right along with me. It’s been an amazing ride!