Good Lord: Woolf Tales 2

by Viva Gold

  CHAPTER 19

  British summer time was in full swing and the grounds and gardens of Greenall Manor looked spectacular. I grabbed some water and snacks from the kitchen and enticed Angel outside into the sunshine. It was really hot and I worried Angel would burn so I commandeered one of the gardener’s golf buggies and drove him around the estate. His face was a picture as we lurched up and down the lawns; in and out of woody areas finally alighting onto a pathway that was a lot smoother. I noticed Angel studying the simplistic controls of the vehicle and realised he desperately wanted to have a go. I stopped the buggy and got out.

  “Go on you have a turn.” I gestured for him to slide across the seat and take the wheel. The boy blushed bright red and shook his head hiding his face under his long fringe. “Go on, it’s dead easy to drive.” Angel peeked out from between his bangs. I pointed to the driver’s seat. Angel chomped on his lower lip; took a deep breath then sidled over to take the wheel. I hopped into the passenger seat and instructed him on how to use the basic controls which was basically stop; go; brake. I omitted to mention the reverse function just yet.

  Angel took to driving like one of the estate’s many ducks to water. His confidence grew until we were soon enough re-tracing the trail we’d taken leading back to the house.

  “I love it!” He exclaimed jumping out and running around the buggy. “Can I go again?”

  Just then Remi appeared by the patio doors of the conservatory. He was dressed in tight jeans and a marl grey V-necked t-shirt that hugged his chest leaving little to the imagination. I could see the definition of his pecs with his hard nubs pushing at the soft cotton. The sight of him made my cock swell. He was devastatingly handsome and I longed to run my fingers through his black hair. It was pushed back off his face. He hadn’t shaved either giving him an overall bad boy look. Which let’s face it he basically was.

  “Remi – come see!” Angel called to our lover and Remi responded with a huge grin. It only served to make him more attractive. I palmed my bulge and adjusted myself. Remi trotted over to Angel who let forth in rapid fire French how he’d learned how to drive. I laughed at his enthusiastic description of our antics.

  “After the party when things quieten down around here, maybe we’ll progress to a proper car.” Angel’s eyes nearly popped out of his head. “We have a run around Smart car in one of the garages. That’s a good car to start in.” I could see it did little to placate Remi’s obvious anxiety at my suggestion. “Once Angel is driving it will afford him some independence.” I added to reinforce my offer.

  “Not helping.” Remi growled. I raised an eyebrow at him; crossed my arms and tapped one foot to the gravel. “But I suppose you’re right, he should be able to get around on his own.” My jaw nearly hit the ground in shock. Angel clapped his hands in excitement while Remi merely shrugged in defeat. “I concede to practicality.”

  We linked arms and took a walk over to the sprawling marquee that was being decorated for the party at the weekend. Charlie was running around like a headless chicken driving the party planner mad with questions and suggestions. Honestly, I don’t know why she bothered with one in the first place because she was a total control freak.

  “You take after your mother.” Izzy’s deep voice in my ear made me jump. Remi turned and frowned but restrained from commenting. “A born organiser and total nurturer.” Ah, it was meant as a compliment. My tummy fluttered at the praise.

  “Thank you. I think.” I gifted Izzy with one of my well-rehearsed condescending grins. Remi noticed and nudged me. I stood up a little straighter. “Umm, where’s Adam?” My tone was a tad higher than normal and three sets of eyes narrowed in my direction.

  “He’s having a nap. Exhausted from all the activity.” Izzy winked at me and I squirmed.

  “I won’t ask.” Remi mumbled under his breath but I heard the note of ‘we’ll be talking about this later’ in his voice.

  I rolled my eyes. “Have you heard from the Twins?”

  “Actually, G just called. They’re staying in Paris until Saturday but will be here for the party.”

  I was intrigued to hear what the Twins had been up to and looked forward to seeing them. I knew Angel was desperate for news of his friends.

  The next few days passed in a haze of lust filled sexual marathons; plenty of sleep; gym sessions and random picnics around the grounds when we were often joined by Adam and Izzy and my parents. We all bonded very well and relaxed and had fun. Before we knew it the night of the gala dinner had arrived.

  “I don’t see why I have to wear this. Why am I even going?” Angel whined. He pulled at the slim fitting tuxedo jacket. “And the pants are too small.”

  “Angel, darling. Firstly, the pants fit perfectly. Secondly, you look stunning. Thirdly, you have to go because you are now part of this family and it is therefore your duty.” I batted his hands away from his trousers. “Don’t tug on the fabric, you’ll crease it.”

  I had arranged for Izzy’s personal tailor, Myer, to visit the manor earlier in the week to measure me, Remi and Angel for matching navy tuxedos. After much complaining about lack of time etc etc, Izzy managed to negotiate for us and our suits arrived this morning. We all wore them with open necked white shirts and in my opinion looked very swish.

  “Fine. But how come Remi’s pants hang looser?” Angel pointed at Remi’s suit trousers. Remi smirked at me and I rolled my eyes.

  “Because he has a monster cock that needs to be accommodated sweets. Ok?” I fiddled with my cufflink preferring not to make eye contact with either of them. Remi barked out a laugh and gave Angel a one-armed hug. “Hey don’t mess him up!”

  Once we were ready I engineered our big entrance. We held hands and descended the main staircase to the lobby where the rest of the family awaited our arrival. I spotted Izzy and Adam in their black dinner suits looking magnificent. My Dad wore his trusty old white jacket but Mummy stole the show by miles. She wore an elegant green silk off the shoulder gown that flattered her stunning figure. It was long hence the matching stiletto heeled pumps. The outfit was beautifully accessorised with her diamond jewellery and I was reminded of when I was younger and used to sit at the top of the stairs watching as my parents would leave for one of their lavish nights out.

  “Mummy, you look amazing.” I air kissed the space by her right then left cheek.

  “As do the three of you. Goodness, you are all so handsome. What with Izzy and Adam too, I won’t be able to keep my eyes off you all night.” She winked at Angel and he blushed beautifully. “Anyway, I do hope you all enjoy tonight. Ben and I like to throw a summer party every year for all our friends. We try and raise a little bit of money for charity at the same time and this year we decided to give it to the Woolf-Cohen foundation to help your project for LGBTQ+ kids.”

  A collective gasp filled the hall. Adam’s hands flew to his chest and Izzy swallowed hard several times before he was able to thank my parents profusely. I was so proud of my parents and immensely grateful for their love and support. Despite my telling Mum that Jack Woolf was perfectly capable of fund raising, I knew that the money raised from tonight would be extremely welcome.

  The Twins arrived looking devastatingly attractive in their identical bespoke black suits. We caught up briefly to be told things were going well but agreed to leave the heavier talks for the following day. We chatted happily on our way over to the marquee.

  The evening was great fun. I caught up with many old friends introducing Remi and Angel as my boyfriends. Over the years I had acquainted my parents’ crowd with my many eccentricities so that hardly anyone batted an eyelid. The one foolish chap who might have uttered a few too many sarcastic slurs about our relationship was politely asked to leave. By G & T. We never saw him again that evening.

  Dinner was a formal seated affair followed by dancing and some serious drinking. We were already slightly tanked on reception champagne and wines with dinner, but Mummy insisted we check out the cocktail bar complete with an expert m
ixologist. The man was tall, dark and sexy with the greenest eyes making him too difficult to resist. Angel and I hung on his every word as he gave detailed descriptions of the varied cocktails he made us sample. Remi hung back chatting with Izzy. The pair of them had their arms across their chests as they switched between keeping an eye on the two of us getting more and more drunk, and watching Adam on the dancefloor with G & T.

  “Wanna dance Jase. C’mon.” Angel grabbed my hand and pulled us towards the dance floor. I was barely able to remain upright let alone twist and groove but somehow with the Twins keeping me balanced I regained a little dignity and was able to strut my stuff. We grew hot enough to discard our jackets flinging them in Remi’s direction.

  Izzy looked mad. “That’s fucking thousands of pounds worth of suit you’re carelessly tossing aside.”

  “Tossing pffft!” I was so pissed. “Izzy said tossing.”

  Angel giggled and cocked his head. In his cute little English accent, he asked, “What is this tossing?”

  The Twins groaned and both tried to grab me at the same time but with alcohol infused ninja sharp moves I dodged them before proceeding to pretend to wank. My miming skills were a little rusty but with added sound affects I thought Angel would get it. Adam was in hysterics until Izzy approached and whispered something in his ear to which he sobered up and stopped laughing pretty damn quick. His bottom lip disappeared between his teeth and I was suddenly desperately curious to know what Izzy had told him.

  “Jason, Jason…” Angel was tugging my arm. “I still don’t understand ‘tossing’.” The boy was gyrating to the music and I was mesmerised by the rotation of his narrow hips. He clearly wasn’t wearing any underwear. “Tossing? Q’est que ce?” Angel was insistent for sure.

  In my head I knew it was a bad idea but in the moment it seemed like the obvious thing to do. I undid my suit pants; pulled out my fat cock and masturbated in the middle of the dance floor while I explained the joke to Angel in French.

  “What in the fucking hell do you think you’re doing?” Remi’s roar actually made my fringe move such was his exhalation of breath. He was crowding me so I tried to move backward to explain but the Twins were in the way.

  “Look chaps…” Angel was crying with laughter so much he had to be held upright by Adam. “Angel wanted…” for the life of me I couldn’t remember what I needed to say. “I…umm…” Remi growled. He yanked my trousers up and tucked my cock back in.

  “Nothing to see here folks – Jason’s had a little too much to drink is all.” Izzy reassured the confused guests.

  “I’m snot drunk.” I pointed my finger at Izzy. He raised an eyebrow at me. “Oooh the famous Woolf look of mirth which rhymes with Smurf. Papa Smurf. Isadore Woolf Papa Smurf. Why aint chooo blue?”

  Remi groaned. “Oh God. He is so drunk.”

  I looked over my shoulder but it was all dark. “Who you chattin’ to Cuz?”

  Remi frowned. “G & T? Who do you think?”

  I twisted around again almost losing my balance. It was pitch black. “You mad?” I looked over at Remi who was pointing upwards. I raised my head to find two pairs of ebony eyes staring down at me. It was all dark because the black fabric of their jackets was at my eye level. “Oops.” I giggled. “So black.” I giggled again. “Your suits, not you. Well you too but mostly nearly not quite as dark as your suits. ‘Cept your cocks. They’re even blacker. Sort of purply.”

  “Remi!” Izzy barked at Remi who was gaping at me like I had two heads.

  “I do have two heads. Big Jase and Little Jase.” I was very serious about this. G or maybe T; could hardly tell them apart especially while under the influence was about to speak. “Wait!” Everyone paused. Remi looked a little nervous although heaven knows why we were having a lovely time. “That’s how I can tell them apart.”

  “Your heads?” Remi asked.

  “Pffft not me silly.” I threw my head back and laughed. G & T shifted on the spot. I noticed Adam had picked Angel up and settled him on his hip like a child. “Aah baby.” I waved at Angel and he waved back before burying his head in the crook of Adam’s neck in a fit of giggles. “So cute.”

  “Heads, Jason. Pay attention.” Remi clicked his fingers in front of my face. I followed his hands with my eyes.

  “I like doze fingers in my arse mostly.” I licked my lips and squinted at my cousin. “Why’s your mouth twitchin’?”

  “Umm, no reason baby.” Remi schooled his features. “I totally was not going to laugh at you I promise. But I’m still waiting to hear about the heads you mentioned.”

  I was getting very warm so I unbuttoned my shirt. “S’warm.” I twiddled the barbells in my nipples and sighed. “Hawt!”

  “Um Remi…” Izzy didn’t sound happy. Not at all.

  “Ooh Papa Smurf’s getting grumpy.” My voice was very sing song for some reason.

  “Because someone is letting their ‘boy’ make a spectacle of themselves.”

  “Uh oh!” I stood to attention although everyone else seemed to be listing to the left. “Don’t call me ‘boy’ Papa Smurf. You know Remi, my ‘Dom not Dom’ doesn’t like it.”

  Angel squealed.

  “I can’t understand you when you speak French Jase, you know that.” Izzy barked at me.

  Remi stepped up. “Thank you for your input Isadore. When I need your help I’ll ask, ok. Right now, we are all still dying to hear Jason’s ‘head’ theory.”

  “Oh yeah,” I cried, “not my heads. You know, Big Jase, Little Jase.” Remi nodded. He looked serious. “I’m a talkin’ bout black heads.” I waved a finger in G & T’s direction. “Twin blackheads.”

  T; could be G groaned loudly. “Oh fuck, here we go.”

  I was on a roll. “Now don’t fink I’m being rashisht; racshit’ raci…bias, but in case you haven’t noticed the Twins is not white skinned like us. They is black.” Remi nodded. “So means their heads is black.”

  Remi nodded again. “I think I get it Jason. But how does that relate to telling them apart?”

  G; could be T chuckled. “Mate, you are so gonna regret asking that. Apologies in advance.”

  “Not their head heads.” I pointed at their faces. “But their cock heads.” I pointed at their groins. “Also black you see.” I looked at Remi. He appeared to be trembling. Maybe he didn’t really understand. “D’you wanna see?” I groped at the Twins trousers but they both hopped backwards out of reach. “So anyway so. Heads, yeah? Cock heads. One of them’s got a little pink patch over the slit. So whens we are all naked, I know T cos he’s got a little pinkie.”

  T shrugged. “Sorry man, I did warn you.”

  Remi stared at me then he threw his head back and guffawed. Literally like a donkey. We all watched him for at least two minutes. It may have sobered me up slightly. When he stopped it was sudden and we all jumped a little at the silence. He loomed large over me. “You are a very funny drunk.” Remi scooped me up off the floor and threw me over his shoulder like a fireman. “But also, very rude. Say goodnight to your friends.”

  “Argh Remi put me down you big brute.” I banged my fists on his arse cheeks to which he responded with a sharp smack to mine. “Aieeee” I shrieked. He wasn’t going to put me down. “Bye everyone. You may never shee me again cos Cuz is going punis me. Punis, ha ha - sounds like penis.”

  “Wait!” Izzy stopped Remi in his tracks. He came around Remi’s back to where I was still spouting nonsense. Izzy held my head and kissed me lots. “Night gorgeous man. Love you Jase.”

  “Night Papa Smurf. Love you too but not in a ‘wish he would fuck my brains out’ kind of way anymore, ‘cos Remi does that now.”

  “I know he does Jase.” Izzy kissed me again before patting Remi on the other shoulder in a weird bro code gesture.

  “Adammmmmmm.” I sang his name. “Why you upshide down?”

  Adam lowered Angel to the floor. “See you in the morning baby.” He kissed Angel who promptly blushed bright red.

  “Remz d
id you shee that. Angel got a kiss off Adz. I want one.” I kicked my legs until Remi held them still.

  “For fuck’s sake kiss him already.” Remi cried at Adam.

  The big man rubbed my back and kissed my head. “Goodnight my little smurfette.”

  Izzy roared. Adam wasn’t that funny.

  “Twinnies. Not mine anymore, nope. Still love them though. That alright Remz.” I held my arms out to G & T.

  “Of course, baby. Say goodnight; they’ll still be here tomorrow.”

  The Twins petted over me for a bit and my penis got a bit hard. “Sorry Cuz cos they is still really sexy and they smell unbelievable.” I inhaled deeply. My two former lovers boomed out a deep laugh.

  “Goodnight you three and good luck.” They walked off to join Adam and Izzy who were entwined on the dancefloor. The Twins embraced and I watched them slow dance until everything went blurry.

  “Think I’m going to be sick if you keep me upshide down.” The world tilted on its axis making my stomach roll but I managed to keep from vomiting as Remi set me on my feet. Angel tucked into my side and I threw an arm around his neck to give me balance. “We’re like the three Musketeers!”

  “Je suis D’Artegnan!” declared Angel swooshing at the air with his make-believe sword.

  “Well strictly speaking he wasn’t a Musketeer.” Remi was taking this far too seriously as usual.

  “Shut up Porthos!” I cried. “I have to be Aramis. Now point your swords in the air, c’mon. All together now….”

  “All for one and one for all!” We cried to the sky above; even Remi.

  “Uh oh.” We got to the edge of the driveway about to enter the house when the contents of my stomach rebelled. I flipped my head to Remi with wide eyes full of alarm and he didn’t hesitate to step towards me.

  “Non!” cried Angel trying to stop him just as I projectile vomited all down his front. It was like a scene from the Exorcist as gallons of stewed alcohol spewed from my mouth covering Remi from the neck down.

  I dreamed I was drowning and water was filling my mouth and my nose until I couldn’t breathe.