Please Release Me

by Rhoda Baxter

  Beth stared. Did that count? It wasn’t what she’d call a long-term relationship, but it was rather sweet. Vik was looking at her with his big puppy dog eyes. She looked at Hibs, who shrugged one shoulder.

  Hibs made a little noise as though he was trying not to laugh. Beth turned. ‘Shut your face, Mr Superior. When was the last time you had a serious relationship?’

  His smile disappeared. ‘Define “serious”.’

  ‘Where you were faithful to them and went out with them for a decent length of time.’

  Hibs frowned. ‘I’m always faithful.’

  ‘Not difficult when you change women every other day,’ said Beth.

  ‘To be fair, he does only sleep with one woman at a time,’ said Vik.

  ‘Thank you, Vik.’ Hibs raised his glass to his colleague.

  ‘You’re avoiding the question.’

  ‘No, you’re avoiding mine. What qualifies as a “decent” length of time.’

  Beth stared at him. He stared back, the corners of his mouth curling into the beginnings of a smile. He was laughing at her. Git. ‘A month,’ she said.

  ‘Oh yes. Definitely. I was afraid you’d say something difficult, like a year.’

  ‘Really?’ said Beth. ‘When was that?’ This was an insight into Hibs’s life that she hadn’t had before. As his long-time friend, she was surprised she didn’t know about this already. She’d thought she knew all about Hibs’s chequered love life. Or sex life. He seemed to think the two were the same.

  ‘Oh, a long time ago. I was eighteen.’ Hibs waved his glass vaguely. ‘It was fun. Lasted almost a whole summer.’

  ‘Why did you split up?’

  ‘I went to university.’

  Beth narrowed her eyes. He clearly didn’t want to go into details. But she couldn’t let it go. ‘This girl was the last person you showed any commitment to. She must have been very special.’

  Hibs grinned. ‘Oh, she was. Very special.’

  ‘You’ve got to tell us more, now,’ said Vik.

  ‘No. We’re not talking about me this evening. We’re talking about Beth. Now then, how about you cheer up a bit, birthday girl? You’ve been walking around with a face like a smacked arse all day. That’s not right. Is there anything we can do to pep you up?’

  Beth considered saying that telling her about his ex would cheer her up, but the glint in Hibs’s eye told her she wasn’t going to get anywhere with that.

  ‘You know what I do when I’m a bit miserable?’ said Hibs.

  ‘Get laid?’ said Beth. Vik sniggered.

  ‘I was going to say, get drunk,’ said Hibs. ‘So, with that in mind, would you like another drink?’

  ‘I haven’t finished this one yet.’

  ‘I didn’t mean another pint. I meant something stronger.’

  Beth’s hand closed around her phone, in her pocket. It was still silent. Hibs was right. Gordon wasn’t going to phone. She was just torturing herself waiting for him. She had to forget Gordon and move on. ‘Oh, what the hell,’ she said.

  ‘Good. A round of whiskies coming right up.’

  By the end of the evening, Beth was drunk and giggly. So was Vik. Hibs, quite merry himself, but more in control than the other two, decided it was time he got them home.

  ‘If we hurry, we can get Vik on the last bus.’ He watched Beth try to get her coat on and miss entirely. He caught her arm and gently guided it to the right place.

  ‘You were nearly coatless,’ said Vik, grinning. His eyes looked very round in the pub lights.

  ‘’Armless,’ said Beth and they both started giggling.

  A barmaid came over. Not the new Aussie one, Hibs noted, but one he already knew. He couldn’t remember her name but he remembered other details about her. Tattoo on the top of her hip. A tendency to make squeaking noises when aroused. He grinned at her.

  She winked at him and gathered up the glasses.

  Beth was watching him, her eyes going from him to the barmaid and back again.

  ‘Ooh, Hibs, you didn’t,’ she said.

  ‘Come on. We’ll be late for the bus. Then we’ll have to find him a taxi.’ Hibs ushered the pair of them out like they were little children. Beth veered off to the left but he caught her hand and set her trajectory for the door.

  ‘Yes, Mother,’ said Vik, making himself and Beth giggle all over again.

  The fresh air was a shock. All three stopped and stood blinking for a moment before Hibs got them moving again.

  ‘D’you know,’ said Beth as they walked down to Vik’s bus stop. ‘You’re right.’

  ‘About what?’ Her hand was still in his but she didn’t seem to notice. Hibs gave her hand a squeeze to see if she’d respond. Nothing. She was just using him to keep herself upright. He suppressed a sigh and reminded himself he was being a supportive friend. Literally.

  ‘About the alcohol. It doesn’t hurt so much any more.’ She pressed her free hand to her sternum. ‘Here. It normally hurts here.’

  Hibs looked at her, suddenly sober. He hated that Gordon had this hold on her. Why would someone who was normally so cheerful and confident let herself be treated like a possession?

  He wished he could do something. He wanted more than anything in the world to help her, but he didn’t know how. Sometimes he thought it would be easier if Gordon had actually hit her. At least then she could see him for the bully he was. At least then Hibs would have an excuse to go for him. But Gordon was sly in his bullying. He always provided ways for Beth to excuse him. Bastard.

  ‘Bus!’ said Vik. He started to run, not quite in a straight line, towards the bus stop. The bus pulled up and opened its doors to the waiting queue.

  ‘Come on,’ said Hibs. Still holding Beth’s hand, he started to run.

  Vik reached the bus just in time.

  As they stood there waving, Beth slowly leaned against Hibs, closer and closer until he had to let go of her hand and get her around the waist.

  ‘I’m shoo drunk,’ she murmured into his collar.

  Hibs fought the urge to put both his arms around her and cradle her. If he kissed her now, he guessed she’d let him, but that was wrong. He hadn’t got her drunk to take advantage. He’d hoped that breaking her out of her normal routine would shake her into realising that Gordon wasn’t the be all and end all of things. There were other men out there. She was too good for him.

  ‘Let’s go get you a coffee,’ said Hibs. ‘And a glass of water.’

  Beth shook her head. ‘Take me home, Hibs. Please.’ She looked up. To his horror, there were tears in her eyes. As he watched, one loosened itself and meandered down her cheek.

  ‘Oh Beth. He’s not worth it, you know. Really. He’s not.’ He reached out and wiped the tear away with his thumb. ‘He’s not going to call you. He left. You’re going to have to learn to accept that.’

  ‘I know. I know. You’re right. I’m so stupid.’

  ‘You’re not stupid. You’re just …’ What? Misguided? Naive? Trusting? Gorgeous. He shook his head to get rid of the thought. Focus, Hibbotson, focus. ‘You just fell for the wrong guy.’ Arse. Where did that come from? He must have been watching too much late night TV. ‘You’re a nice person. You expect other people to be nice and play fair. Some of them don’t.’ They started walking, Beth leaning heavily against his arm. Her footsteps were erratic so he used his arm around her waist to straighten her up and tried not to think about the warm press of her hips against his.

  ‘I’m a doofus.’

  ‘No you’re not. You just made a mistake. You need to get over it and move on. Now you know, you won’t make that mistake again.’

  Beth blinked. ‘You’re really clever,’ she said. ‘You’re like that guy with the hat and the beard.’

  ‘Terry Pratchett?’

&
nbsp; ‘No, silly. The other one. Gandalf.’

  Hibs stopped. Beth nearly fell over. ‘Gandalf?!’ He was only a few years older than her! ‘I’m only twenty-nine.’

  Beth giggled. ‘I mean wise like Gandalf. Not all beardy like him.’

  ‘Well that’s a relief. Wise, I can deal with.’ They started walking again. He was glad he had made her laugh. At least she had snapped out of her morose mood. Beth giggled again and laid her head briefly on his shoulder as they walked and Hibs felt happier still.

  When they got to Beth’s apartment block, they took the lift. Beth leaned her head against Hibs again and by the time they got to the right floor, she was asleep, her head resting on his shoulder. As the lift doors slid open, Hibs sighed and picked her up. Her head lolled back. Well, if he had been trying to get her drunk and have his wicked way with her, he would have done a lousy job.

  He got to the door and realised that he would have to look through Beth’s pockets to find her keys. Carrying her home was one thing. Rooting through her pockets was tantamount to sexual harassment. Hibs sighed. With some effort he hitched her up a bit, redistributing her weight so that he could reach the doorbell. As she settled back into his arms, she started to snore quietly.

  The door opened and Beth’s flatmate, the cute one from the pub earlier, stood there. What was her name? He quickly ran through past conversations. Ah yes. ‘Hi, Anna. I’ve … er … brought Beth home.’

  Anna looked down at the sleeping Beth and opened the door wider. ‘Come in. Is she okay?’

  ‘She’s fine. Just a bit drunk.’

  ‘A bit?’ said Anna. ‘What did you do to her?’

  ‘Whisky.’ He moved carefully round the coats, taking care not to bang Beth’s head or feet on the wall. ‘Shall I put her on her bed?’

  ‘Sure. It’s the second room.’

  Hibs already knew his way around Beth’s flat – he’d been round before. The last time had been her old flatmate’s leaving party. He took Beth into her room and laid her gently on the bed. Kneeling on the floor, he slipped her shoes off, and then sat back on his heels to look at her. She looked so very peaceful.

  He leaned towards her. She smelled of alcohol and, more faintly, of that perfume she wore that reminded him of moss and woodland. Her hair was tousled and falling over her face. He moved it off her cheek with a forefinger. When had he fallen in love with her? He didn’t know. It had happened so slowly, that creeping attraction. Until one day he looked at her and felt his heartbeat in his ears.

  But she was his friend now. And she was still in love with Gordon. Even if she weren’t a friend and colleague, she had no interest in him, whatsoever. He sighed and stood up. Turning, he found Anna in the doorway.

  ‘She okay?’ She nodded towards Beth, who curled up into a ball with a sigh.

  ‘She’ll have a hangover in the morning.’ He left the room, shutting the door softly behind him. ‘You might want to put a glass of water by her bed.’

  Anna followed him. ‘Can I get you a coffee or

  anything?’

  Hibs hesitated. Anna was wearing cotton pyjamas and a little top with spaghetti straps. He could see the piercing in her navel. She’d had plenty of time to go and get a jumper, if she’d wanted to. She folded her arms over her breasts and smiled at him. Interesting.

  ‘Actually, a glass of water would be great.’ He leaned on the countertop. There was a stack of birthday cards, opened and carelessly discarded. ‘We were celebrating Beth finally admitting that things were over with Gordon.’

  ‘Oh yeah. Gordon the golden ex.’ Anna handed him the glass and leaned on the counter next to him. ‘I’ve heard a lot about him.’ She was standing very close. Too close, he noted with amusement. ‘So what prompted her to finally accept it?’

  ‘He didn’t send her a birthday card.’

  Anna made a tutting sound. ‘Tit.’

  Hibs’s eyes automatically flicked to her chest. When his brain caught up with him, he looked back up to see she was smiling.

  ‘You did that on purpose,’ he said.

  Anna raised an eyebrow. ‘And?’

  Hibs stared at her for a moment, seriously tempted. But that would annoy Beth … and it would be really awkward tomorrow. Besides, his head was starting feel like it was stuffed with lead. He needed to go home, drink a huge amount of water and go to bed, or he wouldn’t be able to function in the morning.

  ‘I should go,’ he said. His eyes didn’t leave her face. ‘It was nice to see you again, Anna.’

  ‘Likewise.’ She moved away. ‘I’m sure I’ll see you again, soon.’

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