Looking puzzled, Coach Renwick asked, “Why not? Did you get better forms?”
“Kinda.” I lifted my blouse and exposed my wonderful, new boobs struggling against the confines of my bra.
At first Coach seemed to not understand what I was doing. Finally she said, “You have breasts? Are they yours?”
I pulled my blouse back down and said, “I got a boob job over the holidays. I did it for Jeff, who’s now never going to see them.”
Coach Renwick suddenly sat down on chair. “You had surgery?” When I nodded, she ran her hand through her hair in an exasperated gesture.
“Something wrong?” I asked.
“Honey, why didn’t you say something to me before you did that?” Coach asked as she stared at the wall.
With a feeling of impending dread, I asked, “Why? Is something wrong?”
The coach gestured for me to sit down in one of the other chairs in her office. As I did so, she said, “You had surgery! The cheerleading contest is only two weeks away! You can’t have any major surgery within thirty days of the contest! Honey, you just disqualified yourself from the contest!”
My heart sank and I felt tears start to well up. “No! You can’t do that! I’ve been looking forward to this contest since I became a cheerleader. It was one reason I stayed a cheerleader! Don’t do this to me. I feel great. I don’t think it’d be a problem, coach.”
Coach Renwick just sat there and shook her head. She said, “No, it’s school policy and it’s my policy. No, the risk of you being injured is too high.” She paused a moment, then added, “I’m not upset with you, Chrissy, but I really wished you had consulted with me first. You could have gotten your boob job afterwards. Now it throws the whole contest into doubt.”
I started to cry as I said, “You mean you’re not going to go to the contest because of me? Coach, the squad can still go. We’ve been working so hard to get there!”
“How, Chrissy?” the coach asked. “How? The routines require six girls. We can’t do them with five. Our biggest sponsor, the father of your friend Sandy, might pull out if you don’t go. Even if we have enough money for the trip, we don’t have time to get a new girl up to speed on the routines. Not in two weeks.”
I just sat in the chair, bent over and crying my eyes out. “I always ruin everything!” I cried. “Everyone would have been better off if I’d just said ‘No’ to you guys when you first asked me to be a cheerleader. I should have — I was happy as a boy. I’ve cried more in the past six months than I have in my whole entire life! I’ve lost my boyfriend, I’ve lost the contest for the squad. I can’t do anything right!” My whole body heaved from sobbing.
Coach Renwick rolled her chair next to me and put her arm around my shoulders. She said in a soothing voice, “That’s not true, Chrissy. Without you, the squad wouldn’t have made it as far as they did. Even without the contest, we’re considered one of the top squads in the state! That wouldn’t have happened without you. And even Jeff — he wouldn’t have his scholarship without your help. We’ve actually had more spirit at this school this past season than we’ve had in a long time. You’re one of the best cheerleaders we’ve ever had, so I wouldn’t say you’ve ruined anything.”
I didn’t take much comfort in her words as I continued to cry. I had ruined everything. If I hadn’t joined the cheerleaders, they would have found some other girl — a real girl — to fill out the squad. I would have stayed a guy and not be disappointing my dad. My life would be normal and the squad would probably still be going to the contest. Mandy’s the squad leader. Mandy’s the one who has been pulling the squad together, not me. Coach should know that.
The only positive I can take away from this whole mess is that the relationship between my sister and me is a lot better than it used to be. I’ve never been this close to her in my whole life. I can’t say we don’t fight anymore, but it’s nothing like we used to do. And Diane treats her sister much better than she ever treated her brother.
My crying slowed down as a thought gelled in my mind.
I said, “Coach. I think I have an idea. It still sucks for me, but I think the squad can still go to the contest.”
Coach leaned back in her chair and said, “Oh? And how is that?”
“I’d have to ask her, of course, but Diane could go. Diane could take my place.” I said, sitting straighter in my chair. "She's the best cheerleader this school ever had. She could get up to speed on those routines in no time."
Coach Renwick frowned as she said, “Diane? She’s what? Twenty-two? Twenty-three? Even if she said she’d do it, I’m not sure if she could keep up with seventeen year olds. Not to mention that she’s way too old to be a high school student. It’d be like cheating.”
“Coach, I’m a boy. You already were going to be cheating.” I said.
* * *
As I headed for my third period class, there was Joey at his locker swapping books in his bag, as usual. He looked up and when he saw me approaching, his expression shifted to one of sympathy.
"Hi Joey,” I said as I approached him.
"Chris. I heard about you and Jeff. I'm really sorry," Joey said. "Are you okay? You look like you've been crying?"
With a clink of metal, I fell back against the row of lockers. "I have a lot to cry about today. And it's just not about Jeff." I gave Joey a brief rundown of my conversation with Coach Renwick.
His expression changed from concern to utter sadness. He plopped to the floor, his back against the lockers. "Ah, fuck man, I'm sorry! It's my fault. I knew I shouldn't have given you that card!" He slapped his forehead with his palm and said, "I'm such a screw-up!"
I knelt beside him and put my hand on his shoulder. I would have sat next to him, but I didn't want to get on the floor with a short skirt on. I said, "Oh, no Joey! It's not your fault. You didn't know. I really should have talked to Coach first. And Joey, I really love my breasts! I feel so much more like a girl with them and I wouldn't have them without you!"
"But because of me, now you and possibly the whole squad won't get to go to the contest. You guys have been working so hard. I've been watching you practice." Joey's eyes seemed to focus on something far away.
"I have a plan, if I can talk my sister into it," I said. "I won't get to go, but maybe the squad can." I filled Joey in on the plan.
Joey looked over to me and asked, "Do you think she'll do it? You guys look a lot alike, but you don't look exactly alike. She's blonder and taller, I think."
"Details. Just details. I sure hope she'll do it. She's very stubborn, but she really loved cheerleading." I looked at my watch and said, "I'm late, I have to go."
Joey looked up as I started to walk away and said, "Well, good luck with that, Chrissy. And I'm very, very sorry."
I turned around to wave and said, "Don't be."
* * *
Five sad-faced girls stared at me at the lunch table. Stephanie said with a pout, "That's like, totally unfair!"
I shrugged and said, "I didn't make the rules. I..."
Stephanie interrupted, "It's not fair that your stupid boobs are keeping us from going to the contest! Why didn't you wait? I mean, jeez, girl. You're only eighteen. You shouldn't even be getting a boob job!"
Bristling, through clenched teeth I said, "If I had had boobs to begin with, I wouldn't have needed the boob job."
"I have to admit, that was pretty selfish of you, Chrissy," chimed in Brandi.
"Girls! Girls," said Mandy. "People are starting to look over here. Chrissy said she had a plan that might get us to the contest after all."
I let my hackles back down, took a deep breath and said, "For the record, I'm not guaranteeing anything. But this is my proposal." I then laid out my plan to use Diane to pose as me, and I pose as her.
Brittany said, "Ya' know, that like, might could work. Your sister probably has like, ya' know, already done like, most of our routines and all, ya' know?"
Brandi said, "What like, she said. Ya' know?" She then laug
hed.
Mandy took a bite of celery and asked, "When are you going to ask her? Do you think she'll do it?"
"I'll ask her tonight. Knowing Diane, she'll say 'No' at first because of something stupid like 'that would be going backwards' or some other crap," I said. "But I think her ego will get the best of her. It always does."
After swallowing her sip of fruit flavored water, Mandy said, "Call me as soon as you know something, okay?"
Nodding, I said, "I will."
* * *
The day was finally over. I walked slowly through the rapidly emptying halls. The stares and the whispering had finally died down to a minimum after lunch. Tomorrow will be a normal, albeit Jeff-less, day.
After transferring my books from my bag to the locker and getting just the books I needed for homework, I hurried around the corner to head for home. I didn't look and bumped into someone, and I almost dropped my books.
"No running in the halls, young lady!" said a stern voice. I looked up and saw that it was Jeff. A brief smile darted across his face.
"Oh, it's you," I said sourly. I started to walk around him.
"Chrissy, I..." Jeff started to say, and then his voice trailed away.
I turned halfway 'round to look at him and said with a tinge of nastiness in my voice, "I have nothing to say to you." I started to turn back around and Jeff grabbed my arm.
"Chrissy, I need to talk to you," said Jeff as he held my arm.
Scowling, I jerked my arm away and said, "Don't ever touch me again!"
"Chrissy, please. Just one minute."
I stood there a moment, breathing noisily through my nose. Finally I said, "Okay. One minute. I have to go."
"Chrissy, I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you."
"Oh spare me!"
"Chrissy, I did love you. I... I still love you. There's no other girl like you. But..."
Frowning, I folded my arms and said, "Go on. I'm listening."
Looking flustered, like he couldn't find the words, Jeff's face flushed and his muscles tightened. "It's just that... it's just that, well... Dammit Chrissy! It was just supposed to a pretend relationship anyway. We should never have allowed it to go as far as it did.”
Taking a few steps closer to Jeff, I said, “I know it started as a convenience for both of us. But it did grow beyond that. Every time you kissed me, were you just pretending? It didn’t mean anything?”
“No.” The word emerged from Jeff’s mouth like a gunshot. “No, Chrissy. I wasn’t pretending. I came to love you more than any other girl. I’ve never even dated anyone as long as I dated you. But… I… Chrissy, how can I say this?”
I just stared at him without saying a word. There was no way I was going to help him.
“It’s just that… every time I thought of having sex with you, I couldn’t stop remembering who you are.” I could tell Jeff was having a hard time speaking.
“Remembering that didn’t seem to bother you much when I… when I, um, serviced you,” I said, my anger building.
“That’s different,” Jeff said quickly. “You didn’t have to take off your clothes. I didn’t have to see anything.”
I stepped right in front of him and looked up at those blue eyes that no longer made me melt, eyes that were no longer inviting. Trying to keep from shouting, “It’s… still… sex! You didn’t mind me giving you sex, but you couldn’t bring yourself to return the favor.”
Jeff gave me a disgusted look as he said, “You really want something like that? I’m sorry, I’m not gay. That would be like, really gay.”
“It would have shown your love for me,” I said flatly. “Here you lead me on, taking love from me while you wouldn’t make love to me because of some sexual hang-up? I’m sorry my plumbing isn’t to your taste. But I’m all girl and you just threw away the best thing that has ever happened to you.”
I spun on my heel and started walking away from him.
“Chrissy, wait!” I heard a few footsteps as Jeff started to follow. Then they abruptly stopped. I didn’t turn around. I just continued walking away.
* * *
“Not just no, but hell no!” said Diane as she stood up from where she was sitting on the couch. “Where did you come up with such a ridiculous idea? I’m too old to pretend to be you. Not only that, but that would be going backward.”
“Come on, Diane,” I pleaded. “I’m screwed no matter what, but the rest of the squad deserves to go to the contest.”
“For the last time, No!” Diane said with finality.
* * *
Chapter 10
"For the last time, I said no!" Diane folded her arms across her chest as she plopped down on her bed.
"Please?" I begged as I followed her into her room and sat down next to her on the bed.
"No! Now leave me alone!"
"Oh, come on, Diane!"
"Chrissy, I realize that you're the kind of girl who can't say 'no', but I'm not. Saying no is easy for me."
"At least tell me why not," I said, letting the insult slide.
"I've told you already! I'm too old to be you. I haven't done cheerleading in years. And I just don't want to!"
I said, "You were going to be me for the physical!"
Diane frowned. "That's different. I don't have to do any jumping around for that!"
I stared at my hands and sighed. "I guess Coach Renwick was right. She didn't think you'd be up to the job anyway. I wish I'd never gotten these boobs, now!" I was on the verge of tears again.
Diane put her hand on my shoulder and said, "Coach Renwick said what?"
Trying to fight back tears I said, "She said she thought you were too old anyway. She said you'd never be able to keep up with the seventeen year old girls there."
Diane bristled. She said, "You're lying! Coach wouldn't say that! I'm her best cheerleader."
I shook my head and pointed at my chest. "That would be me now. I'm her best. And I'm not lying. You can ask her yourself. That's what she said."
Diane's eyes flashed. "That's just crazy! I can blow the pom-poms off of any cheerleader on the squad! I'm serious!"
I laughed and said, "You? You're practically on Social Security! You couldn't cheer your way out of a wet paper bag!"
Diane gave me a shove that almost catapulted me off the bed. She said, "I'm only twenty-three you little skank! I can still out-cheer anyone on your squad!" She pulled my hair.
I pulled her hand away from my hair, and whacked her in the head with a pillow. I shouted, "Prove it!"
With her pillow she pounded me with a punishing body blow that caused me to slide off the bed. She shouted back, "I don't have to prove anything! I'm the best cheerleader that school ever saw!"
Giggling, with hair going in all directions, I sat up beside the bed and said, "Maybe back in the Stone Age! But you don't hold a candle to Mandy or me! I now hold that best Cheerleader title, oh ancient one!"
She pulled my hair again and pelted me with her pillow. "Stone Age?! I could take your spot right now and everyone would say, 'Hey, when did Chrissy finally learn how to be a cheerleader?'"
Pulling the hair from my face I said, "Well, do it! Prove me wrong!"
Throwing her pillow at me, catching me between the eyes, she said, "No, I'm just saying I'm better. I don't want to be a high school cheerleader again."
I pulled her hair and shouted, "Chicken! You just don't want to prove I'm right! You don't want to look foolish in front of the squad while trying, and failing, to do a cheer!"
"What? Are you deaf?" Diane sat up straight. "I already told you I can cheer circles around you and the other girls."
I shook my head and said, "I don't believe you. I'd have to see it. In fact, I'd love to see you try to cheer while carrying a cane!"
Diane said through clenched teeth, "I can out-cheer all of you! I'll show you! When is the next practice?"
"Tomorrow, right after school," I said.
Angrily Diane said, "Fine! I'll be there!"
Equally angri
ly, I said while leaning in towards her, "Fine!" I got off the bed and quickly left the room.
I walked to my room with an ear-to-ear grin. Diane is so predictable.
* * *
We'd all found a reason to leave class right after the start of third period and meet up in Coach Renwick's office.
Coach leaned back in her chair and said, "Okay, Chrissy. We're all here. What kind of news do you have for us?"
I looked first at Coach Renwick, and then I looked at each girl's expectant face as they all circled the small office. I smiled slightly and said, "Okay guys, I think I have my sister hooked. She's taken the bait and now all we have to do is reel her in."
Brandi asked, "Did you watch a fishing show last night?"
Ignoring her, I said, "I got her to want to prove she still has what it takes to be the best cheerleader. She's coming to practice today as me. She's even going to use a temporary dye to get her hair darker like mine. Her ego just needs some egging on. We just want to push her over the top, not over the edge."
Mandy asked, "Like, how? What do you want us to do?"
"Just little irritating things, like saying 'I didn't know dinosaurs shaved their legs'. Crap like that. We want to tweak her ego, not piss her off. If she gets really mad, she's more likely to just say screw you and walk off."
Coach Renwick said, "Got that girls? Needle her; don't make her mad." Pointing at me, Coach continued, "You're not going to be there, right? You need to make sure you stay home then. Okay girls, I think we have a plan. See you this afternoon."
As we all started to leave, Coach Renwick said, "Oh, just one other thing. Don't forget our last fundraiser this Saturday. We're going to be doing the car wash right out there in the north parking lot. Chrissy, I want you to help out on this, not your sister, okay?"
I said, "I'll be there, Coach."
* * *
"Wait, wait, wait," I said. Diane was sitting next to me on the couch, trying to keep from laughing. The rest of the squad had gathered at our house and were sitting around at various locations in the living room. "Tell me what happened, but start at the beginning!"
The Reluctant Prom Date (The Reluctant Series Book 4) Page 12
