Alone With the Best Friend (Alone #1)

by Summer Wynter

  I try to act like it’s the most natural thing in the world. That I’m just sitting in the living room with my son and his friend, munching on some cheese and crackers and watching a movie together. I make sure to sit in the far chair, the one I hate and I only have for guests, so that no one sits beside me.

  I damn sure don’t steal glances at Ethan, but I can’t help but wonder what he’s thinking.

  Chapter Eight

  The sun has barely come up when I pull on a dressing gown and run a brush through my hair. I wrap up the wayward strands and pull it all back into a pony tail until I can at least get some coffee in me. One last look at the mirror to make sure I look presentable and I’m spinning toward the door. I tiptoe as quiet as I can be to the kitchen, hitting the auto-brew option on the coffee pot.

  Caffeine. All the caffeine in the world wasn’t going to erase yesterday. How I sat there on the sofa watching a movie I can’t even remember as I ached, sore and warm from Ethan’s cock.

  What the hell is wrong with me?

  Sure I can list all the pros to what happened; Ethan’s hot, we’ve a past we didn’t even realize we had, and….well did I mention he was hot? But there is one huge con, he’s my son’s best friend. How the hell am I supposed to deal with that? Oh, and the con isn’t the only thing that is huge, if you’re catching my drift.

  It had been years, practically a decade, since I had felt the passion I felt in that lustful encounter. While me and Russell had started out playful and passionate as teenagers sneaking our trysts, the later it got in the marriage the more sex was just an obligation. I’d been going through the motions for so long I had almost forgot what real lust felt like.

  ****

  “Yes, don’t worry Lila, I will be back on campus on time and will get Cole.” These words echo from his open door into mine. Ethan is clearly on the phone with someone. I’ve no idea who Lila is but have at least heard Cole’s name mentioned several times in conversations with Jack.

  We were having a banging time then needed to leave to pick up Cole.

  There’s no way we are going to have ‘too much fun’ Mom, we’re with Cole.

  No, Cole is here so we’re being quiet.

  I’d always thought that Cole was another man on campus that was very strict in his upbringing. Someone that kept the boys in line. But now….

  “Look, he’s my son as much as he is yours. I said I would be there and I will.” Louder now, and leaving nothing to the imagination.

  Cole was his son.

  Shit, shit, shit.

  ****

  I pull on a pair of black yoga pants and a white tee shirt, making sure that my phone is loaded with music and I have my ear phones. As soon as breakfast is made and on the table, I’m going to head out for a jog. Clear my head. Figure out some things.

  It hasn’t been long since the two of them arrived and already things are a huge mess. I’m not winning any Mother of the Year awards this year, that’s plain to see. And now in addition to me fucking my son’s best friend, I learn he’s a new dad.

  I need to process everything that is happening. That’s all I can think of as I get down the stairs and put on a pan of eggs and bacon for them. I hurry through in a daze, yell to them to come get something to eat and that I’ll be back soon, and then sprint out the front door leaving them to their own.

  ****

  As my feet make contact with the cool asphalt below them, I couldn’t believe I didn’t know about Cole. All those nights I called to hear Jack whisper into the phone that he can’t talk because Cole is sleeping. The days Ethan stayed out of class to take care of him. Cole wasn’t some man that kept the boys from having their fun, no, Cole was Ethan’s son.

  Ethan is someone’s father. My son’s best friend is a dad.

  I pick up the pace, turning down the corner near the park, I run further, faster than I have before. There’s a burn in my calves and my breath is coming quicker. Heart pounding, I’m nearly through the halfway point as I turn to head back to the house when I hear my phone alert me.

  Melody, have I done something? You left so abruptly.

  Done something? The memories of everything he’s done flood over me. I even add a few choice fantasies I’ve had that he hadn’t actually done in reality for good measure.

  I stop, hands on my knees as I breathe hard. Once my heart beat has started to regain normalcy, I begin to text him back.

  I’m fine, just clearing my head.

  It was true, and all he needed to know.

  So, is it what we’ve been doing or is it finding out I have a son?

  Cards on the table. I like that. How I wish he could be about twenty years older with that mind. And that body, I added.

  Both.

  No sense in lying to him. They are both hitting me hard, although I simply don’t know why Cole is bothering me. Perhaps it is as simple as the firm slap of knowing that I really don’t know anything at all about Ethan.

  I honestly thought you knew, from Jack. We were in the process of breaking up when Lila found out she was pregnant. We share as much of the parenting as we can, but we’ve not been together in a very long time.

  Bless him thinking that I’m jealous of Lila, of a past relationship. I smiled and ran my finger down the edge of the phone almost as if I were stroking the stubble-lined jaw line of his face.

  It’s not that. I just really know so very little about you. That truth hit me when I realized the Cole you guys speak of is your boy and not another classmate.

  We spent hours texting. From what it is like being a single parent to life’s unexpectedness, we covered a lot of ground. Both of us nestled in our own rooms, late at night, texting our whispers to each other. Finally I told him that I had appointments all day tomorrow and really needed to get to sleep. I didn’t want to, but knew I needed at least a little shut eye before the morning.

  Goodnight, Melody. I do want to get to know you better, not just physically. In fact, we can take that off the table for now if it’s easier.

  I pondered this before replying. Would it make it easier? Or would saying that we were not going to engage in our basic lust of one another make it even harder to deny? It was worth a try; good, bad, or indifferent.

  Ok, Ethan. Good night for now.

  Chapter Nine

  It seemed unfair to me that the weather was so calm. No wind, no torrential downpour, not even a solid moody drizzle. Instead I got brilliant sunshine, punctuated by the occasional puffy cloud. The direct opposite of the climate in my head, which throbbed with the angry thunderstorm of regret and confusion. This garden path in the park was so familiar to me that I could operate on autopilot, traversing the parking lot, the grassy hills, and by the time I reached the pond my head had calmed down, influenced as always by the peaceful setting.

  “If you don’t slow down soon I going to embarrass myself by running after you.” The familiar voice nearly caused me to trip. Not here, not in my peaceful place. What was he doing? Ethan must have gathered from my face that his presence wasn’t altogether welcome, but he didn’t let it deter him.

  “Beautiful spot, isn’t it?”

  “It is. One of my favorites.” My voice, while not welcoming, wasn’t cold either. It wasn’t Ethan’s fault I was so conflicted. Although, stealing a quick glance at how his shirt fitted over his muscular body, maybe it was.

  “I can see why.”

  We start to walk together; surprisingly our paces synced up effortlessly. The silence was easy and comfortable, which is why perhaps I felt able to speak about the topic on both our minds.

  “I took the job when Jack got in school. It seemed like the only way to make things work.” Ethan walked along, the silence still comfortable and lacking in judgment. “I though I’d hate it. That it would be my most shameful secret. The thing is after being a mom, and only a mom for so long, being wanted as a woman, for myself, it was addictive. I couldn’t get enough.” No longer able to look at him I studiously stared at the ducks in the pon
d.

  “I wonder if you can fish in that pond?”

  I stared at Ethan’s sudden non sequitur. “I think so. I’ve seen little boys with rods sometimes.”

  “I used to love to fish. My mom taught me how when I was about 8.” If Ethan was shocked by my work reflections he didn’t show it. From the expression on his face I could have been chatting about the weather.

  “You usually picture a Dad fishing with his son.” I was trying to keep up with the conversation, but I had no idea where it was going.

  “Yeah, my Dad wasn’t interested. By the time he got home for from work he was too tired to do much. It was my Mom who took me every Wednesday after school. I remember being proud you know, that she made something I wanted a priority in her life.” Ethan dropped onto the bench overlooking the pond, and patted beside him so that I would do the same. “It’s funny though, only now looking back on it that I can see that she enjoyed it as much as I did. She was having so much fun, which made it impossible for me not too. I hope I’m a parent like that to my kids.” A baby started crying by the water causing all the ducks to fly off at once, “A parent like you are to Jack.”

  “I don’t know how good of a parent I’ve been lately. I think sleeping with your son’s best friend is frowned on.” The sheer outlandishness of that sentence made me laugh.

  He reached over and grabbed my hands, clenched tightly in my lap, taking one in his. “I don’t think it really matters at all.” The comfortable silence returned, then the two of us just sat, sitting in the sun, enjoying the park.

  Chapter Ten

  Are you asleep?

  The text hits my phone with a muted ding alert. For a moment, I almost don’t know who sent it, as I’ve not programmed his number in as a contact. The realization brings a smile to my lips before I can even tell myself to stop.

  Not really, Ethan, what’s up?

  I expect a quick ‘ding’ of the phone, but wait on eggshells for nearly two minutes before the reply comes.

  Couldn’t sleep. Know we said we should slow things down, but I can’t stop thinking about you.

  And what are you thinking?

  The first time I logged in and chose your webcam. How sexy you looked, and nervous. Know what?

  What?

  After that night, I never looked at another webcam girl. Only you, Melody. Hell, I’ve not even dated anyone since Lila. You’ve been enough for me, even before you were next to me in the flesh.

  This revelation I’m not quite prepared for. I’ve been trying my best to think of what we are doing as being just hormonal. Two people who just need to burn through the energy. Nothing more, nothing less.

  Melody?

  This time the chime startles me from my thoughts.

  Yes, Ethan?

  We could cam. In our own rooms. It’d be like it was before, except maybe I could turn on mine on this time?

  I ponder this. I’m trying to split hairs on whether this goes against everything I said or if it is a perfect loophole to still get what we each want.

  Ok, Ethan. Give me five minutes.

  Ten minutes pass and I’ve changed from the ratty tee shirt I typically sleep in to something more cam-appropriate. The lace hugs me tight in all the right places and pushes up my ample chest. I give myself a quick once over in the mirror, adjust everything once more, and make sure my lipstick is perfectly lined. I inhale, trying to tell myself that this is just like every other night. The light comes on and I let whoever has enough spare dollars watch me at my most vulnerable; when I’m in the middle of touching myself the way I need to be touched.

  But it’s different this time and my body knows it. This time there is no crowd of faceless men and women viewing. This time there is only one person, and he has a face, a gorgeous delicious face. Everything is changed.

  Showtime.

  I log in and set the room immediately for invite-only, sending that sole invite to Battleship8. I don’t need a flurry of regulars to try and pop in. In the moments that I wait for him to log in, I know that this is skirting that fine line. It is a slippery slope back down the rabbit hole where we both were before our heart to heart talk.

  For a second, I’m tempted to shut it all down and stick to my guns, but there is a wanton need to be with him. Any way, shape, or form. If I can’t have him writhing underneath my fingertips, I want to at least see him.

  The computer dings its alert letting me know he is in the room. I slowly turn on the cam. For the first time since I started doing this, another cam screen is in my view. He’s still in the same attire as he was in this evening when he went to his room after dinner. The same skin hugging jeans that looked melted onto his buff body.

  I remember his hands on my naked flesh and the way chills rocked me to my core. I remember every line of text he sent me over the months that we cammed without knowing each other. A surge of heat rushes right through me and for a moment I think I’m moaning in anticipation when I then remember Jack and all the awkward years when he had so much trouble making friends. How it would crush him to lose Ethan.

  I inhale sharply and click the computer off. It feels like I’m walking through deep mud as I make my way to my private bath to scrub the makeup from my face and to slip out of the lingerie and into my sleep tee and panties.

  I may have never before felt what I feel when I’m with Ethan, but I’m not about to put my needs above my son’s happiness. Not now, not ever. Not even for the best sex of my life.

  Chapter Eleven

  “Come on – it’s almost on.” Wednesday night reality TV had become a guilty ritual for Jack and I during the past summer. Between school and work commitments it was the only night we were both reliably home and we had developed a fascination for watching the reality TV stars air their dirty laundry.

  “Just getting the popcorn.” Jack, comfortably clad in a track suit handed the bowl to me and proceeded to lay on the rug in front of me. It still sometimes baffled me that the baby I had brought home from the hospital had turned into this lanky man.

  “So who do you think is going to throw the first glass of wine tonight?” He asked, stealing a pillow from the couch.

  “Linda for sure. She’s a powder keg after last week’s big reveal.” Dressed for comfort as well in my yoga pants and tank top, I reached for my glass of wine on the coffee table.

  “I may have two glasses tonight. My wild night.” I said laughing at myself.

  “When is the last time you went out, Mom?” Jack asked me, suddenly serious.

  “Oh, I don’t know. When were acid washed jeans fashionable?” I joked. “I don’t need to got out Jack. I love these summer nights in.” I was nervous a little now, trying not to show it. Where was this coming from? Surely Ethan wouldn’t have said anything. Would he?

  “I know it’s hard to live up to watching spoiled rich people with your son, but sometime I worry that you don’t have many friends of your own. After Dad left you devoted all your time to making sure I was okay and it didn’t leave much time for doing things for you.” Watching me now, instead of the weeping aging starlet on the screen, Jack looked older than his years.

  “Taking care of you was what I wanted to do Jack. You are the most important thing in my life.” I couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that it looked like my little boy was worried about me. “Where is this coming from? Are you nervous about the Advanced Placement classes? You know how proud I am of you for getting into that school, don’t you?”

  “A little nervous maybe. It’s going to be so different from anything I’ve done before. You’ve sacrificed so much Mom, I’d hate to let you down.” Suddenly he looked his age again, a boy afraid of disappointing his mother.

  “Kid of mine, listen to me closely. You could never let me down. You are kind and smart and loving are just the best present that I ever got. No matter what happens I will always be so proud of you.” Growing a little misty I got up to get the tissue box, subtly leaving it next to Jack, who was looking a little emotional hims
elf.

  “Thanks, Mom. I guess I also hate the thought of you being alone.” He quickly wiped at his face with a tissue and returned his attention to the TV.

  “I have to live my own life Jack, and that’s not something that should worry you. You know I worry sometimes about letting you down too.” Shocked, Jack shifted his attention to back to his Mom.

  “You could never let me down. You’re my mom!” The insanity of the statement made him laugh. As if the women who had been his rock all his life could let him down. He pulled me down for a hug, making me scream and laugh when the popcorn went flying across the room.

  Ethan passed us at this moment, having just finished his shower and looking for some clean sweats. The playfulness of the two of us and the obvious enjoyment we shared made his stomach flip. Jack was his best friend; he loved him like a brother and never wanted to do anything to hurt him. That was going to be hard though because he loved me too, and most certainly not in a brotherly way. He was going to have the deal with the fact that he was in love with his best friend’s mom.

  Chapter Twelve

  Three weeks before Summer break ends…

  “Hey you two, I’m going to pop out to the store real quick. You guys want anything?”

  “No, honey, I’m good. Thank you, though,” I answered him, moments before hearing the door shut behind him.

  The silence that fell upon us when Jack left was sudden and uncomfortable. Since trying to stay apart, it had only succeeded in drawing us closer together. Perhaps not physically, but definitely emotionally. We’d shared many conversations getting to know each other for who we were. I uneasily found some laundry to fold, desperate to have something to occupy my hands and tried to break the mood with chatter.

  “I’m guessing you’ve done nothing to get ready for the new college year? I’ve been on Jack for days to start getting organized, maybe start packing some clothes, but every time I look in his room, every article of clothing that boy owns is either on the chair or on the floor. I imagine he plans on scooping it into a garbage bag last minute.”