Mail Order Man

by Heather Gray

  Minnie couldn’t resist adding, “She still feels the need to lecture the young ladies on decorum now and then, though, and when she decides you need a lecture, there’s no escaping her!”

  Sarah put her hand on Minnie’s arm and stepped back into the conversation. Looking at Samuel, she said, “Now, though, when she lectures you, she does it with kindness. A lot of us young women who grew up out west don’t understand the way citified folks do things. In these last months, the elder Mrs. Johnson has taught me something important.”

  Minnie gawked at Sarah as if she’d sprouted wings and was about to fly away. Demurely sitting with her back ramrod straight, Sarah adjusted her skirt. She let the anticipation build a bit, knowing both Minnie and Mrs. Smith wanted to hear what she had to say, though Mrs. Smith was too much of a lady to show it outright.

  “It is far easier,” Sarah spoke with the false authority of a child pretending to be a teacher, “to get others to see things your way when you speak to them with kindness.”

  Mrs. Smith hid a smile behind her hand while Minnie laughed outright. The expression on Samuel’s face gave nothing away.

  Mrs. Smith gathered everyone’s plates to put back in their basket. The foursome decided to sit back and relax a bit. Some of the locals, as well as the church choir, were taking turns singing hymns to entertain the crowd before the competitions began.

  ****

  “I have decided to go to college,” Minnie said suddenly.

  As Sarah’s gaze swung toward her friend, she took in Mrs. Smith’s shocked expression and could tell this was the first Minnie’s mother had heard of this as well. She couldn’t read Samuel’s blank expression but could tell that his eyes appeared to be focused on the crowd.

  “Mum, I know it’s the right thing. Sarah is right. People listen to kindness. In all these months, I didn’t even figure that out. There is so much for me to learn, but I don’t feel like I can learn it here. Making better choices is important, but I can admit that’s not my only problem. I need to learn how to be an adult. Going somewhere…” Minnie waved her hands in the air, at a loss for words on how to finish her thought.

  Sarah reached out and took her friend’s hands in her own. “Are you sure?” Minnie nodded, and Sarah squeezed her hands encouragingly. “I think I understand. Do you know what you want to study?”

  College had been a dream of Sarah’s for much of her childhood. Her father had spoken of it with such awe. He had always wanted to go, but his parents could not afford to send him. From the time Sarah was born, he and Sarah’s mother had started putting money away so she could go to college if she wanted to. Together, she and her father often talked of college and what it would be like. It wasn’t common for women to go, but it was becoming more acceptable.

  When Sarah had arrived at the age where she could have gone, she’d prayed long and hard about it. Feeling pulled in two directions but unable to explain why, Sarah ultimately had decided not to go away to further her education. Heartbroken by her own decision, she’d remained in Larkspur.

  A couple of months later, Sarah’s father died unexpectedly. She was so grateful she had stayed home with him. She never again thought of leaving for college, and she never regretted not going. Though a wonderful, kind, loving person, Minnie did indeed need some direction in her life. Excitement coursed through Sarah as she thought about the adventure awaiting her dear friend.

  Minnie shook her head. “I’m not cut out to be a teacher, that’s for sure. There are a lot of options I still need to explore.” Her face simultaneously radiated uncertainty and peace.

  Sarah understood. She knew what it was like to be at peace with God but still uncertain about your circumstances.

  “If Dad says it’s okay, though, then I want to start with the next term.” Minnie watched her mother and told her in a voice strengthened by confidence but lacking the obstinacy that normally rang through her tone, “This is the right thing for me.”

  Mrs. Smith nodded to her daughter, tears misting her eyes. “You are growing up before my eyes. We will speak to your father at the first opportunity. You are my last child at home. The other girls have all married fine men and moved away. It will be difficult to see you go, too. I will endeavor not to worry about you, but it will be hard. My love for you has never been conditional, and it never will be. If this is what you truly want, then I will support you, but I want you to understand we are not pushing you out of our nest.”

  “I know, Mum,” Minnie answered the unspoken question. “I’m certain.”

  Sarah sat quietly watching mother and daughter. The longing for a loving relationship like the one they shared washed through her. At times like these, she missed her parents even more than normal. She often wondered why God took them home when He did. Whenever those doubts assailed her, she chose to believe God knew what was best and to trust that one day she would be in His presence where it would all become clear to her.

  Sarah thought she understood why Minnie chose to bring it up here, in public. At home, emotions would have taken over, and Minnie might not have been able to express how certain she was. It would have ended up sounding like she wanted to run away from her mistakes. Sarah couldn’t exactly relate to that, but she had enough experience to know people sometimes listen so closely to our words that they fail to hear what we are saying with our heart. Here, in this setting, Minnie was able to keep her emotions from tangling up her words so that she could express her heart more clearly. After a couple minutes of silence, Samuel moved himself around a bit to lean up against the base of the tree. This put the three ladies between him and the rest of the people gathered on the church lawn. “So Sarah,” he said, “I’m mighty curious about this morning’s message. Not a single person has given me a straight answer about it.”

  The blush did not delicately creep up into Sarah’s cheeks. Of course not. This blush shot up Sarah’s neck and face faster than a deer fleeing a hungry mountain lion.

  “Perhaps you should ask Reverend Green about it,” she offered as she moved her eyes about everywhere except in Samuel’s direction.

  “You know, I think that’s a mighty fine idea,” Samuel said with a grin. “In fact, I did that very thing. Want to know what he told me?”

  Not sure she actually wanted to know, Sarah asked anyway, “What did the good reverend say?”

  “He told me to ask you about the sermon.”

  ****

  As Samuel said the words, he watched the three ladies. Mrs. Smith picked up her fan and hid her face, but her eyes told the story of laughter barely held at bay. Minnie spit out the drink of lemonade she’d taken before she could swallow it. Sarah, meanwhile, went from blushing a nice healthy pink to turning a pasty white, her hand clutching at her throat as though her fingers could dig out the right words for her to say.

  Buoyed by the laughter he saw in Mrs. Smith’s eyes, Samuel continued, “So, are you going to tell me about it, or do I have to go around asking everyone else that was in the congregation this morning?”

  “You really don’t want to go around asking people about the sermon. Besides, you’re supposed to stay here with us.” Sarah’s voice held triumph as she said the last part.

  Not able to resist needling her, he said, “I could always invite people over to our blanket so I can ask them.”

  “It was a message about propriety.” Sarah blurted, still not making eye contact.

  “That’s a broad term. Was he talking about propriety in business or in church?”

  Samuel knew he was pushing and that it could backfire. In addition to Reverend Green’s valid argument, though, Samuel simply delighted in seeing the way Sarah squirmed. He had dealt with a lot of different people in his life, not all of which had been savory. It warmed his heart to be reminded there were people left in the world who were good and honest and sheltered from the darker nature of man.

  Sarah, looking as prim as she could under the circumstances, answered, “Propriety in relationships.” Sarah then clarified,
“Between men and women. Propriety in relationships between men and women.” It seemed to Samuel that Sarah might actually be choking on the words.

  “Ah,” he said with a smile. “Now we’re getting somewhere. So what sage advice did Reverend Green have for the gentlemen in his congregation today?”

  Sporting a perpetual blush now, Sarah answered, “I didn’t particularly hear that part of the message.”

  “Miss Sarah Jenkins, are you telling me you were not paying attention to this morning’s message? You weren’t daydreaming in church, were you?”

  “Of course not!” Sarah’s incredulous response drew the looks of people from a couple of other blankets nearby. Quieting her voice, she continued, “I was reading some verses Reverend Green had pointed out when speaking about a woman’s role. I was so caught up in the message he had for the women that I failed to hear the message he had for the men.”

  “Then tell me about the message he had for the women. I am mighty interested in that.”

  Samuel was determined to push through this conversation until Sarah would look up at him and make eye contact. Whether it was shyness or embarrassment, she needed to overcome it enough to look at him when she spoke about these things if they were going to have a future together. At least that’s how Samuel saw it. He chose not to acknowledge that Sarah may not have realized yet he was planning a future for them.

  ****

  Sarah was certain Samuel was tormenting her on purpose. Getting him to drop the subject altogether seemed to be out of the question. The verses from this morning’s sermon swam around in her mind. There had been verses about chastity, modesty, and behaving honorably. Other verses had been in there, too, verses about submitting to your husband. Samuel was not her husband, so those verses did not apply to her. There had been other passages, though, about recognizing and respecting authority.

  Because her father was no longer living, Sarah’s situation was more complicated. She was staying with the Smiths right now, and she felt God had put her under Mayor Smith’s authority while she was residing in his home. The mayor cared for her and had her best interests at heart, though, so she did not mind. In turn, though, the mayor had placed her under Samuel’s authority for the day. Discomfort assailed her at that thought, but she couldn’t pinpoint exactly why.

  ****

  Now knowing the silence from Sarah did not mean she was upset but rather that she was thinking some things through, Samuel did not mind the quiet. He respected the fact that she didn’t generally respond rashly to people or situations. When she did finally answer, he knew it would be an honest, well-thought-out answer. Samuel was not disappointed.

  Sarah finally raised her eyes from her lap, gave Samuel a piercing look, and asked him, “Why do you wish to know about the reverend’s council for women?” Her tone was kind but serious.

  Samuel knew this was not a time for jesting. “I know what the Bible says on the subject, but I want to hear what you got out of the sermon because I would like to understand you better.”

  “Why?” Sarah responded earnestly.

  Samuel cast his eyes around, as though looking for help in formulating an answer. Finally he shifted back to the woman before him.

  “Sarah, I want to answer your question, but I don’t know how. I gave my word to the mayor. He asked me to keep some things to myself until the situation in this town has settled down. Being a man of honor is important to me, and part of that includes being a man of my word. The answer to your question kind of falls under the umbrella of those things he asked me to keep to myself. That’s not a satisfying answer, I know, but it’s the only one I can give you right now.”

  It was clear that Sarah agreed about how unsatisfactory his answer was. Nonetheless, she forged ahead with answering Samuel’s question. Samuel was so proud of her. Sarah had pluck, that was for sure and certain.

  “Reverend Green covered a lot of topics. Primarily, a woman is to be chaste in her behavior and dress. She should not dress, speak, or act in a way that will lead a man to have impure thoughts about her. Women are to submit to their husbands, but in the absence of a husband, they are to submit themselves to the authority God has placed in their lives, whether it is parents, guardians, employers, or church leaders. Of equal import, women must guard their thoughts, because when a woman has thoughts about a man which are not appropriate, it will show on her face and in her body language, and it will give the man ideas.”

  Samuel let out a low whistle. “That’s a lot to cover in one morning. And that was only the women’s part of things? I’ll bet a lot of men were itching to get out of there by the time Reverend Green was done with them.”

  Surprise on her face, she asked, “What makes you say that?”

  “In my experience,” Samuel spoke, “when a man of the cloth shoots it straight like that, the men get the worst of it.”

  “I find that hard to believe. He was hard on the women.”

  “Is Reverend Green a fair man?”

  When Sarah nodded, Samuel continued, “Trust me when I say then, that whatever he dished out to the women, he dished out equally as much, if not more, to the men. That would be the fair thing for him to do, right?”

  “I’ve never known the reverend to be unfair,” Sarah conceded.

  “So,” Samuel continued, “what did you personally get out of the reverend’s message? You’ve told me what it was about but not what you got out of it.”

  The look on Sarah’s face told him plenty. It shouted out her conflicting emotions. Samuel’s training in interrogation served him well as he watched the woman whose answer he awaited. Wanting to give her a break, he returned his eyes to the church grounds and began scanning the crowd again, avoiding a direct gaze at Sarah. As soon as he turned his eyes away from her, he was rewarded with her answer. “I mostly got confusion out of the sermon.”

  Samuel glanced back at Sarah momentarily, surprised by her answer. As soon as he returned his attention to the crowd again, she continued, “I’ve always thought it was okay to converse with the people around you, be they male or female. In my line of work, I talk to all kinds of people, most of whom are men. Since this morning’s sermon, I find I am replaying many situations in my head and asking myself if I behaved in a way or said something that could be considered unchaste.”

  “Such as?” questioned Samuel.

  “You and I went to lunch together, alone, unchaperoned, yesterday. Was that okay, or in so doing, was I putting sinful ideas into your head about me?”

  Mrs. Smith looked ready to jump into the conversation at Sarah’s question, but Samuel’s words came first, “No. You did not put sinful ideas into my head. The thing about ideas is that you can’t put something in someone else’s mind that’s not already at least a little bit there. If a man has impure thoughts about a woman, it is likely because he has behaved impurely with a woman in the past. Knowledge and thoughts of that behavior are in his mind because he has first-hand experience with it. From that point on, things can happen which remind the man of his past behavior. A woman who is completely chaste and upright may say or do something innocent to its core, but for whatever reason, it brings up memories in the man’s mind of his previous immoral acts. It leads him to have sinful thoughts about the woman before him, the woman who is chaste and upright and who did nothing at all wrong. In that situation, it is not the woman’s fault the man is having these thoughts. The fault lies with the man.”

  Seeing he had the attention of all three women and that Mrs. Smith was not skewering him with her eyes, Samuel continued. “There are other situations in which a man has impure thoughts about a woman, sure, but I think that’s the type of situation you’re asking about. A woman’s responsibility is to behave in a way which honors God. At the end of this day, you are not going to answer to me, or even to the mayor, for your behavior today. You are going to answer to God. If you can stand before Him unashamed, then you have nothing to fear.”

  Minnie spoke up with a question of her own, “If
a woman does not know what sorts of things make a man have impure thoughts, then how can she guard against such behavior?”

  “That’s a good question, Minnie.” Samuel mulled the question over for a moment and then spoke directly to Minnie, hoping Sarah was listening. “Have you ever heard of art forgery?”

  “Of course.”

  “How do you think forgeries are discovered?”

  Minnie shook her head and said, “I don’t know.”

  “Some people,” began Samuel, “think the best way to find forgeries is to study how forgeries are made. The truth is, though, the experts know the only way to detect a forgery is to have examined the real thing. If you know the original work of art well, you are much more likely to be able to spot a fake.” Minnie nodded in understanding. Samuel could see, though she wasn’t responding outwardly, he still had Sarah’s attention as well.

  “It’s the same with us. We need to study the original correct way of living so we can live righteously. Spending all of our time studying what we should not do will only serve to distract us from the path God has for us. Sometimes people think being a believer is all about a lot of dos and don’ts, but it’s not. If we, as Christians, spend our time learning the dos of our faith, then we will naturally avoid the don’ts.”

  Sarah remarked, “What you are saying makes sense, but how do we do that?”

  “I’m glad you asked,” Samuel said with a smile. “I was raised by a good, upstanding man, and he taught me right living by example. My mama, though, she taught me to study God’s word and to make my faith a real thing in my life. One of her favorite verses was Philippians 4:8. It says, ‘Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.’ See, Paul is telling us there to think about the good things, the things that are true, honest, pure and that hold virtue.