Perfect Match

by Monica Miller

  “Oh, c’mon, love, you know Dick will come around. Rick,” I corrected when she raised an eyebrow. “I’m irresistible, he’ll realize that soon enough.”

  “Yeah, you so are,” Emma said with a sarcastic tone as she ruffled my hair.

  “Hey, you still can’t do that!” I complained and she laughed. “So… How…”

  “Is Monica? She’s a mess. And now I feel awful,” she said as she started playing with her bracelet and I smiled to myself remembering that was a present from me for the last Christmas. “I don’t know what to do, because we can’t tell her, but I have to tell Alex cause he works here and it’s more likely to notice us being… like this,” she said and I laughed. “And Rick is so worried for her and everything it’s just… messed up. And what’s even more messed up is that… I really don’t care at some point. Because…” she sighed and I kissed her forehead.

  “I know. I love you, too,” I said and she gave me a small smile. “Hey, it’s okay to feel that way. I think. But I’m an insensitive bastard so…”

  “Yes, you are,” Emma agreed laughing and I kissed her. “Okay, maybe not that insensitive,” she said and I smiled back at her.

  *

  “The meeting sucked,” I told Emma when it was finally over. I’ve been in there with crazy boring people and I couldn’t think of no one else but Emma. “And… What sucks is that I have to go to New York. For three freakin’ days!” I said as I leaned onto her desk and sighed. “Can you get me a coffee, please?”

  “Sure. Three days it’s not that much, stop overreacting, baby. And since you’re in New York you could… visit Ben.”

  Obviously I could show up at my best friend’s door after I almost married his longtime girlfriend, and practically didn’t give a shit about what he wanted. Yeah, I could do that.

  I sighed and waited for Emma to return with the coffee as I noticed the rest of the people in the department. I’ve been working here for over three years and still I had no idea what their names were because I didn’t care. And I slept with most of the girls out there. I guess I was a jerk indeed. I know I was one because of what I did to Emma, but before that…

  “What are you thinking about, Nicholls?” Emma asked as she placed her hand on my shoulder.

  “That I’m a jerk.”

  “Oh, I’m so glad we finally agree,” she said laughing and then noticed my serious expression. “What happened?”

  “Nothing happened, just… I had two boring hours to think about stuff in that meeting. And I’m such a jerk. I knew I was a jerk with you, but before you I was…”

  “Are you really thinking about that?” she said as she grabbed my hand and led me into my office. “It doesn’t matter anymore. You’re not like that now, Matt.”

  “How do you know?” I asked her and she looked at me surprised. “How do you know I won’t do the same thing I’ve done a few months ago with Monica? Seriously, how can you even trust me?”

  She opened her mouth to say something, but she changed her mind and shrugged. I sat on a chair in front of my office and she sat next to me and placed her hand on top of mine and I sighed. I knew I was completely wrong for her, before I even started the thing with Monica, but how was I able to act like I deserve her now? Cause I don’t and she knows it.

  “I don’t know how I can trust you, but Matt… You’re not like that. Not anymore. I know it.”

  “No, you don’t!” I snapped. “I don’t even know myself, how do you think you know me?”

  “Why are you being so hard on yourself? And why are you doing this now?” she sighed and I avoided to look at her.

  “Maybe it’s stupid to think we could be together.”

  “No, it’s not!” Emma said and I could feel the desperation in her voice. “You can’t rely on what you did in the past and think you’ll do the same. You can’t live in the past, Matthew, and it doesn’t define you. I would’ve expected that you learned something, though.”

  “I did. That I don’t deserve you. And if I didn’t deserve you back then, how could I deserve you now? It’s stupid. I don’t want to hurt you anymore.”

  “Then don’t!” she said and grabbed my hand. “I love you. I do trust you with all my heart, Matthew.”

  I nodded and hugged her so tight I could feel the beating of her heart.

  “What am I gonna do without you for three days? Hey, wanna come?”

  “No, I’m gonna… Stay here, and try to be around Monica and so on. But thanks. And it doesn’t feel like a good idea to retrace our steps,” she said and I smiled. “And you should spend time with Ben.”

  “If only it was that simple… I really think he hates me,” I confessed and Emma raised an eyebrow. “You should hate me too, you know. And I wouldn’t blame you. I think it would be easier that way. Because now you make me hate myself for being such a-“

  “Would you just stop? I’m sick of your complaining. I know I should hate you, everyone told me that, even I know that too well, but I don’t. And we’re here now…” she said as she sat on my lap and ran her hand through my hair. “But maybe we should stop the PDA until I talk to Alex. And you should talk to Monica, you know.”

  “You haven’t talked to Alex yet?” I asked completely surprised.

  “When was I supposed to? In between spending time with you and… that’s it?” she sighed. “I’ll talk to him, but I just don’t know how. And… You talk to Monica. Before you leave,” Emma warned me and I smiled and kissed her again.

  “What about the PDA?” Emma asked before kissing me again, more passionately this time and I placed my hands on her back and then she slowly pulled away and said she has to come back to her office. I nodded and took her hand in mine and she smiled at me like I was the center of her universe and I felt my heart pounding in my chest.

  “Matt, Emma it’s not… Oh.”

  Emma and I dropped our hands in a second after we heard the door open, but we remained there frozen, Emma still too close to me and I looked at Monica who was standing at the door with a completely surprised expression on her face. I noticed she looked tired and not as fresh as always, she was just… normal. Slowly Emma took a step away from me and ran a hand through her hair and gave me a quick look and she seemed as confused as I was. What were we supposed to say or do now?

  “We need to talk, Monica,” I started and Emma sighed as she stood there a foot away from me avoiding looking Monica in the eyes.

  “Monica, I thought I saw you!” Alex said appearing out of nowhere. Basically I could feel Emma’s desperation and I wasn’t expecting this either. She looked at me like I could magically make this all go away, but I couldn’t. I knew I had to talk to Monica, but I broke up with her drunk at a Christmas party, and now I had no idea what I was supposed to say that won’t hurt her more.

  “Yeah, Matt has something to tell me,” Monica started and she crossed her arms over her chest and looked at Emma. “Emma, want to say something?”

  “Um-no,” she muttered and I realized I loved this about her, that even though Monica and I had a relationship during the time we started dating, she never showed Monica any resentment, she just kept being as nice as always.

  “Okay, I’m listening, Matthew,” Monica said and she slowly walked towards the chairs in front of my desk and it seemed that she gained her confidence back in a matter of seconds and she flipped her hair over her shoulder and glared at me. I noticed Emma wanted to leave and obviously she felt uncomfortable, but I wanted her here. “Emma, why don’t you stay?” It seems that Monica wanted her there too.

  “Why?” Alex asked and I glared at him for a second then smirked to myself.

  Not that I was keeping count, but I really was better than him. Better looking, smarter, funnier and I had Emma now, and he hasn’t been enough to make her forget about me, and, well, that made me feel pretty good about myself. I could almost sense my confidence increased visibly.

  “I’m sorry, I love Emma,” I blurted
out in the most honest way I knew. It wasn’t the best way, but how could I say this? “And I always did, even when she didn’t even notice it. I think I loved her from the very first moment I saw in the gym of my high school so busy helping everyone, and just so… beautiful… And I don’t know it was just stupid. I’m sorry, Monica. I was in a bad place when Ben left and Emma and I had… issues back then so… I don’t know, it was stupid. You are great, Monica, but…” I paused and sighed. “But I don’t care about you as much as… Rick does,” I continued and then looked at Emma, who at first was surprised, but she slightly nodded and a small smile curved on her lips.

  “Rick? What?” she asked raising an eyebrow. “No! I mean… You never took the time in nine months to mention that?” Monica asked and she glared at Emma who was speechless. Alex seemed bothered, though.

  “I… I thought it was for the best. But I always make terrible decisions, so…”

  “Oh, thank you,” Monica said sarcastically and she ran her hand through her hair. “Okay, I get it. I think I always knew it, you two were… way too involved to be just friends and there was a time when I wanted you to realize it, but… Seriously, you could’ve said at first there was nothing serious. I didn’t want anything serious after Ben either. I mean, he left me! And then you were there and it was simple for me. But… I don’t know, why am I the Evil Bitch in this story? Because I don’t read minds or that I tried to convince myself you really didn’t feel anything for Emma, because I should have known?”

  “No one said you’re the evil here, you’re not,” Emma said and I was as surprised as Monica to hear her speak. “I never blamed you, Mon… It’s just… sometimes it felt wrong, cause you were my friend and you always said Matt and I should be together, but we weren’t, and then after Ben left you started dating Matt. At the time we were… something.”

  “So I was right!” Alex said and I could sense the annoyance in his voice.

  “God, could you be more annoying?” Emma asked and sighed. “Yes, you were right. Happy now? I’m sorry, Monica… Really.”

  Monica slightly nodded and without any other word, Emma stormed out of my office. Monica stood there for another minute and left too, and I was alone with Mr. Arrogant who looked like a serial killer ready to kill me.

  “I know, I’m better,” I said with a smirk and somehow it felt right to be just myself and actually show him that I was better than him. Because, oh, I was.

  *

  New York wasn’t as great as I remembered. It was cold in winter – I remembered that, but the last time I was here I had Emma. It was almost a year ago and so much has changed. I have lost my best friend who was like my brother to me because I was stupid, I almost lost the one who seems most likely to be the love of my life, and man I’ve became so cheesy. That’s why because I was standing in a foreign city, in an unknown building, in front of a maroon door with the number 35 on it, too afraid to knock it.

  Because behind that door was my best friend. Ben.

  I remembered how much Emma insisted on going to talk to Ben, and I haven’t told him that I was in New York, but since I knew where he lived, Emma made me go and visit him because “these kind of talks don’t work through the phone, Matthew,” she said so many times. In fact, everything with Ems was going so good lately. Of course, Monica hated me and I haven’t seen her since that day in my office and now she was avoiding Emma too, and Emma almost hated her for it, because she hasn’t said anything when I was dating Monica, but now Monica was being immature. Alex didn’t talk to us anymore unless he had to, but it was cool. I don’t think Emma told Rick about us yet, but I knew for a fact he still hated me.

  So I took a deep breath and arranged my black hat on my head before convincing myself to knock on the door. After holding my hand in the air for a few moments, I finally did it. I knocked on the door three times, like I usually do.

  After waiting about a minute and feeling completely uncomfortable, the door opened and there was Ben in a suit as always, with his hair all done and his black stripped tie loose, with a glass of whisky in his hand. His eyes widened when he saw me there and the only thing I managed to do was say “Hi” with a big grin on my face.

  “Matthew!” was all that Ben said.

  “What’s up?” I asked with a bigger grin if that was possible.

  “What are you… doing here? Came to personally ask me to your big, awesome wedding?” he asked as he stepped aside and let me in.

  His apartment was huge and decorated exactly how I would’ve pictured Ben’s place. Nothing like our old apartment, everything here was modern and the walls were white and the place had big windows from the ceiling to the floor in that very modern stylish New York apartments’ way. His apartment was clean and it seemed Ben had the latest technology and everything. I slowly made my way towards the couch while admiring the big paintings in his living room, which by the way, was bigger than my little suit at that hotel, and then I sat on the couch and looked at Ben. He was still standing with that glass of whisky in his hand and he looked bothered by me dropping by uninvited.

  “You have an awesome place here, man,” I said appreciatively.

  “Thanks,” he replied and he seemed uncomfortable. “So, you’re here ‘cause?”

  “Cause I miss you, man!” I said and then realized just how corny that sounded. Emma is making me soft! “I miss your stupid remarks and your lazy, grudging ass and you getting all upset cause I beat you at every game possible on Xbox.”

  “So you’re not here to invite me to the wedding?”

  “Whose wedding? If I’m gonna mention it to Emma she’ll stuck it into my-“

  “Wait, back up,” Ben said and sat next to me with a confused look. “Emma? What about Monica?” he asked and then got up again and went to pour me a glass of whisky.

  “Oh, that’s history, man,” I replied laughing and he gave me a small smile. “You were right, and I’m so sorry I know I should’ve have messed with her, because bros don’t do that, bros stick up for each other and they never mess with an ex or that kinda stuff and I’m sorry, dude, cause I was… wrong and stupid. I made a mistake when you left and that almost cost me everything… And then I had no idea how to get out of it, until I got drunk again and told Monica the truth. I really think I work better when I’m drunk, you know, cause I hooked up with her while being drunk and dumped her still drunk. A hell of a relationship, huh?”

  Ben looked at me in surprise for a few minutes then handed me the glass of whisky and nodded and started laughing.

  “It’s okay, bro,” he said with a smile and he placed his hand on my shoulder. “We’re bros, we don’t fight over a bitch, right?”

  “Monica’s not a bitch,” I said and clenched my teeth. I mean, I didn’t love her or anything, but I respected her and cared about her.

  “Isn’t she?” Ben asked and raised an eyebrow. “They all are, bro, listen to me, they all… are.”

  “You’ve changed,” I noticed and he nodded.

  “What gave me up?” he asked with a bitter laugh. “Look… You have no idea how glad I am that you’re here. And I miss Monica sometimes, because she was… I was used to her, and sometimes I think I just should’ve stayed there, cause here’s a hell lot of a work, and disrespectful, annoyingly devoted people, and I don’t or can’t have actual friends and… I missed you, bro!” he said and pulled me into a bear hug. Okay, Emma wasn’t turning me into a soft, cheesy guy. There was an invasion of cheesiness!

  “We really have to go and get drunk,” I said and Ben laughed and agreed.

  “And come back and beat you at every Xbox game I own!” he stated.

  “As if,” I mocked him and he punched me in the shoulder. “Fine, you have a nice place, I’ll let you win once, but that’s it.”

  “Blah blah blah. You won’t let me win, cause I’ll beat your sorry ass until you fly back to Los Angeles, pal… How long are you staying? I hope you’re staying here, cause, dude… You’re my
bro and I haven’t seen you in almost a year… Why didn’t you bring Rick? Let’s call Dick.”

  “I’m staying at the Empire, my company is paying for it… I’m staying for the weekend… I guess? And Rick hates me more than you do so…”

  “At the Empire? Nice! But move here for the weekend. We still have the whole weekend. Got plans for tomorrow night? Why does Rick hate you? Let’s call him!”

  “Fuck you, that douche bag hates me cause I dated Monica. And now he’ll hate me cause I’m dating Emma.”

  “We’re calling Dick, man,” Ben said as he pulled out his phone and ran away from me before I had the chance to react. “Hey, bro! Look, I was having this awesome idea that you should move your ass to New York tomorrow. No, I don’t care, you’re staying here and… No, listen, you have to! You must come otherwise I’ll go and drag you here, and believe me, Dick, you won’t like it. So… Pick you up tomorrow? Let’s say… at 5 and a half AM?” Ben joked and I rolled my eyes as I pulled out my hat and stretched my legs on his glass coffee table. “Dude, just don’t do that, it’s my 1,000 dollars coffee table!” Ben complained. “No, you just come. Finally! See you tomorrow. Done, Nicholls. This weekend… We’re rocking New York!” Ben announced with an awkward voice.

  “Stop being gay, Ben. Let’s go and get drunk first.”

  “We have to pick up Ricky tomorrow morning,” he said as he arranged his jacket and placed his wallet in his back pocket. I nodded and followed him out towards the parking lot, where Ben led me to a black Porsche. “So? Whatcha think, bro?”

  “Awesome!” I said as I opened the passenger door and he started the engine.

  This is going to be a long night. No. A long weekend.

  *

  “Dude, you’re fucking drunk?” Rick asked as he dropped his backpack on the floor in the airport and crossed his arms over his chest. “What is he doing here?” he asked and looked at me and said the pronoun like it disgusted him.

  “Funny story…” Ben stared before bursting into laughter once more and obviously I found that hilarious and started laughing as hell, placing my hand on Ben’s shoulder for support. “I found him… at my door… and… party!” Ben yelled and a few people around us turned and glared at him, but he didn’t care. “What’s up, Dick!” he said and went to Rick to hug him and caused me to try for a moment to keep my balance.