Indulgence

by Liz Crowe

  Gray’s eyes roam across the stage until his gaze lands on me. His eyes heat, making me drop my gaze to his guitar. Big mistake, Daisy. I watch his hand glide up the and down the neck, paying special attention to each note just as he would every inch of my body. The thought makes me squirm and I inwardly scold myself. Where the hell are these thoughts coming from? I can’t be thinking thoughts like this about Gray! The pull I felt, nearly instantly, for him is so strong I don’t understand it. He says that he feels it too, but it doesn’t make it right. It just means that I have to fight it that much harder.

  Hunter’s voice breaks through the haze as he plays up the ladies. “Look at all of the sexy kittens, boys. Are you all here for me?” he asks, rolling his hips earning him a few screams. Two blondes flash him making him smile wickedly. “Uh oh…” The cocky bastard scolds clicking his tongue, “You naughty kitties need a tongue lashing.” Looking over to Henry, he points to them. “These two, Shaft Approved… See to it, Henry.” Henry nods in agreement. My eyes immediately go to my shirt. Shit! “Now hold on to somethin’, Shaft’s comin’!”

  I watch from my stool as Shaft completely commands the stage. Song after song they own every person in the audience, me included. My thoughts drift to Landon, but I make no move to find him. I assume he is behind the scenes working. I remind myself it is probably best that I leave him to it. Not a great idea to give Tad anymore reason to hate me.

  After a few songs Aiden and Hunter exit the stage, leaving Gray alone. Walking up to the mic, he scans the crowd. “You’ve been great tonight, Springfield. How ‘bout one from just me?” The ladies scream, making him smile. “Oh alright, if you insist.” Turning to me he winks and starts to play.

  Time stands still as Gray’s voice flows around me. The words of ‘Better Than Me’ by Hinder, rolling over every inch of me. I soak it up as he sings. Gray’s voice isn’t raspy like Hunter’s but it is raw and edgy just the same. Every ounce of emotion pours from his lips, only drawing me in further. I am mesmerized by him as he sings about being unworthy of the only one he really wants. Emotion claws at my throat and I nearly forget about the five thousand fans all watching him. For the few minutes Gray sings, his eyes never leaving mine, I forget all about Landon and hate myself for it.

  My mind wanders away from this day, and the fights with Landon, to a place I shouldn’t let it go. I’m back at the bar on that old couch again but it isn’t with Landon, it is Gray’s hands on me. His mouth on mine, our bodies pressed close together. I must be crazy because I am fucking loving it. Then I really go for it. I let myself imagine running my tongue along every inch of his naked tattooed body as those steel eyes roam over every inch of me. My entire body burns under his gaze. I can feel the rough tips of his fingers caressing my body as I ride his cock. Our panting breaths, I’m gasping and moaning as he thrusts up into me making me…

  “Thank you,” Gray murmurs faintly almost like he is far away… Oh my God, am I really hearing Gray say this? There is no way that Aiden’s joke from earlier, about Landon thanking me for orgasms, is ruining this fantasy for me right now!

  “No thank you needed,” I mutter in my lusty haze.

  “Daisy... You ready?”

  “Again?” I ask excitedly. Oh yes, my fantasy Gray has a quick rebound. He already wants another go?

  “Daisy, are you OK?” Gray chuckles. “You’re panting and really flushed.” The words snapping me from my erotic daydream meeting Gray’s very pleased expression. I know my thoughts are all over my face, all while he is reading me like a book. I am so going to hell for my little fantasies about Grayson Cole. I can feel the blush spread across my cheeks as I meet Gray’s amused smirk. “Hungry?” he asks me, arching a brow; I can barely nod a response.

  Chapter Four

  Overinflated Rock God

  Henry loads Gray, Hunter, Aiden, the two Shaft Approved blondes, along with me into an SUV and we pull out onto the street. I haven’t seen Landon or Tad in hours. I am curious as to where the hell they are. “Where’s Tad and Landon?” I ask Henry.

  His lifts his shades up a bit and sighs, “Tad has to deal with No Approval’s manager, guessin’ Landon’s with him,” he answers with a shrug.

  I sink back into the seat crossing my arms over my chest. “Cold?” Gray asks, handing me his leather jacket.

  “Thanks” I say, shrugging it on. Even if I was sweating like a hooker on the front row pew I would never walk into a restaurant deeming myself ‘Shaft Approved’. Shit, why didn’t I just go back to the bus and change?

  I watch the reflections on the street lights run along the window of the SUV as Henry barrels down the highway. Letting my thoughts take over once again; I need to talk to Landon but I don’t know what to say. I don’t even know what I’m doing that is so wrong in the first place, so how can I fix anything? He wouldn’t talk to me, he yelled then left me. I am supposed to get on board, but with what? This is uncharted territory, Landon and I never had issues like this before. We disagreed but not over anything major. Hell, until today, I don’t think I remember him raising his voice. Now he is so angry and tense that if I didn’t know any better I would think he was a totally different person.

  “We’re going to get bacon, Daisy, there’s no sulking in the presence of bacon. It’s gotta be a law some-fuckin’-where. You need to eat. Then you can go back to the bus and fuck Landon into a coma,” Hunter shouts. I feel Gray tense as we climb out making a run for the diner.

  Gray has an arm wrapped around my shoulders as the hostess leads us back to a long corner booth. I sink into the seat and he slides in beside me. “You alright?” he asks, draping his arm around the cushion behind me, his fingers twirling a strand of my hair.

  “I’m fine, Gray, just wish I talked to Landon before we left. I don’t like leaving things unresolved,” I mutter as the waitress comes to take drink orders.

  Hunter grabs her hand sweetly. “Kitten, all I want is a plate of cheese fries and some bacon. Lots of bacon! Plates of it! I mean, if there’s bacon in the world, then world peace is in our reach.”

  “Hunter, you’ll die at forty of a coronary!” I huff out with a laugh.

  “Dasiy… I’m a fuckin’ ROCK GOD!” he says jumping to his feet. “We all know the bitches and liquor will kill me long before bacon can.” He grabs the waitress then twirls her around the room. “Oh kitten, be mine? Bring me bacon all night long and I’ll make you purr,” he says, kissing her cheek. The blonde bimbos giggle when he slides back into the booth. The waitress rolls her eyes while taking the rest of our orders.

  “Seriously, bro, put Cunter to bed; let’s just be cool for one night,” Aiden says, typing away on his phone.

  “Whatcha doin’ little brother?” Hunter asks trying to snatch the phone away. “Still textin’ that fuckin’ groupie?”

  “Nothin’ groupie about Camaron, the bitch is only approved by this shaft,” he teases. “Hands off my lady, Cunter,” Aiden turns toward Gray and me to resume his texting.

  “Camaron your girlfriend?” I ask. Hunter laughs before latching on to the neck of the bimbo on his right.

  “Nah, I don’t do girlfriends. We hooked up a couple months ago in a bar outside of New Orleans. She’s a fuckin’ wildcat,” Aiden says with a groan. “She’s meetin’ us tomorrow before we head out. Since we’re booked in Vegas for a whole week, Cam’s gonna come stay with me while she visits family or some shit. Works for me, I’m dying to rev her up again. Bitch purrs like a fuckin’ sports car.”

  “I’m so glad Landon doesn’t talk about me like that!” I shriek.

  Hunter looks up and winks at me, “Who says he doesn’t?”

  “Fuck you, Cunter,” I spit, making him laugh.

  “You’re off limits, Mrs. Cole,” he tosses out as he shoves out of the booth. “Come on, ladies.” He grabs their hands, leading them off to the bathroom.

  “Is he serious?” I ask as he pushes past a crowd of people paying their check.

  Gray nods, “Sorry. He’s, um, ov
erinflated.”

  “I mean about Landon…” Blushing at the thought of them all sitting around sharing sleazy sex stories. I love playing the freak in the sheets, but I don’t want it discussed on the street. Landon has a hard enough time handling changing positions, I honestly wouldn’t think he would talk about us, but what do I know?

  Gray fingers brush my cheek and he smiles at me. “Landon and I weren’t close growing up. I mostly lived with my Dad. Landon didn’t give two shits about my career until last year. I was shocked as shit when he came to see me with Tad in tow. Said that Tad wanted to represent Shaft and that was that. Now he’s interested? Up until the other day when he mentioned bringing you…” He shrugs, “Well I didn’t know anything, not even your name,” he says and I watch his cheeks heat. Wow! Grayson Cole is embarrassed.

  I nod. Letting the conversation go as our food arrives we all dig in. I hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast this morning, now I am starving. While I eat, I wonder why Landon hadn’t told me about Tad until he took the job with the band. He obviously knew him long before but didn’t he tell me Gray asked him to take the job? How could he have been there with Tad then? I keep up minimal conversation with the guys. Nodding along with what they are saying. Gray watches me, knowing something is up, but I just keep thinking things over in my head. When Henry leaves to go pay the check, Gray tucks me against him, walking me back out to the SUV. I am completely lost in trying to process everything. Just trying to think it all out makes me feel dizzy, along with completely exhausted.

  The changes in Landon are one thing but the fact that his own brother didn’t know that we are getting married shocks me. Okay, I get they weren’t close, but, even so, it should have been mentioned in passing before last night, right? I decide Landon and I are going to have a long talk so we can put this all behind us. Obviously, there will be growing pains in adjusting to being on tour. Nothing that we can’t handle, of course. We have a future to plan. In a few months all this will just be a memory anyway.

  “You’re awfully quiet, Wildflower,” Gray says when we pull up at the bus.

  “I’m fine. Just tired,” I murmur as I hop out of the car straightening my skirt.

  I look over at the bus where I see a blonde sitting on the steps with a bag at her feet. She is thumbing on a cell phone as she looks up and smiles. “’Bout fuckin’ time!” she says, jumping to her feet, shoving the phone into the back pocket of her jeans. “How ya supposed to surprise an asshole if he isn’t here?”

  Aiden smiles, all but running around Gray and me, scooping her up off her feet. He slams his mouth to hers as she leaps into his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist. “Cam, you sneaky bitch,” he growls, pulling back to look at Henry, “No fuckin’ way my first night with Cam is goin’ to be on that tiny bunk on the bus. Tonight we’re breakin’ the sound barrier and shatterin’ windows! Take us to a hotel, gotta fuck her proper the first dozen times or so.”

  “Softie,” Cam murmurs against Aiden’s mouth as Henry tosses her bag in the back of the SUV.

  Aiden ruts up against her. “Cock’s been neglected, Cam, nothin’ soft about it. You got helluva lot to make up for. Get in the damn car so you can say hello to me properly!” he says firmly, swatting her on the ass. They climb into the back seat and slam the door, leaving Henry shaking his head.

  Hunter rudely dismisses his fuck buddies without another word, shoving past me. The disgusting odor coming off of him is nauseating, “Jesus, Hunter, you smell like bleach blonde pussy and bacon,” I say, plugging my nose, trying not to gag on the stench of the cheap perfume they rubbed all over him.

  Rubbing his crotch, he grins. “Yeah, it’s been a great night. Nighty, night fuckers. Be sure to rock out with your cock out and always wrap your wiener,” he says stomping up the bus steps, flinging open the door. “Honey, I’m home, get off the mailman!”

  “Where the fuck is she?” I hear Landon scream from the bus.

  Gray’s eyes flit to mine and Landon flies out of the doorway and grabs my arm. “Where have you been, Daisy? I’ve been waiting here for hours!” he shouts. Gray looks down at his grip on my arm and I swear he growls. Landon shoves Gray’s leather jacket from my shoulders, letting it fall to the pavement.

  “What the fuck is your problem, Lan? Daisy watched the show, we put her stage left so no one touched her. She went to eat with us because you didn’t give a fuck ‘bout tendin’ to your girl,” Gray says, shoving at him, making Landon release my arm.

  “Stay the hell out of my business, Gray,” Landon spits angrily, his fists balling at his sides.

  Oh my god this isn’t happening. They are not fighting over me. I shove past them both as I stomp up the steps. “Both of you can go to hell. I’m standing right here! I can speak for myself. I’ll go wherever the fuck I want, Landon!” I say stomping to our room where I slam the door just to drive the point home.

  I kick my shoes off and shimmy out of my skirt. Grabbing a hair tie from my wrist, I pull my hair up in a messy-bun and slump to the bed. With all the adrenaline pumping through my system, all I wanted to do is kick the shit out of something now, but I am drained. No matter what I do I can’t win in this situation. Now, all I really want to do is pack my shit and leave. I don’t need this. Burying my face in the pillow I let go and cry. I sob loudly because, of course, I can’t be a cute quiet crier. I have to wail and have mascara pour off my face.

  “Ssh…Wildflower…” I hear, only making me cry harder. Why do I have to hear his voice calming me? Why can’t Landon come in here to tell me everything is going to be okay? Nope, I am all alone in here crying, fantasizing about my fiancé’s brother soothing me with his voice. Rough fingers rub soothing, slow circles on my back causing me jump up from the bed meeting Gray’s sad eyes. “I’m sorry.”

  “W-where’s L-landon?” I stutter through my tears.

  “Outside talkin’ to Tad. You alright?” he asks, handing me a tissue. “Stupid question…of course you aren’t,” he says, rolling his eyes at himself.

  I wipe my eyes and pull my legs up to my chest, wrapping my arms around my knees. Grayson’s eyes dart to my legs as his gaze moves up my thighs, he bites his lip ring making my stomach flip. “Wildflower, I am good with friends, naked friends even… but if you don’t put somethin’ on those fuckin’ amazin’ legs you got goin’ on, I can’t promise I won’t wrap them around my ears and eat you alive.”

  My eyes go wide as I look down realizing I am still in just the halter and a pair of very tiny red panties. I jerk the quilt over my legs making him blow out a breath. “Not a whole lot better, since I know what’s under there,” he says with a wink as he grabs my hand in his squeezing sweetly.

  The door opens, Landon walks in looking like a kicked puppy. “Can I talk to you?” he asks, eyeing Gray sitting with me on the bed. Gray’s fingers entwined with mine. “Am I interrupting something?”

  I shake my head. “Thanks Gray. I’m good. I’ll see you later,” I whisper as he nods and leaves the room.

  Landon sits on the edge of the bed, blowing out a shaky breath. “Daisy… I’ve been an asshole,” he says with his back to me.

  “That’s for sure fucker!” Hunter yells beating against the wall behind my head.

  Ignoring Hunter’s input, I lean up to kick the cover away and wrap my arms around Landon’s neck. “You’re under a lot of stress. I’m not helpin’ that. I’m sorry too, baby,” I whisper kissing his cheek.

  Landon pulls me into his arms settling me onto his lap. “I love you, Daisy. I’m sorry, too. Tad has been ridin’ me so hard. I just don’t know how to talk to you about it.”

  I look up into his beautiful blues leaning in to kiss him softly, “You can talk to me about anything, Landon. I know that this is all stressful. That you need me on board,” I cringe at the words I just used, hoping he doesn’t figure out that I heard them talking.

  “I do and it is,” he says, nuzzling my neck. “I don’t want this coming between us, Daisy. I’ve never felt abo
ut any woman the way that I feel about you.”

  “I love you too, Landon. Make love to me,” I whisper pulling his lips to mine.

  “Not here, Daisy. Please… I can’t…not like that,” he says pulling away from me. “Let’s just wait until we get to Vegas and have a hotel room for a week. Then everything will be perfect,” he says reassuring me, but even though I nod, the rejection hurts.

  “Vegas,” I reply.

  Landon nods, “Everything will change once we get to Vegas. You’ll see.” He rolls us on the bed pulling the blanket over us. Closing my eyes, I hope that Landon is right.

  Chapter Five

  X-rated Board Games and Outrageous Wagers.

  For days I have done nothing but hang with Cam in the bedroom or hang with the guys, while Tad keeps Landon busy with work for the tour. If I don’t get the hell off of this bus I’m going to lose my shit and kill off an entire city block! You’ve seen those people on the news snappin’ out and just goin’ ape shit? Well, I am realizing it was probably because they are stuck with a bunch of loud, obnoxious men who couldn’t wipe their own asses with both hands, even if they have a fuckin’ YouTube instructional video!

  Cam and I are becoming great friends already. We like a lot of the same things, and spend most of our days watching shows on Netflix or laughing at stupid shit online. After having done our nails, our hair, and organizing this ridiculous room, we both start to go nuts. I have no doubt that this plan was concocted by Landon and Tad to keep us stuck where they can hide us.

  “If I have to spend one more day on this bus I’m gonna cut Aiden off!” Cam screams as she bangs on the wall. “We haven’t stopped but to fill the gas tank! I need to breathe air that doesn’t smell like man ass and stale beer!”

  “Damn right!” I shout, flinging the door open. “Let’s go make our demands.” I yank her hand, tugging her up the aisle behind me.