by Nola Marie
He places his mouth back on mine and captures the gasp that slipped from my lips. There is no urgency this time. This kiss is slow and sensual as he uses his mouth to prove his words.
The room spins, but it’s not alcohol or lack of sleep. It’s the way his lips move expertly against mine. I’ve never been kissed like this. I didn’t think kisses like this were real. The kind you can feel down to your toes.
It makes me wonder what it would be like to feel him – everywhere.
“Angel,” I pant, as his mouth moves down the curve of my jaw to my neck. Nipping his way down to my collarbone. Softly sucking the skin of my shoulder.
“You’re wearing too many clothes,” he growls with that beautiful rasp that has my panties completely soaked.
I roll my hips against his towel covered erection. “Then do something about it,” I challenge.
A deep rumble vibrates his chest. His eyes flash like lightning in a storm. Barely jostling me, he has my clothes and his towel tossed somewhere behind him in a second.
His long, thick erection hangs a little between us, too heavy with arousal to stand straight. A bead of precum forms at the tip. I lick my lips wanting that salty essence on my tongue.
I raise up to take him in my mouth. I take him, just an inch at first so that I can roll my tongue over the head to catch the clear fluid, then all the way to the root of him. I look up to find his heavily lidded eyes fixed solely on me as he bites his bottom lip.
“Watching you take me in your mouth is the fucking sexiest thing I’ve ever seen,” he chokes out as he pants. I hum against him in satisfaction. “God – fucking – dammit, Josie,” he growls as his hips thrust forward, making him hit the back of my throat.
He wraps his fists into my hair forcing himself further for a couple of quick strokes. Then he pulls me off of him. “I’m not coming in your mouth, and I’m not coming before you.”
He flips me over, pulling my hips up while keeping my chest pushed down. He kneads my ass as I rest my cheek against the pillow on his bed. I’m not bashful or a prude, but when he spreads my cheeks wide, I have to fight the urge to squirm under the intense gaze I feel from being so exposed to him.
All thoughts of embarrassment quickly fly from my mind when he ignites every nerve in my body. I feel like an electrical grid on the verge of blackout when he drags his tongue from hole to hole, and back again. He presses his thumb against my ass, not entering just massaging around it with forceful pressure while his tongue – that long, beautiful tongue – fucks my pussy. He sucks my lower lips into his mouth, allowing his tongue to circle deeper.
I moan and rock against his mouth as my core spasms. His other hand reaches around to my clit, massaging at first, bringing me right to the edge of bliss. Then he rolls the small, throbbing nub between his fingers while dipping his other thumb elsewhere.
I’d like to say I see stars, but I can’t because total darkness consumes my vision as I throb and spasm around his tongue and fingers and thumb. I’m pretty sure I’m screaming out, but I can’t hear anything beyond the roar in my ears for several seconds. Then I hear the sound of foil ripping and, before I’ve come down from one orgasm, I’m on the brink of another as he enters me in one smooth, forceful stroke, reaching a spot no one ever has.
Somewhere in the back of my mind, I realize he doesn’t waste a lot of words with dirty talk. He uses his body and the sounds of our connection to fill the air with filthy words.
Even deeper in the recesses of my alcohol, sleep-deprived, and lust addled brain, I know I shouldn’t be doing this. The reasons are just right there at the edge close enough for me to grasp.
But he feels so good as his hips piston against me, rubbing that sweet spot with every thrust. I’ve wanted this for so long and it’s everything I hoped for and more than I could imagine.
I cry out as I’m brought closer and closer to what I know will be the end of me. He ruined me for all others long ago without a single touch. He shattered me with his words and slayed me with his mouth. Right now, he is ensuring my complete and utter destruction.
He drags my hips higher as he begins to swell inside of me. Short, powerful thrusts meet my g-spot in ways I didn’t know were possible. We fall over the edge together.
And, for tonight, I welcome oblivion.
Angel
I wake up to the feeling of loneliness. Not a feeling I expected to feel considering I fell asleep with Josie in my arms, but before I even touch the bed where she should be, I know I won’t find her.
I sit up in the bed pushing my hand into my hair. I have no idea why she left. Not after everything. So much was said. We were both laid completely bare. Both literally and figuratively.
The night was magical. There were no cupids flying or bells ringing. Flowers didn’t bloom and fairies didn’t sing like in all the movies Josie made me watch when we were kids.
It was so much more than that. It was the merging of the universe. The sun, moon, and stars were in perfect alignment last night. It was the coming together of everything that should’ve always been.
So why did she leave?
My initial reaction is to rage and roar, but that won’t get me answers. I will get answers and it won’t take me a goddamn decade to do it. Not this time. Try as she might, she’s not running from me anymore.
I throw on a pair of sweatpants and a shirt then quickly make my way to the door. Maddox is standing there when I fling it open. He takes me in, looking me up and down. I’m sure he sees the pissed off tension in my shoulders and the aggravation in my face. He gives a short nod then stands aside. “We’ll talk later,” he tells me. I nod in return.
I make my way to Josie’s room. I pound my fist loudly and yell. A few people poke their heads out of their doors, including Chase. Never should’ve trusted that fucker. Can’t say I blame him but that doesn’t mean we’re going to be cool.
I bang and yell again. Fortunately, we have the entire top two floors booked for the bands and crews. “Josephine Octavia Byer. If you don’t open the goddamn door, I will break it the fuck down,” I demand with a pant.
I notice Ryder and Dane both standing outside their doors watching with smirks until Maddox shoves them back into their rooms.
I’m about to start beating on the door again when it cracks. I push it open the rest of the way then make my way inside. “Why the hell did I wake up to find you gone?”
She has her back to me folding her clothes and placing them into her bag. If I weren’t so pissed, I’d laugh that she unpacked her entire bag for one night. “I had to leave before anyone saw me,” she says quietly.
“What difference does it make if anyone saw you?” I question angrily while trying to pretend she didn’t just stab a knife right into my heart.
“Because last night shouldn’t have happened,” she says so quietly that I almost miss it. I wish I had because the knife is painfully twisting.
I swallow hard and then again, choking down my bruised ego, bleeding heart, and wounded pride to move closer. I move my hands to her shoulders, putting my mouth to her silky skin. I need her to understand I don’t regret last night, and I need to understand why she obviously does. “Last night – this morning – should’ve happened years ago.”
“If it had happened years ago, it wouldn’t be a problem now,” she sniffles.
I freeze. She’s crying. Fuck I don’t want her to cry, but I’ll be damned if I understand what the hell she’s talking about.
“You’ve got to help me out, Josie,” I tell her as I wrap my arms around her. The pain in my chest lessens when she lets me, and it eases even further when she leans against me.
“I need this job, Angel. The government still has my accounts frozen, and they are still trying to pin something on me. But even if I had access to my money, I don’t want to be an architect anymore. If I lose this job, I’m screwed.”
I turn her around to face me. “That’s what this is all about? You think you’re going to get fired?”
&
nbsp; Tears spill down her cheeks as she nods. “I don’t think, Angel. I know. I signed a contract. There was an entire section about no fraternizing with the band or it would be grounds for immediate termination.”
I move to sit on the bed and pull to her sit beside me. “Why haven’t I heard about this with anyone else?”
She shrugs her shoulders and wipes her tears. I reach to catch the last stray tear with my thumb. “I don’t know about anyone else. The papers were delivered to my apartment the day before we left. I didn’t read them as well as I should have but I remember that clause very clearly.”
“We will figure this out, okay,” I tell her truthfully. “I didn’t finally get you to lose you to bullshit.”
“Nothing can ever just fall into place for us. It’s like the universe doesn’t want us together,” she says sadly.
I grip her chin and force her to meet my gaze. “Last night the universe screamed that we belong together. I’m not accepting anything less,” I tell her as I search her face for some kind of understanding and acceptance that what I’m saying is the truth. All I see is defeat. It brings back thoughts of the past. Of how she so easily gave up on me. On our friendship. “Josie, why didn’t you come to me back then? I know I put on a good show, but you had to know that no one was more important to me than you. I could’ve stopped all of it,” my gaze drops to her stomach.
It takes her a second to catch my meaning, but the second it does, I can almost feel the whoosh of air that passes as she slams down all her walls. Anger and embarrassment flash across her face. She pulls away from me quickly then crosses the room to get away. “Don’t do that, Josie,” I warn her.
“She shouldn’t have told you,” she spits venomously.
“I’ve been trying to get Eden to tell me what happened for years, Josie. Shit she should’ve told me a long damn time ago. You have been pissed that I didn’t protect you. Well, I’m fucking pissed too. I’m pissed because I wasn’t given the chance. Because I didn’t know. Do you know what I would do to him if he was standing here right now?” Her eyes brim with more tears. They keep coming, but I’m not backing down on this one. She’s been angry with me for things I didn’t do. For things I didn’t know anything about. She needs to hear how I have felt all this time. “I needed you too, you know? You thought you were holding me back or something. Well, I thought you were too good for me and the goddamn path of self-destruction I was on. I was a borderline alcoholic and addict. I fucked anyone game. But you? You were the only one I could be honest with. The only one I could just be me with no expectations. I needed my best friend. I wanted you, Josie. And I want to kill Jason and Erica for what they did to you. And I could strangle you and Eden for keeping it all from me. I could’ve stopped it. I would’ve stopped it.”
“Don’t you get it, Angel?” she asks as those tears spill. “You thought I was too good for you, and it never made sense to me why you wanted me around. I was someone who always needed protecting. I regret that I didn’t come to you. At least, I do now, knowing what I do, but it did make me stronger. Just like everything going with my father and Robert has made me stronger. I live my life for me now. But -,” she trails off, her eyes lifting to meet mine.
“But?” I encourage her to continue even though hearing her say our time away from each made her stronger hurts like a mother. I get it. I can’t deny that this Josie does not let anyone push her around. I just hate the way it happened.
“But you have always been my greatest weakness, Angel. Whether it’s making me miserable or making me feel like a princess, it’s always been you.”
“I never wanted to be your weakness,” I tell her around the lump in my throat.
She reaches up to cup my face. “You wouldn’t be if I didn’t love you so much because, let’s face it, love and hate are different sides of the same coin.”
My heart hammers against my ribs. Words I shared with her hours ago but weren’t returned, fall from her lips. I stand up and walk to her. I pull her close to me. “You said love.”
“Can’t help it,” she shrugs. “I’ve never been able to stop. If I had, the past wouldn’t hurt so much after all this time. I should’ve come to you.”
I press my lips to hers. “I should’ve tried harder. Don’t worry about your job. I won’t let anyone fire you,” I say as I kiss down her jaw.
“I don’t want to lose you either. Not when I finally have you,” she murmurs.
“You won’t,” I growl, hoisting her into my arms, making my way to the bed. “Now that I’ve got you in my bed, you’re never leaving.”
“This is my bed,” she smirks.
“Whatever,” I tell the little smart ass.
I walk into Maddox’s room to the sound of applauses, whistling, and other caterwauling from the three guys. They all grin at me widely as I shoot them my middle finger.
“Did you finally lock that shit down?” Dane taunts.
I shake my head with a laugh. “Are you twelve?”
“Awe hell. Mr. Broody is smiling,” Maddox takes his shot. “He totally got laid.”
I shake my head again. There’s no point in denying anything to them. “It’s not like I haven’t been laid since we met,” I remind them.
“True, but apparently those girls didn’t do it right ‘cause you never looked like this,” Ryder gestures to all of me.
“All right, all right,” I laugh with my hands up in surrender. “It can’t leave this room right now, but yeah we settled a lot of things.” I tell them then break down the last several hours.
“Ang, if the girl I’d wanted for so long wanted me back, I’d let the world know,” Maddox tells me.
“Believe me, I want to, but Josie says she signed some kind of contract that had a section that said no fraternization with the band. Not the tour in general. Just us.”
Each of their faces morph into doubt and confusion.
“That’s probably not unusual,” Ryder comments. “Their way of keeping our asses out of the fire, I suppose.”
“This is definitely not something the label or even Josephine’s firm did,” Maddox considers aloud. “Not the way Dirty Minds makes their way through the crew.”
“Give me a minute,” Dane says pulling out his phone. A second later it’s ringing. “You’re on speaker, Babe. We have a question to ask you.”
“What’s up boys?” Cami’s voice comes through.
We all give Dane a what the hell look. He rolls his eyes. “We’re just friends,” he mouths.
“When you signed the contracts for the tour, did any of them have anything about not engaging with the band?” I ask her.
“I didn’t really read through them, Angel. Josephine and I just signed whatever they sent to my office that day,” she tells us.
“Your office?” Maddox says leaning forward. “Did you sign anything separate from Josie?”
“No. Everything was right there in the office. Can I ask what’s going on?” I briefly fill her in on what Josie told me. “I hate to say it, but it sounds like she was giving you an excuse about why you can’t hookup.”
I laugh at how frustrated she sounds. “It’s a little late for that, so I doubt that’s the issue,” I tell her honestly.
“Thank God,” she groans. “It’s about damn time. I’ve been ready to kill her.”
“Same,” Maddox remarks looking directly at me.
“Yep,” Ryder and Dane agree.
“Fuck all of you,” I grumble. “It wasn’t that bad.”
“Man, you’ve been broody bitch since I met you. I always assumed it was the girlfriend fucking the best friend thing, but the minute Josephine appeared, it got worse,” Dane laughs.
“Goddammit, Jake,” I grit out.
“Don’t worry. He never uttered a word about Josie.”
“That’s because he doesn’t know about Josie,” I growl. “Not her name anyway.”
“Guys, I need to get going,” she tells us as some guy yells in the background.
Dane
’s face turns into a scowl. “Yeah. Thanks Cami,” he tells her.
“Do me a favor and don’t mention any of this to Josie. I promised we’d keep quiet until I figured it all out,” I tell her.
“Well, hopefully, she spills soon because I’ll be back in a few days and I have some I told you so’s to hand out,” she laughs. The guy in the background yells again. “I really do have to go,” she tells us.
We all say goodbye and end the call.
“That guy is a fucking tool,” Dane grumbles.
We all stare at him like he just grew a third head, but we don’t dare say a word. It’s like watching a deer. One wrong move and it will spook.
“So, who sent that contract to Josie if not the label or her firm?” Dane ponders aloud.
A strange feeling settles in my stomach as I sit with the three men. We’re supposed to be working on Maddox and Ryder’s new song, but, instead, we’re all focused on my problem. I don’t think I’ve ever had this before. Obviously, what I’ve learned the last few days tells me high school didn’t produce any. Apart from Jake, Josie (when we were kids), and Eden (when she isn’t being evasive as hell), I’ve never had real friends. Just the fake shiny kind that were only there when it benefitted them. I’ve never had a group of people outside my family that I completely trust.
I have my issues with my parents. My mother cheating on my father did a real number on my head, but she’s still my mother. When my dad ended their marriage over her infidelity, I didn’t think she would ever recover. She spent a couple of years in tears.
She told me she made a mistake. She felt like Dad loved his work more than her and she just wanted to feel – well, wanted. After it was all said and done, she realized she’d taken my Dad for granted because Dad really did love her more than anything. His work was demanding and required a lot from him, but he was always there with her for every birthday, anniversary, and greeting card holiday. He was completely and utterly devoted to her.
