Nobody's Lady

by Annabelle Anders

  It would have all been vastly amusing, Lilly thought, had they not been sitting directly in front of Lady Natalie and her betrothed. It was as though Michael’s gaze burned into her back. Each time Danbury place a kiss on her knuckles, it felt like a betrayal. Why, oh why, did life have to be so complicated?

  Hawthorn was in attendance as well and appeared slightly perplexed as he watched Danbury’s antics. More than once, Lilly caught the unnerving gentleman scowling in her direction. She had to admit having Danbury as an escort, as something of a protector, was soothing. Throughout her marriage, she had often been exposed to insult and injury. There was an ease in knowing she was not the only person watching out for her well-being.

  Danbury entertained her and those around them by whispering very unlover-like things into her ear throughout the concert. He told her that her eyes were the color of a goldfish he’d had as a child. He told her he’d try to kiss her, but he’d be thinking of his goldfish while doing so and that would ruin his manhood for all others. He told her she probably would not enjoy him kissing her anyway, what with all of her fishiness and his feline charm.

  It appeared to the world, however, that he was infatuated.

  Hawthorn was not the only person present who was bothered by Danbury’s display.

  ****

  “Why on earth would Lilly enter into a liaison with Lord Danbury?” Lady Natalie leaned into Michael and whispered. “I know he’s your friend, but he’s not likely to have honest intentions! Oh, I do not wish to see Lady Beauchamp hurt. I think she has been sad for a long time.”

  Michael patted her on the arm but could not find the right words to respond. Did Danbury have to sit so very close to Lilly? Did he have to touch her that often and was that his hand upon the lady’s thigh? And although he was charmed to see Lilly smothering laughter more than once, he could not help but feel annoyed that it was Danbury who incited it. Most likely he was murmuring romantic drivel into her ear.

  The plan was most effective, nonetheless, for Hawthorn looked stymied indeed. Michael was coming to think that Lilly was right. Hawthorn could not have had a very good look at Lilly’s companion in the gazebo. Perhaps he now doubted himself.

  Even more encouraging, over the past few weeks, members of Parliament were coming to doubt Hawthorn. His ravings sounded increasingly like those of a madman, so much so even strong proponents of the Corn Laws had begun politically distancing themselves from him. Not that this meant they would change their vote, but it was likely, even if Hawthorn did expose Lilly, nobody would believe him. Michael hoped the situation would resolve itself soon enough. He was doing his best to leave the past in the past. Except was it the past anymore?

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Temptation

  What with the work Michael was attempting to accomplish in Parliament, he had little time to visit his fiancée.

  Furthermore, he lacked much desire to do so.

  But it was expected of him. Her father expected it. Her mother expected it. Hell, all of society expected it.

  And Lady Natalie was a lovely girl. She’d done nothing to put him off. In fact, he’d realized she wasn’t nearly as empty-headed and frivolous as he’d feared.

  No, it was nothing she’d done.

  So, when she requested he attend a picnic she’d scheduled with her brother and Miss Glenda Beauchamp, he felt duty bound to accept. He set aside an entire day, rearranging meetings and appointments so he could participate.

  She had failed to inform him, however, that Danbury and Lilly would be attending as well.

  Seeing Lilly in society, even from a distance, had been difficult. She stirred a restlessness inside of him. And something else—something he was reluctant to identify.

  But he was an engaged man. Contracts had been signed, and it went without saying he would dance attendance upon Lady Natalie. He was a grown man—a duke, for God’s sake. He would be pleasant and sociable. He could control his urges for a few hours.

  Nonetheless, upon arriving at Lady Eleanor’s townhome in the Earl of Ravensdale’s newest open carriage with Lady Natalie, her brother, and Danbury, Michael looked to the sky hoping for rain.

  Not a cloud in sight. In fact, the morning air promised to turn unseasonably warm as the day progressed.

  Planned to take place at one of Ravensdale’s smaller properties, the picnic would be held a little over ten miles outside of London. The earl had told Michael he would be doing him a favor by inspecting the general condition of the estate. He also told him he was pleased to hear of the excursion.

  Although modern and expensive, the carriage wasn’t quite large enough to seat three gentlemen wide, which placed Michael snugly between Lady Natalie and Lilly. Facing him was Glenda, who had Mr. Joseph Ravensdale on one side of her and Danbury on the other. They were to ride thusly for over ten miles…good God!

  His left side, cozily packed next to Lilly, sizzled with awareness. On his right side, where his fiancée pressed against him, he felt…nothing. Between the two ladies as he was, Michael sat buried in sweetly scented petticoats and skirts.

  Danbury’s eyes gleamed with laughter as he observed his friend’s predicament, but Michael merely shook his head. And then nearly laughed himself.

  For Miss Beauchamp chose that moment to open her parasol and nearly took out Danbury’s left eye. Completely oblivious to the viscount, she placed it upon her shoulder and turned to address Mr. Spencer. “I daresay…” She paused. “Joseph…” A blush crept up her neck, turning her ivory skin a delicate pink. “This phaeton is marvelous! It was so thoughtful of your father to suggest it instead of a closed coach. It’s such a beautiful day!”

  “A bit cramped for six people,” Danbury muttered.

  The younger couple ignored him.

  Joseph Spencer seemed to appreciate Miss Bridge’s tantalizing blush when she’d spoken his name. “Simply beautiful.” He returned her adoring gaze. Mr. Spencer then shifted nonchalantly and placed his arm possessively along the back of the bench, draping it casually on Miss Beauchamp’s person, somewhat hidden by the parasol.

  Danbury rolled his eyes.

  Lilly failed to notice the untoward act. And as the official chaperone, she was the obvious person to demand Spencer remove his arm.

  Nobody made any mention of it.

  Lady Natalie then opened her parasol but rested it on the open side of the carriage. If she decided to place it upon her other shoulder, Cortland’s eyes would be at risk as well.

  “I think, perhaps, ladies carry stealthier weapons than our outriders, Cortland.” Danbury mockingly glanced at the parasols. “They cover it in lace and pretend it is a part of their wardrobe, but at a moment’s notice, they can whip it open and unhand the burliest of ruffians.”

  Lady Natalie smiled prettily at the viscount. “The ruffians are not nearly such a menace as the rakes who disguise themselves as gentleman.”

  “So a man must be either one or the other?” Danbury asked, raising one eyebrow.

  “But of course. Consider my fiancé, His Grace. He is always a gentleman.” She placed her hand on Michael’s arm. “I have never had any cause for concern because he has always acted, and always will act, with the most honorable intentions. For that, I am an extremely lucky lady.”

  Danbury laughed heartily at this, causing Lady Natalie to pout. “What is so funny?”

  Michael glared at Danbury. “Nothing, nothing at all,” he reassured her. “Lord Danbury simply has something of a questionable sense of humor.”

  But inside, Michael agreed with the irony of Lady Natalie’s declaration, if not the humor of it. While his fiancée sat daintily on his right side, his left hand ached to hold the hand of the lady on his left. Lilly’s tiny hands were folded politely in her lap. He felt her shiver slightly.

  “Are you cold, my lady?” Michael asked her.

  Lilly glanced around at the other passengers. “The wind is still a bit brisk. I imagine as the sun climbs higher I will be fine.”

 
Michael leaned forward and removed his jacket with as much dignity as one could while smashed into a carriage, holding six, that likely was intended to hold only four.

  Not giving Lilly a chance to protest, he draped it over her shoulders. At first hesitant, she touched the lapels as though uncertain as to whether she ought to accept his gesture. But then a cool gust of wind blew down the narrow street.

  “Thank you, Your Grace.”

  Michael was satisfied to see her burrow into it snugly.

  “You see.” Lady Natalie spoke pointedly to Danbury. “Always the gentleman!”

  “Was he a gentleman when you knew him before, Lilly?” The young Miss Beauchamp had been paying attention to the conversation after all.

  Upon her words, Michael felt Lilly sit up straight again.

  But before she could speak, his fiancée turned to look at them both. “The two of you have a prior acquaintance?” Her eyebrows rose. She did not look angry, merely intrigued.

  “Years ago.” Lilly’s answer was vague, obviously wishing to downplay the connection.

  But Miss Beauchamp was not so cooperative…rather somewhat gauche, instead. “The duke was her beau.”

  “Glenda!” Lilly admonished her stepdaughter. And then to Lady Natalie. “His Grace and I were friends. It was a very long time ago. Heavens! I was barely Glenda’s age.”

  Lady Natalie tilted her head to one side, and her eyes narrowed slightly. Most definitely not as empty-headed as he’d thought.

  “He courted her before he was the duke,” Miss Beauchamp supplied.

  “I’d just returned from the war.” Michael could not help but remember. It had been the most tumultuous year of his life.

  “He was not a rake.” Lilly surprised him with her statement. “He was a gentleman, even then.” Upon her words, he felt a stabbing sensation somewhere near his heart. He’d acted most dishonorably.

  He could not help but meet her eyes. She was being sincere. She was not mocking him, nor speaking sarcastically.

  “I’ll bet the viscount wasn’t such a gentleman back then!” Lady Natalie laughed. Danbury took no issue with such a declaration.

  “Of course I wasn’t, my lady. Whyever would I want to be?”

  ****

  Lilly did not participate in the remainder of the conversation, which mostly consisted of Danbury and Lady Natalie bantering between each other over who of the ton were and weren’t either gentlemen or rakes. They both finally agreed that Viscount Castleton was worse than even Danbury. He must be! He was the Earl of Hawthorn’s son and heir.

  Lilly allowed their conversation to drift over her as she relished the warmth of Michael’s jacket. Michael had never smelled strongly of any cologne, so a person could only know his scent if she was close to him. Feeling herself a pathetic fool, she inhaled the distinct scent that was him—cleanliness, sandalwood, and the outdoors. She savored it. She savored his closeness. Snuggling deeper into the jacked, Lilly closed her eyes. She would only rest for a moment. Lulled and relaxed, it felt as though hardly any time had passed at all when the carriage slowed. Lilly roused herself as the driver turned, taking them up a long and elegant drive. This must be London Hills, the Earl of Ravensdale’s estate.

  Glenda could not and did not contain herself from gasping charmingly as they passed the lake and home that came into view.

  Encircled by lush greenery, tucked under an assortment of lofty trees, the three-story house was fashioned of limestone the color of butter. The manor was built on a rise, surely providing magnificent views in all directions. Southerly facing, the perfectly placed windows and arbors reflected unfettered sunlight. Lilly caught glimpses of whimsical statues of various types of birds positioned between a few charmingly situated walking paths. One path led to a lily pond with the statue of a youthful boy with his hand aloft, a small bird perched upon his wrist.

  The grounds appeared to be in pristine condition. “I thought your father said he hadn’t done much with this estate and needed us to itemize maintenance issues.” Michael spoke to Lady Natalie. “But at first glance, it looks to be in perfect repair. And it certainly isn’t ‘small.’ ”

  Lady Natalie had a smug look on her face. “The property consists of just over eighteen acres. It passes through the women on my mother’s side of the family. My mother’s older sister did not have any girls. She passed away a few years ago, and it has been put in trust for me along with annual funds for upkeep.” She turned to point out to Michael. “It’s listed in the contracts.”

  Good heavens! Lilly thought, this property was part of Lady Natalie’s dowry.

  “It’s a beautiful estate, my lady.” Glenda looked to be in awe and perhaps a tad covetous.

  The carriage pulled to a stop in front of the semicircular steps extending out and down from the grand entry. Barely waiting for it to halt, Michael climbed out to assist the ladies down from the vehicle. Lady Natalie then led them inside and directed Lilly and Glenda toward a retiring room so they could freshen up after the long ride.

  When everyone met back in the front reception hall, Lady Natalie proudly offered them a tour. Leading the way, she took Lilly’s arm while Cortland and Danbury followed. Glenda and Mr. Spencer dallied behind.

  “Oh, Lilly, I am so very glad you came today. I especially wanted to show you one of my favorite places in the entire world!”

  Lilly smiled and regarded her surroundings in admiration. “I can imagine! Do you think you and the duke will live here for part of the year after your marriage?”

  “I don’t know…I hope so.” Lady Natalie sighed, and they both took several more steps before she spoke again. “Did you have many doubts before your marriage? You mentioned once that your father pressed you into accepting your husband’s suit.”

  Lilly’s breath caught. How did one answer such a question? Lady Natalie ought to be a lovely friend and confidante, but Lilly’s previous relationship with Michael made this nearly impossible.

  Perhaps she could speak with some honesty though. “I did not wish to marry the baron. I did so entirely to please my father.”

  “Did you not like the baron?”

  This required some thought. She most definitely could not tell Lady Natalie about Rose—about the nature of her marriage to the baron. But she was sympathetic and also a little concerned at the girl’s lack of enthusiasm to marry.

  Which was ironic, indeed.

  So, she would say what she could. “I respected him and accepted him as a member of our…of society. I did not know him very well.”

  Lady Natalie had more questions. Lilly suspected she was seeking some sort of encouragement. The younger woman would be looking for reassurance that arranged marriages could be comfortable and loving.

  “Sometimes,” Lady Natalie admitted, “I feel as though I do not really know Cortland. He is so distant…so formal with me. He is very pleasant and kind. I think he is a good man, but I am becoming less certain…about other things.”

  Oh, this wasn’t fair!

  Although it was a common notion, Lilly abhorred the notion of marrying for convenience’s sake! Would she be wrong to relay her feelings to this young girl? Would she be even more wrong to withhold it? Lilly had escaped her own horrible marriage by sheer luck.

  Of course, Lady Natalie was betrothed to a man who was the antithesis of the man Lilly had married.

  But if Natalie did not think she could love him, should she not be given the idea that she ought to speak up now, rather than later?

  “My lady, Natalie, I feel it is my place here to tell you, although I think you and the duke are a good match, if you have serious misgivings you ought to speak with your mother or father. You have told me they are good parents. Surely, they will take your opinion into close consideration.” The women walked in silence as they neared the end of the corridor.

  Lilly then felt compelled to extend a word of caution. “It is just…marriage is lifelong. It is forever—or until death, anyhow.” Lilly grimaced to herself before co
ntinuing. “In time, I think you may very well come to love Cortland, but if you cannot fathom this…Well, are you prepared to live in a marriage that is platonic?” Upon these words, she forced herself to stop speaking. She must not allow her personal feelings for Michael to have any considerations in the advice she gave.

  Lady Natalie sighed heavily. “I do like Cortland. The same, unfortunately, as I like all of my brothers. And sometimes…” She looked away. “Sometimes, I just want more.”

  “Ah…” This, Lilly understood all too well. “Romance.”

  Lady Natalie came to a halt and turned to face Lilly with an anguished look. “Yes, oh, botheration! And…and…I want passion! Is that asking too much? My father and my mother love one another. More than that; they are in love with one another! I know it exists. I often wonder, even, sometimes about…Well, there are other men in this world on whom I do not look as though they are like a brother to me.” The girl’s honesty was refreshingly forthright.

  “It exists.” That is all Lilly could say. Her own heart beat much too loudly. It was impossible. This discussion was all hypothetical. There was no way Lady Natalie would break her betrothal with Michael.

  Lady Natalie looked skeptically over at Lilly and nodded. “I knew it,” she said. “There is somebody in your past who was the love of your life. From the first moment I met you, I knew you were a woman with a past. There you sat, all buttoned up and quiet, but with a mysterious light in your eyes.” At the look on Lilly’s face, she quickly took Lilly’s hands in hers. “Oh, don’t be angry with me, Lilly. It’s just, when I first met you, I knew you would be a special person to know. I thought, this lady seems like she would be a very good friend.” And then she laughed at herself. “What must you think of me?”

  Lilly swallowed hard.

  “I think that you are a very special person to know as well. And,” she added, “I think you are a very good friend to have.” They both laughed, albeit self-consciously, and continued the tour.