Her Secret Daughter

by Ruth Logan Herne

  Young parents dotted the beach with little ones. What appeared to be preschool groups had been hosting picnics in the shaded park when they first arrived, but as the afternoon grew later, they’d packed up their things and headed home.

  They walked through the park in the lull between little kids’ awake time and high schoolers’ streaming to the beach after school. Once they got to the carousel building, Addie adamantly refused to ride a horse, even a brightly painted one. “Dad. Josie!” She stood on the grass with them, waiting for the ride to slow down, but there was nothing slow about her enthusiasm as she watched. “Forget the horses, Dad, we can ride those anywhere. Do you see the rabbit?” She shrieked in excitement as the ride spun by. “And there’s an ostrich or something like that, and there’s a lion and a giraffe, and what are those, Dad?” She stepped closer until Jacob put a warning hand on her shoulder. “They’re not horses, are they?”

  “They’re mules,” Josie explained. “When my mom and dad brought us here, they were painted like zebras, but when the carousel went through a major overhaul, they realized the original artist had actually carved mules because mules helped build the Erie Canal. They’re pretty cool, right?”

  “So cool,” Addie declared. “I want to ride a mule first, and then maybe the ostrich bird, and then maybe a lion, or a horse, or that huge rabbit! Is that okay, Dad?” She peeked up at him quickly. “Do we have enough money for that?”

  “I really appreciate your asking. I think we’re good,” Jacob told her. “And you’re right, we don’t want to be greedy or expect too much.”

  “Because that would make God’s heart sad.” Addie shared a look with Jacob that said she understood. “I’ll try not to be greedy, Dad, but I love having fun!” She raced forward once the ride stopped, chose a mule, refused Jacob’s help and climbed on.

  “Here we go!”

  When Jacob stayed there, she shooed him away from her side before the ride started. “Dad.” She faced him at eye level, clearly taking charge. “Dads only ride with little kids who don’t know to hang on. I’m six.” Her frank expression said “I’ve got this,” and Josie was happy to see Jacob back off.

  “All right, then.”

  He stepped off and took a place at her side, watching, and when the back of his hand brushed hers, he folded her hand into his, nice and snug.

  She should pull away.

  She didn’t. She glanced down, then up.

  He was smiling, and he squeezed her hand lightly to let her know he caught the look, but kept his eyes on Addie. Then when the ride got started, he slanted a look her way. “My hand likes holding yours, Josie.”

  “Jacob.”

  “Shh.” He pressed her hand lightly again. “I don’t need reminders that this is all going to come to an end, but right now, it feels more right than anything’s felt in a long time. Except for her.” He dipped his head toward the carousel and waved with his free hand when Addie came around. “A guy. A girl. A cute kid and a day at the beach. Sounds like a handholding kind of moment to me. Wouldn’t you agree?”

  “If there’s a custard sundae at the end of all this, then I’m in.” She kept it light, when the last thing she wanted to do was keep it light.

  “Is Abbott’s as good as Stan’s?” he asked, and she winced on purpose.

  “Better. But I won’t ever tell Stan that, because he’s a pillar of the community. But whenever I get up into the suburbs near Rochester, I sneak over to Abbott’s Frozen Custard. It’s a thing.”

  The carousel paused. Addie scrambled off her mule and handed the ride operator more tickets once she perched on the rabbit, a hare in flight. She preened their way as parents moved kids on and off the brightly lit musical ride.

  Jacob gently squeezed Josie’s hand again. When she looked up, he wasn’t watching Addie.

  He was watching her.

  Her eyes. Her face. Her mouth. His gaze lingered there, and as the ride swept Addie away, he leaned down and touched his lips to hers, a feather-light kiss, just enough to make her wish for another. And then another, yet.

  She started to protest, but when he kissed her the second time, she didn’t want to protest. She wanted to melt, and maybe she did melt, just a little.

  He pulled back and smiled. “I couldn’t stop wondering, Josie. And couldn’t stop thinking about it.” He waved as Addie went by, then winked at Josie.

  “And now?”

  “I still won’t be able to stop thinking about it,” he mused, still smiling. “But for very different reasons.”

  “Jacob...”

  “I know. I know why it can’t possibly work because my job’s about to take me to the other end of the country.”

  He didn’t know all the reasons. He didn’t know the most important one of all, the one that would make him see her quite differently.

  She wanted to tell him. She wanted to clear the air, once and for all. A bright summer’s day was a perfect opening for that, but when she opened her mouth, he shushed her with one finger. “We don’t have to talk it to death right now, do we? Unless you have a major objection, let’s just enjoy the day. And then later we can fret over all the things grown-ups fret about. Right now, let’s just have fun with her. All right?”

  She should press, because she knew the secret she held, but she acquiesced.

  He was right. There would be fussing and fuming soon enough. For today, things were practically perfect, and she was going to allow herself to enjoy the moment. When regret came later, as she knew it would, she’d have this day to look back on and no one could ever take that away from her.

  * * *

  “I can’t wait to tell Memaw and Pawpaw about my great adventures!” Addie wriggled in the back seat as Jacob pulled the car into the employee parking behind the hotel. “Do you think Memaw is feeling better?”

  “She texted me that she was, but that she was going to bed early tonight and she’ll hear about your day tomorrow.”

  “Do I have to go to school tomorrow, Dad? For real?”

  He stood firm deliberately. Ginger had finagled her way around their parents with such finesse, it became impossible to stop when she grew older. He wasn’t going to tip Addie in a similar direction. “Yup. And the next day. And then you’re done for summer, so let’s not argue about it.”

  “But—”

  “Adeline Rose.”

  “Humph.” She slumped back into her seat, arms crossed. “We’re not doing anything in school, so I don’t know why I should go when Memaw and Pawpaw want to spend time with me.”

  “Fortunately, your grandparents also put great value on a solid education.”

  “It’s hard to let go of a fun day, isn’t it?” Josie’s soft-spoken empathy lightened the moment.

  Addie bobbed her head. “I just want it to keep going forever.”

  “But you know what would happen if it did?” Josie asked in the same quiet tone.

  Addie shook her head.

  “You’d get bored. Special never seems as special once it becomes everyday ordinary, and you’d wish for something else.”

  Addie frowned, unconvinced. “I don’t think that would happen.”

  “Well, what’s your favorite food at Christmas?”

  “Pawpaw’s apple pancakes!”

  “And do you think they’d taste as special at Christmas if you had them every single day?”

  Addie’s frown softened. “Like maybe I’d get tired of them?”

  “Like that, yes.”

  “I don’t know if I would,” Addie told her, then tried and failed to stifle a monster-size yawn. “But maybe it wouldn’t be so wonderful if you get it all the time.”

  “A lesson learned.”

  “But I wouldn’t mind trying to see!”

  Jacob laughed as Josie climbed out of the car on one side and he did the same on the other. “I expect
you’re going into the restaurant to check things out.”

  “I’ll finish the evening shift here, head home, and then we hit the ground running for the next couple of weeks. Are you ready for this grand opening, Jacob?”

  He’d come around the front of the car as she spoke. Now he faced her, wishing the day didn’t have to come to an end, much like his daughter. “I’m ready. This is ready.” He indicated the beautiful resort with a thrust of his head. “But I’m not ready for what comes later. The leaving part. And I’m not sure what to do about that, Josie.”

  She appeared to remain casual, but not before he spotted that now-familiar flash of regret. “Resign yourself because time has a way of marching on.” She moved back slightly. “And shouldn’t you have your résumés out there if you’re parting ways with Carrington?”

  “They’re out there. I’m just not certain I want to be out there with them. But you’re right, I’ve got to get her home to bed and tomorrow’s going to come early. Mom and Dad are taking over with Addie for the next two weeks because I know I’ll be listed as unavailable while we get things ironed out here. And then—”

  “Another chapter unfolds.” She leaned down and waved to Addie in the back seat. “See you later, sweet thing! Thanks for letting me tag along today!”

  “Bye, Josie! Thank you!”

  She didn’t turn back his way. She didn’t pause to flirt. True to her word, she kept a distance he wished he could broach, but unless he was willing to take a whole new turn in life, she was right to walk away.

  She disappeared into the Bayou Barbecue through the back entrance as Carly Moore, one of the young and very good-looking IT managers came his way. Carly’s swagger and short skirt said she wasn’t afraid to draw attention to herself, even in the workplace. “Jacob, got a quick minute to touch base on a few things?”

  “Just that long,” he replied. “Addie’s with me and I need to get her home.”

  Carly waved to Addie in the back seat before she began. “I wanted to let you know we should have everything running seamlessly on the security end and the Wi-Fi capabilities. The team and I have gone through the exercises, and it all looks good, but I’ll be on hand opening week in case we hit a glitch. Something about a thousand people using hundreds of devices simultaneously can mess things up. Was that Josie Gallagher you were with?”

  She sounded surprised, as if seeing him with Josie was unlikely, and that put an instant burr between his shoulder blades. “It was. Why?”

  “No reason.” She rolled one very shapely shoulder. “I just never figured you for the wild-child type. Of course, she’s calmed down now, I’m sure, but in our college days at Fredonia, we’re talking one busy, busy girl. If you get my drift.”

  He got her drift all right, and wanted to leap to Josie’s defense, then realized he could do that—and end up looking downright stupid because he had no idea what Josie was like a dozen years back.

  Did he care?

  He climbed into the car, thinking.

  No, not really. A lot of kids made stupid college mistakes, including him. But the words stuck in his craw...wild child.

  The thought of the strong, sensitive woman he was getting to know being a wild child seemed impossible on some levels, and not so much on others.

  She did her own thing. He liked that about her.

  She had a mind of her own, and stepped outside the norm. She’d built a great business on the premise of hard work and sacrifice, with no big Wharton degrees next to her name.

  Wild child.

  The brand irked him. Partially because of what it intimated, and partly—if he was honest with himself—because he was afraid it might be true.

  He got Addie home, showered and tucked into bed long before the late-June sun went down, and when she was asleep, his hand reached for the phone. He had people he could call. People who could check Josie out. Within a day, he’d know enough, but as his fingers brushed the phone, he pulled his hand away.

  He was thirty-six. She was in her early thirties. What did it matter if she’d messed up in college over a decade before?

  He wasn’t interested in the college-age Josie. He was falling for the woman he saw now—the beautiful, kind and faith-filled woman who seemed perfect with Addie, and maybe—just maybe—perfect for him.

  He left the phone alone, took his own shower and went to bed.

  Carly Moore was a top-notch IT person in the Central New York area. The team she brought on board planned their work and worked their plan, top flight.

  But he didn’t need her snippy innuendo or rolled shoulders to influence his choices. And unless he flipped his life upside down, his choices lay many miles south.

  But when he closed his eyes, it wasn’t job opportunities that crossed his mind as it used to be. It was a hazel-eyed, tawny-skinned woman with long, thick, dark hair. A woman who seemed at peace with God, his daughter and running a top-notch business. A woman with enough strength to be admired, and enough warmth to draw him closer.

  “As the lily among thorns, so is my love among the daughters.” The quote from the Song of Solomon tweaked him.

  Josie never spoke ill of others. She worked quietly and carefully, with a winning nature, but stood strong when things hadn’t gone her way.

  Wild child...

  The phrase irritated him, but what irked him more was that now that it had been spoken, he couldn’t get it out of his head, and that was the biggest bother of all.

  Chapter Eleven

  Josie saw the unfamiliar number in her phone and answered the call as she double-checked the smoker on grand opening morning.

  Excitement warred with nerves, and she was happy to be behind the scenes, controlling what she did best, the flow of great food at reasonable prices. She’d never planned on being part of a larger whole; she’d been fine on her own. But that all changed last winter, and here she was, part of the grand resort, a new beginning. “Josie Gallagher speaking.”

  “Miss Gallagher, this is Keshia Holmes from Sweet Hope Adoptions in Greenville.”

  No.

  She couldn’t do this now. She couldn’t reasonably listen to what Ms. Holmes had to say in the middle of opening-day crazy. “Ms. Holmes, this isn’t a good time. I’m at work and there’s no time to go into this right now.”

  “I assumed that, because you haven’t returned my calls or answered the phone when I used a marked agency phone.”

  “Ms. Holmes—”

  “I understand this is hard,” the woman pressed on. “The entire agency understands the difficulty in this most unfortunate turn of events, and we want you to know that while we assume no responsibility for the dishonest actions of others, we realize this situation has created an unforeseen predicament.”

  Unforeseen? Did she really just say that?

  Josie’s pulse sped up. “What you’re calling unforeseen was seen clearly by others. Relatives and friends. So I’m not sure your choice of words is accurate, Ms. Holmes.”

  “Of course the home study was done to our usual thorough standards, as was the county home study,” the woman continued.

  Rule number one: Don’t throw bad facts at a really mad mama. “Brewer County’s human services has been complaining about being underfunded and understaffed for a decade, and those are only the formal complaints I’ve been able to find online, so I don’t think your argument about the home study will prove satisfactory. It clearly wasn’t done well enough, and I’d have more respect for you if you simply admitted that. When the people in charge are willing to brush off ineptitude and/or misconduct, how can your clients have faith in the system? I put my trust in you to screen potential parents properly. Now I’m wondering if you didn’t just put out feelers for a socially acceptable appearance or for a couple who was willing to pay the highest price.”

  “Miss Gallagher, I assure you, that wasn’t the case and I�
�ve gone through the files personally.”

  Josie wanted to scream.

  She didn’t. She took a breath, thought about what Cruz had told her, and changed her tone. “Ms. Holmes, here’s the situation as I see it. Your agency didn’t do the job to the best of its ability. You can contest that, you can argue the point, but from our end, that’s a fact. You allowed a fraudulent couple to sneak through the system. Having said that, during our current conversation you’ve referred to this matter as a situation and a predicament.”

  Josie paused to take a deep breath. “It is neither,” she continued. “It is a precious child put into a situation that left her with no father, and an adoptive mother to pick up the pieces. An adoptive mother who kept up the charade of having a husband on hand while my daughter and I were undergoing liver transplants. Which means she didn’t want me investigating further all those years ago.”

  Josie took another deep breath. She wanted to punch someone. She wanted to go toe-to-toe with this woman and let her know how this whole thing felt from the birth mother’s perspective. That being lied to over something as perfectly wonderful as a child went way beyond a margin of error.

  It was a dagger, straight to the heart, because the one thing she’d tried to do right in the face of a grievous wrong was to ensure Addie’s place in a strong, nuclear family. “You’ve spoken with my lawyer. And I’m sure you’re busily assembling a legal team to ward off any bad publicity, but the first step is to admit you made a mistake. For the sake of children and mothers everywhere, I pray to God you can, at some point, manage at least that.”

  Shaken, she disconnected the call.

  She’d avoided the agency calls for the last several days on purpose because how was she supposed to concentrate on the massive job ahead of her, Addie and Jacob’s upcoming move and the waves of emotions sweeping over her daily?

  Addie’s placement wasn’t a predicament, and the child herself wasn’t a situation. She was a gift from God, and Sweet Hope hadn’t taken that as seriously as they should have.

  She needed to talk to her family, but there was no time for that today.