Louis, Molly & the Woodchuck

by Michael Arnold

Chapter 4

  The destruction that Edna saw in her yard was almost as bad as the pain she felt in her neck. She examined the chain from the top of the hill that led down to her back yard. She felt deep down in her dark and callous heart that what she saw out there in her yard was something more, something a little more sophisticated. She didn’t want to jump to conclusion too soon, or make the situation worse than what it really was. If she didn’t keep a cool head about it all, it would make it harder to solve the mystery of what happen in her house and yard while she was away.

  I want to keep this as simple as possible. If I do that than just maybe I will be able to piece this puzzle together and they will help me find that mangy mutt and that pesky little rat, Edna thought. She walked down the hill to the back of her yard where Louis had been held captive, picked up the broken chain and held it in her man-size hands.

  “He must have found a way to bite through the chain. I should have been smart enough to buy a better chain than this rusty one, God Blame it!” she yelled, dropping the chain and kicking at it, almost losing her balance. But she managed to grab hold of the broken down dog house in which Louis used to live to steady herself. When Edna realized that she wouldn’t find any answer in her backyard, she walked back up the hill and inside her house.

  “This is a mess. How in the world did this happen? If only I could get my hands around the neck of that God Blame dog and that rat. Where are you dog and rat? Are you working as a team and are you going to try coming in to cause me more trouble later on while I’m sleep?” she said aloud.

  The footprints didn’t give her any clue that Louis and the woodchuck were around or any idea where they could possibly be. But it made her realize that she couldn’t get around until she cleaned that muddy floor and picked up all the food scraps from around the kitchen.

  It wasn’t until she began cleaning her house that something came to her Louis-hating mind, something that made her evil grin turned into a pleasant smile. “Son of a gun, I will put out some flyer and asked people if they’ve seen that pesky little rat and that mutt. And when I will get Louis back I will do to him what he has done to me. He will feel my misery and my pain,” she yelled.

  “Flyer it is. I will find you, Louis!” Edna felt so happy that she decided to demonstrate her excitement. All of her two-hundred-and-twenty-five-pound body leaped up in the air, her arms spread like an eagle and she shouted, “I should have thought of that before!” When she came down, she didn’t come down on her feet as she expected, but on her butt.

  Molly was coming to when she heard, “Hi, you pretty thing, you are finally awake?” Not knowing for sure if what she heard was reality, she didn’t open her eyes and laid in her cage, in her new home, and decided she was going to be unconscious to the Hi you pretty thing you are finally awake? But when she heard the noise of the other cats in the facility, she woke up and stood up on her feet.”

  “It’s okay; there is no need to be frightened. My name is Kelly and I am a facility worker here at the shelter.” Kelly stood in front of Molly’s 6 by 6 cage and looked at her. “Where is my family, Elvin and Fannie? I want you to take me back to them. What did you do with them?” Molly said as she began to panic. She walked backwards until she had retreated to the left corner of her cage.

  “No need to run away. I want to be your friend, Molly. Elvin and Fannie told me so much about you. I am sure everyone is going to love you here,” Kelly said.

  “I wouldn’t spend my time talking to that cat. There are more coming in just a few seconds. We put them in their cages, leave them there and let them adapt to their new surroundings. They are cats not dogs!”

  “Molly, don’t pay any attention to Pete. He is the third shift associate. He does the same thing I do,” Kelly said. “I think he is a little upset because he has to work over. That’s what we do here; work over, because some have things they have to do and some call-in sick.” Kelly wanted to take the last word back but she realized that she had already said it and according to the Dalton’s, Molly was a very smart cat and could pick up things.”

  “Molly, I have some work that I have to do, but I promise I will be back to check on you,” Kelly said.

  When she got out of Molly’s presence she felt what is normal for human beings to feel when they have made a mistake. That mistake was to pronounce the word “sick” in front of Molly.

  How could I be so stupid to mention that word around her? Molly is sick and then I have to go and remind her. Come on, Kelly, that wasn’t very smart of you, she thought before walking into her office.

  “I hope Fannie comes back and get me. I miss Fannie. She was so nice to me. I really want to go home. This place seems really, really scary,” Molly said from the corner in which she was most comfortable.

  During the hour in which Molly was wide awake, she saw several dogs and cats being brought into the facility. Of course this scared her. She remained in the corner of her cage until all the traffic through the hall was clear, then she walked slowly from the corner to the front of her cage.

  “You must be new here,” a cat twice her size and weight with a lot of gray hair in its coat said from across the hall. Molly didn’t respond. She just looked toward his cage. “What you in for, yongen?”

  Molly refused to speak to a dog on the left of her, and the cat on the right of her was asleep. When she glanced over into their cages she noticed that their food bowls were full.

  “You’re either in here because your parents were just flat out honest with you that they can’t afford to take care of you any longer, saying that old familiar phrase: we’re cutting back on bills, and guess what bill they start cutting first?” the cat asked.

  “The darn pet bill,” a dog yelled a couple of cages down.

  “That’s right, you said they start cutting with us but the lucky part is you get to meet another family until they get tired of you then it’s back to this metal box again!” the cat yelled. “Or it could be reason number two, you’re sick to the point of death and your custodial parents don’t want that long and enduring grief, so they bring you here to wait, suffer then die. And if we are in too much pain we are taken behind the gray door immediately, where we die, where there is no more of our existence. We are wiped clean from this world just like that.”

  “Oh my, that is so terrible and bad. Why would they bring me to such a place as this?” Molly yelled, running back to her corner.

  “Well, what do you know the young girl can talk? By the way, my name is Russell and you are?”

  Molly didn’t reply; instead she shrank further into the corner of her cage.

  “Look, this happen with all new comers. They find out about the gray door and they freak out. It’s nothing. Trust me; it’s nothing it’s…”

  “It’s something. It’s bad, Russell. They are killers, murderers here,” Molly interrupted.

  “What do you know, she talks again!”

  “Killing is wrong and if there is a gray door somewhere in here, it needs to be destroyed,” Molly replied.

  Russell laughed, and now he was up and limping to the front of his cage. “You may not see me again because I am on my last leg, literally. I’m dying. The only reason I haven’t been to the gray door yet is because they haven’t got to me on the list. That old fat cat with the shedding gray hair and a bum back leg, that’s me. I will be called sooner than later,” he said.

  “I lived for a lot of years on this planet and I haven’t amounted to anything, going from house to house, fighting with dogs, raccoons, other cats and any animal that I can pick a fight with and they would fight me back. Well, I picked a fight with the wrong dog on the wrong day two weeks ago and got bitten badly by a mean pit bull. They don’t play. I am a living witness. Well, the pit bull tore a hole in my leg and they brought me here. This place done all they could do but at the end of all of this, my leg still got infected and for some odd reason they can’t stop the infection from moving up my leg. They believe that the infection will
eventually move to my heart. But before it gets to my heart, I will be behind that gray door, embracing it like it was tuna.”

  Molly swallowed hard.

  “I will be in a lot of pain when my medicine wears off, but at this time I am okay and it’s okay to feel okay,” Russell said with a smile.

  “But once I have taken my last dose of prescription medicine and, by the way, it’s the best. It’s like, it’s like you are in heaven,” Russell added.

  “Anyhow, once that is the last of my medicine, I, too, will have my time behind that gray door. We all may have fear of it somewhere down that road, but for now, you are young, vibrant, and full of life. It scares you right now, but for me the gray door is my best friend. It will take me out of my misery and escort me into a place where I will never, ever have to worry about pain and suffering again. We all will go behind that gray door one day, maybe not the one here in this facility, but each one of us have a gray door in our future.”

  Russell held his head down peering at the gray that appeared in the hair that covered his paws then looked back up at Molly. Her big blue eyes shed the tears that were a buildup of hurt from being separated from Elvin and Fannie. But most of all, when she saw Russell hobble back away from the front of his cage, she couldn’t help but let those tears fall. Meanwhile, one of the associates, who did not introduce himself to any of the animals, like Kelly did, placed a bowl of dog food in Russell’s cage.

  “You should eat all of that food, Russell. It’s going to build your strength and where you’re going, you’re going to need all the strength you can get!” the associate said.

  “And if I was in my younger years and out of this cage, I would tear you from limp to limp, boy,” Russell said, his words coming out in a gruff growl. The associate didn’t care about Russell or his growl. He walked away as if he had somewhere to be. Molly gazed at Russell from a distance. She saw his limp, his pain when he stretched himself out in a laying position. She walked to the front of her cage.

  “Are you okay, Russell?”

  “Who, me? Awh yeah. I’m fine. If you’re saying that because of what he said, that’s nothing. Try being tossed in the trash can by someone who gave you food and water for eight months? One day he gets drunk and then he wants to screw around with the cat. So, not only am I in this horrible place called a trash can, but I’m being tossed in front of a moving truck. Never mind me. I heard the next door neighbor say to someone, “Get that trash can, it’s brand new.” So my life here is great! Well, I’m going to get some shut eye. I’ve been up the last couple of nights when I should have been asleep. There’s a lady a couple of cages down that I would like to chat with, and…” Russell paused. “Maybe we can talk when I wake up and then maybe you could tell me your name, kid.” Russell then laid his head down on the floor of his cage.

  “I’m Molly; my name is Molly, Russell.”

  “Good name, Molly. We shall talk when I wake.”

  Molly stared through her cage. She felt sorry for Russell but she felt sorry for herself even more. “What is going to happen next? I want to go back home.”

  The pain in Edna’s neck aggravated her so that she thought a second trip to see Dr. Andy wouldn’t be bad. But her job was half done. She had the proofs for her flyers but she needed them printed out into the actual flyers. “Going to see Dr. Andy will just have to wait. I have to get these flyers out. I am sure someone has seen him and if I go to see Doctor Andy now I risk losing time, and I need time. Louis hasn’t been gone that long and I should have him back by nightfall,” Edna said, glancing at the proof.

  “Now then, that looks splendid. I know the perfect place that will make me the perfect flyers,” Edna said. Her dark, sullen grin went with her then turned into a fake smile when she pulled into Walmart’s parking lot. She walked with the grace of a show dog after she parked, taking up part of a second parking space, and the anger of a person whose parking space had just been taken.

  “I think if you want people to even stop and take a look at this flyer, it has to be different, it has to be original!”

  “What do you mean original? It’s just a flyer.”

  “All I want is a picture of my dog with my telephone number stamped somewhere on it, so people can call, so I can get my dog back. What’s so hard about that, Roscoe?” Edna said when she read the kid’s name tag.

  “My name is Robert, but hey, if you want to call me Roscoe, I am all for it. Besides, I been called worse,” Robert said, showing a mouth full of metal braces when he smiled. “What I am saying is that if your dog is really that important to you, and you want to find him, I mean you want people to find him, don’t you?”

  “Of course I want people to find him. That’s why I’m here,” Edna said in a calm but forceful voice.

  “Okay. To get your dog back, Miss, a picture with you hugging, kissing, washing him or something like that, would make a better picture on the flyer than just a picture of your dog and a telephone number on it. The flyer needs to be original as possible; just like your neck brace. And from the looks of it, you must really love dogs,” Robert said.

  Edna rolled her eyes. “I would say that I love my dog, yes, but a lover of dogs personally, no, I wouldn’t say that, Robert. Can we get on with this? I have a lot of things I must get done before tonight, like getting those flyers up. So what do we need to do?”

  “Okay, first things first. I need a picture of you and your dog.”

  The entire process took about two hours, since Edna had to go home to find a picture of Louis and a more recent one of herself. Once that was done, the process of cropping those pictures and photo-shopping began.

  That evening Edna had two hundred plus fliers in her hands, with her and Louis hugging like one would with their pets, thanks to photo shop. Edna felt totally different, despite the picture. Of course, she didn’t like Louis. She never did. It didn’t just show how she treated him the day the woodchuck freed him, but how she treated him until the day he was freed, when she saw him with what she called “that rat” in her house. To see her embrace Louis hurt her in every way, just as the constant hurt she felt in her neck. The flier was just a stepping stone to her bigger plan towards what she really wanted.

  Edna was torn inside, because of what she had told people about that darn mutt. She said he was “her baby”.

  “If I don’t get him back, I don’t know what I would do. He is such a big part of my family. Losing him is like losing your own child,” she told one lady who was with her young son.

  “I am so sorry, we don’t have a dog or a cat, but I can feel your pain. If I was to lose little Johnny, I would be devastated.”

  “I hate dogs. I hate cats, too. And I am going to run over your dog with my mom’s car if I see him!”

  “Johnny, you owe her an apology. He loves to play around. He is only eight years old. It’s something about him and animals he hates. Anyway, I will keep my eye open. If I happen to see your dog, I will try to get him, but I will notify you as soon as I see him,” the lady with the child said.

  When they moved on, Edna smiled and thought: Little boy, I may have to find you soon and when I’m done with him, then I will give you the honors of running Louis over with your mother’s car.

  Edna ended her evening posting those flyers of hers on trees and telephone poles, and then drank a tall glass of hot chocolate while watching Family Guy.

  Edna felt hopeful. He isn’t far away. He won’t make it out there in that night air. He will either come back here or he will…. She paused when something came to her mind, something that made more sense than posting her fliers on every pole and tree in the city. “Why didn’t I think of this before?” she said to herself. She then grabbed her cell phone and a telephone book. “Ah-ah, I found it!” She slammed the phone book shut and quickly dialed the ten digit number.

  “Charlotte Humane Animal Shelter; this is Kelly speaking. Would you like to adopt a cat or a dog this evening?”

  Night had f
allen when Louis and the woodchuck made their way out of the fox hole and back toward where Louis stole the grapes.

  “I don’t know about you, Louis, but I’m full. I ate like a king in there. Those have got to be the finest group of foxes that anyone would want to meet. They are simply the best, Louis. They gave me all the grape cream pie that I could stand. I mean I would put one away then the woman, ummm… I think her name is Foxy Paw. She is White Paws wife. Anyway, when I got to the third pie, and I saw all that cream running down the side, I wanted to pass on it, but I couldn’t. I had to find out what was it about that particular pie that made that cream run down the side. It didn’t do it with the other two pies that I ate before the third one.”

  Louis didn’t say anything. He looked forward while the woodchuck continued his tirade.

  “And, oh I can’t forget about the cool scarf that Foxy Paw gave me. Man, they are some great foxes.” His voice was somewhat hesitant, but the woodchuck walked on his hind legs and continued to keep pace with the unresponsive Louis.

  “I was just thinking, Louis, what a lake of water and fox shampoo can do to a dog. Man you look good, I feel … feel like I don’t have to walk at a distance. Now, word to the wise, Louis, try to keep yourself clean this time. Am I talking to the ground here? At least say screw you, Woodchuck, or I like the food, I like your scarf. What happened? You lost the knowledge to talk or something when you got a bath?”

  “Just thinking, Woodchuck. A dog can’t think?” Louis replied.

  “Well, yeah a dog can think, but can you at least think out loud, so a woodchuck knows what’s going on.”

  “What’s going on is that we are going to get some rest. Today has really been a busy day. I’m tired. I want to have my strength at full capacity when I wake in the morning. Tomorrow is of the essence, so sleeping is a must, for me at least, Woodchuck,” Louis said.

  “Louis, I don’t like the way you’re speaking to me, if you want to know my opinion?”

  “Actually I don’t, Woodchuck.”

  “Well, too bad, you’re going to get it anyway. I don’t like your terminology, Louis.”

  “Why not, Woodchuck? I’m being honest. You know what honest is, don’t you? Well, then again you stole from your friends, so I take it that you don’t know what honest is. I’m sorry for thinking more highly of you, Woodchuck,” Louis said, walking past the woodchuck who had stopped and watched as Louis kept on moving.

  “Oh so that’s how you want to play? You are a dirty dog, and that was a low blow, but I can fire back. But I will let this one slide, although if I was a policeman, I would be arresting you for breaking and entering and being a thief, Louis. But I won’t mention it, nor will I mention that before we made that little truce with the foxes, which I was very happy with, I’m not complaining, but you, you, Louis, took something that didn’t belong to you. The grapes, you stole grapes, so if I don’t know about honesty, I guess you need to include yourself as well, Louis. And don’t give me the crap about it that you did it for me. No, it just wasn’t for me, Louis; you had your hand in the cookie jar too, thief.”

  Louis said nothing. He kept moving.

  “So as I was saying, moving the topic of discussion back to you, your terminology, in the last few minutes of our journey to nowhere, has sickened me, Louis. You want to know why?” the woodchuck asked.

  “No, I don’t.” Louis replied.

  “Well, I am going to tell you anyway.”

  “Yeah, I figured that.”

  “You throwing out words and statements that I don’t understand like ‘full capacity’ and ‘of the essence’ and then your last bit of words, I understood perfectly well, because it was a indirect punch toward me,” the woodchuck said.

  “And what was that, Woodchuck?” Louis asked, exhaustion in his voice.

  “Glad you asked, Louis. So I’m going to tell you. Your last bit of wording was ‘sleeping is a must for me at least’. So, I don’t sleep or something, Louis, is that what you’re trying to say?”

  “Just let it go, Woodchuck, alright? I’m too tired to battle with you right now.”

  “If I wasn’t afraid of laying you out right now, Louis, I would give you a two piece right square in your black button nose,” the woodchuck said.

  “Oh you would?”

  “Yes, I would. When I was coming up, when I was a little younger one, things that you don’t know which you need to know just in case you cross me, Louis, is they mistaken me for Muhammad Ali!”

  Louis busted out in a laugh.

  “Oh it’s true, Louis. One punch it was over. You heard the saying: I float like a firefly and I sting like yellow jacket!” The woodchuck held his arms in a fighting stance and rotated close-fisted back and forth.

  “You have it all wrong, Woodchuck. It was “I float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.” That’s what Ali said.”

  “Well, you get the picture. Change your phraseology, so I can articulate my retort to you, Louis. When we engage in conversation, I need you to speak, so I can get an understanding, not this extraneous language of yours.”

  Louis glanced down at him then shook his head. “What I am just saying; I can speak my mind, can’t I?”

  An hour later, Louis and the woodchuck came to a shopping center. Most of the people they saw were going to their vehicles, as the evening was drawing close.

  “Where are we? And what is this place, Louis?”

  “It’s a shopping center. It’s where humans go to shop and carry on with their everyday activities.”

  “Like what? I have never been this far into the city. This is new to me,” the woodchuck replied with a dismal glare on his face.

  “They buy things, Woodchuck.”

  “I don’t get it. Correct me if I’m wrong. Here we are, not human, so and again why are we here?” the woodchuck said.

  “We are going to do what you do best, Woodchuck?”

  “And what is that?”

  “We are going to steal. How does that sound, Woodchuck?”