Her Secret

by Tara Fox Hall

  “Were you Captain of the Guard, or something?”

  Devlin rolled his eyes. “You say that as if I had been having fun playacting. Believe me, overseeing guard duty was deadly serious in those days.”

  “I’m sorry. Go on.”

  “I didn’t have a title, other than what could be loosely translated into “The Leader,” Devlin said with a smile. “It was just another rung on the ladder on my way to the top.”

  “What happened to the murdering asshole?”

  “When we were attacked, he was killed.” Devlin’s tone turned full of hurt and bitterness. “Danial went back, as you know. I knew that there was nothing for me back there, that my father would never accept what I had become. I learned later that my father had been hung. The Duke suspected my father had planned the attack to cover the nobleman’s murder, that he’d had me kill him in revenge. As for my mother, she married another man to save herself from ruin.”

  “Did you have a wife, or someone you cared for?”

  “No, I had never been married,” Devlin said, shooting me an uneasy look. “I had several lovers at that time, but no one I loved. I’d wanted the woman Danial married for myself, but I had known that I couldn’t have her as he could, as she was below my station. My father wanted a good match with a family that would pay a large dowry. As it was, it was good I was turned, as my father planned to choose a wife for me in the coming summer. And then I would not be with you now.”

  “So you never married Anna?”

  “No,” Devlin admitted, clearly upset. “She wanted to. I Oathed her instead, believing she was safer.” He paused. “I should have. She would have been so happy.”

  I wiped away a single tear that had traced its way down his cheek. “I’m sorry, Dev. I don’t mean to pry.”

  “I don’t mind telling you, Sar,” he said, his tone rough with emotion. “It’s just that no one has asked me about my human life before, not even Anna.”

  Cleave came out and showed a slip of paper to Devlin. “Any corrections?”

  I looked at the drawing in Devlin’s hands. Cleave was a good artist. His drawing depicted a stalking grizzly with red eyes, snarling, its paw ready to strike. It was twice the size of the pendant on the choker.

  “Very nice,” Devlin said. “Put it on her left hip.”

  Cleave led me in to a brightly lit adjoining room, and had me sit in what resembled a dentists’ chair. I blinked, trying to let my eyes adjust.

  “Pull down your jeans on that side a little,” he asked as he laid out needle tips in plastic packaging and mixed up the inks. “That will be enough.”

  I pulled them down and leaned on my right side. Cleave used the paper to transfer the image to my hip, as Devlin pulled up a chair to watch.

  Cleave was a professional. First, he did the outline, then the details, and then he filled in the rest. The entire process took about an hour. As Devlin had said, there was some pain and blood, but not much. The overall sensation was as if someone was lightly sanding my skin. Occasionally there was a sharper poke, especially when he did the eyes and the bear’s fangs. We didn’t talk, as the noise from the needle gun was constant and loud enough to make conversation difficult. As I watched, the bear slowly appeared on my skin.

  Cleave got up. “You’re all set.”

  Dev’s bear snarled on my hip. It seemed to move as I moved. I ran my hands over it lightly, the skin red, raised, and sore to the touch. “It looks like I could wipe it off.”

  “Guaranteed not to,” Cleave assured me. “You need any touch ups, you just come back with Dev.”

  Dev had gotten his wish. “Thanks.”

  “Enjoy,” Cleave said, giving us a smile. “You want salve?”

  “Just a little,” Devlin replied. “For tonight, if it bothers her.”

  “Here.” Cleave handed me a tiny jar which I put it in my purse.

  “You want payment now or later?” Devlin said.

  “Now is good,” Cleave replied.

  Devlin handed him three hundred dollars from his back pocket. “Enough?”

  Cleave took it, nodding. “Always good doing business with you, Dev.” They clasped hands. “Have a safe trip back, and like I said, come back if you need a touch up.”

  “Thank you,” I said, giving him a smile.

  “Sure thing, Honey,” he said, winking at me.

  He stood in the doorway as we got in the truck, and Devlin started it. “Stop back in when you have more time!” Cleave shouted, waving.

  Devlin waved back, then sped off toward home. I sat back in the truck seat, considering the ramifications of this latest development. Almost at once, Devlin turned on the radio, tuning it to a classic rock station. Aerosmith engulfed us. I gave him a surprised look.

  He caught it. “What?”

  “I figured you for, um, lighter music. Maybe classical.”

  “I like most music, Sar,” Dev said, smirking. “What I listen to depends on my mood.” He turned the volume all the way up, until the music was blasting. “Let’s make some noise.”

  The whole way back, we shouted and sang along with the radio. While I knew some of the songs, Dev knew all of them. Despite his boisterous mood, he acted calmer now, as if by tattooing me he’d won a decisive battle. He glanced at me sporadically, satisfied.

  “Why did you want this so much?” I finally asked.

  “I wanted you to be mine,” he said, pleased. “And very shortly, you will be.”

  Uneasy at his certainty, I looked away and didn’t reply.

  As soon as we arrived at my house, Ghost and Darkness began whining, their tails wagging frantically.

  “They need to be walked,” I said quickly, hoping to buy time. “Will you come with me?”

  Devlin offered me his hand. “Yes, but let us go now. The rest of this night is for you and me.”

  We began walking. Though the night was clear and beautiful, I was focused only on Devlin, trying to determine what he was planning for me.

  “You’re unusually quiet,” he said, stopping and facing me. “Why?”

  “I was wondering why you’ve never asked me about myself,” I said shyly.

  “I know all of you I need to in this moment,” he said, pulling me into his embrace. “There will be much time to discover your quirks in our future, those that I don’t already know, of course.”

  “I’m not quirky,” I protested.

  “You most certainly are,” he said lovingly. “But that is good, as it makes you interesting, Love.”

  You are, too, but it makes you scary. “What exactly am I to promise you tonight?”

  Devlin began walking again, his arm around me. “As I told you, I want you to promise that my brother or I will be the only vampires you’ll have as lovers, and that you won’t share your blood with anyone else. If you want to be with Theo, that is understood. He has prior claim to you. But no one else, especially no other vampires, not under any circumstances.”

  “That’s all?”

  “No. If you remain his lover, Theo is never again to hurt you.”

  I stopped and looked at him in confusion. “Theo never hurt me, Dev.”

  He faced me, suddenly angry. “I saw the bruises on you the day I came to return Theo’s shirt. I smelled your blood where he had hurt you inside. That will not ever happen again.”

  “I gave him permission for that,” I said defiantly. “I wanted him to not hold back with me.”

  “You are not a woman who enjoys pain,” Dev said bluntly. “What he did to you had to hurt a good deal. He’s not going to do that again, ever.”

  “Dev, under normal circumstances, getting bitten hurts me. Are you going to stop biting me when it becomes painful again?”

  Devlin’s eyes tinged red. “It’s not the same. I can heal you afterwards, and take the pain away. He cannot.”

  I folded my arms across my chest. “Isn’t that my decision? I thought you didn’t begrudge me any pleasure I found in his arms?”

  Devlin grabbed me
roughly. “Sar, that is how it’s going to be. Accept it.”

  “Or what?” I said, jerking away from him.

  He yanked me back into his arms, threw me over his shoulder, and began striding back to the house.

  “Put me down!” I commanded shrilly. “Right now! I mean it!”

  “Shut up!” he snarled back.

  The dogs thought this was some sort of new game, leaping and jumping around him as he walked. After shooing them inside, he brought me into my bedroom. In one swift motion, he slid me off his shoulder and onto the bed. I landed on my newly tattooed hip, letting out a yelp. Devlin glared down at me, his eyes tinged red.

  “Ah, here is the Dev I remember,” I said nastily, then got up from the side of the bed. As I went for the door, he grabbed me by the throat.

  “Let me go, Dev,” I spat. “You don’t own me!”

  He squeezed his hand slightly, cutting off my ranting. “I do own you, Sar. And if you keep pushing it, I’ll show you just what it means to be owned by me.”

  A shiver of fear went down my spine at his cruel tone. Afraid, I relaxed in his grip and stopped fighting.

  Devlin relaxed his grip, then let go. “Sit back down.”

  I eased back on the bed, watching him warily.

  “The time of dreaming Dreams is over. As lover to lover, Sweetheart, I come.” Devlin paused, his eyes boring into me.

  “Who is the author?” I asked.

  “Sar, I want your Oath and I want it tonight. And I will have it, however I must draw it from your lips.”

  “I said I would give it to you—”

  “You actually didn’t.” He bared his fangs. “But you will give it to me now. Repeat after me—”

  “No,” I interrupted. “I wanted to look a certain way. I need to change clothes.”

  “Change then,” he said, widening his arms in a permissive gesture. “I’ll wait here for you. You have five minutes.”

  “Leave the room, please,” I replied, expecting a fight. “And I’ll take whatever time I need. You want this to mean anything to me, don’t force me.”

  Devlin’s eyes narrowed, but he nodded. “You’re right. My apologies, Love.” He kissed me gently on the cheek. “I’ll be outside the door. Call when you’re ready.”

  As soon as he left, I got up immediately, went into my bathroom, and looked in the mirror. What in hell was I thinking, doing this? He was the same person he had always been. Did it matter he had reasons for being the way he was? The violence and sadism in him was still there, no matter that he covered it with soft words and kisses now. It was only a matter of time before he showed his true colors again.

  Did I want him? That was a resounding yes.

  Did I trust him? To a point.

  Was I going through with this?

  I looked into the mirror at my reflection, considering everything.

  He’d saved me all those times before. He’d risked his life to save mine, even if he had enjoyed himself doing it. He’d given me a mark to wear without the usual painful cost. Now he’d sent Lash and Titus on some mission, saying he’d done it to protect me.

  I closed my eyes. Be logical, Sar. Put aside all the romance, the sweet words, and the dashing deeds in your defense. Grab what’s left of your reason out from under Dev’s thrall, and think.

  There was no way to know how much of his love for me was just longing for his Annabelle resurrected, or what the future he imagined for us would be like. Only time would tell.

  Dev wasn’t asking for all of me, just a part of me. I was getting something in exchange for being Oathed to him, namely his best efforts to protect me. That might make the difference between people I loved living or dying, including me, if I got him and his men to fight with us.

  I looked into the mirror, and took a deep breath. Was I going to do this?

  If he agreed to throw in his lot with Danial, yes.

  As he had so many times before, Dev had gotten just what he wanted. This time, it was me.

  Chapter Fifteen

  I took off my clothes and slipped into the pale ivory beaded nightgown. It still fit; the bodice tight over my breasts, the thin straps almost superfluous. It looked as good as it had years ago on me. I fluffed up my hair, put on a touch of lipstick and then rubbed it off. What was the point?

  Resigned, I picked it back up and reapplied it. The point was I needed Devlin to agree to my terms. Anything that might help that end, I had to do...

  Instantly, an idea sprang to mind. I went quickly to the bookshelf near the bed, scanning titles.

  “Sar,” Devlin called from outside the door. “I’m coming in.”

  I hastily grabbed a book of poems, and retreated to the bathroom. “Come in and get comfortable. I’ll be a few more minutes.”

  I heard him come in, then the noise of him shedding his clothes. Hurriedly, I used the book index, looking for an appropriate poem.

  “Come out,” Devlin called sexily. “Your lover aches for you.”

  I took a deep breath, and went out to him. He was waiting in bed, his clothes folded neatly on the dresser.

  He beckoned to me. I walked to the foot of the bed, faced him, and began to speak.

  “Is your heart an ocean so strong and deep I may launch my all on its tide?

  A loving woman finds heaven or hell on the day she is made a bride.

  I require all things that are grand and true, all things that a man should be

  If you give this all, I would stake my life to be all you demand of me.”

  “From a Woman’s Question,” Devlin said, studying me. “I know the poem well.”

  “Will you answer the question?” I asked seriously.

  He considered me for a few heartbeats. “You have my all, Sarelle,” he said finally. “That I promise you. To do whatever it takes, whatever is necessary.” He held out his hands. “Come.”

  I sat down beside him on the bed.

  “Repeat after me,” he said, holding my gaze. “I, Sarelle O’Connor, promise you, Devlin Dalcon, and your brother, Danial Racklan, that I shall be yours and no other vampire’s, under pain of death, until life should leave me, or both of you should perish.”

  I repeated what he had said.

  “I shall share myself with no other, save my current husband, Theo O’Connor, under pain of death.”

  I repeated that as well.

  “I give you my love and authority over me, understanding that I am given in return your love, your protection, and your life’s blood, that is now my life’s blood.”

  I repeated his words, wondering how much more was still to come.

  “So I swear, this day of December 29, 2012.”

  Relieved, I repeated that.

  “I, Devlin Dalcon, accept your Oath, Sarelle O’Connor, both on behalf of myself and on behalf of my brother, Danial Racklan.” He said the words slowly with pleasure, savoring each one. “I pledge you my love, and that of my brother’s, to protect you to the best of my ability, and to never deny you what you need—” Suddenly, he grabbed hold of me fiercely. “It is done,” he whispered. “You’re mine.”

  I didn’t answer, trembling.

  Devlin held me close, then began to speak:

  “I need so much the quiet of your love after the day’s loud strife

  I need your calm all other things above after the stress of life

  I crave the haven that in your dear heart lies after all toil is done.

  I need the star shine of your heavenly eyes after the day’s great sun.”

  “Towne’s Nightfall,” he added, kissing my forehead. He pushed me back gently onto the sheets, and held himself above me, looking down into my eyes intensely. “I’m going to take you now, Sarelle. We need to consummate the Oath, both with our bodies and with our blood.”

  I looked up at him apprehensively.

  Devlin’s golden eyes softened. “Relax, Love. You are my Oathed One. You have nothing to fear from me ever again.”

  He began kissing me. Soon, I re
laxed under his deft ministrations and embraced him fully, moving involuntarily under his hands, my skin hypersensitive to his kisses. Devlin parted my legs and began sliding inside inch by delicious inch. I arched up against him, trying to hurry him, but he would not be hurried. He held me still beneath him, even as I let out little whimpers, contracting my muscles, trying to get him into me.

  “I love how much you want me, Sar,” he said heatedly. “I love that you let it show to me and don’t try to hold it inside, as you did before.”

  At long last, Devlin eased the last of himself inside, then gave a soft groan of contentment. Slowly, he lay his upper body down on mine, still keeping most of his weight on his arms, and began kissing me, running his fangs over me, kissing my neck, my breasts, my face. My lust for him crashed over me, and I writhed beneath him, grasping his hips.

  Devlin let his weight down, pinning me to the bed. “No, Love. You will wait until I say, unbearable as that will quickly come to feel.” He began to kiss me again.

  My tension and desire mounted with every second, my heart beating furiously. “Please,” I moaned eagerly. “Please, I’m ready.”

  He took my face in his hands. “I know you are, Love, but I’m not. Wait for me.” He kissed me deeply, cutting off my reply.

  Maddened, I focused all my concentration to contract my inner muscles, squeezing the length of him tightly. Devlin’s head went back with a jerk, a tremor going through him. He lowered his eyes so they were an inch from mine. They were melting gold, bursting with desire and need. He gave me a slow smile, and began to move. I let out a long moan, awash in the blissful sensation.

  “You are never more beautiful, Sar, then when you are as you are now, open to me completely,” he whispered. “When we are joined together, as we were always meant to be.”

  Dev stroked me over and over, slowly, unhurried, his kisses gaining heat and passion. His breaths came fast, soft cries of pleasure escaping his lips every time he sheathed himself. I was wild beneath him, my hands caressing his slick flesh, my kisses covering all of his skin within reach. The impending orgasm built and built, until we were both shaking slightly with the strain.