CHILDERS_Absurd Proposals

by Richard F. Weyand

  "However, I had a realization when I stepped off the shuttle on that planet. It hit me in an intuitive flash, and I knew I was right. I have not said a word about it in the three years since to anyone, not to either of you, not to Admiral Durand, not even to Bill. I'm not sure whether they know or not.

  "When we began thinking of where to locate the headquarters and operations hub for Galactic Mail, it struck me this planet was the perfect place. The technology was there, the knowledge and skills were there, the shipyards were there. It's also on the other side of Jablonka from Earth, about a hundred and thirty light-years closer to the New Colonies than Earth is. Admiral Durand and I have been going back and forth to The Yards negotiating a site for Galactic Mail. We have inspected and approved a suitable site, and we have an agreement to site there."

  "That's great news," Turner said.

  "Agreed. It sounds perfect," Desai said.

  "All of this Admiral Durand knows, Bill knows, and some handful of others. What they may not know is the actual identity of the planet. It is that to which I must, for the time being, swear you to secrecy.

  "For The Yards is actually Doma, and its capital is Nadezhda."

  "Doma! But that's a myth," Desai said.

  "No, Doma was real," Turner said. "Nadezhda is where the Commonwealth Charter was signed. But Earth destroyed it."

  "The Charter was signed in Jezgra," Desai said. "There's a monument to it."

  They both turned to Jan.

  "Doma is real," Jan said. "It is the most truly Earth-like planet the human race has ever discovered. I was born and raised on Earth. The Earth history I studied said Doma was real, but it was destroyed during the Insurrection, in retaliation for the Charter.

  "When Admiral Durand took me there three years ago, it was so much like Earth, so much more like Earth than any other planet I had been on, it grabbed at me, Earth born and raised. And it hit me in a flash the planet had to be Doma.

  "Earth history still claims the Earth navy destroyed Doma. It blasted its cities, destroyed its infrastructure. But the people had seen the Earth fleet coming days out, and had evacuated the cities. They rebuilt, with massive help from the Commonwealth after the war was over. But they asked the fledgling Commonwealth government to keep their survival a secret. They renamed their planet, renamed their cities, and remained hidden to protect themselves from Earth. The Commonwealth government erased them from the history books, deleted their coordinates, and raised a monument to the Charter in Jezgra instead.

  "The secret planet was a boon to the CSF. It had a secret location with an educated, trained population. The Commonwealth committed huge funds in R&D to the Navy under the early government. Those moneys were used to aid in rebuilding Doma, now called The Yards. It was carried on the books as The Yards. It only made sense to spend tremendous sums of money to build a secret shipyard. The extra money spent on rebuilding the planet was offset by money saved in having an educated, trained population in place already.

  "The Yards built all of the Commonwealth's warships from that point on. New-build ships came from The Yards. Where are The Yards? Shh, it's a secret.

  "But in fact The Yards is Doma. It's capital, now named Phoenix, rose from the ashes of Nadezhda. I went there, to The Yards, with Admiral Durand and Bill. I offered that the headquarters of Galactic Mail be built there, but only if they emerged from the shadows to become a public planet, as Galactic Mail couldn't operate out of a secret planet. They required in turn that I be given an initial term of office as chief executive of Galactic Mail, to which you both agreed.

  "But on a site inspection trip, I met with the Prime Minister privately. Just the two of us. She wanted to tell me – just me, for the moment – they have also decided to change the name of their planet back to Doma, and to change the names of their cities back to their original names. Their three biggest cities are Nadezhda, Vera, and Istina."

  "Hope, Faith, and Truth. I remember my history," Turner said.

  "Correct. And the headquarters site for Galactic Mail will be Nadezhda, on Doma, about thirty miles from where the Charter of the Commonwealth was signed, in secret, in violation of Earth law."

  "So the Commonwealth has thirty-three planets?" Desai asked.

  "Yes. The Commonwealth has always had thirty-three planets, from the very beginning. And only a very few people in the CSF knew. And I'm not sure the actual identity of the thirty-third planet was passed on. I can't tell you right now whether Bill or Admiral Durand knows or not. Without the benefit of having studied history on Earth, they may not.

  "But I just received a mail from Prime Minister Petros telling me the legislature has overwhelmingly decided to come out of the shadows, and also to resume their historic names. She asked me in that mail to share this with you, so you wouldn't be caught by surprise when it happens."

  "That is an amazing story. Thirty-three planets. I can't get over that," Desai said.

  "Boy, I'll say. Earth history is all wrong, too. There's gonna be some wild reactions to that announcement," Turner said.

  "And they're not worried about the planet becoming a target again?" Desai asked.

  "With hundreds of Galactic Mail ready drones sitting in the system, on call to defend all of the other systems? They are extremely unlikely to be a target. And being a hidden planet has hindered them in a lot of ways. Trade, foreign policy, other things," Jan said.

  "Of course. I can see that."

  "They are going to announce themselves soon," Jan said. "They wanted you both to know, so when your staff comes rushing in to tell you about it, you can say, 'Well, of course. I knew that.'"

  Turner laughed a hearty laugh.

  "Oh, I can see that happening. I'll have to work out exactly what I'll say. It'll be one for the history books. Maybe 'Oh, did I forget to mention that? How careless of me.'" Turner said.

  At that, Desai laughed.

  "Jake, you really work at that boisterous-bumpkin facade of yours, don't you?" Desai asked.

  "Of course. One must keep up appearances, after all."

  Desai and Jan both laughed.

  Staff Meeting

  The meeting was in one of the Class 1 secure conference rooms in one of the basements of the NOC. Jan called the meeting. Attending were Vice Admiral Tien Jessen, of Jan's black strategy group; Vice Admiral William Campbell, Chief of Staff for the Intelligence Division and Jan's husband; Admiral Jeanette Xi, head of the Tactical Division; Admiral Nancy Joshi, head of the Colonies Division; Admiral Pablo Johnson, head of Facilities and Construction; Admiral Sandra Faletti, Head of the Personnel Division.

  "Thank you all for coming," Jan said. "I have an announcement to make, something to brief you on, and a proposal to make to all of you.

  "First, after over thirty years in the CSF, I will be retiring in the next few months. I have had a great run, I have done everything I could have dreamed of doing and more, and I have served with some of the finest people anyone could ever hope to meet. But it's time to step down."

  That got their attention. They all, except Bill, stared at her as if she had suddenly grown horns. She had been CNO for ten years. During that time, the Commonwealth had been invaded by and defeated the Earth, had been invaded by and defeated the Outer Colonies, had completely and radically reinvented space travel, and had established over a hundred New Colonies.

  "I now want to play you the video of a briefing I recently gave on a proposal I made to Chairman Desai and President Turner."

  Jan sat down, the lights dimmed, and the large wall display showed her presentation to Prime Minister Petros and her ministers on Doma. Petros had recorded it, and provided the recording to Jan.

  " – I would propose to you The Yards is the ideal location for Galactic Mail to set up its operations, and I would suggest it may be time for you to come out of the shadows."

  With that the video ended and the lights came back up. Jan stood.

  "The Yards has been the name of the hidden planet where all CSF new ship construction h
as been done from the beginning of the Commonwealth. Literally, new ships come into Jablonka from The Yards. What I will tell you now, and which I must ask you to hold in confidence for the time being, is The Yards is actually Doma, the thirty-third planet of the Commonwealth, rebuilt in secret after the War of Independence, and remaining hidden until now."

  That caused a babble around the table, all except for Bill. He sat with a completely slack expression on his face, as if he had been hit over the head with a plank and just hadn't fallen down yet.

  Ha! Gotcha! Jan thought.

  "Agreement has been reached between the Commonwealth and Earth, and between Galactic Mail and Doma. I will become the President and Chief Operating Officer of Galactic Mail. I am moving to Doma, and I will build there a headquarters and operations center outside of Nadezhda, the capital city, the city where the Charter of the Commonwealth of Free Planets was signed.

  "The CSF and the ESN will be downsizing drastically. The defense of all human planets against interplanetary attack will be the primary mission of Galactic Mail, a mission in which I will not fail.

  "Chairman Desai has encouraged me to consider the CSF a giant labor pool from which to draw the people and expertise Galactic Mail needs. Sorry, Sandy."

  The head of Personnel Division chuckled and waved a hand.

  "Toward that end, I will need a Vice President, a head of Intelligence and Security, a head of Defense Operations, a head of Freight Operations, a head of Facilities and Construction, and a head of Personnel."

  Jan waved a hand to Xi, Bill, Jessen, Joshi, Johnson, and Faletti in turn as she spoke.

  "I don't need a decision today, but you should think about it. If you are afraid you will be abandoning the CSF and leaving the Commonwealth in the lurch, I have two points to make. One is each of you have competent subordinates who can take over your duties, as do I. I know, I checked. Second, Chairman Desai supports this fully, and she told me she would make herself personally available to any of you who wanted to talk to her about it.

  "On the personal side, if you retire from the CSF and sign on to Galactic Mail, you will collect your full pension from the CSF even as you earn corporate salaries from Galactic Mail. I was a little shocked to discover just how nice those corporate salaries are. I don't think anyone will be disappointed. You will move to Doma with me, and we will build that organization, to meet those goals."

  Jan pointed to the display as she finished, the display in which they had just seen her announce the ultimate goals of Galactic Mail were: 1) the massive expansion of the human race throughout the galaxy; 2) the suppression of the formation of any smothering multi-planet central government; and 3) ultimately ending war and armed conflict in space.

  "To build a brand-new spaceport, headquarters buildings, logistics buildings, from the ground up, and a massive orbital facility thrown in for good measure?" Johnson said. "That's the biggest set of building blocks a kid like me could ever hope to play with. I'm in, Admiral, and I appreciate being asked. I've been there, everybody, although I didn't know everything that was going on, and I'll tell you it's a beautiful planet. Just wonderful. It'll be like vacation every day."

  "You know I'm in, Ma'am," Bill said. "I mean, if you're moving, I'm moving. It's just nice to know I have a job at the other end."

  Everyone chuckled. Most of those at the table knew just how much of a team Jan and Bill had always been.

  "Don't you want somebody younger as your VP, Jan?" Xi asked. "I'm fifteen years older than you are. I only keep showing up for work because I'm too stupid not to. Don't you want younger blood for something like this?"

  "I have a ten-year term going in, Jeannie. While we're getting started, I need a steady hand when I'm not around. Give me five years, then you can retire in place. It's a wonderful planet, a true pseudo-Earth. Even better: .98g gravity and less axial tilt than Earth. We'll bring somebody younger along as your chief of staff, and we can bring them up to speed together."

  "Bev Bhatia," Xi said. "Ask Bev to come along. Junior VP or something. She's perfect."

  "That," Jan said, "is a great idea. Why don't you pop out to Waldheim and snag her? I think she's got her twenty-four in."

  "Yes, she does. Just. I've been worried about losing her. But I don't need to run out there. Either you or I can just call her back."

  "Right. Why didn't I think of that? So are you in, Jeannie?"

  "Yes, I'm in. I just wanted to make sure you weren't making a mistake. And I've been getting some push from Ron to retire or do something different anyway."

  "Excellent. Thanks, Jeannie."

  "I'm in, too, Ma'am," Sandra Faletti said. "It's more fun to hire people than to muster them out."

  "You're going to set up a freight system among all human planets, Ma'am?" Joshi asked.

  "Yes, Admiral."

  "There's no way I can pass that up. I'm in, Ma'am," Joshi said.

  Everybody turned to look at Jessen, who was staring at the blank display wall. Joshi cleared her throat, and Jessen turned to see everyone staring at him."

  "What? Oh. No, I'm in, Ma'am. I thought you knew that," Jessen said.

  "I didn't know you knew what was going on," Jan said.

  "Oh, I didn't know what was going on, but I knew something was going on. I just didn't want to get left behind when the shuttle lifted."

  Everybody laughed at that.

  "Well, we don't have anywhere to go, yet," Jan said. "Pablo, put your teams to work on designing us a headquarters and a space port. We need something to work with as soon as possible, whatever you can throw together quick, and then we need to expand it, and expand it again. Build that in from the get-go. We've got enough room, we can just build one site to get started, then go right on to build the new one next to it."

  "Yes, Ma'am. We're on it."

  Bill stopped in to Durand's office when he got back to the Intelligence Building.

  "I hope this doesn't make me unpopular, but I need to take Lyman," Bill said.

  "For corporate security? Of course, you do. No problem. His junior is good, and Stefan just ran out of career track. And he's got his twenty-four," Durand said. "So she's staffing, eh? Who's in so far?"

  "Jessen, Joshi, Faletti, Xi, Bhatia, Pablo Johnson, me."

  "That's a nice start. I would have thought Xi was too old, but she's a steady hand."

  "That's what Jan said. She'll be Jan's number two to get started, and they're going to bring along Bhatia as Jan's second in five years," Bill said.

  "Smart. I like it."

  "I'm gonna miss it around here."

  "Nah. You'll have fun with it. And if you ever need any help, I know a good consultant you can hire over there," Durand said.

  "You do?"

  "Yes. Me. I'm retiring, and I was thinking about where to retire to. Now they're coming out from hiding, I'm thinking about retiring to The Yards. Beautiful place, and you can't beat the weather."

  "That's unexpected," Bill said.

  "No, I've been planning on retiring for a while. And then this job would have been yours. But all the action is going to be with Galactic Mail, and you'll be in the thick of it over there. So if you need any help, I'll be around."

  Getting Started

  Earth was shipping out so much construction equipment and construction supplies to the New Colonies, the initial needs of Galactic Mail were hardly noticed. One of the huge freighters arrived in orbit at The Yards and started setting out blocks of containers on the spots marked by CSF surveyors.

  The CSF construction crews arrived and knocked out a tent city for themselves in a couple of days. Some crews moved on to clearing ground, laying base gravel and prefab rebar grids, and pouring concrete for prefab warehouse buildings. Other crews were clearing ground for shuttle pads for the big container shuttles. Acres of base gravel, delivered by shuttles with dump containers, were graded out and rolled, followed by prefab rebar grids. Pavement machines starting laying concrete in wide swaths across what had been grassland days before.
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  Still more crews began running a road into Phoenix from both ends and from several intermediate spots, bulldozing the grade and laying base gravel using more shuttles with dump containers. Prefab rebar grids were laid as fast as they could be put down and wired together. Within a week, multi-lane pavement machines were started from several points, being fed concrete from shuttles. They ran day and night, inching along the right of way. When the first two-lane pavement with broad shoulders was completed, they moved a hundred feet to one side and started again.

  As the huge climate-controlled warehouses went up, they were set up as bunkhouses, and more construction crews were brought in. The CSF motto seemed to be "more people get things done faster." As long as the crews could stay out of each other's way, that seemed to work. New crews started new projects, including the simultaneous construction of dozens of temporary apartment buildings, a sewage treatment facility, a water treatment facility, an electrical generating plant. It was all going up at the same time, just as fast as the materials could be unloaded and assembled.

  A large area was cleared with bush-hogger attachments on tractors. Water and septic lines were laid and electric lines installed. The entire space was graveled over. Crews then began pulling hundreds of twelve-by-eighty prefab houses out of containers and setting them up on the site.

  Construction workers from across the Commonwealth flooded in to Jablonka and were transported to The Yards. For everyone who showed up, they had a job. An extra colony passenger ship was donated by Earth, and it made a regular shuttle run between Jablonka and The Yards. Another made a regular shuttle run between Earth and The Yards, bringing more workers.

  Desai was able to get away with all of this without Council approval, because she was building a base on a Commonwealth planet. The Charter had given the Chairman as commander-in-chief broad discretion on the military, to forestall the sort of logrolling that occurred when legislatures had control of military decisions.