The Beastly Groom (Texas Titan Romances)

by Cami Checketts

  Ema leaned back against the cushions and was impressed with his preventive measures. As intense as that kiss had been, she didn’t want to test her self-control. “So why don’t you go to church?”

  Knox studied her for long enough that she started to feel uncomfortable. “I …” He glanced at the painting above her head. “My mom was really strong in the faith. Really strict. When I went to college, I sort of rebelled and refused to go to church or pray or do anything that she would’ve expected of me. I didn’t party or sleep around, but I just needed a break from all the hellfire and damnation. My excuse was that I was busy with football and West Point is demanding.”

  Ema nodded, knowing some churches were like that, and certain West Point being demanding was an understatement.

  “But then she and Holly were killed, and a few years later, when I was deployed, Tyler and five other guys in my platoon were killed.” He still didn’t meet her gaze. “My dad turned to alcohol and prescription drugs. My buddy, Beau, turned to women. My sister, Sarah, put all her focus on her little boys. I was blessed with Shelby and I turned to God.”

  He finally looked at her then. “He gets me through every day, but I still don’t feel like I’m worthy to set foot in His house. Shelby goes to church with Genevieve and two of my security guys every week. She begs me to come.” He pulled in a breath. “I know that sounds pathetic and twisted.”

  Ema reached out and wrapped her hand around his. “It sounds really sad.”

  “I’m working with my pastor and a therapist. It helps.” His gaze focused on her. “I have PTSD, Ema. I don’t know that I’ll ever recover from it.”

  Ema clung to his fingers. Knox opening up to her was unexpected and touching. “I’d be surprised if you didn’t have PTSD after what you’ve been through.”

  He didn’t say anything, but he squeezed her hand.

  “Is that why the Beast comes out?”

  “It’s as good an excuse as any.” He leaned back against the hard chair and looked over her. “Tell me more about you.”

  “Nothing too exciting. I grew up in Kauai, huge family, lots of love. Came to school on the mainland and never wanted to leave.”

  “And how did you get into intruding on celebrities’ lives?”

  She should’ve been offended, but she laughed instead. “Most people like me coming around.”

  “Oh, I like you coming around. I just don’t like the world seeing me.”

  “The world would love you if you gave it a chance.”

  Knox shook his head quickly. “Have you even seen the Avenger movies? Nobody likes the Hulk.”

  “Natasha does.”

  He quirked an eyebrow.

  “Maybe the Hulk only likes redheads.” It came out too needy, like she was fishing for a compliment.

  “No.” Knox’s gaze traveled over her slowly, taking his time to appreciate her. “I’m pretty sure this Beast is partial to brunettes.”

  Ema smiled, relieved.

  He cleared his throat and looked away. Ema wondered if he’d ever been so intimate with a woman before. “You never said how you got your start.”

  “Oh. I had to take a year after college to do the whole Miss Hawaii gig and prepare for Miss America. I made some fabulous contacts during the pageant. Miss Wisconsin has been on Sterling Pennington movies. Miss Georgia is one of the famous Barington sisters. Miss California was engaged to Michael Jamison’s younger brother.”

  Knox nodded, acknowledging the famous basketball star.

  “My degree is in broadcast journalism and a reality show was the pipe dream, the real reason I did Miss Hawaii. When I came up with the idea for Live Like a Celeb and all the girls were so great about me using them or their connections, I got my first starts. Plus my dad had some famous friends from playing in the NFL and being the mayor of Kauai. So Mike and I started doing the show, editing it together and putting it up on YouTube until Amazon picked it up, then VH1, and it grew from there.”

  “That’s great. You’ve worked really hard.”

  That was an understatement; she’d given her life to her career, but she loved it. “So have you.” She glanced over his muscular frame, her eyes lingering on his biceps and the tattoos there. She reached up and traced the tattered flag on his right arm. She hadn’t noticed there was also a fleur-de-lis entwined with the flag. “Is this for the Army?”

  He nodded. “My whole squad got them.”

  She moved her hand to his left arm and pressed her fingers to the names tattooed there. “And these are?”

  “My brothers who died.”

  Sadness washed over her. Soldiers giving their lives for their country. It had always touched her deeply but never been quite so real as she studied the names on his bicep and then focused on the hollow pain in his deep brown eyes. His olive skin was so smooth and perfect, but there were scars that she could see on his face too.

  She trailed her fingers along a ridged scar above his eyebrow. “And the scars?”

  He leaned into her hand, closing his eyes. “Too many stories to tell.”

  “I want to hear every one.”

  Knox’s eyes flew open. “Someday.”

  Ema loved that promise. She trailed her fingers down his face and to his collarbone, where another scar decorated the smooth skin and muscle. “How many scars do you have?”

  He searched her face for a few beats, then grabbed the bottom of his shirt and ripped it off, tossing it on the floor. Ema drew back in surprise. Knox’s chest heaved with emotion as he pointed to the scars on his chest and shoulders. He was terrifyingly beautiful—so strong and beaten up, yet it was obvious he could take on any threat and come out the victor.

  “Too many to count,” he muttered.

  “Oh, Knox. You’ve given so much.”

  He took both of her hands in his and leaned forward in his chair. “Ema. When I kissed you, it wasn’t some casual thing. Do you understand why?”

  Ema’s heart thumped quicker and her throat swelled. “I can’t imagine you do anything casual, Knox.”

  “You’re right.” He pushed out a long breath. “I’ve lost so many people I’ve loved. I shut myself off from everyone but Shelby and my family. I know you don’t know me very well, but if I let you in and you …” He released her hands and sprung to his feet, pacing next to her bed. He stopped and looked down at her. “I’m going too fast and I’m not making any sense. I’m sorry.” He shook his head and started for the door.

  Ema sprung up out of bed and put too much pressure on her hurt ankle. She cried out in pain.

  Knox whipped around and rushed back to her side. He steadied her with his hands on both of her elbows. “Ema. No.” It rushed out in a groan. “Now I’ve hurt you.”

  “Knox, stop it. You haven’t hurt me.”

  He stared down at her, brooding and concerned.

  Ema arched up onto tiptoes and gave him a quick kiss. She lowered back down to her heels and stared at his surprised face. “It’s okay, big guy,” she said, trying to tease him out of his worry.

  Knox shook his head, not smiling like he usually did when she attempted to imitate Natasha soothing the Hulk. Swooping her off her feet, he carried her back to the bed. He settled her flat onto her back on the bed, laying down next to her. His chest lowered on top of hers and he kissed her. His mouth took complete control. Ema sucked in a surprised breath, but then she was lost in the depth of his kiss. The only thing she could focus on was Knox as he kissed her and kissed her, desire and fulfillment swirling around them like shooting sparks in some Disney movie.

  He pulled back and his chest heaved in and out, but his eyes were not moving at all as he focused on her. Ema rested against the pillows, out of breath and wanting more.

  “Can you stay with us, Ema?” he asked in a rough whisper.

  Ema’s head shot off the pillow. She scooted out from under him and back against the headboard. Stay with them? Yes! But then no, no, no. “I … Knox, you have to understand how hard I’ve worked to get to
where I’m at with my show.”

  He studied her, then pushed off the bed and stood, glowering over her. As he jammed a hand through his hair, the muscles in his chest and shoulder flexed, and it was all she could do to resist touching him. He finally muttered, “I’m an idiot.”

  “No, Knox—” Ema tried to stand.

  He held out a hand as if demanding her not to come after him again. “It’s fine, Ema. It’s all on me. I’m too intense and demanding, and of course you wouldn’t give up your career for someone you’ve known for four days.” He turned and strode from the room, not bothering to shut the door behind him.

  Ema wanted to chase after him, but he was right, and the truth of his words immobilized her. No one would give up years of hard work and dreams and sacrifice for someone they’d known for a few days.

  She bent over and plucked his shirt off the floor. It was soft and smelled exactly like the man she was falling for. She touched the shirt to her lips, imagining the passion and sweetness of his kiss. Knox was no beast. In fact, he was perfect for her, if only he didn’t demand so much. With anyone else there might be a possibility of focusing on her career and slowly developing a relationship where they saw each other occasionally, texted, talked on the phone. Casual and easy and non-demanding. That would never work with Knox. He definitely didn’t do casual.

  Chapter Ten

  Knox gave up on sleep around four a.m. He crept into Shelby’s room and studied his daughter in the dim light from the hallway. She always slept curled up onto one side, hugging the pink stuffed bear Tyler had bought when he found out Paris was having a girl. They’d been stationed in Afghanistan and Knox could still remember how happy Tyler was, even though Paris had recently been caught cheating on him with multiple men and broken his heart.

  Tyler must’ve had intuition that he would be killed soon. Knox had hated it when Tyler implied that he wouldn’t be going home. His friend spent hours on the phone and emailing lawyers, finalizing his divorce from Paris, setting everything up to give Knox all his money and custody of his unborn child. When Shelby was born, Tyler had been gone for two months and Knox had taken an early retirement from the Army. Paris had no trouble signing the paperwork to give Knox her daughter in exchange for an insane amount of money. She left the hospital two days later without even visiting the nursery on her way out the door.

  Knox pushed out a breath, so grateful Paris and Tyler had given him this gift. Paris had tried to come around a few times to exploit Knox and Shelby for more followers on Instagram. Knox had been able to shield Shelby from her mother so far. He hoped Tyler could watch them from above.

  Knox leaned forward and softly kissed Shelby’s cheek, inhaling the sweetness of baby lotion. Padding out of Shelby’s suite, he hurried down the stairs to his gym. He studiously avoided going anywhere near Ema’s room, though he did notice her door was still open. What did that mean? An invitation for him to check on her while she slept? Fire raced through him. He rushed down the hallway to his gym and took several long drinks of water from the water cooler before he started warming up on the treadmill.

  His legs felt like they were full of sludge, and he was having trouble regulating his breathing. What was wrong with him? A woman hadn’t affected him in a long time. Ema had stolen his heart quickly and completely, and then admitted her career came first. Not that he blamed her—he was grateful for her honesty. She’d worked hard, and just because he was so invested in her didn’t mean she had to return the favor. He shouldn’t have asked her to stay. He should’ve asked her to date him, to take it slow. He scowled. He hated slow.

  For Ema, he’d take what he could get. His mind churned out ideas to make a relationship between them work and instantaneously rejected them as he went through sprint sets on the treadmill and then started lifting on shoulders and lats. By seven a.m., he was sweaty, exhausted, and his body was wishing it could crawl back into bed, but his mind had come up with an idea that might work. If only Ema would agree.

  Draining a bunch of water, he grabbed a pre-made protein shake out of the mini-fridge and downed it, then sprinted up the stairs to his suite. He didn’t want to be sweaty when he presented his plan. Hurrying through his shower and brushing his teeth, he sprayed some cologne and studied himself in the mirror. Was he nuts? What if Ema’s career was simply an excuse? Maybe she had no desire to be serious with him. He took a long breath. He’d been brave in the military more times than he could count. He was brave to basically raise a daughter by himself. He was brave on the football field. He could be brave when facing the most intriguing woman he’d ever met.

  Forcing himself to march out of his bathroom, he checked on Shelby. Usually he loved when she awoke early and wandered over to his workout room to play close by, but today he was relieved she was asleep and he could talk to Ema before breakfast. He might explode if he waited. He called Genevieve, and she was happy to come sit in Shelby’s room and stay with her for as long as he needed. He didn’t tell his adopted aunt much, but he could tell she was dying to know the details. Maybe he’d have good news soon, but then maybe not.

  Bounding down the stairs, he arrived at Ema’s door only to find it was now shut. Crap. He knocked quietly and waited. No response. Knocking again, he sent up a quick prayer to the good Lord, his mama, his sister, and Tyler. He needed all their help right now.

  Quiet footsteps approached and then Ema swung the door open. She was in a white tank top and black workout capris. Knox swayed, overwhelmed by not only how gorgeous she was with her dark skin and hair contrasting with the white material of her shirt and the sleek muscles of her shoulders and arms being revealed, but by how hard he’d fallen for her. Even as he steadied himself, though, peace and warmth filled him. It was quick and insane, but it was right.

  “Good morning,” he said in a breathy rush.

  Ema smiled up at him. “Is it?”

  “I sure hope so.”

  Her smile grew, but her eyes were apprehensive. “I was just going to go for a walk around your property. Is that okay?”

  “Of course.” But instead of stepping back and letting her go, he moved closer. “Could I come with you?”

  She searched his face and his pulse quickened. She was going to say no. Then Shelby would wake up and they wouldn’t be alone until late tonight, and then what if Ema was feeling better and she left him today? Was she feeling better? This woman made his brain spin.

  “Should you be walking? How’s your head and your ankle?”

  She grinned. “I’m okay.”

  Knox was happy she was okay, but terrified that meant she was leaving him, moving on to her next show. He didn’t even care what they aired about him anymore. He didn’t even care about the Wheaties box. He only wanted to tell Ema his plan, lay bare his heart, and then pray all of his angels and the Lord would convince her to give him a chance.

  “I’ll walk slow.” She winked.

  “And I’m definitely coming with you.”

  “Big Mr. Demanding,” she teased.

  Knox grinned. He called Shelby Little Miss Demanding, and he liked that Ema had picked up on it. He offered his hand. “Shall we?”

  Ema looked down at his hand, then up at him. Was holding hands too much like a couple for her? Did that mean she didn’t want to be a couple with him? Finally, she placed her palm against his. He wrapped his fingers around hers and peace settled over him. This was right. She was right. He’d waited a long time to find the right woman, and now he simply had to be patient and make it work. He hated patience.

  They walked down the stairs and outside without saying anything. They walked past the horses and barns and angled toward the lake. Knox’s heart was pounding so fast, he didn’t know if he could get a word out. They reached the lake and their steps slowed as they ambled along the bank. Knox wanted to stop and face her as he opened the floodgates to her, but he wasn’t that brave.

  “Ema,” he ventured. “I had some ideas this morning.”

  “Okay.” Her voice didn’t g
ive anything away, but she squeezed his hand and that gave him a shot of courage.

  “I think you’re amazing, all that you’ve accomplished, and I would never want to take away from your career.”

  “Thank you,” she said.

  “But I still want to get to know you better, date you. I want to be with you.” The words rushed out, and with them went his courage.

  Ema stopped, and he would rather have kept walking than face her right now, but he turned to her and glanced down. The morning sun made her dark hair sparkle. Her eyes were interested, he thought. “Knox, I don’t think you can do a casual relationship, and I travel. Every week I’m in a different spot. I don’t see how we can grow a relationship—”

  “I know, but I have an idea.” He took in a breath and said quickly, “I have my own jet and pilot. What if when you need to fly to different states, he takes you there for the two or three days that you’re filming and then he brings you back to Dallas? To me?”

  Ema’s eyes widened. “You’re pretty serious about dating me.”

  “Yeah, I am.” He swallowed and continued, “I also know a lot of famous people right here in Texas. Would you be opposed to filming as many of them as you feel is beneficial for your show, and then you wouldn’t have to travel at all for a while?”

  Ema released his hand and took a step back. She looked torn, uncertain, and it ripped at Knox. He wasn’t demanding a lifelong commitment, just a chance to date. Was he being too strong? No, dang it, he wanted her and this was right. He knew it.

  “The next few months are already scheduled out,” she stated.

  “Okay, that’s okay. You can fly back and forth. It’s so much easier with your own jet, not going through security, waiting for the flight, layovers. And Shelby and I can come with you sometimes.” He lit up at the idea. He could watch her work, be right there. He could show her that he had some social skills and wasn’t a complete beast. With Ema and Shelby next to him, he could probably even be friendly with people, as long as they kept Shelby off the camera.