by Shae Scott
******
I was pretty distracted when I arrived at William’s house later that night. I’d agreed to a late dinner, but after my talk with Granny I wished I could cancel. I wanted to be alone with all of the thoughts running through my head. I needed to make sense of it all or at least bury it deep inside where I didn’t have to think about him being in town or what it meant. Or why it felt like it had to mean anything.
He opened the door, smile large and arms open as he pulled me into a hug. “Hi there.” I let him hold me for a minute and it did help. It cut through the clutter and helped calm me.
“Hi. It smells good in here,” I said.
“Good. I hope you like it,” he smiled. He leaned in, kissing me softly before taking my hand and pulling me towards the kitchen. “I have wine for you if you’re interested.”
“I am always interested,” I admitted. He laughed and grabbed the bottle of wine and poured me a nice tall glass. He looked good. He wore faded jeans that hung low on his hips and a dark blue thermal shirt that clung to his muscles. Sometimes I got so caught up in my own thoughts that I forgot just how handsome he really was. He was a contradiction of sorts, lean and strong, dark and mysterious, but then he would smile or do something so sweet that it totally called into question the whole bad boy persona that you would assign him at first glance.
He caught me studying him and he raised an eyebrow. “What?” he questioned, leaning against the counter in front of me so he could see me better.
“Nothing. I was just admiring the view,” I admitted. That made him smile and I laughed. “Don’t let it go to your head, Romeo,” I teased.
“Hey, I’m not complaining, you can check out the goods all you want. If you’re nice I’ll even let you touch,” he said turning to head back to the stove. I didn’t miss the extra sway that he put into his hips. It made me laugh.
“Don’t hurt yourself over there,” I said, sipping my wine. It was delicious and it relaxed me further.
“Don’t you worry your pretty little head, kitty kat, I’ve got this covered.”
The sound of the familiar nickname hit and I instantly froze. Kitty kat. Kit Kat.
“Don’t call me that. I hate that name,” I blurted before I had a chance to stop myself. He turned to look at me, surprised by my outburst.
“What? Oh. Okay. Sorry. It just came out,” he said, brows furrowed as he took in the look of horror on my face. I knew I was being ridiculous, but my emotions were already tangled with the memory of Owen after seeing him yesterday and my talk with Granny earlier. It had left me feeling vulnerable.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you. I just hate that nickname.” I tried to laugh it off to ease the sudden tension in the air.
“Noted. I won’t use it again,” he smiled. He walked towards me and kissed my forehead and I let go of the breath I was holding. I was being an idiot. I took another sip of wine and forced myself to relax and shake it off.
William returned to the stove to tend to dinner. He threw me a look over his shoulder as if trying to decide if I was okay. I gave him a big smile to reassure him. No more outbursts. I refused to let Owen back in to ruin my progress. I wasn’t going to let my run-in with him mess with my head. I didn’t have to see him again. Nashville was a big city and I didn’t need coffee. It was bad for me anyway.
I let out a deep breath, releasing the sudden tension that had settled in my shoulders. William stole a glance at me and I gave him a smile. It must not have reached my eyes because he cocked his head to the side and then came over to me. He turned my stool so that he was standing directly in front of me, my knees on either side of his. “Let it go. It’s fine. Let’s just enjoy our night,” he said softly. His finger touched the bottom of my chin, lifting it up so I was looking up at him. “Yeah?” he asked.
“Yeah,” I smiled. For real this time. I took a moment to just study his face and as his hands ran down my arms before taking my hands into his. His touch soothed me and I soaked it in.
“Good.” He leaned in and kissed me softly, his lips brushing against my own in the most tender of ways. And it felt nice. This is what I needed.
5
Owen
It had been a long week so it felt good to go out and grab a drink. I lifted my hand and signaled to the bartender that I was ready for another beer. My buddy, Cooper, and I had been here for a couple hours already. I needed this night out and Coop was always up for anything. He was unattached and always ready for a party.
I’d met him at work and we’d gotten along instantly. A bromance, as Ally would have called it. He didn’t look like he belonged in the corporate world. His suit hid arms covered in tats. He was a good guy, a bit of a player, but I got it. He was me a year ago. He didn’t give me shit about only wanting to play wingman. I’d gotten wasted one night and spilled the whole story of me and Ally. He didn’t give me shit over that either which won him points with me. Honestly, it felt good to have it out there. I didn’t have to make excuses as to why I didn’t give the cute bartender, who had introduced herself as Sarah, a second glance even when she was doing her best to shove her tits in my face. Coop could have her.
I was halfway listening to Coop as he talked up a tiny blond on the stool beside him when I saw a ghost walk through the door. I did a quick mental calculation of how many beers I’d had. Three? No, four. Not enough to be seeing things. But there she was.
I watched as she stepped through the door. Her hair hung past her shoulders in soft, dark curls. I loved when she wore it curly. It was sexy as hell. Her dark jeans clung to her every curve and her black top hung off of one shoulder. My gaze locked in on that bare shoulder, teasing me, reminding me of how soft it was as I kissed my way across it. The memory made my cock twitch. I stood instinctively, needing to go to her, but I stopped short when I saw the man behind her. He was tall, buzzed hair, and a protective hand against the small of her back. I’m pretty sure a fucking semi hitting me full speed would have hurt less than this moment did. Who the fuck was this guy?
I fell back onto the stool and watched as they made their way to a table near the stage. They must be here for the band. Was that guy her boyfriend? I watched as he slid in first and then offered her his hand. She smiled down at him. A real fucking smile. For him. Fuck. I was frozen in place. It was like watching a car accident. I couldn’t turn around. I watched as the waitress walked up to their table to take their drink order. When she was gone asshole fuckface reached out and brushed the hair away from her face and kissed her cheek. My fists clenched. She was with him.
“Hey, man, you okay?” Cooper asked. I didn’t say anything, but he followed my gaze and then looked back at me. “Is that her?” he asked.
I managed a slight nod, my jaw clenched so tight that I couldn’t bite out words if I’d wanted. I didn’t trust myself anyway. I wanted to go punch him and grab her up and carry her out with me. Unreasonable? Yes. It didn’t matter. I didn’t want him anywhere near her.
Cooper slapped me on the back, forcing my stool around so that I was facing the bar again. He flagged down the bartender, “Two shots of Jack Daniels. Actually, just get me four. We’re gonna need to keep them coming,” he said.
The crowd started to cheer as the band made it to the stage. The room filled with the sounds of drums and bass, but it did nothing to drown out the visions that were suddenly assaulting me. When Sarah slid the shot glasses in front of us I downed both, one after the other. I caught her eye to let her know I was indeed going to need her to keep them coming.
“I’m guessing you don’t know who that guy is?” Coop asked.
“The asshole she’s fucking now? No, I don’t know. Fuck. I waited too long. I should have known she’d find somebody else. I was trying to give her some time so she wouldn’t hate me. Looks like she didn’t need time after all.” I was angry, not at her, but at myself for screwing up the best fucking thing I’d ever had. Not just once, but over and over. Did I really expect her to just sit around and wait for me
after what I’d done to her, after the horrible things that I had said to her? Part of me never expected her to believe them. How could she believe me when I said I hadn’t ever loved her? It had sounded so ludicrous when I said it, but obviously she had and now she was with this asshole and I was too late.
Fuck.
I downed another shot and finally, the numbness started to settle in. The music was loud and the crowd had filled in the empty space between me and her table. I couldn’t see her anymore. It was probably better that way.
“Dude, don’t think about it. I know it’s shit seeing her here with that guy, but it doesn’t mean you are out of the game. You said it yourself, you were shit to her, you can’t expect her to just fall down with her legs in the air when you show up, right?” Coop sure had a way with words.
“I can’t stand seeing her with him. It drives me fucking crazy,” I admitted. I could admit it now, the power that she had over me. It’s amazing what a little bit of perspective could do for a person.
I downed another shot, knowing I would be hitting the wall soon if I didn’t slow down. I was miserable. And there was nothing like miserable of your own making. Who was I kidding? I had been horrible to her, and she’d just kept believing in me when I was trying to sort out my shit. She was still there even with all of my back and forth. She’d believed in us, when I hadn’t. No, not us. I hadn’t believed in me. She had. She was the best fucking person I’d ever known. I knew I still didn’t deserve a second chance, but hell if I wasn’t going to take it if she ever offered it up again.
The band took a break and the space around me took on a white noise buzz that hung around me like a fog. Maybe it was the whiskey.
“Oh shit, they’re gonna do karaoke. This should be fun. I love listening to drunk assholes who think they are Garth Brooks,” Coop laughed.
I grunted in response.
“Wait…you’re a drunk asshole. Maybe you should serenade you’re girl. You know, a big romantic gesture. Chicks love that shit, don’t they?” Coop suggested laughing at his own joke.
I used to sing for Ally all the time. She’d always listened with her eyes closed like she was breathing in the music. She felt every note. I loved watching her that way. The memory had me considering the crazy. I had never sung in public, especially at some cheesy karaoke night, but maybe Cooper was right, maybe it would mean something to her if I did it. At least I would be in front of her. She wouldn’t be able to ignore me up there. I just needed the right song.
“Oh, shit…you’re gonna do it. I was kidding!” Coop said.
“Why not? I can sing,” I said simply.
“Fine. Do it. But you gotta pick something good. Something big. I don’t know, like…I will always love you.” He was goading me. It didn’t matter. I had made up my mind. I just needed a song. I needed to think.
“Dude, you sing that song and I will personally remove your balls for you.”
“Fuck you. I’m not singing that song. But I am going to sing,” I said, determined. I pushed back from the bar and strode up to the sign up table, filled out my slip and handed it over. This was such a great idea.
6
Ally
The bar was loud, but the band was great. William’s brother, Sam, was in the band so he’d wanted to come out and support him. I didn’t mind. I was feeling relaxed and the night out was a nice distraction. I sipped my beer and settled against William. I liked the way his hand rested on my leg, his finger drawing circles across the material.
“The guys sound really good tonight,” I said.
“Yeah. They’ve been practicing a lot lately. I think it’s really paying off,” he said. I smiled at the pride in his voice.
“Do you want to go back and say hi during the break?” I asked. The crowd was working through a line of karaoke talent right now. So far we’d heard some Celine Dion, some Queen, and some Reba McEntire. Most of them were decent, some of them pretty good.
“Nah, they’ll be back on in a few. We can see him after the set.”
I smiled up at him and he leaned in and kissed my forehead sweetly.
“Alright, we have time for one more before we bring back Dirt Road Addiction for the second set. Let’s give it up for Owen Brooks!” My head snapped up at the name. Everything moved in slow motion as I searched the crowd for the familiar face attached to that name. He couldn’t be here, I would have felt it. And he would never be doing karaoke. Still, my eyes scanned the crowd searching. My heart stumbled as I watched him take the stage. Shit. It was him. What was he doing? He never sang in public.
I looked closer and saw the tell tale signs that he had been drinking. A lot from the looks of it. But he still came across as cool and in control as he took the mic. I couldn’t take my eyes off him as he scanned the crowd. I sunk back into my seat as if that would hide me from view. I cursed William wanting to sit up front. I wanted to run.
It was no use. He knew exactly where I was. His eyes found me and locked in. I saw his lip lift in a ghost of a smile before he gave me a nod. I felt William’s hand on my thigh, it felt heavy. This was going to be bad. I could feel it.
Owen held my gaze as the first notes hit the air. My breath caught because I instantly knew the song. Blake Shelton. Mine Would Be You. Shit. I wanted to bolt, but the heavy hand against my leg held me in place. That and the intense look in Owen’s eyes as he directed every line my way. He made no secret that he was singing it to me, his voice, gravelly and smooth at the same time. He had such charisma on stage. It was something I’d always secretly wanted to see. Only I never expected it be like this. People were yelling for him, cheering him on, but I’m not sure he noticed any of it.
“Why is that guy staring at you?” I heard the familiar tone of William’s voice against my ear, but I didn’t respond. I couldn’t tear my gaze away from Owen. He was belting out each line and the words hit me square in the heart. It made me fidget in my seat. I was having trouble breathing properly. The whole scene was just too much to take.
The song ended and I watched as Owen returned the mic to the stand and stepped off of the stage, his signature cocky smirk in place as he finally acknowledged all of the cheers for his performance. I held my breath as I watched strangers clap him on the back and offer to buy him a beer. Silently I prayed, please, God, don’t let him come over.
Obviously, God had more important things to deal with than my mortification, because it was very clear that he was walking straight towards us. Maybe I should have told William more about my past. Now was not the time to be explaining it. I took a breath and forced myself to sit up taller, squaring my shoulders. I could handle this.
He stopped at the edge of the table, his eyes were dark and they held me still. I was aware of William’s hand, on my back now, as he possessively leaned into me. Apparently he was cluing in that this wasn’t just some random stranger.
“Hi,” Owen said, his voice strong and sexy as it slid over me, familiar.
“I didn’t realize that you were singing karaoke these days,” I said keeping my voice calm. I was working hard to fight the connection that I still felt between us. It seemed to charge the air.
“I don’t. This was the first time. I guess you could say that I was feeling…inspired," he smirked.
“I’m William.” The voice came from beside me and we both glanced over. William’s jaw was tense. He knew something was up and I had a feeling that all of the pieces were starting to fall into place.
“Nice to meet you.” Owen gave him a nod and then turned his attention back to me offering no introduction of his own. Still a jealous asshole. I felt William tense beside me. I wanted to rest my hand on his leg to reassure him, but I didn’t. I couldn’t. I couldn’t tear my unwilling focus from the man standing in front of me.
“So, how have you been?” he asked, hands stuffed in his pockets.
“Good.” I didn’t trust myself with words. I didn’t want to encourage him. I wanted him to leave so that I could breathe again.
“I didn’t catch your name.” That was William again. I needed this to be over. I thought back to the first date of mine that Owen had interrupted. I didn’t want a repeat of that. I heard the slight sigh of frustration that Owen released before tearing his eyes away from me to flick back to William.
“Owen. Ally and I go way back, don’t we Kit Kat?” he said. Then he had the nerve to wink at me.
I glared at him, letting him know that I didn’t appreciate the nickname. I felt Williams fingers dig into the skin at my back and I knew the use of the nickname hadn’t gone unnoticed by him either.
“Mind if I sit?” he asked, taking a seat before either of us could respond. I didn’t dare steal a glance at William. He was an easy going guy, but I could feel the tension rolling off of him. He didn’t know the details about Owen, but he could guess, and regardless, Owen seemed determined to lay it all out for him.
“We were actually about to leave,” I said. I was more than ready to get out of this bar and put some distance between me and my past. I wasn’t looking forward to the conversation that I’d have to have with William, but it was probably way overdue.
“You have a full drink, you can’t leave yet,” he smirked. Stupid smirk. I hated it. I picked up the glass of beer in front of me and downed it. Every single drop. I watched him over the glass, his eyes getting wider as I emptied it.
I slammed it back down on the table and met his eyes. “All done,” I clipped out. I wasn’t managing indifferent this go around, but he was probably too drunk to even remember this tomorrow.
Owen leaned back, crossing his arms across his chest. “Well, that wasn’t very lady like, but I’m sure Winston here will agree with me that it was kind of hot,” he chuckled at his own joke. I ignored him and his jab at William.
I turned to William then and gave him my best sugary sweet smile, “Ready to go home?” I asked. I saw Owen flinch at the word home. I’d used it on purpose. It irritated me that he was here and once again invading my space and the life I was rebuilding for myself. I didn’t need him here confusing me or making me go backwards.
