Keeping Score

by Violet Paige

“Yes, I’d like a cup.”

  I nodded to the waitress to bring us two cups.

  “So, tell me Ms. Martin. Why did you make up this story?”

  I wasn’t the kind of man to hold back my emotions or my thoughts. I knew when someone was conning me. And this woman wasn’t taking my son from me.

  She slammed her fist on the table and hissed, “My son was kidnapped. I didn’t make it up.”

  “Yeah, that part of your story checks out. But why do you think it’s my son? Why did you contact DC policy last night? Hunter has been in the system for three years. There is no record of anyone ever trying to contact him, meet him, reach out to him. Nothing.” I glared at her.

  She pulled the wool cap over her forehead. “How was I supposed to know he was in DC?”

  She had met me on I-95, just south of Fredericksburg. I was surprised no one had spotted me yet.

  I leaned back, crossing my arms. I didn’t buy it. None of it. “You’re not that far away. Tell me what it is you want.”

  “I want my child,” she seethed.

  “Hunter isn’t yours,” I countered.

  If Julie knew I was here she would kill me. But I had to get to the bottom of this myself. The investigator had reluctantly given me the mother’s name: Martha Martin. The rest I did myself with a little web search.

  “You don’t know that.” She wasn’t backing down.

  We waited while the coffee was served until we resumed our argument. “I know that kid has had a shitty life. He’s been in and out of foster homes. He didn’t have clothes. He wasn’t eating. Shit, he barely spoke a sentence when I met him. But you know what? He’s happy now. And you’re crazy as hell, woman if you think I’m going to let you ruin that with some kind of insane claim.”

  She leaned over the table. “You think the courts are going to take your side over mine?”

  “It’s not going to get that far. Name your price. I know that’s why you’re really here.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “Don’t pretend you’re shocked. I know bullshit. Fuck, I invented bullshit. Hunter isn’t your kid. You saw him on TV. You saw the story on how I’m trying to adopt him and you thought you could cash in on that.”

  Her eyes darted wildly.

  I pulled out a file I had received from the lead investigator and slapped it on the table. “In here is a list of some of your pettier crimes. Check fraud. Shop lifiting. I think I saw an attempted breaking and entering. So I’m going to put my money on the fact that this was the biggest opportunity you’d ever seen and you thought you could walk away with some serious money.”

  “I lost my son three years ago,” she spoke slowly. “How can you say any of this to me?”

  I nodded. “I know. I’m sorry about that. I can’t imagine what it’s like to lose a child. But you know what that feels like. So why in God’s name would you try to put me through it?” I sat for a minute before I continued. “I’ll write you a check right now. A huge check. You take it and cash it in the morning and then you call the police and tell them you were mistaken. That you were so emotional you made a mistake.”

  I pulled out my checkbook. I wrote in the date and her name on the top line.

  “But what if he is mine?” She looked at me.

  “Martha, we both know that Hunter is yours.”

  She closed her eyes and nodded.

  “I’m not going to report you. I’m not even going to consider this extortion. This is a gift from me to you.” I made sure there were lots of zeros on the end before tearing it from the book.

  I handed it to her.

  “Why are you doing this?” she asked, her voice shaky.

  “Because. I’d do anything in this world for that kid. I haven’t always been like this. I’ve made mistakes. And I’m trying to help you from making any more. Start over, Martha. Start over. Make your son proud of you.”

  She teared up and folded the check, tucking it inside her shirt.

  “Thank you,” she whispered and then walked out of the diner.

  I sat across from the empty booth and finished drinking my coffee.

  When I walked through the door at the loft Julie jumped from the couch. Hunter was asleep with a book across from his chest.

  “Where have you been?” she questioned me.

  “It’s a long story.” I hung up my coat. “But I took care of everything. We don’t have to worry about losing Hunter,” I whispered.

  “I don’t understand.” She shook her head. “What happened?”

  I took her by the hand and led her to the bedroom so Hunter couldn’t hear us in case he awakened.

  “The woman who claimed to be Hunter’s birth mother wasn’t. She won’t be bothering us. She’s dropping the claims.”

  “Oh my God. How did you find out?”

  “I went to see her.” I smirked.

  “And you didn’t tell me?”

  Shit. I thought it would make her happy, but I saw the anger in her eyes.

  “I didn’t want to get your hopes up or down or whatever roller coaster this is.” I tried to soothe her.

  “You drove to see Hunter’s possible mother and didn’t think I could handle the roller coaster?”

  “Ok. Fuck. When you say it like that it sounds shitty. But, baby, I was trying to help. And I did. It’s over. He’s ours.”

  “He is not ours.” Her hands flew to her hips. “I’m not on the papers. I’m not even listed for guardianship. And what you did tonight, shows me exactly where you think I fall on the list of people you need to consult. At the bottom.” Her eyes flared.

  “God, no. I was trying to take care of you.”

  “This isn’t how you do it, Hawk. You don’t just make all the decisions yourself. There’s a child involved. You said we were doing this together. And right now I feel completely alone in this. You went out on your own. You didn’t ask. You didn’t need me. You didn’t want my input.” She sat on the edge of the bed. “I don’t know why I’m here.”

  Fuck.

  “You’re here because he needs you.” I lowered my voice. “You’re here because I need you.”

  Her sapphire eyes lifted to mine, cutting me right through the chest. Did she know she could take my breath away with one look?

  “You don’t act like you need me. You act like a man who is used to being alone. Who doesn’t know what family looks like.”

  I knelt in front of her.

  “You’re right. I don’t. I never had a real family. I never had Christmas. I never had someone like you.”

  I tilted her chin toward me. “Don’t shut me out now, Jules. Not when we just got our shit together.”

  I thought I saw a grin tug at the corners of her beautiful lips.

  “Hunter’s been asleep for two hours.”

  “I’ll carry him upstairs. Don’t move.”

  I walked to the living room where the boy was curled under a blanket. The tree twinkled next to him. I lifted him into my arms and took the stairs two at a time. His eyes opened for a second when I lowered him to the bed. I pulled the covers up to his chin and he rolled on his side.

  “Good night, son.” I kissed him on the head, turned off the light, and closed the door.

  Forty

  Julie

  Hawk walked back into the bedroom and locked the door behind him. My emotions were twisted inside me.

  I was still angry, but it was nestled inside relief. He had saved Hunter from a legal battle. He had kept him safe. He had fulfilled his promise to me.

  “He’s out,” he reported.

  I nodded. “He read until he fell asleep.”

  I shivered as his glorious green eyes raked over my body. I got lost in the depths of them every time he looked at me that way.

  “Come with me.” He offered me his hand.

  “What are you doing?” I wasn’t ready to shed the resentment I had. He had hurt me. Whether intentional or not, it didn’t just go away.

  “We’re getting in a hot shower together.�
� He turned the hot water knob and waited for the steam to rise. “And I’m going to wash your body.”

  I cocked my head sideways. “I don’t know about that.”

  His fingers fastened on the button on my blouse. “I’m going to take care of you always. Even when you’re angry. I promise you won’t walk out of that shower still mad at me.” He winked.

  I didn’t know if it was the challenge. But I stepped out of my jeans and into the shower. He couldn’t seduce away the hurt feelings.

  But I was wrong. So wrong.

  Hawk climbed in after me. His massive shoulders taking up much of the space in the shower. He lathered soap in his hands and then placed them on my shoulders.

  “Just relax,” he ordered, spinning me toward the wall.

  I turned around giving him my back. His hands felt like magic as they worked their way down my spine and then back up across my shoulders, up my neck.

  He dropped to his knees and continued rubbing the soap into my skin. My legs and feet have never been cleaned this well in their whole existence. I’m sure of it.

  When he reached up to clean between my legs I inhaled sharply.

  I whimpered a little as he ran his fingers along each side of my pussy lips and then pulled back to rub across my clit. My breathing became more erratic with each caress of his hand. I wished he would reach back just a little more and slide a finger inside of me or his cock.

  Anything.

  I squirmed back and forth causing him to chuckle.

  “My little minx,” he growled, turning me around to face him. His mouth captured mine in a kiss so blistering hot I didn’t know how the walls didn’t go up in flames around us. When he pulled away he presses me back against the wall.

  “Sit.” He ordered.

  I didn’t hesitate. If there was one thing I had learned it was to listen to this man when he spoke. I sat on the bench built into the shower, and watched as he knelt before me. When he lowered his head between my legs I wanted to scream and cry. I wanted him.

  Then I felt his tongue dart out against my clit. I spread my legs wide for him, eager for more.

  Once.

  Twice.

  He sucked me into his mouth and bit down ever so gently but enough that I knew he had me and that I couldn’t pull away. With my clit clamped tight between his teeth he flicked his tongue against me over and over.

  My hands gripped at his hair while the hot water splattered around us.

  “No. Don’t stop. Don’t ever fucking stop.” I breathed. My forgiveness was growing.

  “Mmm.” He moaned as he sucked me back into his mouth while I rode his face with frantic force.

  I glanced down at this amazing man before me as he knelt in the shower, steam cascading all around us and I realized how much I loved him.

  How hard I had been falling. Why I was so angry with him when he went out on his own. Why all of it mattered so much. I loved Kane Hawkins.

  I didn’t think this man knew what in the hell he was doing to me. Every single time he touched me he took another piece of my heart and firmly stored it away. It wouldn’t be such a big deal if I knew how the hell he felt or where he thought this was going.

  With all the stuff going on with Hunter we hadn’t had a chance to sit down and talk about anything and that worried me. What if we weren’t on the same page? What if tonight was the beginning of that? What if Hawk did everything on his own and couldn’t find a way to let me in?

  I wanted to know him. I wanted this. I wanted him.

  My hips jutted forward.

  “Fuck, yes, baby. Yes,” he groaned against my pussy.

  My head fell backward as I offered myself to him again. He was relentless, pushing my knees wide.

  His tongue darted while his fingers pushed inside me. Twisting and pumping tighter and faster. Harder and deeper.

  “Don’t stop. Don’t stop. I’m coming,” I cried.

  With one powerful lick he sent me over the edge. My body convulsed and quivered. I gasped for breath. I searched for gravity. But I was floating in a blissful haze.

  Hawk’s eyes locked on mine. He lowered my feet to the tiles, where the hot water pooled at my toes. He kissed my stomach and then each nipple, drawing closer to my lips.

  “I love you, Julie.”

  I gasped. “Oh, God.”

  “I do. I’m sorry I screwed up. But damn, I’m so in love with you.”

  My arms wrapped around his neck. “I love you too. So much.”

  “I didn’t mean to be a dick.”

  I kissed him tenderly, tasting the soap and traces of myself on his lips. “I know. Don’t leave me out next time.”

  “I won’t.”

  He picked me up, cutting off the water with his free hand. He grabbed up two towels on his way out of the shower. “I bought you another early Christmas present.”

  “You did?”

  He nodded. “Mmhmm. This one has two settings. I think you’ll like it. And I swear it’s whisper quiet.”

  My body tingled. “What every girl wants for Christmas.” I giggled.

  “As long as my girl wants it, that’s all I care about.”

  “I love you, Hawk. Now take me to bed and fuck me with everything you have.”

  He laughed loudly. “Done, baby. You don’t have to say that twice.”

  Epilogue

  Two weeks later

  I stretched out and looked at the sleeping goddess next to me. It was game day. It was Christmas day. Seemed like a double win. I reached my hand around my waist to draw her toward me when I heard pounding on the bedroom door.

  “Shit,” I muttered.

  Julie yanked the covers and wrapped the sheet around her bare breasts, eyeing me. “He’s excited.” She smiled.

  “I want my game day ritual,” I groaned, trying to pry my hand between her legs. The door was locked.

  She swatted at me and giggled. “Later. We have an eight-year-old on Christmas morning.”

  We climbed out of bed and dressed.

  “We’ll be right out,” Julie called through the door.

  As soon as we opened it Hunter was jumping up and down in the hallway. “You won’t believe what’s out there.”

  “What is it?” I asked.

  “An Xbox.”

  Julie laughed. “No way.”

  “Come on. Come on.” He tugged on both of our wrists. We followed him to the living room.

  The tree was lit. The fire was roaring. There was snow on the ground. And I had the two most important people in my life gathered under the tree.

  Hunter landed on the floor in awe of the gifts sprinkled around. We didn’t want to go overboard, but I don’t think we did a very good job of reining it in. There were enough toys here for all the kids at the group home. I wanted him to have everything I didn’t. Maybe it was excessive, but I couldn’t help it.

  Julie’s hands wrapped around my waist. She leaned into my back. “Merry Christmas.”

  I pulled her around to face me. “Come here.” I dipped to kiss her.

  “I have a present for you,” she announced.

  She bent by the tree and rifled through the gifts. She rose, holding a box tied with a blue ribbon.

  “Wait. I want you to open mine first.”

  I ran to the mantle and grabbed the box. I had put it there last night when everyone had fallen asleep.

  “But—”

  “No, please. Open it first.”

  “But this is really something you’ll like,” she protested.

  “I know I will, baby, but please.”

  She shrugged. “Ok.”

  Hunter was busy with a set of cars that raced each other on the track. We had our own moment on the couch. The two presents rested between us.

  As soon as she held the box in her hand my chest tightened. My life was getting ready to change. The lid on the box cracked as her eyes widened.

  “Oh my God,” she gasped.

  I dropped to my knee. “Will you marry me?”

>   I plucked the diamond from the velvet cushion and held it toward her finger.

  She nodded, the tears filling her eyes. “Yes. Oh my God. Yes.”

  I slipped the ring on her finger. It looked good. Huge. Glittery. Expensive.

  She looked at me nervously. “Now you have to open mine.”

  “Got it.”

  I tore the paper from the box and dropped the lid on the floor. My jaw fell. I stared inside.

  My eyes met hers. “This is for real?”

  She nodded. “It is.”

  I picked up the stick with two double lines on it. “You’re pregnant?”

  “I took it yesterday.”

  And I thought the ring was a big deal. What the fuck did I know?

  “This is unbelievable.”

  “But unbelievable good, right?” Her voice was shaky.

  “I’ve never had a better Christmas ever.” I kissed her, pressing my lips against hers. “I love you, baby.”

  “I love you too.”

  Hunter walked over. “What is going on?”

  “We’re getting married, bud. And having a baby.”

  His eyes widened. “Wow.”

  It was pretty fucking wow.

  Julie pulled him into a hug. She didn’t seem to have to ask him anymore. He fell into her embrace just like he had always belonged there.

  “Are you ok with all of this news, honey?”

  He nodded. “I get to stay?”

  “Oh, yes. Of course. That doesn’t change. It just means you have a baby brother or sister now,” she explained.

  “Can we open more presents?”

  We both laughed. He was eight after all. On to another topic before we had even digested the first one.

  “Yeah, let’s do that. I’ve got a game this afternoon.”

  Hunter fastened a Santa hat to his head and started sorting the presents under the tree.

  “Hold on, bud. We’ll be right back.”

  Julie looked at me questioningly. I ushered her back to our room.

  “What’s wrong? Are you upset about the baby?”

  “God no. The opposite.”

  My mouth landed on hers as I pulled her into my arms. My hands coasted to her breasts, squeezing tenderly, flicking over her nipple. She groaned as my tongue twisted along hers.