Hope Rekindled

by Tracie Peterson

  “How can you—” she started, but Christopher put his finger to her lips.

  “Nothing equals the love I feel for you. I’m sorry I ever acted in a way that suggested otherwise.”

  It wasn’t easy to remind herself that she’d been the one who’d had misgivings about their love—all based upon her fear of how children might interfere with her plans. What a fool she’d been.

  “I love you, Deborah. I want you to be my wife—to share my life,” he said, tracing the line of her jaw.

  “I want that more than anything,” she replied, finally knowing that it was the absolute truth. “I love you, too. I guess we’ve both allowed our fears to cast a shadow on our love. Oh, Christopher, I am so sorry for the way I’ve behaved.”

  He kissed her with such tenderness that Deborah felt light-headed and swayed in his arms. Perhaps it was just the heat, but there was no denying this man had power over her.

  “Mama Euphanel, can I have another piece of chocolate cake?” Emma asked.

  Jonah nodded in a most enthusiastic manner. “Me too, Mama Yoonell. With lots of gravy on top.”

  “It’s not gravy,” Emma corrected. “It’s toffee sauce. And her name is Yoo-fan-el—Mama Euphanel.”

  Mother looked at the children and then to Christopher. “I . . . uh . . . I don’t know what to say. I never . . .” She stammered into silence and a dark shade of crimson flooded her cheeks.

  Deborah thought it charming that Emma had addressed her in such a manner, but she could understand her mother’s surprise. Christopher, too, seemed to understand.

  “I would suggest just a little piece—perhaps they could share another piece of cake.” He gave Mother a wink. “That way, Mama Euphanel, I can have another whole piece to myself.”

  “Me too,” Jimmy chimed in.

  “Well, you don’t get it all,” Tommy declared. “I want more, too.”

  It was wonderful how easily the situation resolved itself. Mother got up without another word and brought the cake plate into the dining room. She began slicing additional helpings while the others passed their plates to her.

  Deborah reached over to squeeze Christopher’s hand, but got his thigh instead.

  “What!” he fairly yelled, and gave a start as if he’d sat on a hot coal. The plate he was planning to hand to Mother was all but thrown into the air.

  Deborah nearly upended her chair in backing away. Now everyone turned to look at them, only making matters worse. She stared in silent horror that they should all know what had just taken place.

  “What’s wrong?” Arjan asked.

  Christopher quickly recovered. “It’s nothing. I was just startled. Thought maybe a spider had come to share my cake.”

  “You scared of spiders, too?” Jonah asked. “Just like me?”

  “And me,” Emma said, shuddering for emphasis.

  “Not me,” Darcy declared. “I think they’re amazing. I saw a really big one the other day in the barn.”

  “Well, you need to be careful,” Mother chided. “There are a great many poisonous insects and snakes here in Texas. I wouldn’t want you to get sick from a bite.”

  “She’s right. Spiders can be very dangerous,” Christopher said, catching a sidelong glance at Deborah. “Often they appear without warning.”

  Deborah thought she might well die of embarrassment. She stared at her hand, still feeling the touch of his thigh beneath her fingers.

  “Did you get bit?” Emma asked. “You keep looking at your hand.”

  Snapping her head up to meet everyone’s intent stare, Deborah shook her head. “No. No, it’s fine.”

  “I should probably check it,” Christopher said, reaching over to take hold of her.

  He was only making this that much harder. Deborah squirmed in her seat, but Christopher refused to let go of her.

  “There are jumping spiders,” Tommy offered. “I heard about them at school last year.”

  Christopher nodded. “Perhaps that was what I was thinking of just now.”

  Deborah wished she could find some excuse to leave. Of course, that would only serve to bring more unwanted attention.

  “So when are you two gonna get around to havin’ that weddin’?” G.W. asked, putting his arm casually around Lizzie’s shoulders.

  “That’s a very good question. In fact, it’s one that I was kind of hoping to resolve myself.” Christopher turned to Deborah. “Why don’t we take a little walk—check out my new home?”

  “Be sure and look for spiders,” Jonah instructed.

  Christopher gave Deborah a wicked grin. “I would very much like to look for spiders.”

  Deborah felt her eyes widen and her throat tighten. Goodness, but would he ever stop teasing her about this?

  Mother gave the final piece of cake to Arjan. “The cabin is all aired out, and I took fresh linens and bedding out there. I doubt you’ll see any spiders. You, of course, will take your meals with us, Christopher.”

  “I’d like to see anyone stop me,” he said, finishing the last bit of cake on his plate.

  Deborah had never seen anyone gulp down food so fast, but even now, Christopher was pushing back his chair. “Will you accompany me? We can pick our wedding date.”

  “Now, I don’t want to sound harsh,” Arjan said, picking up his fork, “but if she’s not back here in fifteen minutes, I’m gonna send the children over to see what’s keepin’ her.”

  “If there are spiders,” Darcy said, “I can help you kill them. Just come and get me.”

  “I will do that, sister of mine.” Christopher got to his feet and extended his hand to Deborah. “Fifteen minutes is more than enough time. If she can’t make up her mind on a date in that span, I’ll fix it myself.”

  Arjan laughed and nodded. “Go on, then.”

  Deborah had no chance to refuse. Christopher quickly hurried them out of the dining room and into the kitchen. From there, they slipped out the side door. By the time they cleared the back of the house and were half way to the cabin, Christopher burst into laughter and lifted Deborah to whirl her in a circle.

  “You are quite the catch, Miss Vandermark.”

  Deborah felt her cheeks grow hot again as Christopher returned her to her feet and pulled her close. “I think you are the most charming woman I’ve ever met.”

  “Because I grabbed your leg instead of your hand?”

  He laughed again and kissed her nose. “No, because you were so embarrassed by it. For a physician well acquainted with the anatomy, I am rather surprised, however, that you should mistake one part for the other.”

  “You moved your hand to pick up your plate. It’s a wonder you didn’t drop it,” she said, clinging to what little self-respect she had left. “And then you start speaking about spiders, of all things.”

  “Would you rather I had pointed out your firm hold on my thigh? Of course, I could have told the family that you couldn’t help yourself—that you were quite overpowered by your attraction to me.” He put his finger to his chin. “No, I don’t suppose that would have gone over all that well. Your brother would probably have refused to let me stay anywhere on this property if he’d thought that was the case.”

  “Oh, you are impossible,” she said, moving away from him to head back to the house.

  Christopher moved quickly, however, and pulled her back against him. “Darling, you need never be embarrassed around me. I might tease you, and I might correct your medical skills, but I would fight to the death to defend you and keep you from shame.”

  Deborah felt his arms tighten around her and leaned back against him with a sigh. How she loved this man. “June the eleventh,” she said in a barely audible voice.

  “June eleventh? What about it?”

  “That will be our wedding day.”

  He loosened his hold and turned her to face him. “But that’s over three weeks away. Do we have to wait so long?”

  She smiled and gently brushed his lips with her finger. “The time will fly by. You�
�ll see.”

  He sighed and nodded. “I suppose if that’s the way it must be.” He paused and cocked his head toward the cabin. “In the meantime, we could look for spiders.”

  Deborah pulled away and started back for the house. “I’ll get Darcy to help you.” His laughter rang in her ears, and Deborah couldn’t help but smile.

  Deborah stood back as Zed and Pastor Shattuck loaded the last crate of Christopher’s books onto the wagon. Mara strolled out of the house with a heavy brown coat and came to Deborah.

  “Dr. Kelleher asked that you pack this in the wagon. He doubts he’ll ever need it down here, but figures it’s too good of a coat to leave behind.”

  Deborah laughed and took the piece. “Is that everything?”

  “It’s just down to a bit of cleaning now, and I told Dr. Kelleher I would handle that for him.”

  “How kind. You certainly don’t have to, though. I offered to stay behind and handle it.” Deborah tucked the coat into an open crate half filled with books. “There, that ought to ride all right.”

  Mara nodded. “I didn’t have anything special going on today and figured you would have plenty to do at the other end, setting things up.”

  Deborah considered the idea for a moment. “You’re probably right. I suppose if Christopher is all right with it, then I certainly will not argue.” She smiled. “Have you heard that we set the wedding date—again?”

  “I was going to ask.”

  “June the eleventh,” Deborah said without further prompting. “I figure Rob will be home and that will make it all the more special.”

  “Oh, that is wonderful. Do you suppose . . . I mean . . . would you be offended if we also celebrated his birthday that day—after the wedding sometime?” Mara toyed with a single long black braid of hair. “I suppose that was really brash of me to ask.”

  “Not at all. I think that would be great fun. Folks will already be gathered,” Deborah said. “You wanted it to be a surprise, so how about this—we will have the wedding and then I can turn to the congregation and announce that we’re celebrating Rob’s twenty-fifth birthday a few days early. That will be such a shock to him.”

  “You don’t think he’ll mind, do you?” Mara questioned. “I feel like I know him better and better with each letter he writes, but I also realize there is much to learn.”

  “I think he’ll be quite embarrassed and unsure what to do. But I figure that’s what will make it the most fun. Look, you get the word out to anyone and everyone that we’re going to do things this way. Your father is going to announce the wedding date at church on Sunday, so you can let other folks know then.”

  Mara smiled and hugged Deborah. “Oh, this will be so much fun!”

  “What will?” Christopher asked, coming up behind Deborah.

  She let go of Mara and turned to him. “I’ll tell you on the way home. Mara tells me she’s going to clean up for us here.”

  “Yes, she said she would like to do it for us, and I yielded to her persuasion.”

  Deborah nodded. “As did I, but I’ve also arranged to compensate her in another way. That’s what I have to explain on the way home.”

  “Are you two ready?” Arjan asked as he and G.W. climbed into the first wagon.

  Jimmy and Tommy jumped onto the back of Deborah’s wagon since it held less, and Deborah allowed Christopher to help her up. She took her place on the seat and waited for him to join her.

  “I think we’re set to go,” he told Arjan.

  “Thanks again for the help, Pastor. You, too, Zed.”

  “Glad to do it; sorry about having to do it under these conditions,” Zed replied.

  “God will work it all out,” Christopher said.

  His confidence made Deborah smile. She found strength in his words. God would work it all out—of this, she was certain.

  Euphanel finished sewing a sleeve onto the dress she’d made for Darcy. Sissy was working feverishly on hemming Emma’s smaller matching gown.

  “I think this sprigged muslin is perfect for the girls. The light blue will go perfectly with Lizzie’s gown. Her dress is the color of a brilliant summer sky and has that lovely white lace and ribbon. It will look like we planned it all along.” Euphanel held the gown up to better see the bodice. “I’m glad they’ll have a part in the wedding. That will help them to feel a part of their brother’s new life.”

  “I reckon so,” Sissy said, stopping her labor. “ ’Course, maybe it don’ matter much to them one way or t’other. Young’uns always have their own notions ’bout such things.”

  “Yes, I’m sure you’re right about that.” Euphanel looked at her friend. “I’ve sure become quite attached to the children.”

  Sissy nodded. “I reckon you have.”

  Smiling, Euphanel could see the unspoken question in Sissy’s face. The woman’s dark brown eyes seemed to demand an answer. “I haven’t mentioned it to Arjan, if that’s what you’re wondering.”

  “Don’t you reckon it’s time?”

  “I do. I had planned to talk to him today, since I knew he’d be home to help Christopher get his things. The only problem is, he’s been gone all day.” She shrugged. “Maybe tonight.”

  “You best get it talked out afore the weddin’.”

  “I will,” Euphanel promised. At the sound of the wagons pulling into the yard, she smiled at Sissy. “I’ll see if I can’t manage some time with him before supper.”

  Euphanel gave the men a half hour before she went in search of Arjan. She had practiced what she wanted to say and hoped—prayed—that he would understand and agree. Of course, he could be dead set against it, too, but she wouldn’t know until she told him what was on her mind.

  When she reached the cabin, she found Arjan getting ready to lead the first team back to the barn. “May I accompany you? There’s something I’d like to discuss.”

  “I can take the horses,” G.W. announced. “Why don’t you two go ahead.”

  Arjan seemed surprised, but made no objection. “What did you have in mind?”

  “How about a little time by the creek,” she said, taking his hand.

  They walked down the path toward the water, where Euphanel knew it would be cooler under the thick shade of the pines and hickory.

  “Have a seat first,” she said once they’d reached their favorite spot. “This might take a little explaining.”

  He raised a brow. “You been plottin’ somethin’, Wife?”

  She smiled and allowed him to help her to sit on the grass. “You could say that, I suppose. Truth is, it’s not so much plotting as . . . longing.”

  Arjan joined her on the ground and leaned on his elbow as he reclined. “All right, let’s hear it.”

  Euphanel felt a rush of doubt. What if this wasn’t a good idea? What if Christopher objected? What if Arjan thought her senseless? Now I sound like Deborah. I should just follow my own advice, she told herself.

  “I want . . . well . . . let me start at the beginning.” She twisted her hands in her apron. “As you know, I couldn’t have any more children after Deborah. The doctors weren’t really sure why, but it just never happened.”

  He nodded. “I know that grieved you. Grieved me, because of the hurt it caused you.”

  She smiled at his tenderness. “I know. Anyway, it’s just that I’ve very much enjoyed having Christopher’s little brothers and sisters here. I’ve enjoyed being a mother again.”

  “You never stopped being one of those,” he replied. Then his voice filled with regret. “Wish I could have given you a child.”

  She reached over and touched his face. “I wish I could have done the same for you.”

  “I sure hope you know that I’m not holdin’ that against you,” he said, sitting up. “Were you thinkin’ that?”

  “Of course not. You’ve never made me feel that way. It’s just me. I’ve always wanted more children, and having Christopher’s family here only served to remind me of how much I love caring for a child.”


  “I’ve grown pretty fond of Jimmy and Tommy, to tell you the truth. Tommy and I actually had a long talk out at the camp a few days back. He told me he’d learned more from me than he’d ever learned from his pa.”

  “Then maybe it won’t come as a shock to you.”

  “What won’t?”

  “What I’m about to say.” She smoothed her apron on her lap. “I’d like to talk to Christopher about letting us adopt the children. My sister has even mentioned being willing to let Jimmy come stay with her like she did Deborah. He could attend the university there in Philadelphia.”

  He grinned. “I see you’ve given this some thought.”

  She felt her cheeks flush. “I have. It’s been on my mind—day and night of late. Ever since the youngest children started calling me Mama Euphanel, I just felt a tug to give them my full time and attention.”

  “What if the boys aren’t of a mind to go changin’ their name to Vandermark? They may not have gotten to learn much from their pa these last years, but he was still the one to give them the Kelleher name.”

  “I thought of that, too,” Euphanel said. “I guess what I mean by adopting is that we would take on the responsibility of seeing that they’re raised right. A guardianship might be a better way to suggest it. It would also free Christopher and Deborah from having to deal with a ready-made family.”

  “What if they want that responsibility?”

  “Then we just offer our support and perhaps we could look at finding some children to adopt elsewhere.” She looked at him with a questioning gaze. “Would you consider that?”

  “Nell, there isn’t much I wouldn’t consider for you. God knows I’ve wanted to give you a much better life than we’ve known these last couple of years.”

  “Oh, go on with you, Arjan Vandermark. We’ve had a good life and don’t you go forgetting that. God has given us many blessings. Sure, things are rough right now, but God has made a way even in that. I’m truly a happy woman.” She paused and gave him a smile. “I’ve just been thinking that I could be happier.”