Breakaway: A New Adult Anthology

by Jay McLean

  "What would happen to her otherwise? Would you release her into the wild?"

  He looked uncomfortable. "It's not easy to successfully introduce a dolphin into the wild. They're social animals. They need a group to which they belong."

  "If you capture them, aren't you stealing them away from their social group?"

  "We don't capture wild dolphins," he said firmly. "Ours are born here."

  "You're still enslaving something which deserves to be free." Why couldn't I shut up? Joaquin was supposed to be my spring fling, not a debate opponent.

  He shrugged. "There are those who say dolphin parks and research facilities are ultimately good for the species because people who grow to love them will be more likely to support helping them and maintaining their habitats. Research is necessary to know what they need to survive in a marine world which is increasingly dominated by humans."

  I snorted indelicately. "Self-justification."

  "Hey," he said, his voice carefully neutral, "we need to make a living. Not everyone is born in your circumstances."

  That shut me up. Not because he knew anything about my circumstances, but I didn't know his either. What would I do to survive if I'd been born somewhere without a lot of options?

  He seemed to be tired of the argument as well. "You need to come over here," he said, beckoning me. "I'm going to show Rosa you're my friend."

  "Am I your friend?" I looked into his deep brown eyes as I grabbed onto the dock to anchor myself.

  He seemed surprised by the direct question. "Of course," he said. "At least insofar as Rosa understands friendship."

  "Oh, that's quite a daunting qualification."

  "Aw, come on," he said, ducking his head. "You know what I mean. I want you to be able to play with Rosa."

  I didn't really know what he meant, but I didn't want to argue and I did want to get closer to him. I swam the few strokes out to where he was treading water.

  A small smile curled up his chiseled lips. "Closer."

  He didn't have to ask me twice. I moved so close that the rippling water butted me up against him. I smelled him, hot and male, even above the sharp tang of the sea.

  "That's good." He turned away and slapped the water again. I saw the sleek gray body of the dolphin gliding our way. With one arm, Joaquin gently pulled me a little behind him and held me there casually. "Let her see you here," he said, "so she gets used to you."

  I scarcely cared about the dolphin. I could feel the muscles in Joaquin's arm as he kept me anchored to his side, and my body was buzzing from the contact. His hand on my shoulder was warm and strong and I enjoyed the feeling of being held within his embrace, even if it was not truly a lover-like embrace. I didn't mind pretending.

  The dolphin swam up alongside him, brushing her long body against him. "Good girl," he crooned, letting his free hand drift over the animal's body.

  All I could think about was how I wanted to hear that voice crooning to me, and feel that hand gliding over my body. Why was he wasting all that tender charm on a dolphin?

  Joaquin turned his head to look at me. "Dolphins follow a human's gaze naturally," he said. "She'll look at you."

  She did.

  "Dolphins are also very good at mimicking behavior," he said. "I want her to see me playing with you." He ruffled the hair on top of my head.

  My nipples stiffened at the delicious sensation.

  "Ummm." I tried to speak lightly. "That feels good."

  His fingers slowed a bit, so that the movement was more of a massage. I bit my lip to stifle a moan. The dolphin swam lazily in front of us, rolling a bit, and the movement of the water spread my legs apart. In the buoyant sea, one of them twined lazily around one of Joaquin's legs. If only he hadn't been wearing the wetsuit! I could still feel him stiffen however, and I thought he'd move away. But he didn't and Rosa chose that moment to brush up against him again, making high squeaks. Joaquin laughed. "I think she's jealous."

  "Do dolphins have emotions?"

  "Probably." He looked down at me. "Of course, we can't say for sure but they seem to feel happiness and sorrow. So why not jealousy?"

  "They certainly look happy."

  "They don't have facial expressions like humans do. The smile is fake."

  "It works for them, though."

  "True enough." He looked at my mouth, and I felt it curve up. "It's hard to resist a smile," he added, and I couldn't be sure who he was talking about, me or the dolphin. I hoped it was me.

  Rosa swam by us in the opposite direction, and my leg untangled itself from Joaquin's. He gave no indication that he noticed.

  "Now," he said, "move away from me. See if Rosa will approach. Dolphins are generally curious." He spoke as calmly as if he were reciting the times table.

  I hated to leave his side, but I was becoming interested in the dolphin. I swam a few feet away. Rosa circled around and around. Finally, she brushed up against me. I laughed, even as I got knocked back a bit by her mass.

  "She won't hurt you," Joaquin said.

  "She's gentle for her size, but her size is pretty big."

  "Dolphins can be aggressive," he said. "But rarely with humans."

  "Do they hurt each other?"

  "They can, especially the males."

  "Like humans."

  "Yeah, but dolphins almost never kill each other."

  "So why do they fight?"

  "Same reason men do." He draped one arm over the dock to anchor himself. "They fight to defend themselves from predators. They fight to show dominance. They fight over females."

  His gaze met my mine accidentally, and I shivered, even though I was warm in the hot sun. For some reason, Joaquin seemed very male right then, with his serious demeanor and his broad shoulders. Although he didn't give off vibes of danger, I could see him fighting for something he wanted.

  "Have you ever fought over a woman?" I heard my own words with surprise. I wasn't looking for some he-man to throw me over his shoulder and drag me into a cave.

  He didn't speak for a moment and his eyes gazed off into the distance. "In these days," he said, "a woman worth having wouldn't require the use of force." His tone was very hard. "Nor do I play games."

  "Sorry." For some reason, I apparently had pushed a hot button. "I guess modern man sublimates his violent tendencies in football games and climbing the corporate ladder."

  He shrugged. "Modern men can be terrible to each other, but they don't necessarily use overt violence."

  "You mean like putting them in jail and stuff like that?"

  He met my gaze. "Yeah. Like that. It can be just as harmful and destructive. But no one's hands get dirty. The law takes care of it." The bitterness in his tone was strong enough to cut me.

  Rosa bumped me again and I decided to change the subject. "Can I touch her?"

  "Sure. She can't stay still so it's not like petting a cat."

  I reached out and had a quick brush over the dolphin's skin. It was rougher than I expected, and Rosa moved more quickly. It was exciting to feel her power and her grace. Mostly, though, I was thrilled at her friendliness. I don't know why, but it made me feel happy to have this beautiful animal nudging me with apparent affection.

  Joaquin watched us, his dark eyes steady and alert. I didn't know if he was paying more attention to me or to Rosa.

  I smiled at him. "This is a lot of fun. Thanks for bringing me out here."

  Rosa swam by and pushed me back so that I hit Joaquin again. I couldn't believe she did it on purpose, but it seemed deliberate. Joaquin's arms wrapped around me automatically, and we both laughed. "Steady there," he said. "It's rare for a dolphin to hit a human with that kind of force. I think she's excited by the extra attention."

  "She didn't hurt me. It was just a surprise." And that was my lame excuse for not trying to move away from him.

  Until he dropped his arms.

  And moved away from me.

  My eyes flew to his face.

  He gave a slight shake of his head. "We c
an't get involved."

  Why did he look so interested then? His dark eyes were hot on me, and I didn't think it was because of the sun. His arms had enclosed me more tightly than necessary when the dolphin knocked us together.

  I hesitated for a long moment, while the water gently cradled us. And I decided I wasn't going to go down without a fight. I was here on spring break, and I wanted Joaquin. Everything about him excited me, from his dark eyes and white grin to his hard body and gentle manner. His sensitivity with the dolphin was an intriguing contrast to the sharp mind I'd seen him demonstrate in math class. I met his gaze, with a challenge in mine. "Why not?" I asked.

  His gaze drifted to my mouth. "We just can't."

  "That's not an answer!"

  "It's the only one you're going to get." He hoisted himself onto the dock. "And I need to get back to work."

  He didn't know I had nothing to lose. If he didn't occupy my time and my thoughts, I'd be bound to hook up with someone much less interesting.

  I followed him out of the water and picked up my hat and beach bag. "When do you get off work?"

  "I'm done tonight at five." He said the words casually, and didn't seem inclined to follow up with any kind of an invitation.

  But I was feeling bold. "Claire and I are going out to Club Yanqui tonight," I said. "Why don't you join us?"

  He looked at me silently, his hands hanging down at his sides, his earlier friendliness gone.

  I began to feel embarrassed. It was one thing to ask a guy out, even in a casual way. But it was another thing altogether when he didn't even answer. What was his hang-up?

  "Geez." I blew out a laugh. "It wasn't a marriage proposal. Join us, or don't. We'll go either way."

  "I don't get involved with American girls." The finality in his voice made me shiver.

  I managed a laugh, even over my anger. "Involved? Getting hammered at a bar is the opposite of getting 'involved'. See you around, Joaquin." With a flip of my hand, I stalked down the dock.

  Chapter 4

  The Club Yanqui was loud and crowded and stifling. Perfect when fun was your goal. Claire and I pushed up to the door just after 9 pm. The bouncer gave us a cursory glance, but we weren't worried about being admitted. We wore mini skirts and tiny tank tops. I'd chosen flip-flops because I was tall enough and I liked being comfortable. Claire, of course, had on high heels to give herself some added height.

  We pulled up chairs to a table where Tiffany and Stephanie and some other friends were already sitting.

  "Hey, Susanna," Tiffany shouted. "Want to go shopping?" She guffawed at her own stupid joke.

  I waved my arm to get the attention of a waiter.

  Claire stuck her foot up on the table. "Love my Louboutins," she sang out and the red sole flashed like a scarlet letter. Claire wasn't poor, but she hadn't owned designer shoes in that price range before last night. Then I noticed the Prada bag that was stuck so closely to Stephanie's side it looked like a folded wing. It disturbed me that they were so blatant about their thefts.

  "I don't need anything," I said, trying to be quiet. I wasn't interested in talking about last night's escapade in front of other people.

  "Well la-di-da," Tiffany sneered. "We're not all made of money."

  "Cool it, Tiffany." I jerked my head in the direction of the other girls. "No need to advertise what we did."

  Tiffany tossed her head. "Stop being such a wuss. We borrowed a few things. No big deal. You should have stuck around last night. We had a lot of fun playing with Juanita's stuff. We like living that lifestyle, right Steph?" She elbowed her friend.

  The waitress finally made it to our table. "I don't care how much of a cliché it is," I announced. "I'm ordering a margarita." I'd come all this way. I might as well enjoy what the country was known for.

  Before the drinks even arrived, guys were asking us to dance. Some of them were cute. Most of them looked like they'd started drinking well before us. All of them had hungry eyes.

  Well, I was here for fun. No time like the present. I grabbed my drink and headed for the dance floor.

  "Bottoms up," the guy closest to me shouted in my ear. "Can't leave it on the table. Don't want to waste it." He laughed at his own joke and dragged me onto the floor. I brought the drink with me, gulping some of it so it wouldn't slosh all over me. Certainly, the floor had been sloshed on by enough people.

  My new friend was cute enough, and a good dancer. But we couldn't talk over the pounding music so we exchanged smiles and enjoyed the music.

  When he came up behind me and began grinding, I pulled away.

  An image of my parents popped into my head, unbidden. My dad loved to come up behind my mom when she was busy at the sink. He'd lean in and kiss the back of her neck and she'd giggle. "Why do you always attack me when my hands are occupied?"

  "I know you can't resist me then," he'd say. He'd put his hands on her hips.

  "When can I ever resist you?" she'd say with a smile.

  "Call me cave man," he'd say. "I like the image of the helpless woman."

  But he never humped her in public, like guys were doing all over the dance floor here.

  I banished the image of my parents. I didn't want to think about respect or love or any of those corny emotions that had no place in my life. My parents were gone and I had to move on.

  On the thought, I turned around and grabbed the guy's hands. I liked his wavy blonde hair, his blue and white checked shirt, even his drunken smile. Maybe if he tried again—

  Since I was now facing the door, I spotted Joaquin's dark head moving through the crowd from the entryway. He was tall enough to be seen over the crowd. Shock halted me for a moment. Then he stopped moving. I was almost positive he'd seen me. Why wasn't he approaching?

  Granted, I was dancing with someone. But that didn't mean anything in a club like this. The music pounded into me as I continued to fret about Joaquin. He had to do something to show interest. I had invited him to join us at the club. It wasn't like I'd been a shrinking violet, expecting him to do all the work.

  But I needed some indication of interest from him. He couldn't just show up and stand there and wait for me to approach.

  Annoyed, I turned my back to the door. The guy I was with wasted no time, moving up behind me again and grabbing my hips. "Let's go back to my hotel, baby," he hollered in my ear.

  "I'm having too much fun here," I shouted back. I didn't even know his name. Did he really think there was any chance I'd just walk off into the night with him?

  I twisted around, needing to see what Joaquin was doing. To my complete frustration, I saw him turn around and head for the door. Damn it. Why did I care what he was doing, when he didn't have either the guts or the interest to approach me?

  Without a word to the guy who was eyeing me like I was his next meal, I darted off the dance floor and pushed my way through the crush of bodies, not knowing what I was doing, only that I couldn't let Joaquin leave without at least speaking to him.

  I pushed open the flimsy door and bounded into the narrow street. People milled about and at first I didn't see him. "Joaquin," I called.

  When he turned to look back, I saw his face under the weak light of a street lamp. I hurried over.

  "Susanna." He shoved his hands in the front pockets of his jeans.

  "Why are you leaving? Why didn't you come over and say hello?"

  "You looked like you were having plenty of fun without me." He sounded surly.

  "It's my spring break. Shouldn't I be allowed to have fun?"

  "Sure." His dark eyes sparked for a moment. "If that's your idea of fun. Do you even know that guy who was pawing you? I didn't think you were like that, Susanna." He raised his chin as if challenging me.

  "Like what?" I felt defensive. I hadn't judged him. Who was he to judge me?

  "Rubbing up against guys you don't know, drinking too much."

  "I like guys' bodies," I said defensively. "Besides, who are you to say I'm drinking too much?"

 
; I don't know why I seized on that one topic. Because I had been drinking too much. I was kind of wobbly on my feet, and anger roiled around inside me, along with maybe a little guilt. Had I been trying to make Joaquin jealous?

  Joaquin stiffened, his shoulders seeming to grow broader. "You're right. I'm nobody. Go back into the club and have your fun, Susanna. You're only young once."

  "At least I'm young once," I called after him as he started to walk off. "Have you ever been young?"

  "Probably not." He turned back for a moment. "At least not since I lost my father."

  Chapter 5

  The next day I woke up with the expected hangover, but also with a feeling of gratitude that I was alone in my bed. Well, not alone, because Claire and I were sharing a bed, but at least I wasn't with some random guy. Not that it was my usual practice to hook up with random guys, but I had given myself permission to have some fun out of the ordinary since I was on my first spring break. But when it had been time to leave the club, none of the guys who'd propositioned me, and there had been more than one, had looked appealing once the music died and the booze started to wear off.

  But what was bothering me more than the hangover was the memory of my cruel words to Joaquin last night.

  That had been a cheap parting shot. I didn't know what his family circumstances were, why he seemed older than the other college guys. Maybe he was older. What did I know?

  ***

  I walked into the main tiki hut at the water park and spotted Joaquin immediately. He was sorting lifejackets. As if he sensed my presence, he looked up when I was still out of speaking distance. Our gazes caught and held as I continued toward him. The shade was blessedly cool after the tropical sun had seared me as I walked through the park.

  "Hi," I said when I got close enough, the word inane under the circumstances. I tried not to think about what he'd said about his father, because I knew I couldn't ask for more details without being ghoulish. At least now I know why he worked so hard.