As I tried to catch my breath I whispered, “You"ll be waiting for me when I get back?”
He grinned and nodded. “Right where you left me. Just let me know when you"re on your way, okay?”
“I will,” I said. “I love you so much.”
“And I love you,” he said. I winced as I turned and walked into the courtyard.
“Are we flying again?” I said to Carlos. He nodded and held his hand out to me.
As we rose above the courtyard, he said, “Keep an eye out again, if we"re followed we"re done.”
“I will,” I said. He pulled me close again as we approached a small stone church on a hill above a tiny, mostly deserted, village. released me quickly this time. Landing softly, he And I never in a million years would have admitted that I was disappointed by that, but I was. I followed him up the steps and we walked inside.
“Señor Carlos,” the priest inside said as he rushed forward to meet us, “so nice to see you again… ahhh, and who is the muy bonita with you?”
“This is my… friend… Sarah,” said Carlos.
“Very nice to meet you SeñoritaSarah,” he said as he shook my hand.
“Very nice to meet you too,” I said.
“Monsignor, has the basement been prepared?” Carlos asked.
“Sí, Sí,” the priest replied. “It is cleared and readyfor you, please go right on down.”
“Gracias Monsignor,” Carlos said as he pressed a roll of cash into the priest"s hand.
We headed through the chapel to the hall and down the stairs to the basement. As soon as we were inside, I closed and locked the door.
“Okay,” Carlos grumbled, “how the hell do you want to do this?”
I crossed my arms over my chest and stared at him.
“What?” he said.
“You want to get it out?” I said.
“Get what out?” he said.
“Whatever is chapping your ass,” I said. “Because I can"t work with you like this.”
“Ahhh come on Sarah,” he groaned, “what more do you want from me? I"ve never done this before. I"ve never felt this way about anyone. I"m lost. I"m drowning. But I"m trying.” He sank down to the floor with his head in his hands. I went to him, pulling his hands away from his face.
“Carlos, you"ll get through this, we will get through this, and we"ll be better friends on the other side, I promise you,” I said.
He glared at me with fury, hunger and longing in his eyes. “How can you possibly know that?” he growled. “I am barely in control here and I hate that. This is tearing me apart, Sarah, and you don"t even give a shit.” He squeezed his eyes shut, instantly regretting his words, but it was too late.
“I don"t give a shit?” I yelled. “I don"t give a shit? How dare you, you son of a bitch. This is tearing me up just as much as it is you, and you know that. I"m a married woman. And I love my husband so much. Yet here I am wanting another man. Sex with Matt couldn"t be any better, yet here I am wanting desperately to sleep with you. This is killing me, Carlos, but I don"t get to go to my room at night and break down like you do. At least you get that. I don"t get to break down, ever.”
“Break down!” he yelled. “Screw you, Sarah. I"m breaking down because I know you"re in there screwing him all night. And the guilt I feel for wishing it was me is unbearable. He"s my best friend, Sarah. What kind of man am I for letting this happen?”
I decided I had to try a different tactic. One that I knew wasn"t true, but I wanted to try to make him believe that it was– it would be easier on both of us if he did.
“Carlos,” I said, “it"s not me that you want.”
I had no time to react to his fury. He growled and pounced on me, pressing his body down hard onto mine. I felt every muscle. I felt every bulge. I felt everything– and, God help me, I liked it. “Does this feel like someone who doesn"t want you?” he growled. “I"m stronger than you, maybe I"ll just take what I want right now.”
He squeezed his eyes shut and started to bring his mouth down to mine, but he stopped when he heard me whisper, “You could, Carlos, but you won"t. You won"t because I"d never forgive you if you did. I"d hate you. And you"d never forgive yourself. So you could, but you won"t. Because you love me. And I love you.”
Then I watched as the fury on his face slowly changed to overwhelming pain.
“Of course I won"t,” he groaned as he rolled off of me and onto his back. “I could never hurt you like that. But, God, Sarah, this hurts so much. It hurts so much to stop and it hurts so much to fight it.”
“I know it does, believe me, I know. I had never felt such a strong attraction to someone until I met Matt. That was amazing. It was overwhelming. But this? This is so much stronger. This is so strong that I don"t know how I"m going to keep resisting you. Right now, I want you more than I"ve ever wanted anybody or anything in my life. But it"s wrong, Carlos,” I said as I rolled next to him and rested my head on his shoulder and draped my arm across his stomach. “We can"t do this. And you need to trust me, though, when I tell you it"s not me you want. Not really. You just want something that you can"t have. I know it doesn"t feel like that right now, but someday I"ll show you. As soon as all this fighting is over, I promise I"ll help you see what"s truly in your heart.”
“What if you"re wrong though?” he whispered. “What if you"re wrong and it is you I want?”
Dear God, don"t make me think about that. Not now. Not yet, I thought. Of course I was wrong, I knew that. But I had to do everything I could to make this right, including convincing Carlos of something that I knew in my heart wasn"t true.
“I don"t know,” I said. “I guess we"ll cross that bridge if we come to it. But we"ll have to cross it without ruining anything and without anyone getting hurt. Who knows, we figured out how to make a vampire, maybe we can figure out how to clone me.”
He stared at me for a minute. “Thanks,” he whispered as he reached over and cupped his hand on my cheek.
“For what?” I said.
“For being the strong one,” he said.
I pulled his hand down to my mouth and kissed his palm. “You"re the strong one.” I said. “You just don"t know it yet.”
I sat up and smacked him on the stomach. “Ready to work now?” I said.
He nodded and jumped up. “You bet. Direct me, oh Great Director,” he grinned.
I smiled at the brief glimpse of the old Carlos. “Dork,” I said laughing as I pointed around the room, “we need to think of the room as a clock. 12 o"clock is always the wall behind me, the wall with the big table that we all sit at. Whether you"re facing it or have your back to it that is always 12 o"clock. The opposite wall is always 6 o"clock, over here is 3 o"clock, there is 9 o"clock, 1, 2, 4, 5, 7, 8, 10 and 11. Got it?”
“Got it,” he said.
“Good, okay, now when I say Carlos – 1, where are you going to punch?”
“Uh, here,” he said as his hand swung around.
“Right, but you"re going to have to react much faster. Ready?” I said and he nodded.
“12, 4, 7, 3, 2,” I said, watching him. “Better, but let"s go faster.”
We spent the next hour like that, until his reactions happened in the blink of an eye.
“Okay,” I said, “now, turn around.”
“Turn around?” he groaned.
“You have to be able to do this from every direction, Carlos, you know that,” I said.
“Yeah, yeah,” he said, “just give me a second to think.”
I did just that, giving him one second. “2, 7, 8, 6, 11,” I said. “Not bad, let"s go again. 3, 7, 9, 10, 1.” On and on, over and over we went, until he could react instantly no matter which direction he was facing. We concentrated hard, making sure we got it right. But we also laughed hysterically when he messed up.
“Just learning how to walk?” I laughed when he was so far off he was going in the opposite directions from where he was supposed to be.
“Don"t laugh at me, Sarah. You"ll damage my fra
gile ego.”
“Fragile ego? Hah! Your ego is so huge it could use getting knocked down a notch or two,” I teased.
He dashed over and wrapped me in an innocent, playful hug. “Is somebody on a serious power trip? I"m thinking you"re in need of a beat down,” he joked. He squeezed me tighter and pretended to smack me. I laughed and tried to squirm out of his arms. Suddenly I shifted and his hand was across my chest. My heart sputtered and this was no longer playful rough-housing between friends. This was foreplay. And I didn"t want it to stop.
“Carlos,” I whispered.
“I know, Sarah. I know,” he whispered as his hand slowly pulled across my breasts and went back to his side. He looked at me with so much sadness and longing that I had to look away. “I can"t, Carlos. I"m sorry, but I just can"t.”
“It"s okay, Sarah. I don"t want you to. Well, I do, but I don"t,” he said.
I turned back to him. “Back to work?” I said.
He nodded. “Yep, back to work.”
And work we did, for another few hours. We buried ourselves in it so deep that I lost track of time. Eventually, he sank down to the floor. “I"m exhausted Sarah,” he said.
“Okay, we"ll stop,” I said then I gasped when I looked at the clock. “Is that clock right?”
“I don"t know, why?” he mumbled.
“Because it says it"s midnight,” I said. “Are you too tired to fly?”
“Not if you try to help a little, can you?” he said.
I nodded. “I"ll try, but I haven"t had any practice since that first day.”
“That"s okay. You"ll do fine,” he said and he stuck his hand out to me. “Help me up?”
I walked over and pulled him up, wrapping my arm around his waist and putting his arm across my shoulders. As we walked toward the door, I reached out to Matt. ‘I’m so sorry. We lost track of time. We’re on our way home, I think. He’s pretty worn out though,’ I thought
‘It’s okay my sweet. Do you need my help getting him home?’ he thought.
‘I don’t think so, but we’re not in the air yet. If he can’t fly, I’ll let you know, okay?’ I thought
‘Okay, I love you,’ he thought. ‘Let me know when you’re in the courtyard, and heat up dinner for us and bring it to the room, okay?’
‘Okay,’ I thought. ‘I love you too.’ I opened the basement door and got him up the stairs, through the chapel and outside. The fresh air helped revive him a bit. He stood facing me and put his arms around my waist and mine were clamped around his.
“Okay,” he said, “you first. Close your eyes. When I feel you rise, I will too, okay?” I nodded and closed my eyes,„lighter than air" I recited in my mind „lighter than air." I felt my hair move in the breeze and opened my eyes. We were above the trees and moving toward home. Suddenly I felt Carlos start to slip through my arms.
“Carlos!” I yelled.
“Huh? What?” he mumbled. “Oh, sorry.”
“Look,” I said, “I don"t want you to fall, because I"m not sure I could move fast enough to catch you. Can you climb around onto my back?”
“Yeah, I think so,” he mumbled.
“Carefully,” I said as he began sliding around. I gripped his arm as long as I could then I relaxed when I felt his weight on my back. I clamped my hands together under his legs and leaned forward, smiling when he began snoring after his head slumped down on my shoulder. “Okay,” I said, “now comes the tough part.” How, I thought, am I supposed to link with Matt and stay airborne? I needed to contact him because I had no clue how to land without tumbling head over heels. Landing alone was tough, landing with someone on your back? No way. I took a deep breath. ‘Lighter than air, lighter than air, Matt? lighter than air,’ I thought.
‘Uh, honey?’ he thought.
‘Sorry, lighter than air, new at this, lighter than air, could use your help, lighter than air, with the landing, lighter than air, k?’ I thought.
‘You’re flying? On your own?’ he thought. ‘On my way.’
I could see the lights from the courtyard about a mile ahead – and I could also see that I was no longer high enough to clear the wall. “Uh oh” I said. I leaned back a little, slowing us, and tried to climb, but the wall just kept coming. Suddenly a flash of white came streaking towards me. I smiled as Matt"s arms wrapped around me and he lifted us up and over the wall, landing us softly on the other side with his forehead pressed against mine and Carlos sleeping soundly on my back. I raised my eyebrow. “Um, honey? Why are you wet and only wearing your boxers?”
“Huh? Oh,” he grinned, “well, I was waiting for you in the shower like you wanted me to and this was all I had time to grab.”
“Nice,” I said and I leaned in to kiss him. He pulled me tight at first, kissing me hard, then he quickly moved back a step.
“Oh no,” he said, “you are not doing that to me two nights in a row. These boxers are too flimsy.” I smiled at him. “Chicken,” I said.
“You bet,” he said then he nodded at Carlos. “You want me to take him?”
I looked over my shoulder at Carlos. “No, I"m okay. I"ll take him to his room. Grab dinner for us on your way back to the shower,” I said then I kissed him on the cheek and hurried inside. He ran past me a second later and into the kitchen. I walked past our room to Carlos" door and stopped when I saw Tracy sitting outside his door. “I"m so sorry Tracy. Someone should have called you. Obviously he"s way too exhausted tonight.”
“That"s okay, I understand,” Tracy said, but I could see the disappointment in her eyes as she turned to go.
“Hey Tracy,” I said, and she turned around,“are you busy tomorrow morning?”
“No,” she said as she checked her Blackberry, “nothing until the afternoon, why?”
“Why don"t you come back in the morning, say nine o"clock? I"m sure he"ll be awake by then. Tell him I said he doesn"t have to work until noon, okay?” I said.
“Sure thing, Sarah,” she grinned as she headed down the hall.
I held him with one hand as I quickly opened his door then walked gently into his bedroom. I turned around and sat us both down on the bed, then quickly flipped around and caught him before he fell. I laid his head on his pillow and gently covered him up. I sat next to him for a second, caressing his forehead. “We"re gonna be just fine, hun,” I whispered then I leaned down and kissed his forehead. As I turned to go, he grabbed my wrist.
“We might be fine,” he mumbled, “but your flying skills suck.” As he started snoring again, I gently pried my wrist away and walked into the hall, laughing and shaking my head.
I felt my heartbeat quicken as I walked toward our room, I could hear the shower running. I pulled off my clothes before I had even reached the bedroom, tonight he didn"t get to make me stay in them. I quietly hoped he"d have something else up his sleeve to tantalize me tonight. I climbed into the shower and wrapped my arms around him. “Where"s dinner?” I asked as I looked around for the pints.
He pushed away from me, grinned and held his arms out. “Right here, baby,” he said.
I looked around him. “Right where?” I said then my eyes flew open as it hit me – he drank it all and wanted me to share. In an instant I was totally aroused. I moved to spring at him but he put his hands out to stop me.
“Uh uh,” he said, “you don"t get to just have it. You"re gonna have to pin me and take it.”
“Oh my God,” I moaned, thinking how much I definitely liked this new trick he had up his sleeve. It took me fifteen minutes to pin him– and I didn"t let him up the rest of the night.
Chapter Twelve
“I hate Malina,” I grumbled as I rolled out of bed at just before noon.
“Don"t we all?” Matt mumbled.
“Yeah, but I hate her more, because I would love to spend all of my time in your arms, but right now I can"t because of her,” I said.
“I could come with you,” Matt said. I turned and stared at him for a second. “I know,” he said. “No I can"t.”
; “I wish you could. Really I do,” I whispered. Suddenly a voice came from the living room.
“Up and at „em,” Carlos called. “I"m coming in.” I quickly grabbed my robe and threw it on.
“Morning, who"s hungry?” he said as he held up four pints, grinning ear-to-ear. I took two and handed two to Matt.
“Well, somebody"s in a good mood,” Matt said.
“Yep,” he grinned, “thanks to your wife.”
Matt"s eyebrow went up as he turned to look at me. “Really? Honey, I don"t remember you leaving earlier,” he grinned.
“Ha ha,” I said.
Carlos" face fell and he blushed. “What? No, not like that,” he said, backtracking. “She asked Tracy to give me a wakeupcall this morning.”
I squeezed my eyes shut as I hoped that Matt didn"t notice the completely un-Carlos-like un-funny response.
“Are you ready, Sarah?” Carlos said, trying to change the subject.
“Give me a second,” I called over my shoulder. “Is everyone out in the courtyard?”
“They should be,” he said.
“Good,” I said as I walked out of the bathroom, dressed and ready to go. I walked around to Matt"s side of the bed and bent down to give him a quick kiss. Apparently quick wasn"t where he was at though, as his hands slid to either side of my face and he took my breath away with a kiss filled with so much love, passion and tenderness that I was overwhelmed and totally speechless when he finally stopped. I opened my mouth to try to say something at least three times.
Finally, from behind me, Carlos said, “Dude, she totally loves you.” I managed to smile and nod my head.
Matt smiled at me. “I love you too,” he said. “I"ll miss you every second until you"re home and in my arms again.” Holy shit, I thought, does he ever want me to be able to speak again? Once again I opened my mouth to try to say something, but he put his fingers on my lips. “Not now,” he whispered. “Tell me tonight.” I managed to nod again then I climbed off the bed. I slowly walked out into the hall ahead of Carlos, and, completely oblivious to where I was or even who I was, I turned the wrong way in the hall.
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