Down & Dirty

by Cheryl Dougls

  “What about your parents?” he asked, falling into step beside me. “You couldn’t count on them?”

  “They supported my education, but I knew I couldn’t expect any more from them. If I wanted to start my own label, I had to figure out a way to do it without them.”

  “So, you went to the bank?” he asked, leading me to our spot.

  The top of rock was large and flat, making it a perfect resting spot. The elevation was breathtaking, with the water and blue sky coming together, surrounded by green grass and wild flowers. I hadn’t been to this spot since high school, mainly because it reminded me too much of Landon.

  “No, Justin came to me.” I smiled when he handed me a crusty bun piled high with pastrami and my favorite assortment of cheeses. “Thanks.”

  “Ah, so Justin got to be your hero, huh?”

  I could tell he was on edge, trying to make sense of my relationship with my friend and business partner. “He wasn’t my hero. He was my partner. It so happens he had a huge trust fund and had to figure out how to spend it.”

  “Poor guy,” he said, rolling his eyes. “I really feel for him.”

  “He’s not like that,” I said, instinctively rising to Justin’s defense. “He’s not an arrogant ass, just ‘cause he comes from money. He’s become a venture capitalist and helped dozens of small business owners just like me who would’ve been screwed without him.”

  I’d never be able to thank Justin for all he’d done for me, but I could at least defend him to people like Landon, who thought they knew the kind of man he was. But were dead wrong.

  “Sounds like you still have pretty strong feelings for this guy,” he said, staring out at the lake.

  He was still wearing shades, but I could tell by the tense set of his jaw that he was pissed. “I do. I love him.” I let him absorb that before I added, “He’s one of my best friends, Landon. I love him… as a friend. Nothing more.”

  “You sure about that?”

  “When we were together I thought it was more,” I admitted. “But when it came down to it, we both had to admit we weren’t in it for the long haul.” I sighed as he watched me. “But he and my sister, that’s another story. I really thought they had a chance, but she’s too damn stubborn to—”

  “Hold up. Justin and your sister have a thing?”

  “Had. Have. I don’t know, but yeah, they’ve been a couple. In fact, she spent the night at his house last night.” I didn’t know why I told him that, except Landon had once been my boyfriend and my friend, someone I could always confide in and it still felt natural to do so.

  “Why didn’t you tell me that last night when I went off on you about your ex?”

  “Maybe I was looking for an excuse to bail on you.” It was hard to admit the truth, but I knew I had to come clean. “Things were getting too real.”

  He remained silent as he opened his roast beef sandwich and took a big bite. “I guess I knew that. That’s why I didn’t come after you right away. I knew you’d need time to process what happened between us.” He looked at me out of the corner of his eye. “So have you… processed it?”

  I knew he was asking whether I’d softened, whether I could really see giving this relationship another chance, but I didn’t have any answers for him. This morning I would have said, Hell, no! But spending this time with him, just talking made me wonder whether it was time to let go of my hurt and animosity.

  “I went to the reunion last night with one goal in mind,” I said, tearing off a corner of the sandwich and popping it in my mouth. “Revenge.”

  He chuckled. “How’d that work out for you?”

  I bumped shoulders with him, smiling in spite of myself. “Shut up, smart ass.”

  “Admit it, you took one look at me and all the old feelings came back.”

  I knew he was teasing, but his assessment wasn’t far from the truth. “Would you get a swelled head if I told you I felt something when we danced?” He grinned and I said, “And I’m not talking about the little something between your legs.”

  “Little?” he asked, coughing. “Did you just say little? Do I have to remind you how big-?”

  “No, thank you. I’m still walking funny today, so I remember just fine.”

  It felt nice to tease him again, to laugh and smile, and just be real with him. I knew most women probably pandered to him and I didn’t want to be one of them. I wanted him to think of me as someone different, special. Even if he thought of me as a giant pain in the ass sometimes.

  “You’re not really sore, are you?” he asked, his tone low and intimate as he brushed his lips against my ear. “Because that would put a serious crimp in my plans for later.”

  “Pretty sure of yourself, aren’t you, Harris?” The thought of winding up back in his hotel room made all my lady parts buzz with excitement.

  “It’s not easy to keep my hands off you,” he admitted. “But I knew we needed this time, just to talk. I don’t want it to be all about the sex, Liv. As much as I love having sex with you, this has to be… more.”

  It had been a long time since I’d been willing to consider more than a physical relationship with a man. Even my last boyfriend had been a matter of convenience rather than a deep and lasting connection.

  “How much more?” I wasn’t sure how much more I could give him. My career was demanding. I travelled extensively for work. Had a lot of friends. Family. And a girl had to get her beauty sleep.

  “As much as you’re willing to give me.”

  So he was willing to let me call the shots? Interesting. “Are we talking about a casual relationship?” I asked, trying to be nonchalant as I took another small bite of my sandwich. “You know, where we both see other people.”

  He glared at me. “Hell, no.” After another lingering look that probably could have singed my eyebrows off, he asked, “Are you messing with me right now? You really think I’d be okay with you dating other dudes?”

  “I wasn’t talking about dating,” I said, inhaling deeply. “Just fucking.” I knew that would get him going.

  He jumped off the rock and grabbed by hand, giving me half a second to put my sandwich down or risk losing it on the ground. He hauled my body against his, gripping my ass with both hands as he kissed me hard.

  “I want you to be mine.”

  Those words made me tremble inside, but the feminist in me refused to acknowledge the thrill. “I’m my own person, Landon. Not your personal property. I’ll never belong to any man.” Liar. This man once owned your body, heart, and soul.

  He narrowed his eyes, obviously fighting back what he really wanted to say. “My girlfriend. My wife. My lover. My best friend. The mother of my children. Like it or not, you will be mine.”

  He made it impossible to argue when he put it like that. ‘Cause under all the tough talk I was a girly-girl who’d been dreaming about a big, white wedding since I was a five year-old with pig tails dressing up Barbie in a fancy wedding dress.

  “You’re getting way ahead of yourself,” I said, patting his chest. “You’ve somehow turned one crazy-hot night together into a future.”

  “You’re wrong.” He slipped his sunglasses up on his head and his expression was so sombre. “It was more than one night. It was two years of loving each other every day. It was fifteen years of missing you and being tormented by the memories. It was one night of proving to you that we still have that incredible connection.”

  I could barely breathe when his fingertips grazed my face, but I knew I had to slow this down before one or both of us got hurt. “I can’t tell you what you want to hear. It’s too soon. I’m still confused. I don’t know what I want or whether I can even trust you.” That wasn’t entirely true. I did know what I wanted, for the short term. Another night in his bed.

  “You don’t have to commit to anything right now. That’s not what I’m asking.” He curled his hands around my shoulders and bent his knees so we were eye level. “I’m asking for the exclusive right to kiss you, to hang out
with you like this.” His lips tipped up in a sexy half-smile. “The exclusive right to your orgasms.”

  That last one made me smile. “Sorry, no dice. I have a purple plastic friend named Peter in my nightstand drawer who isn’t ready to retire just yet.”

  His lips quirked before he said, “Fine, I’m willing to share you with Peter, but I can’t see you having much use for him with me around.”

  “But that’s just it,” I said, trying not to let the apprehension bleed into my voice. “You won’t be around for much longer, will you?”

  I could tell he was weighing his words carefully when he said, “Denver’s not far from here. You need me, you pick up the phone and I can be here within an hour and a half, tops. Or you can come to me.”

  “Your career isn’t conducive to a relationship,” I reminded him, like he didn’t already know that. Though the football season was short, he had training, endorsements, a million other responsibilities. “Which probably explains why you’re still single.”

  “You want to know why I’m still single.” He glanced out at the lake. “Because I wasn’t willing to settle. I knew what real love was. I’d found it with you, and I was determined to find it again.”

  “So, why couldn’t you?”

  “Maybe it’s like my mama told me. There’s one person out there for everyone. Your soul mate.”

  “You really believe that?” I asked, wondering if I did too. “That I’m the only person who could ever make you happy?”

  “All I know is you’re the only person who ever has.” He leaned in for a quick kiss. “And being back here with you again feels so damn right. I don’t want to lose this feeling again, baby.”

  Chapter Nine

  Landon

  I’d had the best day with Olivia. I dropped her off at home late afternoon to shower and change, telling her I wanted to surprise her with a nice dinner. I’d made reservations at the best restaurant in town and we’d dined on filet mignon with crème brûlée for dessert. I wasn’t a big champagne drinker, but having her back in my life was reason enough to order a bottle of Dom.

  Now we were back at my hotel and I could tell she was excited but nervous about what it all meant. She wasn’t the only one. I was worse than a horny teenager hoping to get lucky on a first date.

  “I’ve had a nice day with you,” she said, pressing her palm to my chest as she walked me backward into the door.

  “Me too.” I swallowed as she ran her fingertips over my pecs, my abs, finally stalling at my belt buckle. I didn’t want the night to end, but after the way she’d bailed on me last night, I didn’t know what to expect when… or if we did the deed.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked, licking her lips. “You’re usually so cocky, so sure of yourself. The Landon I knew would have had his hands all over me by now.”

  “The Landon you knew was also the same dumbass who dumped you,” I said, curling my hands around her hips and dragging her against me. “Maybe I don’t want you to think I’m that guy anymore.” I was trying so hard to prove to her that I’d changed, that I’d do anything to make up for my mistakes, but I had no idea how she was thinking or what she was feeling.

  “I’m getting that message,” she said, linking her arms around my neck. “I’m liking the new you.”

  Like was a long way from love, but I’d take what I could get, for now. “Oh yeah?” It was time to lose the hesitancy and take what I wanted. I reached for the front zipper running the length of her black dress. It was short and tight with thin straps and her tits were practically spilling out of it, driving me out of my mind all night. “Easy access,” I said, spreading the material wide. “I love that.” But I loved what lay beneath even more. A royal blue strapless bra and matching thong with black lace trim. I’d been hard before seeing her like that, but I could pound nails now.

  “Glad you approve,” she said, biting her lip as she watched me slip the dress over her shoulders. “I wore it with this in mind.”

  “Really?” My dick was throbbing along with my heart, making me sweat. “You thought about me taking it off you?”

  She backed away slowly, taking the dress with her. She was still wearing high, strappy black heels and the lacy undergarments, looking like a sexy cover model guys fantasized about when they were home alone.

  “Mm mmm,” she said, still walking backward. She dropped the dress on the chair and reached behind her, unclasping her bra.

  I wanted to grab her, to lick her and suck her and taste every inch of her. But I was enjoying her little striptease way too much to move.

  She raised an eyebrow, obviously impressed by my restraint as she hooked two thumbs in her panties and slid them down her toned thighs before kicking them off. Her hands glided over her body, caressing her breasts before trailing over her abdomen.

  I was holding my breath, waiting to see what she’d do next. Praying she’d make another one of my fantasies come true. She’d been a shy virgin our first time around, and even though we were together two years, she’d never really outgrown the shyness in the bedroom. But now she was confident and bold and sexy as hell. A woman not afraid to show me how she liked it.

  “You’re wearing too many clothes,” she said, sliding a finger between her legs. “Makes it hard to see,” she said, eyeing the bulge in my pants. “The effect I’m having on you.”

  I slowly slipped off my blazer, followed by my white dress shirt, dropping both on the floor as my eyes remained fixed on her. She was teasing me, teasing herself, as one hand circled her nipple while the other traced her bikini line with her fingertip.

  I unfastened my belt and pants, kicking them aside impatiently as I toed off my shoes and bent to remove my socks. I was wearing only gray boxer briefs now, but she clearly wasn’t satisfied.

  “You tell me,” she whispered. “What you’d like to do to me and I’ll do it. But I want to watch you get harder while you do.” Her eye were at half-mast, her head tipped back to reveal the neck I was addicted to kissing. “I want to see that delicious drop of pre-cum and imagine licking it off.”

  She was driving me crazy and she knew it. I did as she asked, for the first time ever surrendering control to a woman who could break me with just a few words.

  “Tell me,” she whispered. “Tell me what you want me to do.”

  “Sit down in the chair.” My voice was raspy, my fists clenched at my sides and I knew it would take everything in me not to touch her while she got herself off.

  She tossed the clothes on to the foot of the nearby bed and sat down, looking prim and proper.

  I grinned, knowing how much she enjoyed toying with me. “Sit back. Get comfortable.” Not that I expected this to take long. “Hook your legs over the arm of the chair. Let me see you.” I groaned at the sight of her. Glistening. Pink. Begging to be licked.

  “Like this?” she asked, bracing her hands on her thighs.

  “Just like that.” I took a few steps closer, my eyes hungrily roaming every inch of her naked body. “Touch yourself.” I still stood a few feet away, her eyes never leaving mine as she followed my command. “Circle it. Faster. Just like I would.” I clenched my hands when she moaned and one hand strayed to her breast. “Harder. Pinch your nipple. Pull it. Tweak it.” Damn, I was going to come just watching her.

  “Landon…”

  I loved that she was touching herself and thinking about me. I wanted it to be like that every night we had to be apart. Her in her bed. Me in mine. Fantasizing about what it would be like when we were together again.

  “Two fingers,” I said, closing my eyes briefly because I needed to get a grip or risk losing it. When she obeyed me, I ordered, “Now three.” I was dying, watching her was the worst kind of pain and best kind of pleasure because I wanted it to be my hand, but watching her was like waking up from a wet dream only to realize it hadn’t been a dream.

  “This is… I’m…”

  I knew she was close and I wanted to take her over the edge so I could get mine. “Keep
doing what you’re doing.” I fisted my shaft, stunned at how hard she’d made me without even touching me. “But rub your clit at the same time. Harder. Faster.” I didn’t know who was more desperate. Her or me.

  “Screw it,” I said, dropping to my knees in front of her. “I can’t do it.” As much I loved the show she was putting on for me, I loved licking her more.

  She moaned, slipping her hands into my hair when I lapped at her, replacing her fingers with mine. She tasted amazing and I wanted to do this all night. To make her come over and over again. Until she was exhausted and satisfied. And mine.

  “Oh God, I’m gonna come.”

  Of course she was. She was so turned on her skin was on fire, her limbs trembling as she panted, bucking her hips as she gave herself to me. And I devoured like a man stranded in the wilderness. Dying for his next meal. Dying for her.

  “I can’t,” she whispered, pushing against my shoulder when I tried to push for another orgasm on the heels of her first.

  “Yes, you can,” I slipped my fingers out of her as my tongue lapped at her slowly. I let her come down before I hit the reset the button, eliciting a sob-cry from her that told me I was on the right track. I treated her to a slow, leisurely build, reminding her we had all night.

  “Oh. My.”

  I slipped digits in and out of her easily, fantasizing about all the ways she’d take me deep tonight. Getting her primed and ready for a night she wouldn’t forget.

  “Lan—”

  My name was lost in the intensity of her orgasm as her whole body rocked with satisfaction. I grabbed her hips, hauling her against me, refusing to let her go. I wanted to own her pleasure from here on out.

  “Un-fucking-believable.”

  I hauled her to her feet, unwilling to let her rest for even a second. I wanted to wear her out, to make her beg, scream, and cry for me. Then I wanted to remind her what it felt like to be treated like a queen. My queen.

  I kissed her, guiding her to the wall, where I intended to take her hard and fast because I knew I wouldn’t last long. Not after the way she’d turned me on. The blood was pumping through my veins, thick and hot, and I was already stiff and swollen with need.