Lessons Learned

by Sandrine Gasq-Dion

  “Well, you’re a big guy,” Jude grinned. Jude put the bowl down and turned to face Hayden. “Look, about what I said before — ”

  “You don’t have to say anything, Jude.” Hayden shoved a forkful of food in his mouth.

  “Yeah, I do. It was hurtful and I didn’t mean it. I’m sorry, okay? You actually sounded awesome. Ross is a lucky guy.” Jude turned his attention back to his bowl. If Carson was being truthful, he was about to find out for sure.

  “I’m not with Ross, Jude,” Hayden said quietly.

  “You’re not?” Jude looked up, and his eyes locked with Hayden’s.

  “No, I’m not. I’m not with anyone at the moment.”

  “Oh, okay.” Jude dipped his head to hide the smile he knew he was wearing.

  “What about you? Find that special someone yet?”

  “I’m not dating at the moment.” Jude glanced over at Hayden. He looked so good in the light of the fire.

  Hayden stood up and looked out over the terrain. “I’m going to grab some more firewood. Think you can set up our little house?”

  “Sure.” Jude motioned to his bowl. “Thanks for dinner.”

  “No problem; if you’re still hungry, there are more of them in my pack.”

  “Okay.” Jude watched Hayden’s ass as he walked down the side of the hill. Damn, it was nice. Jude chuckled to himself and ate the rest of his stew as he eyed the surrounding area. Miles of forest spread out in front of them, and they had a lot more to cover the next day.

  After cleaning up, Jude went inside the small cave and set up their makeshift beds. There was barely enough room for both of them to stand up, but they would be fine lying down. Jude’s skin tingled at the thought of being that close to Hayden.

  Okay, so Hayden was gorgeous; he could at least admit that. He’d always thought Hayden was beautiful, even when he was shoving him into a locker. Jude sighed and ran a hand through his hair. Hayden had changed; he was no longer Cox the cock.

  “Hey, you okay?”

  Jude spun around and smacked his head on the rock wall.

  “Ow.”

  “Sorry,” Hayden chuckled. “Didn’t mean to spook you.” Hayden crossed the small space in one stride and lifted his hand to Jude’s temple. Jude shrank back from him and Hayden dropped his hand.

  “I’m sorry. I’m not going to hurt you.”

  Jude saw the look of sadness in Hayden’s eyes and took his hand. “No, I’m sorry. I guess part of me will always see you as the Hayden who bullied me, and I have to get past that. You’re not that kid anymore.”

  Hayden lifted his hand again and Jude leaned into his palm. Soft, warm, velvet skin caressed his hand and Hayden closed his eyes. He’d always wanted to touch Jude in this way.

  “It’s just as soft as I thought it would be,” Hayden whispered.

  “You’ve thought about me?” Jude’s eyes closed as Hayden’s thumb caressed his cheekbone.

  “Every day and night since I was thirteen, Jude. There’s so much I need to say to you — ”

  “When you tried to kiss me — it wasn’t you making fun of me, was it?”

  Hayden leaned in closer. Jude’s eyes opened and Hayden gently ran his fingertip across his bottom lip.

  “No.” Hayden leaned in further, a breath from kissing Jude. He could almost taste him. A loud noise out front startled him and he jerked away from Jude’s mouth. Hayden put a finger over his lips and motioned out front. Both of them stuck their heads outside and a startled deer looked up. Jude eyed the deer, and then looked over at Hayden.

  “We could eat it,” Jude smiled wide.

  “We’d have to eat the whole thing. I’m not carrying that around tomorrow.” Hayden sighed as his stomach ached from dinner. “I don’t have room.”

  The deer, realizing it was being assessed for dinner, took off. Jude laughed and went back inside. He took the bed in the back and curled up on his side. The temperature was about forty degrees.

  “Should we shift? I think we’ll be warmer.”

  Hayden took his shirt off. “Yes, we should. It’s going to get a hell of a lot colder.” Hayden stopped at the top of his sweatpants. “Jude?”

  “Yeah?” Jude stayed under the blanket as he removed his own pants.

  “If we hadn’t gotten interrupted, were you going to let me to kiss you?”

  “Maybe,” Jude grinned. “Maybe not.”

  Hayden scowled. “Tease.”

  “Ass.”

  “Goodnight, Jude.” Hayden shifted, and then padded over to the corner. Jude lifted the blanket and Hayden got under. Jude shifted seconds later and snuggled into his back.

  “Night, Hayden.”

  ~*~

  The morning sun passed across the mouth of the cave and Hayden stretched his back legs out. Jude was pressed into his backside like glue. Hayden rolled his head back and took in the sleeping face of Jude. Even as a wolf he was beautiful. Hayden panted softly and pushed his muzzle against Jude’s jaw. They moved closer to each other and Hayden rubbed Jude with his scent. Thank God Jude was in wolf form because Hayden was sure he’d get slapped otherwise. As it was, Jude growled softly at him.

  Hayden got up and made his way to the opening and peered out. It was overcast and cold.

  “How much time do I have to eat?” Jude stretched out his back and legs.

  “I’ll get it started.” Hayden shifted and immediately covered his dick. “Damn it’s cold!”

  Jude huffed, eyeing Hayden’s shriveled dick. “It sure is.”

  Hayden cocked an eyebrow. “Very funny. Let’s get a move on.”

  Running next to Hayden, Jude couldn’t help but notice their size difference. Even though he was almost six feet tall in werewolf form, Hayden was six foot five in human form, bigger as a wolf. He was massive. His coat was a beautiful, blondish-white color. Jude almost tripped twice during the run because he couldn’t stop staring. Thank God Hayden hadn’t been paying attention. How embarrassing.

  They’d been running for a good five hours before Jude saw something glinting in the distance. He snorted, signaling Hayden. They changed course and headed for the light in the distance. The sound of the river could be heard as they neared the end of the enclosure.

  The fence that ran between the enclosure and the other side was over twenty feet high. The wolves in the enclosure had been fitted with tracking devices that served another purpose as well. As soon as the wolves got five hundred feet outside of the fence, the device went off, causing them an enormous amount of pain. It didn’t stop until they were back in the enclosure.

  As they got closer, Jude recognized the remains of a plane. It was half of a plane actually, the cockpit and two rows back. Jude looked around the area for the other half but didn’t see it.

  He and Hayden circled the plane. The cockpit windows were covered with dirt and God knows what else, and something inside was blocking their view as well. Jude sniffed and looked over at Hayden.

  “I smell death.”

  Hayden nodded. “We should shift. We need thumbs.”

  Jude shifted behind the plane and pulled on his clothing and boots. The back half of the plane had been ripped off, and jagged pieces of metal blocked a path inside. There was a very small crawl space between two pieces of wreckage and Jude eyed it.

  “You won’t fit,” Hayden chuckled. “Let’s pull the metal up.”

  Hayden pushed with little effort and the metal creaked as it bent upwards. Jude looked around the front of the plane. Suitcases leaned up against the seats and a teddy bear perched in the front. Jude picked it up and looked at it.

  “A kid? God, this can’t be good.” He looked up at Hayden.

  “Let’s check the cockpit, okay?” Hayden grabbed the handle on the door and yanked it back. The door flew off its hinges and they finally got a good look inside. Two bodies were slumped forward on the control panel, holding hands. Hayden swallowed a lump in his throat. Even in death, they had held onto each other. Both were skeletons; the bone struct
ure on the smaller one said female, the other was a man.

  “Oh God,” Jude whispered.

  “Let’s see if we can get any ID on them, okay? Someone might be missing them.” Hayden checked the pants on the man and came up empty. Jude was having similar luck with the woman.

  “No purse or anything,” Jude grumbled.

  A low growl alerted them to the presence of another. Hayden stepped forward and looked out of the cockpit. A black wolf with golden eyes was staring at him. His canines were in full view and the hair on his back and tail were a mile high. Hayden put his hands up.

  “We’re not here looting, okay? We just wanted to find out what happened and who they are so we can contact family.” The wolf snorted, but kept its stance. It was smaller, a lot smaller, than most he’d come across. This was a teenager at most.

  “Do you know them?” Jude whispered.

  Hayden stepped forward a bit and the wolf took off.

  “Wait!” Jude moved toward the back of the plane. Hayden’s hand restrained him by his bicep.

  “Don’t; he’s obviously scared of us. If we chase him, it could make it worse.” Hayden looked around the small plane. “Maybe we can get a number off the plane and have James run it?”

  “At this point I’m willing to try anything. These people deserve a burial,” Jude sighed sadly.

  After looking over the plane and its contents, Hayden took pictures with his cell phone and tried to send them to James. They might have to wait until they got closer to a cell tower to send them out. Hayden put the cockpit door back on and then looked at their surroundings. The river was about five hundred feet from the plane’s location. A ridge overlooked the entire area and Hayden motioned to it.

  “Let’s get up there and see if we can get an aerial shot with my phone.”

  It took a little bit, but they finally got to the top of the ridge. It was a long way down to the floor below. Hayden snapped pictures as the sun set. The temperature dipped again and Hayden looked around for a place to set up camp. Jude kept an eye out as Hayden scanned the ridge.

  “Hey, I found a cave,” Hayden said, motioning to Jude.

  “Is anything in it?” Jude asked, walking toward him.

  “Not that I can tell. Maybe some pine needles. I can’t smell any other scents, animal or otherwise.” Hayden looked around. “I’ll grab some firewood. Can you set it up?”

  “Why do I feel like you’re making me the little woman in this scenario? Why can’t I get firewood?”

  Hayden grinned. “Fine, you get the firewood and climb the hill again.”

  Jude’s dick stirred in his pants at that grin. Damn, Hayden was sexy. “Stop looking at me like that.”

  “Like what?” Hayden let his eyes roam over Jude slowly.

  “Like I’m the last cracker on the plate.”

  “I love crackers.” Hayden waggled his eyebrows.

  Jude snorted. “You are so annoying.”

  “I’m not boring, though.” Hayden pointed at Jude. “That’s what counts.”

  Jude smiled despite himself. He walked over to Hayden and took both his hands. Hayden seemed surprised at the contact and Jude looked into his eyes.

  “Thank you,” Jude said quietly.

  “For what?” Hayden searched Jude’s eyes.

  “You came for me in Germany, when my chute didn’t open. I treated you like shit and it was wrong. I’m sorry for all the things I said to you — ”

  “Don’t.” Hayden put his finger on Jude’s lips. “I should be apologizing. I tortured you when all I really wanted to do was this.” Hayden pulled Jude into his chest and took his mouth. There was a soft gasp of surprise from Jude before his mouth opened. Hayden swept inside and groaned.

  God, Jude tasted fantastic.

  Hayden waited for a slap; what he got instead was a low growl and Jude wrapping his arms around him, deepening the kiss. Hayden’s hand rested on the back of Jude’s neck, his fingers playing in the soft, raven hair. Jude’s fingers crept under his jacket and shirt and met with his bare skin. Hayden moaned softly. His other arm wrapped around Jude, pulling him even closer. Their hardened erections bumped, and Jude gasped.

  Hayden let go and broke the kiss. Stepping back, he waited for Jude to say something.

  “Firewood,” Jude blurted.

  They stared at each other for a few seconds before Jude turned and walked down the side of the ridge. Hayden ran a hand through his hair.

  “Great, just great, Hayden. Dumbass. Why did you have to ruin it by kissing him?” Hayden smacked himself in the forehead. “You’ll be lucky if he ever comes back.”

  ~*~

  Jude stumbled through the forest. His toes were numb and his lips tingled. Damn, what a kiss! Jude’s heart was still racing. Holy fuckballs, Hayden could kiss! He’d never been that turned on, that fast, by a kiss. It was becoming very clear to him that his anger with Hayden was quickly fading.

  As much as he wanted to think Hayden was still the asshole who had shoved him into lockers, called him a pole smoker, and generally made his middle school years horrific, Hayden wasn’t that Hayden anymore.

  Hayden had been right. Since they had met up again, he told Jude he was the one who needed to grow up and put the past where it belonged. In the past.

  Jude stopped walking.

  “What was I getting again?”

  “Firewood.”

  Jude jumped at the voice and stepped back. A grinning man stood staring at him. Jude’s hair rose on end. The smell of werewolf drifted up and Jude stepped back.

  “Who are you?”

  “I think the question should be who are you and what are you doing here?”

  Jude took a defensive stance. “I’m well within my rights to be here. This is Maccon land. You are trespassing.”

  “I’m the beta of the Siberian pack.”

  “Good for you,” Jude drawled. “I’m a werewolf of the Maccon line. You want to compare dick sizes next?”

  “If he does, I win.”

  Hayden’s voice came from behind him but Jude kept his eyes on the werewolf in front of him.

  “I’m Hayden Cox, the beta of my pack and a werewolf of the Maccon line as well. So, I believe you should answer the question. What are you doing here?”

  “I’m looking for a lone wolf. Small, black coat, golden eyes. You seen him?” the wolf asked.

  “I don’t like him.” Jude eyed the man in front of him.

  “Me neither,” Hayden replied. “No, we haven’t seen anyone. We’re out here making sure our rogues are behaving.”

  “Oh, well in that case, I should let you know they’ve dug a hole under the fence about three miles from here.” The werewolf smiled, eyeing Jude. “You’re a pretty little thing, aren’t you?”

  “Aren’t you guys homophobic?” Hayden stepped forward, standing right behind Jude.

  “I’m not. Besides, he doesn’t count.” He pointed at Jude. “He’s so pretty, you forget he’s a man.”

  Jude growled and lunged forward. Hayden’s hand restrained him and he snarled.

  “Now, now, let’s keep things friendly,” the man smiled.

  Hayden tilted his head. “Sure. Why don’t you run along before Jude shows you just how friendly he can be? You do realize he could rip your head off with one swipe, right?” Hayden smiled maliciously as the wolf backed up. Jude’s canines elongated and claws flared from his fingertips.

  “I think next time you should be a little more cordial, seeing how you’re on Maccon land,” Hayden ordered.

  “Like I said, there’s a way in here about three miles away.”

  “I wouldn’t worry about that; we’ll take care of it. I also gave you my name, and you didn’t return the favor. Why is that?” Hayden stepped in front of Jude.

  “It’s Lev. As I’ve said, I’m the beta of the Siberian pack.”

  “Well, Lev, as we’ve said, we’re out here making sure our rogues are being nice. I wouldn’t stay in here for long; Walter has been known to bite in
stead of bark.”

  “I’m sure I’ll be seeing you two again.” Lev smiled as he turned.

  “Oh, I hope so,” Jude called after him.

  Hayden turned to Jude and looked him over. “You okay? I heard voices so I came to investigate.”

  “You sure you didn’t just come out here for another kiss?” Jude ran a hand up Hayden’s forearm.

  Hayden pulled Jude closer to him. “Would you let me kiss you again?”

  “I want to do a lot more than just kiss right now.” Jude stared at the impressive chest before him. Fingers tucked under his chin and then he was looking into very blue eyes.

  “I want that, too.” Hayden looked at Jude’s lips, licking his own.

  “Firewood.” Jude inched closer to Hayden’s lips.

  “Yes, we need firewood,” Hayden mumbled.

  Jude backed away with a grin. “So, I’ll meet you back up there?”

  “So cruel.” Hayden narrowed his eyes. “Yes, I’ll get stuff ready.”

  ~*~

  By the time Jude got back to the cave, Hayden had set it all up. Jude chuckled at the beds. Hayden had put them on either side of the cave. He dropped the firewood by the pit and took a seat outside on the rocks Hayden had put nearby. He eyed Hayden as he made dinner.

  “You’d make a great wife,” Jude chuckled.

  “So would you.” Hayden looked over his shoulder.

  “Have you…had a serious relationship before?”

  Hayden sat back, looking up at the sky. “No.”

  “No? Why not?” Jude asked.

  Hayden turned to face Jude and took a deep breath. “Because I’ve only wanted one man since I can remember. No one ever measured up to him, and no one ever will.”

  Jude swallowed hard. “Who?”

  “I think you know.” Hayden looked down at his hands. “It doesn’t matter, though. I caused so much damage and so much hurt, I’m not expecting anything. I’ll be happy if you just allow me into your life as a friend.” Hayden felt his face heating and stood up. “I’ll just get the rest of dinner.”

  Jude sat on the rock and considered Hayden’s confession. All this time? Jude balled his fists. Just friends? Oh hell no. Jude stalked back into the cave. Hayden was grabbing his pack. Jude coughed lightly and Hayden turned around.