At Last: A Pride and Prejudice Variation

by Anne Morris

  "Is this your first visit to Scarborough, Colonel?" she asked.

  "Actually it is not, my general has sent me on such an errand once before," answered Colonel Fitzwilliam. "But I do not mind, and do whatever it is he asks of me, and how about you, Miss Bennet? Is this your first visit to Scarborough or are you, like Mrs. Peterson, a resident here?"

  "No. We are here, my mother and sister and I—and my little brother—on a visit. But this visit, like yours, is not our first to Scarborough. We came many years ago," she explained.

  "Your little brother would not be that scamp, Master Simon that I have heard tales of?" he laughed heartily.

  "I fear he is, I should like to hear what is being said about him," she looked over at Captain Gage.

  "He is a charming young man, and we have had a good time together," said Captain Gage, assuring her there had been no real trouble where Simon Bennet was concerned. Her sister Lydia was, perhaps, a different matter.

  "Simon thinks the world of you," she replied. "Even before this trip, he played at being a solider even if he is fated in life to be a gentleman and a landowner." The two soldiers looked at each other, and then back at Miss Bennet.

  "He has a better lot in life than we do," said the Captain. She thought that considering the war, and its cost in lives that this was true. They were called into dinner then.

  There was not an even number of gentleman to ladies, but Elizabeth found herself next to Colonel Fitzwilliam on one side and next to a Miss Gosford on the other. The colonel conversed with Elizabeth—and the lady on his right—with the readiness and ease of a well-bred man. He was not handsome, but in person and address was most truly a gentleman, and with him seated next to her, they talked agreeably of Scarborough, of her own county, Hertfordshire, of traveling and of staying at home. He, like so many of the other men who met Miss Bennet, was taken by both her pleasing face and her intelligence. If he neglected poor Miss Kates on his right side, it was unconsciously done.

  The dinner was excellent, and there were a number of courses, so they had a lot of time to cover a variety of subjects. She was surprised to learn, more than halfway through the meal, that he was actually connected to the Darcy family and was, in fact, Mr. Darcy's cousin.

  "I have been blessed with multiple reasons to come, both to inspect the barracks as my general has ordered, but to give news about how my brother's family fares, and to see how my cousins fare, for I share the guardianship of Miss Darcy."

  "You do!" cried Elizabeth, "I had not known that Mr. Darcy shared such responsibilities with anyone else."

  "Yes, and he has expressed some dissatisfaction with her friends, and the nature of their relationships, so I am here to see if I can persuade Georgiana to leave, and to help extract his little family from Scarborough," he replied. "Darcy and I are to make our annual Easter trip to Kent, to visit our aunt, and need to ensure Georgiana is settled; either at Pemberley or set up in an establishment somewhere." Elizabeth was taken aback by his words, as she considered that the friend Mr. Darcy objected to—and had written to this cousin about—was her own sister, Lydia. She made some small comment, and he continued. "We initially considered sending her and Mrs. Younge to Ramsgate this spring, but Darcy feels that the experiences of a watering-hole have not been the best for Georgiana, so we are most likely going to settle her at Pemberley."

  "And what if your charge gives you trouble? Young ladies at this age can often be so difficult, you know," she said in as teasing a manner as she could, to hide her own annoyance and agitation, but he seemed to catch something in the tone of her voice, and looked at her with a little more perception. "Do not worry; I am not anticipating any particular issue for you. I have, you know, four younger sisters, and we have had our squabbles in the past." He smiled then, and they spoke about Scarborough a little more, before he talked again of his family and their plans.

  "We have so often spent the spring together in London," he said. "Darcy is rather fond of the Season, though I missed a few Seasons because of my duties to King and country. But with my new post to my general, we should be able to take up enjoying all that London can afford us," He smiled, his eyebrows raised, and again she suspected that there was far more than either gentleman would share with her about those enjoyments.

  "You do not strike me as a man so taken with society," she said, with a small shake of her head.

  "All military men love society, Miss Bennet," he declared. "I have further inducement to get Darcy to come, as his friend Bingley is there still. I had heard this friend was considering returning to his rented house, but Darcy hoped to convince him to stay in London with us for the Season."

  Elizabeth could not help the short intake of breath. She had not considered Mr. Bingley for quite a while, but Jane's letter from just yesterday had held an underlying tone of unhappiness. Elizabeth had been able to tell how much Jane was still affected by Mr. Bingley, how much Jane missed him, how much she still admired him. She was angry to think of Mr. Darcy suggesting that Mr. Bingley not return to Hertfordshire just so Mr. Darcy could have another companion for his pleasures in London. She was so angry that she could not trust herself to continue speaking of London, so changed the subject to one of music, and the dinner came to an end soon.

  There were card tables set up, and she wondered if she would be able to sit with Mr. Wolton-Fane to speak more with him, but Miss Church slipped her hand in hers, and they were paired together, and two more ladies joined up with them, Miss Gosford and a Miss Pratt, and Elizabeth spend a rather dull evening discussing dowries and the relative merits of gentlemen as if gentlemen could only be appraised by their acreage and their annual income. Elizabeth was pleased when the evening came to a close, and they returned home to Silver House.

  She considered what Colonel Fitzwilliam had told her about Mr. Darcy, and her estimation of him sunk even lower. She thought with some fondness of how soon it would be until they were to return home. Lydia was likely to maintain a correspondence with Miss Darcy, but Elizabeth thought with a certain pleasure that she would see the last of the gentleman from Pemberley.

  Fifteen

  —

  Two Proposals

  The next morning, she had no wish to visit the dressmakers with her mother and Lydia, so Elizabeth said she was indisposed and stayed home, telling Mrs. Bennet she would go to the dressmakers later; under no circumstances did she wish to be out walking the streets lest she run into Mr. Darcy. She knew that Mr. Wolton-Fane would not be at the post office in the morning since he was traveling, and Elizabeth recalled how often she had run into Mr. Darcy and did not wish such an encounter.

  A sound startled her, and a servant showed Mr. Darcy into the parlor unannounced. She was surprised to see him, surprised that he would seek her out given what he had said to her and her mother about her own sister two days before, and from what she had heard at the party from his own cousin. Elizabeth considered what she had been recalling—his behavior at the Netherfield ball upsetting Jane so much, what Mr. Wickham had said, and what she knew of his character, his pride in himself and his disdain for anyone else. But that man stood before her, and she found she could barely be polite to him; she could barely maintain a semblance of manners, so lowly was she thinking of him just then.

  Mr. Darcy inquired after her health, "you did not go for your walk, are you feeling well, Miss Bennet?"

  "Perfectly well, I thank you," she replied coldly, hoping he had merely stopped by to see why she was not seeking exercise and that he would go away again soon. He stood there looking at her. She sat down without saying anything, without inviting him to sit, simply wishing for him to leave. He turned from her as if to go, but then paced back and stopped to look at her.

  "You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you," came tumbling from his lips.

  If there was anything that Mr. Darcy had to say to her it was certainly not that, and her astonishment was beyond expression. She stared, colored, doubted and was silent.

 
; He continued. "It is not logical that I should love you, and yet my heart flickers and flames whenever you are around. I have been entranced by your beauty and your wit, your grace and your intelligence." His face was still its usual impassive mask, but his eyes darted around her face, landing on and capturing her eyes. "Though, as I said, it is not logical to love you. Your father is a gentleman, that is true, but your mother's family is a different matter. And the behavior of your sisters is definitely something that is wanting."

  As she listened, she was not entirely unfeeling as to what he was telling her; to hear a man express his admiration and love for her was flattering. She knew what that was like; had heard that before. To have it be such a gentleman as Mr. Darcy—to have secured his affections—was gratifying. At first, she was sorry for the pain he was to receive when she rejected him, but the longer he spoke, the more he spoke about his own objections to marrying her, to his having any logical reason to align himself with her, and the more he detailed all of his objections to their match, the more she found anger rising inside her, though she tried to remain composed until he finished.

  He concluded, "but I have not been able to reason myself out of loving you, dear Elizabeth. They have been at war, my mind and my heart, but it is my heart that has prevailed for once, and I hope you will reward it by accepting my hand."

  His mask was gone as he finished his speech, she could see assurance and confidence now on his face even in how he stood, in the set of his shoulders; his countenance expressed real security as he had no doubt of a favorable answer from her. His bearing only exasperated Elizabeth further, and when he finished, color spread to her cheeks, but she answered him readily.

  "In such a situation, I believe I am required to express some sort of…obligation for the sentiments you have stated. Though I must confess I am feeling hard pressed just how to do that. I cannot say that I feel grateful for the feelings you have shared; circumstances were such that we have been thrown together quite a lot recently, but I cannot say yours is an acquaintance that I would have chosen. I am sorry if what I say pains you, but as you said, you have been at war with yourself and as this was" she cleared her throat, "…as I am not a logical choice for you as bride, you can have little difficulty in overcoming your heart's sentiments."

  Mr. Darcy still stood tall and straight with his eyes fixed on her face, and that very face now displayed resentment with flashes of anger. Some struggles were also visible there as though he disliked the flare of anger that flamed inside. It was a scene that Elizabeth found dreadful, and she wondered if he would not simply turn on the spot and leave, or if he would lash out at her in that anger. When he did speak, his voice had a forced calmness.

  "This is all you will say to me! Might I ask why, with so little civility on your part, why you have rejected me?"

  "Might I ask you the same question?" she replied. "Why did you frame an offer in such a way that it was so offensive and insulting? Could that not be the reason for my incivility if I was uncivil? But I have other reasons."

  "Mr. Wolton-Fane, I suppose," he interrupted, bringing his hands up, but then laying them back down by his sides.

  "I do not know that you have the right to question my acquaintance with that gentleman, Mr. Darcy. I have certainly enjoyed the little bit of time I have had in Mr. Wolton-Fane's company; he has a well-informed and intelligent mind and has introduced me to topics I heretofore knew nothing about," she said.

  "What of your curricle ride last Saturday?" she raised an eyebrow in surprise at his question.

  "What about the ride, what facts do you wish to know, Mr. Darcy? The topics we covered, what we ate at our luncheon, or are you implying something else? If such, I suggest you question my maid, Sally. I can call her down for you if you wish," she gestured towards the bell pull. He said nothing to this suggestion.

  "I did once, Mr. Darcy, say I wished to attempt to understand your character, but it is a statement like the one you just made which fixes in my mind the assurance that you are an arrogant and conceited man, selfish in your outlook, and ready to condemn others. I wonder that you seek me out, and yet I have long suspected you in having a hand in ruining the happiness of my sister Jane—of separating her from Mr. Bingley. And then there is the matter of my other sister, Lydia. You have been quite vocal about how much you object to her, and yet you still seek me out, despite these disgusting connections. How do you justify such contradictory behavior?"

  "It is true that I both encouraged my friend to not be hasty in considering marriage, and that I have long objected to the behavior of your youngest sister." His tone and answer did nothing to overcome her distrust, and she bristled at his reply.

  "I also heard of your rather unjust and ungenerous part in denying Mr. Wickham his just dues in life. Are you, in fact as whimsical a creature as we once asserted Mr. Bingley to be? And abandoned a friend because he did not suit your ideas of right or was not of the correct sphere?" she cried.

  "Here is another gentlemen to whom you pay close attention," he remarked with what sounded like a sneer.

  "Are you to parade all my acquaintance with gentlemen before me to find fault with them?" she cried. "I once spent four days with a Mr. Darcy at Netherfield Hall; perhaps you need to examine his acquaintance with Elizabeth Bennet as well. He was, as I mentioned, this arrogant and conceited man despite, I admit, appearances of intelligence in his conversation. And excepting one little instance of kindness one day in the gardens, he has continually struck me as a man willing to trade on the misfortunes of others as if they were merely pawns in a game, as they suited his fancy or interest in a way I cannot fathom. For example, your question about Charlotte Lucas' parentage, why did you ask me that?"

  "Curiosity, nothing more," he replied.

  "Yet these are people you are curious about Mr. Darcy, not some scientific marvel to be looked upon, examined, and written about dispassionately. Some of these people are those whom I love dearly and some have been hurt by your 'curiosity.' Leaving aside Jane's case because it is not your family member, let us consider Lydia and Georgiana's friendship for they are friends, no matter that you would wish it otherwise. Are you going to leave Scarborough and tell your sister she must have no further contact with mine? Would you hurt your sister so?"

  "I do everything possible to care for my sister's safety and reputation which includes monitoring her acquaintance and directing her towards more appropriate friends." Elizabeth felt she could not grow any angrier, but his statement almost caused her to stand to better look him in the eye. He, however, continued.

  "And this is your opinion of me!" He began to pace in front of her. "This is the estimation in which you hold me!" He stopped pacing to look at her again. She noticed he held his arms stiffly at his sides, but his hands were clamped in fists. "Perhaps you would have overlooked the offenses you hurl in my direction so freely if I had not been so honest about my struggles with your family's background and their behavior? I should have concealed my struggles and flattered you, I suppose, that I come to you without any doubts?"

  She did stand then, but was able to speak with composure still. "No, Mr. Darcy, the mode of your declaration affected me in no other way than it spared me the worry about how you would feel when I refused you, had you behaved in a more gentleman-like manner." His astonishment was plainly marked on his face as he registered her words. "I believe from almost the first moment of our acquaintance your want of manners, your lack of the consideration of others, your disdain for anyone not of your sphere, and your conceit—that pride you so embrace—impressed me with your arrogance that I had not known you a month before I felt you were the last man in the world whom I could ever be prevailed on to marry." She turned to pull the bell cord for the maid.

  "You have said quite enough!" His hands came up again, and he looked away, turned to speak to the wall, "I understand you and now am only ashamed of my own feelings." He spared her one glance before the maid opened the door, and he hastily left the room.

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  She was overwhelmed with a tumult of feelings after Mr. Darcy left, and Elizabeth attempted to stave off tears while she reviewed the scene that had just occurred. Mr. Darcy had made her an offer of marriage! He said he had loved her, and that his heart had won over a battle which had raged inside, his internal struggles had been extreme from what he had expressed—logic had almost won, but love had prevailed.

  And yet, he had such contradictory behavior. He so strongly and unfairly objected to Lydia's acquaintance with Georgiana yet would offer himself to her. He said he had discouraged Mr. Bingley's seeking Jane's hand, and his cousin had said he hoped they could—all three men—enjoy the Season together. And what about Mr. Wickham and denying him his just due in a manner which had dishonored his very own father? There had been elements of jealousy too which she put down simply to being a rejected suitor.

  Curiosity and logic seemed to be his overriding motivations in life—perhaps it accounted for his cool manner, but as she had asserted, curiosity was dangerous when people were involved. Was Wickham's case another matter of curiosity? To see if one ruined a man to see how he would recover and fare afterward? It might just be the type of experiment Mr. Darcy would indulge in. She could not think why Mr. Darcy should ruin a man he ought to be friends with, a man he had known since they were youth—she thought of the friends she had known from Meryton who were so dear to her. She would never venture to experiment in such a way; why had he dropped the relationship with this childhood acquaintance?

  Mr. Darcy would, no doubt, send word round on the morrow to say he and his sister were to be off, and leave Scarborough altogether. He would, no doubt, ban Georgiana from speaking or corresponding with Lydia. She burst into tears then to think of the unfairness that would be inflicted on her poor, youngest sister because of this. Deciding she was not fit to be seen, Elizabeth ran upstairs to her room.