Be Mine, Sweetheart (Something Borrowed)
Page 10
Hank’s suggestion that the two of them get naked in front of each other came unbidden to her mind as Chris shrugged. “Sure. I’ll be quick. Want me to use yours since the kitten is down here?”
She tried to remember if she’d left anything embarrassing like bras or underwear lying about.
Chris has seen my room a complete mess, so why am I stressing about underwear?
“That’s fine,” she said.
As Chris disappeared up the stairs, Kelly’s eyes gravitated to his butt. She couldn’t see much, since his jeans were loose fitting, but she could imagine it was as tight and firm as the rest of him.
Once he was out of sight, she groaned. It was about time that she admitted that she had the hots for Chris. Fighting it wasn’t working, so she might as well embrace it.
What that meant, she had no idea yet.
Her phone chirped and it was Hank.
Hey Gorgeous. Would you like to meet me for dinner tomorrow?
I don’t think that’s a good idea.
You can bring Julia’s giant folder if it will make you feel better. Then you can pretend it’s a work dinner while I entertain you with tales of our future with five children.
Kelly smiled, her brain protesting as her heart begged her to let loose for once.
Fine, I will meet you for dinner.
Fantastic. Is it pushing my luck if I tell you I haven’t been able to stop thinking about wanting to kiss you?
Kelly’s stomach dropped to her knees. She knew Hank was a flirt, but what if he tried to kiss her? She hadn’t kissed anyone in eleven years and he was a damn Lothario! What if she sucked?
The sound of the shower turning on upstairs distracted her from her panic attack for a half a second before it all rushed back over her. She needed to start off slow. Find someone comfortable to practice on so when Hank laid one on her she wasn’t completely hopeless.
Chris belting the lyrics to “More Than a Feeling” traveled through the flooring and Kelly got an idea. With Chris and her having this weird vibe between them, things had been tense. But, if they kissed and proved there was nothing more than friendship between them, it would kill two birds with one stone.
Now, she just had to figure out how to get Chris to kiss her.
Chapter 14
Chris pushed the cart through Walmart with Kelly by his side, putting his foot up on the back of it and gliding forward across the white linoleum squares. The fluorescent lights above them were like spotlights.
“Nice, very mature,” she said.
“What? You said to treat this trip like we’re back in high school.”
“I just wanted you to go to the store with me, not act like a nerd bomber riding carts up and down the aisle.”
Chris stopped in front of the cat food and turned to her with a wicked smile. “Wanna climb into the basket and give them a real show?”
“Are you crazy? I’m not climbing in there and letting you push me around. That’s how I broke my arm junior year.”
“Hey, it wasn’t my fault! Ray was driving.”
Their banter faded at the mention of Ray’s name, and Chris wished that it didn’t still hurt. Especially the last few weeks, when he’d had such conflicting emotions where Kelly was concerned, the thought of Ray on top of that had made his guilt palpable.
It had never been awkward to talk about Ray before, but the silence was strained now.
Because Ray was always the buffer between me and her, and then it was her grief and work.
Now there was nothing to blind him to the fact that he wanted Kelly.
So freaking bad.
Kelly cleared her throat and grabbed a couple of cans of cat food off the shelf. “Here’s some wet food, which you can wean him off if you hate the smell.” She set the food in the cat and walked across the aisle to the other ceiling high metal shelves. “I’ll grab a bag of kitten food too.”
“I can get it,” he said.
“Please, it’s like 8 pounds. I can handle it”
He intercepted her, grabbing the yellow bag with a triumphant whoop, trying to regain the carefree interactions they’d had before he brought up Ray.
She rolled her eyes. “Congratulations, you got the food.”
Chris set the bag into the basket. “Damn right I did. Now, I’ll race you to the litter!”
He grabbed the cart and pushed off. He heard her laugh behind him and grinned. They could do this. Things didn’t need to get weird.
She caught up with him, going neck and neck with the cart as they neared the rear wall where the cat litter was stacked on wire shelves.
Kelly got to the shelf first. She grabbed a plastic jug and held it over her head. “I am the master of the litter!”
Kelly did a little victory dance with the jug and Chris was struck dumb by how adorable she looked in her plaid pajama bottoms, gray sweater, and messy ponytail, doing the running man.
She stopped shaking her rear and frowned at him. “What? Do I have something on my face?”
He couldn’t very well tell her he was caught up in her cuteness. “Nothing. I just miss this.”
It wasn’t a lie. He did miss this. Missed her.
Kelly set the jug of litter in the cart. Then, she held onto the side, a thoughtful expression on her face. “I have too. I am sorry things have been off between us lately.” She turned her back to him, taking a litter pan off the shelf and kept talking. “Maybe it’s because we’re in our thirties and both single. I know we never made a pact or anything, but it’s logical to start noticing your best friend, who also happens to be a good-looking guy, when your biological clock starts ticking.”
“I don’t know whether to focus on the fact you never thought I was attractive until now or that you’re blaming it on your body telling you it’s time to make babies.”
She shot him an exasperated look. “Not what I said. I was just thinking that ever since I decided to date, there has been this tension between us. Haven’t you noticed?”
Yes, because I keep thinking about you naked.
“Nope, just the same as always.”
“Ugh, you are such a liar.” She pulled a cat food dish and water dispenser off the shelf, tossing them in the cart.
“Why do you say that?” he asked.
Kelly kept heading down the aisle with him pushing the cart alongside her. “Um, maybe because you freaked out over a boner.”
“Okay, that’s not really something we need to discuss here,” he said.
True there was no one on the aisle, but still…packages were never meant to be discussed in public.
“Fine, but you have to admit, the vibe between us has been freaky.”
Chris turned the cart up another aisle, heading toward the front of the store. “I’ve had a lot going on at work and so have you. We’re just in a funk.”
Chris could see the lines of registers at the end of the aisle were several customers deep. Why was it anytime of day, Walmart was always busy? “Hank thinks we need to strip down and stand in front of each other naked.”
Chris almost hit a display of air fresheners, he stumbled so hard. “What?”
Kelly seemed oblivious to his initial shock. “He thinks we’re harboring a secret lust for each other and the only way to know for sure is to display or goods and see if one of us pounces.”
Chris didn’t like that he was intrigued by Hank’s suggestion, especially when he knew the guy just wanted to get into Kelly’s pants. “And why are we discussing our friendship with a stranger?”
“It came up when we went for drinks last week. He asked if we’d ever dated and I said no, we were just friends, and he said that was bullshit. That women and men can’t be friends because someone always wants the other. Then he told me the only way to prove that there are no lustful feelings was to get naked.”
“Hank really said lustful feelings?”
“I’m paraphrasing, but yes.”
They went to an open register in the self-checkout area, and Chris handed her items while she scanned them. “So, are you telling me that you peeked in on me while I was in your shower today and you found me wanting?”
“Of course not! I wouldn’t spy on you!”
“Now I’m worried there may be a peephole in the bathroom somewhere.”
She whacked him in the arm with the jug of litter. “Shut up! Someone is going to hear you and think I’m a pervert!”
“Relax. Pretty sure the woman who is supposed to be manning this area is asleep.”
They both glanced over at the Walmart employee, who appeared to be nodding off where she stood. “Hurry and pay for your stuff so we can get out of here. I’m going to die of mortification.”
He slowed down, loving the bright blush on her cheeks.
“You bastard.”
“Let’s see…” He pulled his wallet from his back pocket and removed his debit card. Staring at the screen as though befuddled, he tapped the card on his bottom lip. “Now, how do I pay?”
“I am going to kill you.”
“Why so serious?” he asked, tilting his head to the side as he looked at her.
She threw up her hands and stomped outside, leaving him alone in front of a talking machine. He’d thought they were just playing, but obviously, he’d missed something major.
He finished his transaction and pushed the cart outside, scanning the area for Kelly. He finally spotted her next to his car, pacing.
Chris pushed the cart up alongside the truck, scowling at her. “Hey, what was that? I was only kidding about the peephole.”
“Yeah, I know, it’s one big joke to you,” she said sarcastically.
“What’s one big joke?”
“Can you please open the truck? I’m cold.”
Chris had no idea how, since it was still seventy degrees outside. He unlocked his truck and she climbed inside. He loaded up the groceries, completely bewildered by her anger. How had they gone from laughing and playing around to her sitting silently in the front seat?
Chris climbed into the passenger seat and just sat there, watching her as she stared out the passenger window.
“All right, are you going to explain to me what in the hell I did to make you lose your shit?”
“Nothing,” she mumbled.
“You just stomped out of Walmart like they were out of a blue light special. So, I’ll ask again…why did you run out like that?”
She turned away from the window and met his gaze head on in the dome light.
“Fine. I don’t think what’s going on with us is a joke.”
“What’s going on with us?”
Kelly’s hands fluttered between them. “The sexual tension. It’s obviously something that isn’t going away, and I think we should test the theory.”
Chris was confused by the sudden shift from sullen to excited. “What theory?”
“The friendship theory.”
His jaw flopped open. “You want to get naked with me?”
“No, of course not. Nothing so extreme.”
“Then what…”
“I think you should kiss me.”
Chapter 15
Kelly hadn’t meant to just blurt it out like that, but there was no calling the words back now. She’d gone there. She’d asked Chris to kiss her, and he appeared petrified by the suggestion.
How freaking humiliating.
She hadn’t liked him making fun of her or teasing her about spying on him when he was naked. Even though she’d been a little tempted to check him out…she would never actually walk in on him. She knew he was joking, but it had hit too close to home for her comfort.
Still, that was no excuse to throw that at him like that. She’d been trying to feel him out, but that had escalated quickly.
The fact that he had said nothing for nearly thirty seconds worried her that she may have given him a mini-stroke. Ouch.
“Is it really so horrifying?”
“Maybe not horrifying, but you asking me, your best friend of eighteen years, to kiss you out of the blue? Little bit surprising.”
She gripped her hands in her lap nervously. “Wow. I was just thinking that the two of us have been on edge with each other, and maybe we just need to…satisfy our curiosity.”
He went quiet again and Kelly was frankly relieved that he hadn’t denied their chemistry. Otherwise, she’d have probably jumped out of the car and walked home.
“What are you curious about? Whether I kiss like a thirsty camel? I assure you, I don’t.”
“Why would I want to kiss you if you did?” He didn’t seem to have an answer for her and she snapped, “Are you really that scared to kiss me?”
“I’m not scared! I just don’t want to make it weird.”
She couldn’t believe they were sitting in the Walmart parking lot, arguing about whether they should kiss. “Oh, you mean like avoiding me and acting as though I’m this hideous creature you’ve never thought about kissing?”
“Of course, I’ve thought about kissing you, Kel. I’m a guy and you’re a beautiful woman. But then I tell myself what a bad idea it would be.”
She wanted to press him on why exactly it would be bad, but was afraid of the answer. That even though he was attracted to her and loved her like a friend, she wasn’t what he was looking for.
And that bothered her more than she could say.
“Look, Chris…I have not been out with anyone except a sue-happy man with an anger management problem. And there is a very experienced guy who hasn’t been shy about wanting to take me out, and I’m afraid I’ll embarrass myself if he kisses me.”
Chris’s expression clouded over. “Are you talking about Hank?”
“Yes, I am talking about Hank!”
“I thought you weren’t going to do anything with him because he is a client?”
“Well, I changed my mind! He’s attractive and charming and I deserve to have a little fun!”
“Then what in the hell do you want to kiss me for?”
“What if I’m a bad kisser? It’s been so long, I might have forgotten.”
Chris groaned. “You’re not going to be a bad kisser, Kel.”
“How do you know? I am out of practice and what if I forget to swallow my spit and I drool all over him?”
“So, you want to use me to practice on and drool all over me?” There was no real bite to his words and hope bloomed in her chest. Was he warming to the idea?
Kelly placed her hand on his bicep. “You’re my friend. I know at least if I’m bad, you’ll tell me the truth.”
For a moment, she thought he was going to lean across the seat and do it. His body stiffened, and he shifted ever so slightly towards her, his gaze narrowing.
Instead, he turned away from her and started the truck. Her hand fell away from his arm, the rejection like a slap across the face. When he backed out of the parking space, Kelly sank against her door, tears pricking her gaze. She’d been an idiot to ask. It wasn’t fair to Chris and it was a stupid idea anyway.
The drive back to her place was silent, until Chris flipped on the radio. Alternative rock filled the empty space, and Kelly discreetly wiped at her eyes.
“Are you crying?”
“No,” she said, her voice thick with emotion.
“Ah, hell.”
Chris jerked the truck onto the side of Bucks Bar Road, right above the drop down to the Cosumnes River below. When the truck stopped on the dirt, he shoved it into park.
“What are you doing?” she cried.
Chris shifted in his seat until he was turned to face her, his expression a mix of annoyance and concern. “I’m not going to sit here and listen to you cry for t
wenty minutes.”
His tone sent fissions of fury across her skin and she reached for the door handle. “Then I’ll walk.”
Chris grabbed her arm gently but firmly, and didn’t let go when she tried to pull away.
“You’re being a real jerk, you know that?”
“I’m trying to apologize, if you’ll just let me,” he said.
“Not interested.”
His face snapped into a scowl. “Well, too bad, because you’re not walking on this road at night, so you’re stuck with me.”
She crossed her arms mutinously across her chest and waited.
“You threw me for a loop, is all. Not because I never wanted to kiss you and see what it would be like. I have, several times over the years. But not like this. Not to be used as practice for another guy you really want to kiss.”
I don’t know if I’d say I really want to kiss him.
Chris’s hand cupped her chin, and the dome light came on. She blinked her eyes as they adjusted to the light and then met Chris’s intense gaze.
“Kissing you now would be cheap and meaningless. If or when we kiss, I want it to be me you’re thinking about.”
Kelly’s heart was hammering so fast she couldn’t keep count of the beats, and her breathing became shallow and rapid. That sounded romantic. Had he meant it that way?
And why did his honest, heartfelt admission make her want to close the distance between them?
His hand, which had been so warm against the skin of her jaw, fell away and he smiled. “I’m sorry if I came off as a jerk.”
She swallowed hard, her mouth dryer than her childhood sandbox.
“It’s okay. I get it.”
“Do you?”
No, she didn’t. She thought Chris had refused to kiss her because she didn’t really want to kiss him.
Except, she was pretty sure she did want to kiss him, because she was freaking disappointed that he was denying her again.
But instead of pushing the issue, she nodded. “Of course. Let’s get back to the kitten.”