Santa Fe Woman

by Gilbert, Morris

  “Why, you look beautiful, Callie.”

  “Thank you, Paul. Jori helped me pick the dress out, and she actually bought it for me.”

  “Well, you two did a good job.” He stood looking at her in admiration and then said, “Some of this food’s good. Do you want to sample it?”

  “Yes. I am hungry.”

  He took her to one of the stalls and kept stealing glances at her. She was pleased, and her lips stirred, her smile a small lightness around her mouth. Paul Molitor was shocked at how feminine she was.

  “It’s going to be a little bit hard for me to think of you like this.”

  “What do you mean, Paul?”

  “I mean like a woman.”

  “Why will it be hard?”

  “Because you never dressed like one or acted like one—but you should.”

  “I never had a chance before.”

  The light from the lanterns ran over the curves of her shoulders, and it was kind to her, showing the womanliness of her figure. She was smiling at him now, and her face was a mirror as her feelings changed. A small dimple appeared at the left of her mouth, and her eyes suddenly danced. “I think I like dressing up like a woman. Maybe I can get a job in a saloon.”

  “Callie, don’t be foolish!”

  She laughed with delight. “I was just teasing. Of course I won’t do that.”

  The two stood in the middle of the swirling crowd, and she said, “I’ll have to find something to do here.”

  “Why, you could do what we talked about.” She waited for him to speak, and he said hurriedly, “You could learn to be my nurse. I’ll always need a good nurse.”

  “That would be—” She could not put it into words, and she turned suddenly. “Let’s walk a bit.” They walked, and she was like a child, delighted by the colors and the dance. He tried to get her to join the festivities, but she said, “I don’t know how to dance.”

  “Well, I’m a good teacher. Before the next one I’ll give you some lessons.”

  * * *

  CALLIE WAS LAUGHING AS they approached the wagons. “I’ll have to find a place to stay. We can’t live in the wagons.”

  “No. Maybe I can get a place with an office and rooms over it.”

  “Why, I couldn’t stay with you there. We’re not married.”

  Paul hesitated then said, “We’ll find you something.”

  The two stood silently, and there was something awkward in Callie. She was like a young colt in a way, awkward but full of the promise of true beauty.

  Suddenly Paul reached out and took her hand. “I don’t know much about women, Callie. I had one once, but she left me.”

  “Where is she now?”

  “Dead,” he said.

  She caught the sound of something in his voice. “You didn’t ever want another woman?”

  “No, that is—” He hesitated then looked down at her. “Not until now.”

  She did not answer but stood looking up at him. “All my life I’ve been lonely,” she said simply.

  “So have I, Callie. Maybe we could help each other.” He reached out, embraced her, and kissed her lightly on the lips, but it turned into another sort of kiss. At that moment the shock of the softness of her lips came to him, and suddenly he was aware of the wild sweetness that was there. He was aware of his own needs, and something passed between them then—something that took the loneliness, the incompleteness, and the emptiness out of him. When he lifted his lips, he could not speak for a moment. “You’re so sweet, Callie, but I’m too old for you.”

  Callie reached up and put her hand on his cheek. “No,” she whispered, “you’re just right.”

  Suddenly a great joy came to Paul Molitor and he laughed. “You can be my bride. I can marry you and raise you right so you won’t have any bad habits.”

  “And you’d teach me how to bring your boots and wait on you hand and foot.”

  “Exactly.”

  “I think I’d have something to say about that.”

  There was a lightness then that came to both of them. Each knew that they had passed some point and could never go back to being what they were before.

  “Stay here in Santa Fe, Callie. A woman needs to be courted. I’ll come courting, and we’ll find out if we can make it through a lifetime.”

  Callie Fortier knew then that this man loved her, and she knew that she had loved him for longer. She put her hand on his chest and whispered, “All right, Paul, I’ll stay.”

  * * *

  “WELL, BLAST IT, CHAD Rocklin, you’re so contrary you’d float upstream if I threw you in the river!”

  Leland Hayden was staring at Rocklin with displeasure. He had just paid him and had immediately begun to talk about future plans for establishing a trading business. But Rocklin had brought him up short, saying, “I don’t think I’d be interested, Leland.”

  Leland had known that his daughter loved this man, and now the question in his mind was why Rocklin would not want to pursue her. She was lovely enough for any man, he knew that, but he saw something in Rocklin he could not identify.

  “Look, Mark has a good idea. We take all our men back, get mules from the Indians, take them and sell them in Missouri. Then we can bring a train back. Why, we could make a good thing out of it.”

  “I think you and Mark can do that without me.”

  “No, we can’t. We need you, Chad.”

  “I’ve been thinkin’ about goin’ trapping. Maybe prospecting.”

  There was something different in Rocklin, and Leland wanted to blurt out, What’s the matter with you, man? You’ve got it all right in front of you. My daughter loves you, and you’ll never find a better woman. He knew this would not do, so instead he set out to convince Rocklin to join forces, to go into business with him. But Rocklin would not agree, and finally Leland watched the big man walk off. “What’s wrong with him? I wonder if he’s got a wife stashed away some place.”

  * * *

  CARLEEN CAME TO FIND Rocklin who was still camping out at the wagons. “What are you doing out here, young ’un?” he asked fondly. He felt a great wave of affection for this young girl and smiled as she said, “I came looking for you. Papa says you’re going to leave.”

  “I’ve been thinking about it.”

  “No, you can’t leave.” She came up and took his hand and pulled at him. “I don’t want you to leave, Chad.”

  “Well, I don’t want to leave so much, but I’ve got other things to do.”

  Carleen stared at him for a minute. “You’d be too old for me by the time I’m old enough to marry, but you can marry Jori.”

  “You are the nosiest young woman I ever saw! Jori is a fine lady, and I’m a mule skinner and a mountain man. She would never marry me.”

  “Yes, she would,” Carleen nodded emphatically. “She’s in love with you.”

  “Don’t be foolish!”

  “She is. It says so right here.” She opened a small book that she had brought with her and read a line out. “‘I love Chad so much, but he doesn’t care for me. That’s obvious.’ She wrote that yesterday. See the date?”

  “Carleen, this is Jori’s journal!”

  “I know it. I read it all the time, but she doesn’t know it. I brought it to show to you because you need to know she loves you. Now, read that.”

  Against his better judgment Rocklin took the book. He felt a sharp twinge of guilt, but his curiosity overcame his scruples. He began to read and for several minutes stood stock-still. Then he closed the book and looked down at Carleen, who was watching him expectantly. “I guess I see what you mean, Carleen.”

  * * *

  JORI HEARD ROCKLIN’S STEPS. Their family had rented a house on the edge of town, and she thought it was Mark or her father returning. The knock on the door startled her, and she muttered, “Who can that be?” When she opened the door, she found Rocklin standing there. He took his hat off and said, “Hello, Jori, can I come in?”

  “Why—of course. Come on in.”
>
  As soon as he was inside, Jori turned to him. Her lips were drawn together into a firm line. She said very stiffly, “I understand you’re leaving for prospecting or something.”

  “Well, that was on my mind.”

  “I suppose you came to say good-bye.”

  “Well, that was my intention, but I’ve been thinking. It’s a dangerous thing for a man to walk away from a situation.”

  Jori stared at him. “What do you mean?”

  “I can look back at two times in my life when I had a chance to do something and instead of doing them I just walked away.”

  “Were they women that you walked away from?”

  “One of them was. I was only nineteen. What did I know?”

  Jori wanted to ask about the woman, but she was upset and asked merely, “What was the other time?”

  “I was at a revival meeting when I was sixteen. God spoke to my heart that day, and I should have been saved. Instead I got up and ran out. I ran from God for a long time. That was a big mistake. I walked away from the best thing in life.”

  “I’m sorry to hear it.”

  He took a deep breath and said, “Jori, I can’t walk away because it would ruin your life.”

  “Ruin my life! What are you talking about?”

  “You love me so much, Jori, that you’d never get over it if I left. You’d wind up an old maid and be miserable.”

  “Why, you insufferable—” Jori stuttered and could not think of a thing to say that would put him in his place. “I think I could survive the loss if you left. What makes you think such a thing?”

  “It says so right here.”

  She had not seen the object Rocklin had been carrying in his hand. When he held it up, she gasped, “That’s my journal!”

  “Yes, I’ve been reading how much you love me here. It says right here, ‘I love Chad so much I don’t even know how to put it into words, but he’s the only man I’ve ever loved or ever will.’”

  “You give me that!” Jori grabbed the journal, her face flaming. “I know where you got this. Carleen stole it and gave it to you!”

  “Yes, she did.” He moved forward, saying, “I’m sorry. It’s a bad thing to read a private writing like that, but it made me see something.”

  “What did it make you see?”

  “That you care for me. I didn’t think you could, not like I love you, Jori.” He reached forward and saw the fire and the spirit in the soft depth of her. There was a sweetness in her and a gentleness and a goodness. She was rich in a way a woman should be rich, and he said quietly, “I don’t know when I first fell in love with you, but I know I do.” He pulled her into his arms and kissed her. Her mouth was firm when he touched it, but the firmness dissolved and he felt the goodness of her. Old hungers suddenly rose in him. It was like falling into a softness, and he held her, unwilling to turn her loose. He felt her lips returning his caress, and, as he kissed her, it was as if she was saying what she had written in her journal. The feeling of a deep need satisfied ran through him.

  “I don’t keep a journal, Jori, not on paper, but if I did, I’d write in it, ‘There’s only one woman in the world for me. She’s beautiful and true as steel. If I don’t have her, I’ll be miserable for the rest of my life. But if she’ll marry me, I’ll have the world right here in my arms.’”

  “Oh, Chad, do you mean it?” Jori dropped the journal and put her arms around his neck. He kissed her again, and then suddenly a voice broke in.

  “You see, Chad, I told you she was in love with you.”

  “You—you varmint!” Jori screeched. She pulled away from Rocklin and made a wild grab at Carleen, but Rocklin beat her to it. He snatched the young girl up and put his face against hers.

  “Why, I can’t let you do it, Jori. She’s a favorite of mine, you see.”

  Jori watched as Carleen smiled and put her hand on Rocklin’s cheek. “You need to shave, Chad. Your whiskers hurt.” She turned and said, “I want you to make him shave every day after he marries you, Jori.”

  And then Jori laughed—a full, free laughter that came from somewhere deep in her heart. She came over and put her arms around the two of them, and then she said, “Well, it’ll take both of us to raise him, Carleen, but we can do it together.”

  The End