Mad About Max

by Holly Jacobs

  Max’s temper flared at the thought of Grace’s so-called “family” plotting against her. No wonder she saw fairy godmothers. “Find out what they know,” he told Leo.

  “I plan to. Can I do anything for you?”

  “Can you call the airport and take care of the ticket?” Max asked as he narrowly avoided crawling up a red Neon’s tailpipe.

  “Consider it taken care of. I’ll call now. You just find that girl and bring her home.”

  “I’ll do that. Thanks, Leo.”

  “Don’t tell me thanks. If my wife put Clarence up to this, I’ll take care of it. Maybe if I’d taken care of things before, this wouldn’t have happened.”

  Leo broke off and Max heard a dial tone. “Good luck.” He snapped his cell phone back together against his thigh and put it back in his jacket pocket. Leo sounded like he really might take care of things with Leila. It should prove to be an interesting confrontation. Max was human enough to wish he could be a fly on the wall for that one.

  But right now he had better things to think about. He had to jump on his charger—or plane, as it were—and save his princess from an evil toad.

  Max swerved in front of a semi and shot forward. “I’m coming, Grace. Just hold on. I’m coming,” he murmured, pressing the gas pedal to the floor.

  He couldn’t seem to move fast enough. It seemed like years to get to Vegas, instead of hours. Max got out of the cab in front of a row of hotels in Vegas and paid the driver. He’d never moved as fast as he had this morning, yet the entire day seemed to go in slow motion.

  He’d rushed to the airport, barely managing to pick up his ticket and get to the terminal before take off, then had sat next to a very talkative older woman who practically swooned when he told her he was on his way to Vegas to get married.

  And he was going to marry Grace as soon as he got her back in his arms. If he married her then he’d never have to let her go again. He didn’t even care if she was crazy or sane, rich or poor. She was his.

  As the cab drove away, Max looked at his surroundings. How on earth would he find Grace in Las Vegas? She was just one of a million people wandering beneath the bright lights and neon signs.

  “I will find her,” he vowed with grim determination as he walked up to the Love Nest Inn. It was a small establishment the cabbie had recommended. When Max found Grace, he didn’t want to bring her back to a major casino. He wanted someplace small, quiet and intimate. Someplace special, because when he brought her back, she’d be his bride.

  As he entered the quaint lobby and checked in, Max smiled. Soon Grace would be his forever.

  He told the clerk, who reminded him of his grandmother, that they would stay anywhere from a day to a week, depending on how long it took him to wrap up his business.

  She handed him the key and motioned the bellboy, thankfully not mentioning that his only luggage was a paper bag, which held a special purchase he’d made at the airport gift shop.

  Max hurriedly followed the bellboy to room four thirty-one. When the bellboy left, he carried the paper bag into the room’s pink and gold fixtured bathroom. He knew that the best way to find Grace was to ask the fairies where she was.

  “Myrtle? Fern? Blossom?” he called as he opened the bag and retrieved an eyeliner pencil.

  He set the pencil on the floor in front of him, as he again called, “Myrtle, Fern, Blossom? If you’re here, I need your help. Vegas is a big city, and I don’t have any idea where Clarence took Grace. Can you help me? I brought you an eyeliner pencil. It seemed to work better than the shaving cream.”

  Nothing happened. Max sat down on the cold tile floor. An hour later, the fairy godmothers still hadn’t responded, despite his calling them periodically.

  Heaving a frustrated sigh, Max decided he was either crazy or he’d imagined the whole thing at Grace’s house. He had, after all, been up all night, pacing the floors with worry. Maybe he’d been so tired he’d hallucinated.

  The explanation was sound, but Max knew it was also wrong. The fairies were real. So why hadn’t they come? Were they too busy to answer him?

  That possibility worried him, so he made himself think up an alternative reason for their behavior. Maybe they couldn’t find him. But if that was the case, how had they found him at Grace’s house?

  Only one idea came to mind.

  Maybe the fairies were only able to go where Grace had been.

  He stood and rushed into the bedroom, grabbing the phone and dialing. He didn’t relish making this call, which would sound insane, but he’d do anything to save Grace, even if it meant looking like he was—what had Grace called it? Oh, yes. Sanity impaired.

  “Leo?” he said when the man answered on the other end.

  “Yeah, it’s me. Have you found Grace?”

  “Not yet. How are things going with Doris and Leila?” Max decided to start off small and work his way up to the big question.

  “I was right,” Leo said, his tone furious. “They intended for Grace to marry Clarence. He’d offered them a cut of Grace’s money if they helped him land her. It seems they encouraged him to press his suit when you appeared on the scene last night. But you don’t have to worry about them anymore.” Leo’s voice reduced to a growl.

  “No?”

  “I know I haven’t always laid down the law to my wife in the past. You can ask Grace, or she’s probably already told you. But Leila will not have anything more to do with Clarence. She’s locked herself in her room and is standing by the door screaming at me. You see, I went into her wallet and cut up all her charge cards. It’s a worse fate than death as far as Leila’s concerned.

  “On Monday she’s going to start working for me. That way I can keep an eye on her, and I’m going to make her pay for her own purchases. I’m afraid I’ve done Grace a disservice by not putting my foot down years ago. Leila and Doris have been brutal to her on occasion, but last night wasn’t just brutal . . .”

  “Leo?” Max cut him off.

  “Yeah?”

  “I’m glad you’ve taken care of Leila, but did she tell you where Clarence was taking Grace?”

  “She didn’t know anything more than you did. Clarence was taking her to Vegas for a quickie wedding. He didn’t want to risk you coming between him and all that lovely money.”

  Max sighed. He’d hoped Leila would know exactly where Clarence had planned to take Grace. Since she didn’t, Max had no choice but to let his newfound friend think he was nuts.

  “Leo,” he said, “I have to ask one more favor.”

  “Anything. I feel responsible for this whole mess. It’s not that I think Clarence would hurt Grace. I don’t think he has it in him, but—”

  “This isn’t your fault, Leo, and what I’m going to ask you will sound strange. It may work and it may not, but either way I’m asking you to give me your word that you’ll never tell a living soul about this.”

  “You’ve got it. Now, tell me what you want me to do.”

  He asked Leo to go to Grace’s apartment, telling him to call as soon as he got there so Max could finish giving him his instructions.

  “I feel like James Bond,” Leo said, a hint of his old joviality in his voice.

  Twenty minutes Leo called and said, “Okay, I’m here. Now what?”

  “Go in the bathroom with the cordless phone.” There was a long pause, and Max asked, “Are you there, Leo?”

  “I’m walking into the bathroom right now. What is this mess all over the floor?”

  “It’s a long story, and I promise Grace and I will fill you in later. Right now I want you to yell, ‘Myrtle, tell me exactly where Grace is.’ You got that?”

  “You want me to yell what?” Leo choked out.

  “Myrtle, tell me exactly where Grace is. You can ad-lib. Tell her Vegas is a big city, and Max doesn’t kno
w where to look. Tell her you’re on the phone with me and will tell me what she says. Tell her we need to know now.”

  Leo hesitated, but finally called, “Myrtle, Max needs to know exactly where in Vegas Grace is. He’s in his hotel room—”

  “Tell her I’ve been trying to call her, but no one answered.”

  “Max says he’s been calling you, but no one answered, so he sent me over here to contact you. Where’s Grace?”

  “Is anything happening?” Max asked urgently.

  “No,” Leo said.

  “Well, keep calling,” Max encouraged him.

  “Max, I know you’re a psychiatrist, but don’t you think this is a little . . . well, crazy?”

  “I know it seems that way, Leo, but it really isn’t. Please keep trying.”

  “Myrtle?” Leo called again. “I don’t think whatever’s supposed to happen is going to happen,” Leo said after another fifteen minutes of yelling. His voice sounded hoarse.

  “Just a few more minutes,” Max pleaded.

  “Holy crap!” Leo’s voice exclaimed over the phone.

  “What is it?” Max asked, excited.

  “The eyeliner pencil that was in the middle of all the ooze on the floor . . . Well, you won’t believe this, but it’s writing all by itself!”

  Max could hear the panic in Leo’s voice. “Don’t worry, Leo. I believe you because it’s Grace’s godmothers doing the writing. They won’t hurt you. They’re just trying to tell us how to find Grace.”

  There was a long stretch of silence. “What does it say, Leo?” Max finally asked.

  “Amazing Grace Wedding Chapel.” There was a quiver in Leo’s voice. “Max, are you sure I’m not crazy?”

  “Tell you what. If you are then I helped drive you there, so I’ll treat you—no charge.”

  “Thanks.” Leo’s voice was a little stronger. “You are going to explain this all to me when you two come home, right?”

  “I’ll explain it as best I can,” was Max’s noncommittal response.

  “Ah. I see. You don’t understand it, either.”

  “Not really, but I’ll tell you what I can, and Grace will fill in what she can. But right now, I’m out of here,” Max said, as he frantically flipped through the phone book.

  “Good luck,” Leo called.

  “Thanks, I think I’m going to need it.”

  “HE’S ON HIS WAY, dear,” Fern told a distraught Grace.

  “Yeah, yeah, yeah. That’s what you told me when Clarence hauled me onto the plane,” Grace grumbled. She shifted on the bed. She was in a honeymoon suite, waiting for Clarence to come back, waiting for Max to come rescue her, waiting, just waiting.

  “Max was right behind you,” Blossom protested. “You have no idea how hard we worked to rearrange the schedules of a pretty major airline to get him here on time.”

  “So why isn’t he here?” Grace was tired. She hadn’t been able to sleep, what with being kidnapped and crazy. Even if she could have slept, first the godmothers had kept popping in and out of the plane, and now in and out of the hotel room, driving her even crazier with their happy chatter.

  She took back every thought of missing them. She wanted this over so they’d be gone. “If Max left right around the same time I did, what’s taking him so long?”

  Grace closed her eyes, wishing the tacky honeymoon suite would go away. An actual red, heart-shaped bed was the centerpiece in the gaudy room. Mirrored ceiling and heart-shaped hot tub rounded out the perks. It was tacky and very red.

  Clarence, the deranged snake, still expected her to marry him. He kept threatening to try his friend’s concoction on her. She kept agreeing to be compliant because, according to the fairies, Max was on his way.

  But there was still no Max in sight, and Grace sat in her wedding finery. The white dress the fairies and Glinda had made was to act as a wedding gown. It was topped by a veil that Clarence had produced.

  Where is Max? Grace wondered, starting to panic.

  She knew, even if Clarence didn’t, that she could get out of a marriage she’d been forced into, but she didn’t want the hassle. She didn’t want to spend one more minute in Clarence’s slimy company. She wanted to go home. Even more than that, she wanted Max.

  No, that wasn’t quite right. Want wasn’t a strong enough word to describe the feelings she had been having.

  She needed him. She missed him, for a thousand different reasons. There was the way he listened to her, really listened, as if what she had to say mattered. She missed the way he smiled.

  And the way he touched her. She closed her eyes, shutting out everything but the memory of Max’s touch. Oh, how she missed how he touched her.

  Wanted. Needed. Missed. None of the words were wrong, but none described the fullness of what she was feeling.

  Love. It was the only word that fit.

  She was in love with the man she’d only met two days ago. The thought was staggering and yet so simple. I love Max!

  “Gracey?”

  She realized three fairies were sitting on the bed, studying her. “Were you all reading my mind again?” she asked.

  Love? The feeling was too new to share, even with the fairies. She wanted time to explore the depth of the love she was feeling before she told them.

  “You asked us not to,” Fern reminded her.

  Fern’s statement didn’t really answer her question, but Grace let it ride, too awed by the feeling to be annoyed, even with the fairies.

  “You see, we had another little problem,” Blossom said, interrupting Grace’s profound revelation.

  Grace’s awe was replaced by renewed panic. “A little problem? Where the three of you are concerned, there’s no such thing as a little problem. Do you remember Pauline and Terry? You had her dress up like a man to investigate that gambling ring. When Terry met her and started having feelings for her, he started worrying about his masculinity. Of course she couldn’t tell him she wasn’t a man without blowing her cover. And Pauline had no way of knowing that Terry was investigating the group for the Attorney General’s office, because they weren’t just into illegal gambling, but they were also trafficking drugs.

  “You three had those two running in circles for the whole book.” Grace flopped face down on the tacky bed.

  She wanted to bury her face in her hands, but they were still tied. “I’m doomed!”

  Myrtle reached out and raised Grace’s chin. When Grace looked at her, she said, “I think you’re being highly unfair, Grace. After all, things worked out in the end. Pauline and Terry got married, and they’ve formed their own detective agency.”

  “They call it Finders, Keepers,” Fern said excitedly. The characters had been named Pauline Finder and Terrence Kept. Grace didn’t want to, but she couldn’t help falling once again for her godmothers’ update on characters she’d invented.

  Deciding that, if she was going to be crazy she might as well go all the way, she said, “Oh, that’s nice. Do they have any children?”

  Fern nodded. “Almost. Pauly is pregnant. The two of them are arguing fiercely. Terry wants her to stay home, and she wants to continue working.”

  “He says it’s too dangerous,” Blossom added.

  “And she says if it’s too dangerous for her, because she’s almost a mother, it’s too dangerous for him, the father,” Fern added.

  Myrtle smiled and patted Grace’s cheek. “Don’t worry, dear. They’ll work out their differences, just like you and Max will get over this kidnapping thing. All of you will be stronger for it in the end.”

  Stronger? Grace didn’t care about being stronger, she just wanted Max. “Why isn’t Max here yet?”

  “Well, you see . . . Uh, Fern?” Blossom started, but obviously chickened out. “It’s like this. Um, Myrtle will tell you.”r />
  Myrtle glared at her two fainthearted sisters. “You see, Grace, the three of us are tied to you, and only you. We can go any place you’ve been, but we can’t track Max. He’s not our godchild, you are. So you see we, ah . . . Well, we lost him.”

  “You lost him?” Grace yelled.

  Clarence came rushing into the room. “Is everything okay, Grace?” His gaze fell on her hands, apparently making sure she was still tied.

  “Is everything okay? Okay?” Grace began to laugh hysterically.

  She ran through the list of the things that were not okay. She was crazy; she was kidnapped; she was being haunted by inept fairy godmothers; and a crazy man wanted to marry her for her money.

  But the worst thing in her whole list of complaints was that Max was out there looking for her, and there was nothing she could do about it. Myrtle, Fern and Blossom had lost the man she loved. She was going to be their first failure.

  “Just get out of here Clarence. I don’t want to see you now.”

  A look of understanding crossed the little weasel’s face. “It’s all right, dear, I understand. Pre-wedding jitters. But once my ring is on your finger, and the license is all signed and legal, then you’ll feel a lot better.”

  “Better?” Grace scoffed, wishing she could throw something at the money grubbing rat. “Get out of here Clarence before I do something desperate.”

  Clarence left.

  “Now,” Grace began, returning her attention to the fairies. “You three tell me how it is you lost the man I love.”

  “Now, Grace, we lost him, but he found us,” Fern explained without, of course, explaining anything.