What to Expect When Your Demon Slayer is Expecting

by Angie Fox

  “He came to me in the other realm,” I said. I hoped he knew I’d made it back. After all he went through at the end, not knowing just seemed too cruel.

  She nodded. “We thought we’d lost you.” She snorted. “Then your idiot husband refused to wait for us to even come up with another way to reach you.”

  He stiffened behind me. “There was no time.” He wrapped his arms around me from behind, supporting me. “I saw Xavier die, and I felt his connection to you break. I knew your spirit would be lost if we left you like that, so I took his place.”

  “Damn fool,” Grandma said, but there was no heat to it anymore. “He went by feel, if you can believe that, Lizzie. Like feelings are some sort of compass.”

  Dimitri rubbed my arms. “I had to do it. I wasn’t about to lose you and our babies without doing everything I possibly could to get you back. If I failed, at least then I wouldn’t have to live without you.”

  Oh my god. He’d thought he was watching me—us, his family—die. I squeezed his arms around me. “I’m so grateful you found me,” I said, turning to him. “Still, I’d never want you to die for me.”

  He kissed my hair, one arm rubbing soothingly down my back. “Good thing it’s not up to you, then,” he remarked. “And it really wasn’t as dangerous as they’re making it out to be.”

  “Oh no?” Ant Eater rolled her eyes. “You wanna share how throwing your spirit into the deep end of the pool without knowing how to swim ain’t dangerous?”

  Creely rolled her eyes. “It’s why portals were invented,” she said impatiently. “So you don’t get stuck between dimensions.”

  Dimitri gave a small chuckle. “Lizzie and I are connected by more than love and marriage,” he said. His thumb rubbed across the emerald necklace’s bronze chain at the back of my neck. “Our spirits are connected as well. I know what she feels like inside and out. I could find her in a snowstorm or a blackout or across dimensions.”

  Oh, my word. He was so unlucky the biker witches were here. If we were alone, I’d show him exactly how his words made me feel.

  “It explains how you found her,” Grandma said, crossing her arms over her chest. “But how did you get her back?”

  “Ooh la la,” I said, snuggling closer to him. “You did something so cool the biker witches don’t know how to do it.”

  I could hear the smile in his voice. “I followed my clan Helios bonds. I’ve always been strongly connected to my sisters—you all know that.”

  Did we ever. They were the reason he’d come after me in the first place—he’d needed a slayer in order to save them from a demon’s curse. He’d ended up falling in love and staying for my sake. His sisters were still hugely important to him.

  “All I had to do was follow the worry,” he continued, sounding more amused than upsetting his sisters like that probably merited. “And the swearing.”

  “That was a hell of a thing to gamble on, honey,” Frieda said from the back, cracking her gum like a whip. Her eyes were soft, though. “But I hear you. Nobody wanted to think about livin’ in a world without our Lizzie in it.”

  Our Lizzie. I was theirs, really theirs, friend and family and more, and they were mine. The way I’d managed to summon the coven to help me had proved that. For a good portion of my life, I had wanted more family than I’d had. I’d convinced myself that Hillary and Cliff were disappointed in me, and that everything would be better once I was back with my real family. That had been a mixed blessing, to say the least, but now—finally—I thought I’d figured out the truth.

  Family was so much more than who you were born to. Family was who raised you, who cared for you, who kissed your cheek before putting you to sleep, and who taught you to ride a bike. Family was a group of crazy witches who would follow you to Hell and back—literally—and fight to keep you safe. Family was the person who loved you more than anyone else in the world and would do desperate things in the name of that love. For me, family was even my birth father.

  Oh, Xavier. I hoped he’d gone back to where he’d fallen from, in the end.

  I brushed a tear away with the back of my hand and looked up at my husband. “Thank you for protecting me.”

  “Always.” He gazed at me like I’d hung the moon. “Always, Lizzie.” He leaned down for a kiss, and I stretched up to meet him. Our lips touched, and the love that poured through my body made me shiver with pure contentment. Everything I’d been missing about the spirit realm, the strength of a true connection, was right here. This was no echo, no shadow of what had once been—this was my husband in my arms, real and solid and wonderful.

  Someone whistled. Someone else—Creely, I thought—started making predictions about how long the kiss would last. I ignored it all until—

  “Ahem.”

  Oh jeez. I’d forgotten my mom was here. I could handle the witches catcalling me, but my mother was another matter entirely. I broke the kiss and glanced over at her. She had a glass of water in one hand and her cell phone in the other.

  She smiled and handed me the water. “Well, I’m very glad you’re feeling better, Lizzie. However, you did just endure a rather traumatic experience. It’s probably not a bad idea for you to make sure you’re hydrated. You also need to go to a hospital and get checked out.”

  Ugh, hospitals. I took a sip of the cool, clear water. It tasted so good I polished the whole thing off in one long pull. “I think I’m fine, Mom,” I said once I was done.

  “That’s nice,” she began. Yikes. That was what she always said when it wasn’t nice at all. “But there’s more involved in this than just you these days, honey.” She glanced down at my abdomen. “We want to make sure the babies are doing well. And,” she added, with a twinkle in her eye, “they’ll probably want to do an ultrasound, which means baby pictures!”

  22

  One doctor’s visit later, I found myself lying in a hospital bed with an IV in my wrist. It wasn’t serious—“mild anemia and dehydration” according to the doc, but since I had to get an ultrasound anyway and Hillary was in charge of things, that meant a private room, rehydration therapy, and a ton of visitors.

  Personally, I was willing to endure anything just to be alive and whole—and with my family.

  Still, it was a darn good thing the wide, beige-and-blue room was private, all things considered. Most of the witches had already been in and out, bringing in everything from anatomically correct balloons that spelled CUMGRATULATIONS STRAIGHT SHOOTER! to a perfume atomizer from the gift shop that had been repurposed as a spell sprayer.

  They were more slaphappy than they usually were after a victory. I’d told them about their friends on the other side, how well they were doing. How they’d helped. Even Ant Eater’s eyes had welled with pride.

  Then she’d stepped back, gotten busy, and warded the heck out of the room. That meant no one that was even having a bad day wanted to come anywhere near the place. On the negative side, the spell contained skunkweed, which—yeah, nasty. Pirate had gotten so excited by it that Frieda had had to take him for a walk just to clear his nose. I could see them out the wide window to my right, in some trees past the parking area, searching for the perfect spot.

  “Oh my goodness.” Hillary’s pale pink heels clicked on the tile. She still hadn’t put down the picture the doctor had printed off from the ultrasound. In fact, she’d gone and put it in a silver Tiffany frame that she’d had stashed in her purse. Yes, in her purse, because who knew when you’d need to immortalize something in fashionable silver? That was my mom. She bent her head over the photo, the feathery ends of her blond bob grazing her chin. “Look at those little heads just nestled together! They’re so sweet!”

  “They are,” I said, welling with pride. I couldn’t wait to meet them.

  Ant Eater took a look over Mom’s shoulder. “They look more like aliens than babies,” she announced, scratching her head under her Red Skull do-rag. “Slits for eyes, tiny flailing limbs…creepy.”

  Hillary, to my complete surprise, d
idn’t jump down Ant Eater’s throat. She just laughed. “They’re only ten weeks along, you can’t expect them to look like actual babies yet. But this is the first picture of many.” She closed her eyes and hugged—hugged—the frame. “I’m so excited! Oh, Lizzie, Dimitri.” She looked at me expectantly. “Tell me I can host the baby shower for you. I’ve got the perfect place all picked out.”

  Oh my. “Where is that?” I asked, my grip on Dimitri’s hand tightening a little. He sat next to me on my bed, arm around my shoulders, keeping me close. He had barely let go of me since I woke up. I kind of liked it.

  “The country club has a brand-new ballroom opening up next spring, right next to their gardens! It’s already booking up, but I’ve got enough pull to get us a reservation there any time you want.”

  A country club. Hoo-boy. “I’m not sure we’re really that kind of crowd,” I told my mom gently. Heck, just imagining the things the witches might get up to in my parents’ staid and prissy country club made me want to reach for a bucket full of Mind Wipers. We’d need them.

  Before Mom’s face could fall, though, Ant Eater piped up. “I kind of like it.” She nudged Hillary. “I’ve always wanted to party in a posh place like that.”

  “Oh, you will just love it.” Hillary patted her on the nudgy elbow while simultaneously taking out her phone. “The club is beautiful and completely refurbished and also very heavily insured against accidental damages! Let me show you the pictures.” She glanced at me. I must have worn my disapproval on my sleeve. “Here.” She tugged Ant Eater toward the door. “Come out into the hall with me for better light.”

  I turned to Dimitri. “And I thought it was a miracle when you pulled me from the void.”

  Grandma snatched the frame from Mom’s hands as the door flapped behind the unlikely baby shower planners. “You know once those two decide, there ain’t no un-deciding,” she remarked, making her way over to the bed. She settled in next to us, looking at it with an odd expression.

  “I never saw pictures like this of my girls,” she said, tapping the frame with one long finger. “Probably for the best. Phoenix and Serefina spent so much time smacking into each other in there, I doubt a doctor could have even gotten a steady pic of ’em.”

  “Serefina looks good,” I said. I’d told her all about our encounter.

  “Yeah.” Grandma flushed with pride.

  Still, I felt for her. Looking back had to be rough. One of her daughters was dead, and the other was a coward who’d abandoned everything her mother had tried to teach her. I groped for something else to say.

  Grandma chuckled before I could get a single word out. “They were little hellions as toddlers. Never slept at the same time—one would be napping and the other would be caterwauling at the top of her lungs. And oh, you haven’t lived until you’ve tried to feed, change, and soothe two babies at once, let me tell you!” She turned a grin on me that looked inordinately gleeful.

  She scratched absently at the tattoo of a phoenix on her arm. “Pregnancy is a beautiful thing, kiddo, but swollen ankles, a sore back, disgusting food cravings, and giving up your entire wardrobe for months ain’t the greatest. Lucky for you, you’ve got all of us around to lend a hand.”

  “Heavens to Betsy.” I hadn’t considered that. I turned to Dimitri, hoping I didn’t look as shell-shocked as I felt. “She’s exaggerating, right?”

  Dimitri wasn’t quite smiling, but I could see he wanted to from the way the corners of his eyes creased. “Actually, from what I remember of my sisters as babies…no, she’s pretty much right on.” He tugged me closer. “We’re not going to be getting a lot of sleep for a few years. But,” he continued as my mouth dropped open, “we’ll have plenty of help—probably more than we want, honestly—and it’ll all be worth it.”

  “Yeah?” I raised an eyebrow playfully. “Are you planning on being this lovey-dovey with me when I’ve got a belly out to here?” I stretched the arm that wasn’t attached to an IV out in front of me.

  Dimitri did smile this time. “Even more so,” he promised. “More every day.” He bent, about to kiss me, but then his phone beeped. “Hang on.” He checked the text message, and his expression fell. “Oh, shit.”

  “What?” I demanded. He didn’t say anything, so I poked him in the side. “What?”

  My big bad griffin fought back a cringe. “My sisters are—”

  “Lizzie! Dimitri!” The door flew open and twin tornadoes hurtled through like the place was on fire. Diana and Dyonne had arrived, almost as colorful as their griffin forms in red and blue sundresses and yellow sandals.

  Oh my. “Aren’t they supposed to be in Greece?”

  “Santorini,” Dimitri remarked dryly.

  Not that I was complaining.

  “Surprise!” Diana exclaimed from the doorway.

  Dyonne pushed past her, her arms loaded with shopping bags. “We have had plans for months to come out for your birthday.” She handed a bunch of bags to a startled Ant Eater. “Then all this craziness happened, and you had us worried sick.”

  Dimitri’s sisters dodged my meal tray and a cardboard cutout of a doctor that the witches had snagged from the gift shop. They came at me in a flurry of jostling elbows and dropped packages before making it to my bedside.

  “It’s a great surprise,” I said, accepting hugs and congratulations.

  Diana pushed a long dark strand of hair out of her face. “Dimitri didn’t make it easy,” she said, and when Dimitri opened his mouth, she added, “Why else did you think Dyonne was so pushy about getting details from you?”

  “General female nosiness?” Dimitri offered.

  “Not this time,” Dyonne said.

  “We were focused on other things.” Diana grinned.

  “Like giving the plane a little bit of assistance with a tailwind on the way over,” Dyonne supplied with a Mona Lisa smile designed not to give anything away. Her short layered hair did seem a bit windblown. “The pilot said it was the fastest time he’d ever clocked from Athens to Atlanta.”

  “How fast?” Dimitri asked, not amused.

  “Does it really matter?” Dyonne waved him off. “That’s all in the past now!” She put her hands on her hips. “What matters is you freaking us out long distance, while we were at the airport, and then not even bothering to pick up the phone when we landed. I called from the tarmac, the tarmac!”

  “I texted,” Dimitri shot back, a little halfhearted.

  “Oh, what, this text?” Diana turned on her phone and read straight from it. “‘Lizzie and babies safe, don’t worry.’ And I said, what? This is the first mention we’ve had of any babies, and then what have you done when I try to call? You’ve turned your phone off!”

  Dimitri shifted uncomfortably against my side. “Lizzie was sleeping. I didn’t want to wake her.”

  Diana threw her hands up in the air. “Lizzie and babies! And babies! What—you—how could you just—” She exhaled hard, shook her head, then sat down on the other side of my bed, which was getting pretty tight at this point. “Are you okay?” she asked seriously.

  “I’m fine,” I assured her. “There was a bit of a throwdown—”

  “In a manner of speaking,” Grandma added.

  “But it’s all handled now!” I finished cheerfully. “This is just to get me rehydrated. We’ll be out of here in an hour, probably.”

  “So everyone is all good?” Dyonne practically bounced up and down with excitement. “Do you know what you’re having yet?”

  “Girls.” The ultrasound hadn’t been definitive, but I knew Xavier had been right. “We’re having baby girls.”

  “Eeeeeeeee!” Matching squeals and hands on faces made Dimitri’s sisters look like teenagers. I grinned while he winced.

  “Oh my gosh, this is perfect, and I brought the most amazing presents,” Diana exclaimed. “They were going to be presents for you, brother, but you’ve been demoted. We’re giving them to the babies.”

  “They’re out in the car with Antonio
,” Dyonne added. “We thought they were a little too big to bring into the hospital.”

  “What are they?” I asked at the same time Dimitri said, “Antonio? Antonio who?”

  “Not that Antonio, the other Antonio,” Diana assured him. “The one with the Pegasus breeding program? It’s brilliant. He’s got a fantastic stud with a wingspan of over—”

  “Saddles,” Dyonne interjected with an eye roll. “She brought enchanted saddles. They can shrink down to child size just fine. They’re intended for use with a flying horse, but they’d be okay on a grounded one too. Cute, but a bit predictable. My fiancé and I brought you—”

  “Wait, what, your fiancé?” Dimitri stood up from the bed and charged around to their side of the room, his face going thundery. “Since when have you been engaged?”

  Dyonne went all mushy. “It was all rather sudden. And romantic. And adventurous!”

  “For both of us,” Diana agreed. “In fact, it just happened. Whirlwind courtship, just like in romance novels. I thought for sure Kryptos would have spilled the beans.” She nudged Dyonne.

  “Kryptos?” Dimitri asked. “The weapons maker?”

  Dyonne nodded. “That’s my fiancé.”

  The mighty griffin who had faced down demons and death appeared as if he were about to fall over.

  “Dimitri had his phone off,” Diana reminded her sister. “Good thing.”

  Well, I was thrilled for them both. “Congratulations!” I gushed. I remembered Kryptos. He’d been Dyonne’s childhood friend. He was a powerful griffin, a rather attractive man, and he was willing to put himself on the line when it counted. Dyonne could certainly do worse.

  “He’s so dreamy,” she agreed. “And he’s always said it’s never too soon to get your kids used to sword fighting. Given your circumstances, he has a good point. Each of my nieces will have a set of enchanted swords, bucklers, and breastplates! They’ll grow with the girls,” she added proudly, “and the edges of the swords will be spelled to stay blunt when they spar each other until they turn eighteen.”