Catch Him if You can (Accidentally Yours)

by Jennifer Shirk

  Chapter Four

  Wade sprang awake the next morning when his four-year-old labradoodle began howling in his ear.

  He rolled over, scratching his dog’s head to calm her. “What’s the matter, girl?”

  Roxy began howling again. At the same time he heard pounding at his front door. “Wade, open up!” Arden called. “I know you’re in there.”

  Wade’s gaze rose to the ceiling. Can’t a guy get a day off in peace for once?

  Honestly, if it wasn’t his elderly neighbor offering him her newspaper at six a.m. or the women Judy Tavish had sicced on him who brought coffee and baked goods in the morning, then it was his dog who had recently decided that four a.m. was the appropriate and most perfect time to wake him up to go number two. Now it was a cheeky, unsympathetic wedding planner at his door.

  “Come on, Wade,” Arden whined. “I’m going to freeze to death.”

  Still annoyed at her for not being willing to help him with his matchmaking problems, he took his sweet time getting out of bed, leisurely putting on a pair of jeans, combing his hair with his fingers, and eventually strolling to the front of the house. Feeling extra evil, he stood at the door, hand on the knob, and counted to ten.

  When he finally opened the door, he couldn’t help but grin. Arden stood across from him looking like a strawberry-vanilla sundae—minus any and all sweetness. She was bundled up in a cream-colored parka with her long blond hair stuffed in a bright-pink beanie that matched the color of her cold cheeks and nose.

  She folded her arms and leveled a lethal blue gaze at him. “You’re the devil,” she told him before storming inside his house.

  He chuckled, then closed the door. Her usual feistiness was at an all-time high this morning. It had made it worth being woken up so early to witness. “Come now. Would the devil offer you coffee?”

  “Coffee?” She stopped blowing on her hands and looked up. “Really?”

  “Yes, Arden. Really. And might I point out that you woke me up, so who’s the real devil here?”

  With a small smile, she whipped a foil-wrapped rectangle out from under her arm. “Truce then,” she said, holding it out to him. “We can have this with the coffee. It’s chocolate chip banana bread.”

  He took it from her with some wariness. “You made this for me?”

  She shrugged out of her coat and tossed it on his sofa. He couldn’t help but stare. She wore a sky blue sweater that matched the color of her eyes and made her hair look like spun gold as it lay against her shoulder. Not that he was an extra observant kind of guy. He usually wasn’t. But it was hard not to notice little details about her when she seemed to freshen up his house like a summer breeze.

  As she turned back toward him, she bit her lip. “I didn’t make the banana bread. I found it on your doorstep. With a love note attached from Judy Tavish’s niece,” she said, pulling the note out of her pocket and holding it up for him to see.

  Love note? Wade shuddered. “See what I mean?”

  “Do you want to hear what it says?” she offered. “I didn’t mean to pry, but once I glanced at it, it was too juicy to stop reading.”

  “No,” he said through gritted teeth. “This is the kind of crap that has to stop.”

  However, his own adamant words did not prevent him from taking the loaf out of its foil and placing it onto a plate. He was starving and, although it pained him to admit it, the banana bread looked damn good. And actually…since he was being completely honest with himself…Arden looked damn good, too. But then again, she always looked good to him.

  His hands stilled from slicing the bread. Don’t go there, Wade.

  His gaze cut quickly to the woman in question, worried that she could somehow read his mind, but she was busy snuggling his dog. He cleared his throat and went over to his coffee machine. He obviously needed a good jolt of caffeine to defog his brain. True, Arden was a beautiful and desirable woman, but she was also his sister’s best friend. Kinsley would have his head carved and served on a platter if she suspected his thoughts pivoted in that direction for even a second.

  “Why are you here?” he said, more gruffly than he intended.

  Arden looked up with wide eyes. “Wow, somebody is a grumpy Gus today.”

  “Yeah? Well, being called a grumpy Gus isn’t making me feel any less grumpy.”

  Chuckling, Arden stood and walked over to the kitchen counter next to him, unaware that she smelled like shampoo and vanilla and about ten times better than the banana bread she was eyeing up. He stuck his nose in the can of coffee beans and inhaled as if they were smelling salts.

  She gave him a look that resembled you-need-serious-help and picked up a piece of bread. She brought it to her nose and sniffed as if trying to determine whether it was safe to eat or not. “I wouldn’t be here making you grumpy if you’d answer your phone. I tried calling you all day yesterday.”

  Wade made a face, then slid a cup of coffee in her direction. “Who calls anymore? You should have just texted me. That I would have responded to,” he said, shooting her a cocky grin.

  “It was an emergency, Wade. I needed to verbally talk to you.”

  “Well, you’re here now,” he said, taking a sip of his own coffee. “So verbally talk.”

  For the first time since he’d known her, Arden seemed nervous, which was odd. She’d always struck him as a self-assured at best and saucy at worst kind of woman. She placed the uneaten banana bread back down and began to wring her hands. “Something’s come up at work, and I need your help. Actually, I have a proposal for you.”

  One of his eyebrows shot up. “What kind of proposal?”

  “Not a kind of proposal.” She bit her lip. “An actual proposal.”

  “Arden, please,” he said, pinching the bridge of his nose, “it’s too early to make me follow the bread crumb trail. Just take me to Grandma’s house already.”

  She closed her eyes and, after letting out a huge rush of air, blurted, “I need you to pretend to be my fiancé.”

  After several seconds of stunned silence, she peeked open one eye.

  Wade scratched his head, still wondering if he’d heard right. “That’s kind of funny, because it really sounded a lot like you said you want me to be your fake fiancé.” When she only nodded in confirmation, he grew more confused. “Fiancé? But you just turned me down when I asked you to be my pretend girlfriend.”

  “I know. I’m so sorry and I’m sorry to spring this on you now, but you’re my only hope at this point. My career rides on me having a fiancé right now.”

  “Why?” he asked, surprised for the second time this morning. “That shouldn’t matter. You’re a wonderful wedding planner.”

  She chuckled, but there was little humor in it. “And how would you know that?”

  “Kinsley tells me all the time.” He shrugged a shoulder.

  Plus I have two eyes, he wanted to add. He’d seen a few of Arden’s weddings she’d planned at the Harbor Light Hotel, as well as the time and work she’d put into them.

  The Harbor Light had been in his family for quite a few decades until Wade was forced to sell. He’d contacted his old college roommate, Damon St. James, who agreed to buy the place. For more than one reason, Kinsley was not happy about it. But in working together to try to save the hotel, she and Damon had fallen in love and were now planning to be married there themselves in three months. Arden happened to be planning their wedding.

  Even if his own happily ever after was cut short, his sister deserved a chance at it.

  “I don’t understand what difference it makes if you’re married or engaged or whatever on how you do your job,” he said.

  Her shoulders slumped. “Normally, it wouldn’t make a difference, until I received that bad press a few months ago.”

  “The Bahamas Bolter?”

  “Yes,” she grumbled. “Anyway, it’s a long story, but these particular clients were hesitant to sign until I kind of sort of blurted that I was engaged.”

  Wade snor
ted. “Seriously? It’s not like my clients think I need to own a pet to be a good veterinarian.”

  “Exactly! Thank you.” She bit her lip. “Normally, I’d dismiss clientele who thought like that. However, they are pretty big clients, Wade. Huge. Huge enough that if all goes as planned, everyone will easily forget that wedding snafu I had a few months ago. I had no choice but to tell a teensy lie. And, well, since you had wanted me to pretend to be your girlfriend earlier, I figured…”

  “You figured I could be your fake fiancé.”

  “Yes. Will you?”

  “Uh, here’s the thing. I wanted a girlfriend,” he said, folding his arms. “I didn’t say anything about a fiancée.”

  “Oh, Wade, really?” She spluttered. “What’s the difference?”

  “What’s the difference? It adds a whole other element to the charade. And besides, don’t you think you’re moving a little fast in our fake relationship? I had no idea you were so pushy. Fake boyfriends don’t like to be—”

  “Okay, I get it!” She huffed. “So sorry I didn’t fulfill your time requirement to be fake courted properly, but like I said, this is an actual emergency.”

  He took a bite of banana bread and chewed, pretending to think it over. “I don’t know…”

  Arden planted her fists on her hips with a harrumph. “What don’t you know, Wade? Whether you actually missed out on the fake wooing or how unreasonable you’re acting right now?”

  “Now, now. A short temper is not something particularly attractive in a fake girlfriend slash fiancée.”

  “Well, maybe when a person’s career is in jeopardy and she asks a friend for help and gets turned down flat, she wouldn’t feel the urge to punch the fake boyfriend slash fiancé in the throat.”

  He wanted to grin but didn’t dare. It was rare to have the upper hand with Arden—and he found he was quite enjoying this sudden little nuance, along with her begging him for help.

  Again, wanting to slap himself for heading toward those kinds of thoughts for the second time this morning, he instead got to the important point of the negotiation. “What’s in it for me?”

  She dropped her hands, her eyes narrowing in thought. “Okay,” she said after a minute. “Here’s the deal. You get to tell Judy and the rest of the matchmaking seniors in town that you’re off the market. That’s a fair trade.”

  “Not good enough,” he told her.

  “Wait, hear me out. Being engaged is a way better scenario for you than just telling people we’re dating. Engaged means you’ve given your heart to another, so when we do finally ‘break up,’ people in town will know you’ll be crushed. If you play it right, those matchmakers won’t have the nerve to fix you up for years. As for me, being engaged wins me my dream client. Unfortunately, I’ll just have to inform her later on that the spark between us is gone, despite you begging me to take you back.”

  “Begging you?” He arched an eyebrow, folding his arms.

  “Yes. Begging. I might tell her I’ll consider taking you back, but that I must first concentrate on seeing her wedding to fruition.” She smiled a little. “Milena’s mother will love that, by the way.”

  He began to pace the room. It wasn’t a bad case she’d lain out before him, but if he really wanted Judy Tavish and the rest of the matchmaking maniacs to leave him alone, their lie would have to look as genuine as possible. He stopped at his front window and looked at his neighbor across the street. Right on schedule, Mrs. Rollins was picking up her morning paper and not too subtly checking out Arden’s car in the process, probably wondering how long it had been parked there and who it belonged to. He’d bet anything she would be picking up the phone and calling Judy as soon as she went back inside. Then maybe even calling Judy’s niece after that. He shuddered. Those women were a diabolical bunch.

  Wade turned back to her. “I need more of a commitment to this bit than you’re offering. It won’t be enough to just tell people we’re engaged. You haven’t experienced what those women are capable of. We need to make sure we’re seen together in town doing…couple-type stuff. It’s the only way they’ll back off.”

  To his surprise, Arden didn’t make a fuss about that. “Okay, I suppose that’s only fair, since I’m going to need you to attend a bridal consultation with me anyway.”

  He held up his opened hands. “Whoa, whoa, whoa. There you go again taking our relationship to the next level without consulting me first. I’m not fake planning a fake wedding with you. I draw the line there.”

  She punched him in the arm. “Not ours, ding-dong. My client’s bridal consultation. She’s bringing her fiancé and would like another man there so there’s no freak-out.”

  “Too late. I’m already freaked out.”

  She rolled her eyes, but something in Arden’s body language told him he’d hit a nerve. “Forget it. This won’t work. I obviously can’t even hold together a fake relationship.” She turned and walked over to the couch to pick up her coat. “Sorry I woke you,” she murmured.

  Suddenly feeling like an ass and more than a little desperate that he was going to lose her help with the merry matchmaking widows, he rushed over to stop her. “Hey, you can’t break up with me already,” he said lightly. “We haven’t even started fake dating yet.”

  Arden let out a deep sigh. “I don’t know if any of this is a good idea. I mean, look at what we’re about to do. Lying to my clients. Lying to the entire town. It screams desperation.”

  He took hold of her shoulders and squeezed. “That’s because we are desperate.”

  She smiled a little at that. “And we’re crazy?”

  Wade gently pried the coat from Arden’s hands and tossed it back on the sofa. “Look, the way I see it, we didn’t just come up with this plan out of the blue. We both were forced. We had no choice. If other people weren’t so crazy, we wouldn’t have to be as equally crazy. So, really, it’s their fault.”

  She arched a brow. “That’s the best logic you could come up with?”

  He grinned. “I haven’t had a full cup of coffee yet. Personally, considering that, and the time of day it is, I find it’s a pretty solid justification.”

  Arden stood there, looking as if she was turning the situation and his lame logic over and over again in her mind like a hamster wheel. “And it would just be temporary,” she added. “Right?”

  “Exactly. Two months,” he assured her. “Well, three months tops.”

  Her eyes widened. “Three?”

  “Yeah. We’ll break up right after Kinsley and Damon’s wedding. We’ll both need a date to that anyway, and this way our staged breakup won’t take away from their wedding.”

  She bit her lip. “Fine, but I break up with you.”

  “Why would you break up with me?”

  She arched an eyebrow. “Do you really need me to run down the list of reasons?” Before he could respond, she quickly raised an open hand. “But in all seriousness, it will work to your advantage if you’re the one left heartbroken. Maybe even still hoping that we get back together. If the matchmakers believe that’s the case, there’s nothing they’ll be able to do.”

  “Wow, that’s thorough,” he said with a new appreciation for her keen mind. “You’re very good.”

  She gave him a smug smile. “I know.”

  “Great. Then it’s a deal.”

  “There’s just one little issue,” she said, nibbling her bottom lip. “Kinsley. What do we tell her?”

  Kinsley.

  He’d almost forgotten. His sister was going to flip when she found out, and he certainly didn’t look forward to being the one who told her. But there was nothing to be done about it. He needed the town off his back. Besides, it wasn’t like he was actually engaged to Arden. “The less people who know, the less chance for a slipup or that information to get to the wrong ears. But she’s the one person we do tell the truth to. I vowed to Kinsley when she came back to Cape Harmony that we would never hold things back from each other, and I’m going to honor that.” />
  Arden’s shoulders visibly relaxed. “Okay. That will make it easier for me, too. I don’t want to lie to my best friend, either.”

  “See?” he said, slugging an arm around her shoulder and trying not to notice how nice her hair smelled. “This will be a piece of cake. Look how great we’re getting along already.”

  She glanced at her watch, then back up at him. “It’s only been fifteen minutes, Wade.”

  “Exactly.” He grinned. “The first fifteen minutes of any fake relationship is the hardest.”

  Arden looked doubtful. “If you say so.”

  “Arden, you need to chillax.”

  “Ugh. You saying chillax actually stresses me out. We’re not in high school, Wade.”

  She gave him a little pout, which turned his full attention to her lips. They were the color of cotton candy and for some reason he began to wonder if they’d taste just as sweet.

  Sweat suddenly pricked the back of his neck.

  No, we certainly aren’t in high school anymore.

  He never had thoughts like this about Arden back then, or if he had, he’d made sure to squelch them by teasing her before they overtook his actions. Otherwise, face the wrath of his sister.

  “Look, this will be a win win for both of us,” he told her. “You get to plan your dream client’s wedding and I stop being Cape Harmony’s bachelor charity case of the season. You’re worrying too much. What could possibly go wrong?”

  Arden seemed to think it over, then looked up and into his eyes with that stunning sky blue gaze of hers that had him swallowing hard. “You’re right, nothing can go wrong,” she agreed, giving him a dazzling smile that matched the effect of her gaze.

  Right. Wade blinked, and he made himself turn away from her pretty, smiling upturned face. He wasn’t sure why, but he had a weird suspicion that something had already gone just a little bit wrong.

  …

  A few days later, as Wade led his dog, Roxy, into work, he was relieved to find no female groupies waiting inside his clinic. No baked goods were left on his front porch and even the love notes via texts and postal mail had all but disappeared as well. So far so good.