I'll Show You

by Derrick Rose

  But don’t get me wrong, that was just at the end, and it was me who didn’t handle the criticism right. There really was love for so long. I love Chicago and I still love the Bulls. That’s why I ask them if I can work out there when I’m in Chicago. I don’t do that other places. Stopped by to see Jerry Reinsdorf when I was there after that first season in Minnesota. Told him how much I appreciated everything he did for me. I remember after my ACL, Jerry Reinsdorf coming around to see how I was. He cared about the players. If anything, I was more hurt that I would have to leave, be away from my family and my son, PJ, being able to come to the games. Everything gonna have to change. It was an emotional time.

  * * *

  I loved that team I came to with the Bulls as a rookie. Great character guys. Don’t get me wrong, all the teammates I had in Chicago were great players. Just wasn’t a star at that time. Miami had the star with D-Wade. But I was lucky because the Bulls were this really good team with good guys, just had that crazy year before I was drafted—coach fired, assistant coach in, missing the playoffs for the first time in a long time. But great players.

  Like Luol Deng, he’s a laid-back dude. Lu was the first guy who really made me start taking care of my body. He used to do these recovery things. Even after he just had a great game—28 points, outplayed Carmelo Anthony, won the game—but then he’s always doing something to help his body. Either on the bike, lifting, or doing high contrast. I didn’t understand it when I was younger because I would rarely go in the training room. Used to go right past it. I’m on the court, shooting, looking for my spots.

  So to see him do that made me reevaluate what I was doing as a pro. I began to think, “If I’m a pro, I’ve got to do it this way because he’s doing it this way.” Maybe if I followed Lu sooner, things would have been different. I did learn a lot about my body. It was something I learned also from my short time in Cleveland with LeBron, just how much he took care of his body. He was always doing something in the morning: lifting, basketball recovery. He’s on top of everything, totally dedicated. Fifteen years in and he gets in that routine. It took me years to get my routine.

  It takes some different level of dedication to do the recovery things; that’s why Lu can miss a season like he did in L.A. and still come back. After the game, you wanna go out with your friends. I was going to clubs early on with the Bulls. It takes a disciplined person to say, “I’m gonna eat in the crib and put something on TV.” And it’s a Friday. There ain’t too many people doing that. Lu was special.

  That’s part of the reason why I didn’t think it was right to be talking about getting other guys, but I’ll get to that later. Right after the injuries, the second and third with the knee, the two MCLs, that’s when it started changing with my body. It all clicked at once where it was, “I’ve got these great examples in front of me. Lu, Jo, all of them take care of their body. I might as well.”

  I had to learn my body. Learning what to eat, learning how to stretch, learning how to recover. I’ve got a different body. I probably gotta do three or four times as much recovery as everybody else. You throw in injuries and now I gotta overdo it. Even before the surgeries, people were telling me you’ll recover more than other people because your burst is quicker than a lot of people. I didn’t pay no attention until I got injured. I never wanted to look at myself as being different. But in reality, I’m quicker than a lot of people. I had to take care of my body totally different than anyone else. It was a hard lesson to learn.

  Now I sit in the house all the time. You see my NormaTec recovery boots plugged in, buffers everywhere. I got the whole training kit in my house. I try to get in as much recovery as possible all year, throughout the day, so the next day I’m able to go out there and not feel sluggish. When I make it to town, I go eat, get my snacks, sit in bed, turn on the movie, stretch, talk on the phone, FaceTime, but doing recovery the whole time. From when I get in until I go to sleep. In the summer, all day after I work out.

  Look, nobody really wants to do that stuff. It sucks getting up in the morning and you feel like shit. Like right after the season, I take a break, a week or two off to not do anything. But my muscles tighten up right away. So imagine going a month or two months like that? Come back, muscles fatigued. You gotta wake everything back up. I jump a lot of rope, do ladder work. Just try to keep my body kind of fit so I don’t have to get into shape again and again. I can gradually get into shape instead. Staying in shape, kind of. That’s my life now.

  I never saw Ben Gordon lift. Another great teammate. He was quiet, professional, great shooter, good guy. Every person the Bulls drafted, they were professionals, no knuckleheads. Some had some missteps along the way, but you didn’t have to worry about them in the locker room like that. Those are the kinds of guys you want on your team.

  I really didn’t talk to Ben that much, but when we were on the floor, we had an understanding. Like in that seven-game playoff series the first year with Boston, with Ben just making big shot after big shot. That’s another dawg. Somebody who is going to play the way I play.

  You feed off each other. You see somebody go get three buckets in a row and you’re like, “I see you, watch this.” That’s the way it was with me and Ben. Ben was cool, always laid-back, chill, but a dawg. He could score the ball on anyone with ease. You’re getting your easy buckets at the end of the game because of him—they have to watch him. I had 36 that first playoff game in Boston.

  Ben helped make it easy for me. I really wanted him to stay. I didn’t understand it, why he had to leave as a free agent. But to each his own.

  I don’t know if it’s a rumor, but you hear he wished he’d just took the money he was offered from the Bulls instead of leaving. He’d probably still be in the league right now. But he went to Detroit and there was no opportunity. You can have talent, but you need the opportunity. That’s what I was fighting after I got traded to New York. With the Bulls, he could know they were still gonna use him. We needed him at the time.

  * * *

  That first season with Vinny Del Negro was a little bit chaotic. I guess I was part of that with my apple-slicing injury. Someone told me it was the new meaning of slashing guard. Funny, right? But it wasn’t some made-up excuse for something else that happened. I really did just roll over on a knife in bed.

  I know, stupid.

  I’m in the bed, Randall’s upstairs. I used to buy those tough taffy apples at the time. I’m getting ready to cut this apple, and I put the knife on the bed to get the apple in my hand. Then I swing the covers upward looking for the knife, but the knife is right there and it gets me. Freak thing. I didn’t tell Randall. I just left. Randall comes in and there’s a pile of blood all over the bed and he said he was thinking somebody stabbed me. He said he just saw the blood and freaked.

  But I knew no one was going to believe me. That became a lot of my career when it came to my name. Just had to deal with it. I understand some of my stories are bizarre. I get it.

  Anyway, I called the Bulls and the trainer. I got stitched up, 10 stitches, and I practiced that same day. I know people were saying some girlfriend stabbed me or some shit like that, but I was legit just eating an apple in bed. Not smart, I know, but never in my life have I had an altercation with a girl.

  The funny thing is, Randall is the most relaxed and chill dude, so I can only imagine how panicked he was when he saw it. The blood was everywhere in the bed like a horror movie. I just took the car and left.

  That season we were just trying to fit together, with me and all the stuff that happened before and the new coach. But I was grateful to Vinny and the rest of the guys there. He and my teammates allowed me to play through my mistakes. That’s huge when you’re a rookie.

  Vinny was great for me. Ben was scoring for us, Lu also. That was when we had Del Harris as an assistant. He was the first coach to curse me out. One day, he thought I was laughing in a meeting about his zone defense. He went
on some long lecture like he always did about how I don’t know shit and nobody knows shit—heard he told John Paxson that one time—and how he wrote six books on the zone defense and no one knows it like him.

  So he curses me out—but it wasn’t me laughing, it was Tyrus Thomas. Same old stuff. Gonna pick me out because I’m quiet. I think he knew it was Tyrus, but he picked me out because he knew I wouldn’t say anything.

  But I remember that year being cool. We were doing everything to get to the playoffs and we made it, got to that Boston series, my coming out, our coming out.

  We were having a tough start, but it really changed that season when we made the trade to get John Salmons and Brad Miller. We kind of clicked right after that. John opened up the offense. He was another threat, something we needed. Everybody was trying to stop me getting to the rim. We just needed somebody else to make a few shots along with Ben. I thought we really had something there then.

  I don’t like to come off aggressive. Whenever I play with a team, I’m not the guy who’s gonna come out and shoot 25 shots. I like working my way into that spot by getting my teammates’ trust, and if you’re good enough, the ball is gonna find you. In close situations, some guys don’t like taking shots. For me, I just wanted to play a solid game. It was never about taking over right away. It was like, “Alright, I got 82 games this year. I gotta find a way to get through these 82.”

  I always get asked about that second season with Vinny, and especially that two-handed dunk over Goran Dragic in Phoenix. The reason why I jumped that high was because I was scared he was gonna take my legs out from under me, the way he was coming from my left. Tyrus threw me the pass ahead. I wanted to have a chance to get to the rim if Dragic did try to take my legs out, to brace on the rim. When he hit me he actually lifted me up a little higher and I was able to bounce off of him and throw it in and still land. When I was younger, I used to practice dunks a lot. My first time dunking was in seventh grade, so I’d been practicing my dunks for awhile. I knew when he hit me I didn’t have to hold onto the rim.

  I missed just one game that first season and then came those playoffs. That experience was hard, because you had to rest. But being so young, you just want to be out in the city, especially after a game like the first one, with the way we won in Boston. Game 2, I admit, I kind of felt my legs getting a little tired. That’s what they mean by the veteran thing—they know.

  I got the Rookie of the Year by scoring more. But I’m not thinking about my age or thinking I’m too young. I’m thinking I’m in this league with you, so we’re on the same level: NBA players. I don’t care if you’re older than me. That’s the way I looked at it, and I think that’s why I was able to do what I did in that Boston series, set the rookie scoring record or tie it, whatever.

  I’m looking at that paper and I’m averaging 14 to 16 points. I look on the other side and some guy is averaging 26, 28, but we’re in the same place. It’s also why I said that thing about the MVP that season when Thibs came: “Why not me?” I was asked at that press conference when we were starting the season and I remember I said, “Why not?” I had been playing against these guys and doing what I did. I didn’t mean it as a brag, just felt I worked as hard as anyone, I was dedicated to the game and sacrificed a lot at a young age—too much, I realized later.

  I knew I could get even better and I knew these guys I was playing and how I could play against them. Plus, my team was asking me to do a lot, more than I really expected when I came into the NBA. It’s always the way I approached basketball. Don’t back off.

  Just like in life—not “Why?” but “Why not?”

  * * *

  I think a lot about my teammates from Chicago, like Carlos Boozer. Booz was the most energetic person I’ve ever been around. Day in and day out, same person, loud-loud, crazy handshakes throughout the entire day. I remember one time Fred Tedeschi, our trainer, was giving somebody a shot in the butt. Now Booz, after he used to leave the court before the game on his way back to the locker room, he used to sneak in the training room and find Fred and scare him. So this one time Fred is putting a needle in somebody’s butt and Booz is sneaking up behind them, but he don’t see that somebody’s in front of Fred. Booz scares Fred and Fred almost breaks the needle in the guy’s butt. I tell you, Fred was so fucking mad, everybody was mad. Only time I ever saw Fred get mad like that. He turned around because he couldn’t believe Booz had the audacity to do it. Sure was funny.

  Or like when Booz painted his head. We’re in Boston and practicing and he came in the locker room and we made him take the hat off and that’s when we saw it. Ooh, it looked like somebody painted that on. Man painted his head to get hair. And when the light hit it, it really shined.

  That second season with Vinny, I thought we were starting to get something going. I made the All-Star team, but then almost didn’t get to play after the thing with Dwight Howard where he took me out of the air in a game just before the All-Star break. Never said anything to him. I never really have relationships with guys. Other than being on the court, talking on the court. I get off the court and I live a totally different life, not an NBA life.

  I remember that second season, us coming together as a team more and everything just being fun—and realizing that we probably had something here. Maybe it didn’t look like it to y’all, but we had guys. And even though the Cavs beat us in five games in those playoffs, it was like, “Alright, we’re not that far away. Next year we’re gonna be better, closer.” Just getting to the playoffs and being in games—and you’re gonna lose a game, but you know you gave your all and it was just one mistake here or there that cost you the game. I think two games were decided by two points in that series. The playoffs, that’s where either you’re gonna die as a team or you’re gonna grow as a team.

  That was the series where Jo was saying those things about Cleveland and everyone was mad. It was funny stuff though. I was always closest with Jo and it was always funny to hear him talk like that. That’s the New York side of him. I loved that. Like standing up, got your back, got his back. Jo’s like my brother, but that stuff, with, “Who goes on vacation to Cleveland?” I had to giggle a little bit. I loved it because when you’re battling like that, what do you expect? It’s the NBA, grown men, not high school basketball. If you’re looking to hand out trophies to everybody, watch another sport. NBA: No Boys Allowed. It’s not as much like that right now, and I kind of miss that.

  After that series, I kind of felt something different, like it was time for us. I didn’t take much time off, just locked myself in the gym that summer doing two-a-days. Back then, I wasn’t working on my body that much, it was just gym work, just torturing myself. Shooting, running layups, trying to perfect my craft. Hours and hours in the gym, just fucking with the ball. Working on my fundamentals, jab steps, getting ready. I really thought after that it proved we had a team identity. We were coming together as a team even though we lost like that. Realizing we did probably have something going, it was, “Alright, we’re really not that far away. Next year we’re going to be better. We’re getting that identity, growing.”

  You always want to play with another great player. Come on, my whole history I was helping my teammates score. I wasn’t going to be surprised if I was playing with LeBron after that series, not with all the free agency stuff in that summer of 2010. Bron is a once-in-a-generation player. He’s big, he knows how to use his body, he worked on his game, he worked on his shot, and he’s getting more cerebral later on in his career. He’s playing the game like chess now. Where he’s manipulating the game and we take it for granted, kind of, that he’s able to do all these things.

  I’m not a “What if?” person, but if he had come to Chicago, I think we would have won the championship. I don’t know how many, but I think we would have got at least one. The championship box would have been checked off and that was big for me. I would have loved to have played with Bron back then. When I w
as in Cleveland, it was cool playing with him. I actually went there because of him. After what happened in New York, I wanted to be somewhere I had a chance to really win again. I had some chances to go to other teams where I could maybe have played more, made more money, but I wanted to be back in that kind of place. I just hate losing.

  I know my critics were saying I wouldn’t want to play with LeBron, we couldn’t play together, whatever. But I can play with anybody. What about him and D-Wade? They were basically two slashers and drivers, but they got it to work—two championships, Finals every season. You figure out a way. But it didn’t matter. They had it planned anyway in Miami. You’d hear that season the Big Three were going to Miami before all that summer recruitment stuff.

  D-Wade was always tough to play against because he knew how to get fouled. He wasn’t a shooter—LeBron, neither—but it’s hard playing against guys who know how to get fouled. He’s gonna get you to a spot, to an angle where you think he’s gonna drive, and then do something different. He’s gonna step back and hit you with a pump fake to make you jump. Late in the games he was deadly. He used to change the whole game in the fourth quarter because he played that way.

  The Bulls were talking to so many guys that summer, but I was cool with whoever they brought in. What was I supposed to say, “Go get me a shooter, get me D-Wade, Bron”? Nah. I like the way Derek Jeter did it. He didn’t recruit—although I did make a video for the Bulls, but it was never talked about. Jeter said he’d get better, that was his job. There are so many guys in the league who would be great to play with. That’s the way I felt, but I just worked on getting better.

  Playing against someone like Russell Westbrook is different. Because you’re playing against a freak of nature. He has a crazy amount of energy. He’s going to crash every time to get a rebound. And everything is set up around him or everything is set up off the way he plays. It’s hard playing against someone like that. But I for sure love it. The reason I love it is because you’re kind of at a disadvantage because some guys you’re not gonna stop what they do. I know people compared me and Russ because of the way we attacked the basket, but a big thing of pride for me that’s always overlooked, I feel, is my court IQ. Like, I’m out there naturally playing a raw game, like Russ, but I’m also controlling the game—you gotta be paying attention.