Reject Me

by Jennifer Foor

  My mother was downstairs on her way out the door. Her hair was still wet from a shower. “Don’t forget tomorrow.”

  “I won’t, Mom. I’ve worked Sundays since I was in diapers.”

  “Don’t be flip. I know how you are. One minute you say you’ll be there and the next you’re callin’ from the beach sayin’ you ain’t comin’ home for days.”

  “I haven’t done that in a long time.” I grabbed a couple bottles of water out of the refrigerator and stuck them in a grocery bag as I spoke. “Besides, you’ve hired a ton of new people to help out since Joey quit.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Don’t remind me. None of them are half as good as your brother was. Pretty soon I’m going to have to put you in the back to cook.”

  I gave her a handsome look. “You can’t hide me in the back. I bring in the ladies and you know it.”

  My mother smacked me on the arm as we both walked out to our cars. “You’ve got a nice girl upstairs in your bedroom. Don’t talk like that in front of me, boy. You know better. In fact, if you feel the need to act like that than maybe you shouldn’t have a girl livin’ in our house. I like Peyton. I’ve known her since she was born, but that don’t make it right. I’m not wantin’ to hear anymore shit from her daddy because she’s stayin’ at our house. I gave him my word that you’d be good to her. You think I don’t hear her cryin’?”

  Crying? “What are you talkin’ about?” I played dumb, knowing damn well she was probably crying when I went out without her.

  “Jamey, do you think I’m stupid? I’ve raised two hard-headed boys. That girl is crazy about you. Treat her right or let her go. The relationship between you two has caused me enough grief. I should have never let you move her in here in the first place.”

  My friends pulled up in a big pickup truck that was pulling a trailer full of four-wheelers. “I’ve gotta go. Peyton’s fine, Mom. She’s just being a chick. I’ll see you in the mornin’.”

  My mother climbed into her car after calling me a name. I gave her a hard time like every other woman in my life. Sure, I was cocky. I knew I was. That didn’t mean I had to change to get what I wanted. I knew how to play my mother even better than I could mess with Peyton. Women were easy to read, and even easier to control.

  Once we got the four-wheelers loaded onto the trailer I climbed into the crew cab and was shocked with the person sitting next to me.

  Her name was Angie. She was my friend, Turk’s cousin from New Jersey, and I hadn’t seen her since we’d hooked up, right before I started seeing Peyton. Her smile welcomed me, and I couldn’t help but smile back. It brought me back to the weekend we’d spent together at the beach. “Long time no see,” I said as we started to pull away from my house.

  “Yeah.” She licked her glossy lips. “It has been. You look good, Jamey.”

  “You too.” I couldn’t lie. Two years had changed her for the better. I looked away and saw Peyton walking out to her car. My jaw clenched as I thought about her finding out that I was spending the day with someone I’d been with. She’d be pissed. Hell, she might even leave. For the first time in a long time it made me rethink going to the cookout with her.

  The further we got away from the house, the better I felt about my decision. What Peyton didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her. It wasn’t like I was going to nail this chick next to me. My dick was spent for the time being, and she’d come home and give it to me again if I asked.

  It was still going to be a long and very hard day.

  Chapter 3

  Peyton

  I watched Jamey out the window speaking to his mother. From inside I could hear his flip comments. It hurt me so much. I knew I needed to be strong and hold my ground, but somehow I couldn’t come up with the strength to do it. Yes, Jamey was cocky and he didn’t always treat me respectfully, but with the bad there was still good in him. I clung to the hope that one day he’d realize how much he meant to me, and that I’d do anything to be with him forever.

  I didn’t bother putting on my makeup, knowing that I’d cried off whatever I had on. My family were used to seeing me without it anyway. If they gave me a hard time I still had enough things at Shayne’s house to reapply. Even though I stayed at Jamey’s house, I wasn’t technically moved in with him. Most of my things were still at my brothers. I kept them there for two reasons. Need be, if our fights got too bad I could go there and feel like I wasn’t without my things. The other was that if we were to break up I’d have a place to live. I sort of felt like if I took everything out of the house then Shayne would make it a playroom and I’d lose my resource.

  Thanks to my brother, and his new wife, Ashley, I had a job. The pay wasn’t great, but it wasn’t like I had bills. My dad had paid cash for my car, and the insurance was still under his and my moms. My only bill was a cellphone and two credit cards for department stores. I made enough for all three of those in one week. Unlike what my family assumed, I was saving as much as I could in an account. I didn’t always want to rely on my brother, but I was only turning twenty, so I figured I had time to figure out what I wanted to do. My dad, who I never got along with, was too caught up with my brother Parker to worry about me anyway. He spent most of his days gaining gray hairs over the mess my brothers had made.

  Shayne raising Parker’s twins wasn’t just hard on my parents. Shayne had taken the brutal blow of almost losing them because of Parker. We’d turned our backs on him because he wouldn’t give up hope of having a future with Ashley.

  Their marriage seemed to heal a lot of damaged people. My parents came around and finally really accepted her as being a permanent part of the family, and Shayne had never been happier. Plus, he had the twins, which were the light of his life.

  Parker, on the other hand, had stayed away as if we all had the plague. He couldn’t come to grips with the fact that Ashley had given birth to twins after a one-night stand they shared together. After Ashley’s aneurism her memories became distorted. She remembered most things, but little details still escaped her sometimes. I got used to it, being around her everyday while my brother worked. Helping her take care of the twins felt so natural after doing it for so long. To be honest I think they just kept me around because I was family. Ashley was fully capable of doing everything they needed, except for when she had doctor’s appointments. The twins kept me busy enough to not dwell on my relationship with Jamey, or lack there of. I focused on them throughout the day, and went home to deal with him at night.

  There was nothing more upsetting than pulling up at my brother’s house without Jamey, again. I spotted Lacey and Joey out in the back yard. She waved when she saw me pull up. I rolled my eyes and looked at the empty seat next to me. Jamey was out somewhere with his friends, probably not thinking about me at all.

  I was so sick of everyone, including Lacey, telling me that he was no good for me. I knew how he was, but it was my choice to stick it out.

  If Joey could change then there was still hope for Jamey. There had to be. He couldn’t live his whole life controlling women to get what he wanted.

  I hated myself more for knowing he was doing it to me and I was doing nothing to stop it. The truth was that I wanted to give him whatever he asked for, because somewhere deep inside I wanted to be his forever.

  My sister-in-law, Ashley, greeted me at the door. She was holding a bottle of condiments in each of her hands. “Hey, we were wondering where you were.” She looked past me. “He didn’t come again?”

  Ashley was always the easiest for me to talk to. Maybe it was because she grew up knowing Joey and his younger brother, or maybe it was because she was now my sister. I didn’t really care what had bonded us as friends, since most of mine had gone off to college and forgotten all about our tiny ass town, and the people in it.

  It wasn’t like I had tons of friends to begin with. My reputation kept girls from trusting me. I was the female that the girls hid their boyfriends from, in fear of me taking them. Sometimes I did it too. In my defense I was young and
stupid. Ashley thinks it was because my brother Parker always got all of the attention, leaving me to crave it from wherever I could find some. She’d been taking a few classes online in hopes to become a therapist. She said she didn’t want to be a psychiatrist that could prescribe medication, but wanted to help people by talking about their problems and coming up with other solutions.

  She had her own demons, and a father that did his best to ruin her life.

  Another reason we were close; our daddy issues.

  “He made plans with friends a while back before you told us about the cookout,” I lied. As a matter of fact, I’d say anything to get everyone off my back. Ashley was only the beginning though.

  My brother came up to me as soon as I walked out back. I saw my parents pushing the twins on their matching swings. They both acknowledged me as I went to say hello to Lacey. She was sitting with my cousin Ford and his girlfriend Sky. It was still weird seeing all of them together in the same house. I never thought Shayne and Joey would get over themselves to be in the same room, but love had changed them. Even Ford, who used to date Ashley, had come around. I sat down with them and folded my hands, trying to get right into their current conversation.

  Lacey spoke first. “We were just talking about you.”

  “You were?” That could never be good.

  “We were taking bets on if Jamey would show,” Ford laughed out his words.

  I picked up a cheese curl out of the bowl between us and tossed it his way. “Don’t be a dick. He had something to do.”

  “Yeah, I bet he did.” Ford rolled his eyes.

  “All that matters is that you’re here,” Lacey added to soften the mood.

  They all knew the truth.

  My lies were even starting to get on my nerves.

  Sky shoved Ford before addressing the elephant in the room. She leaned in as she spoke, making sure nobody else than our table could hear. “Don’t let him get to you. He’s cut off for going golfing with your brother yesterday, so he’s in a grumpy mood.”

  “That’s not true,” he disagreed.

  I smiled as they bickered amongst themselves. When their conversation started to get personal I turned my attention to Lacey. “So what’s new?”

  She shrugged. “Joey’s been so busy with the restaurant that I’ve barely been able to talk to Sky and we live next door.” Lacey’s father owned a vineyard and restaurant about an hour away. Since Joey had returned home and begun looking for a permanent job, he’d kind of fallen into a partnership with Lacey’s dad. It was weird how Ford and Joey both worked for their girlfriend’s parents, but both jobs didn’t require them to be anywhere near each other. Lacey’s dad owned lots of small business’, so him buying a restaurant for his daughter and her chef boyfriend to run made sense. “Joey’s taking me to look at houses closer to the restaurant this week.”

  “So you’re going to move near Easton?”

  “St. Michaels. We want to be able to ride our bikes to work, you know to be able to work out before and after, since all the time we spend there takes away from the gym.”

  I looked over at my brother, Shayne, and Joey. They were standing at the grill, and I didn’t want to know what they were talking about, since most of the time they avoided each other. “That can’t be good,” I said as I pointed toward the two.

  “Shayne’s telling Joey about his realtor friend. Joey wants to buy a foreclosure that needs work. As if we don’t have enough on our plate.”

  “Stop acting like your daddy isn’t going to help you, Lace. You know he is,” Sky interrupted.

  “Probably. He hates our small apartment, and the fact that not even half of my clothes fit in our closets.”

  “You have problems,” I noted. Sky and I began to laugh, even though she was in the same situation with Lacey. How they ended up as a part of my extended family was beyond me.

  “Speaking of problems, has Joey talked to Jamey about taking over our lease?” Lacey’s question only made me more concerned about my relationship with Jamey.

  “I have no clue. Was he supposed to?”

  “He told me he did it last week some time.”

  That explained everything. Jamey and I were fighting a lot last week over a number that I found in the center console of his car. He claimed that it was old, but it didn’t make sense since we’d cleaned his car a dozen times in the past year. I knew he still flirted with women that came into the diner, but getting their numbers and not throwing them away was a whole different ballgame. To me, it meant he was interested in them. “He probably forgot to mention it.”

  Sky asked the next question. “Are you excited about the ski trip we’re all taking together this Thanksgiving?”

  My heart dropped. “Ski trip?”

  “Yeah, we saw Jamey last Sunday at the diner. He said to count him in for two people. Maybe he wants to surprise you with it? That’s so sweet. Don’t tell him I told you, just in case.”

  I tried to smile, implying that I’d be the one that he invited, though I knew it wasn’t the truth. As the day went by I was suddenly realizing that maybe all my efforts were for nothing. Jamey wasn’t making plans for us long term. I was a temporary fix.

  I began to cry, unable to hold my emotions in any longer. I knew they’d follow me into the house and up the stairs, expecting me to spill about what was going on with me, but I wasn’t prepared for what they were going to say to me.

  I’d made it to the bathroom before the door opened and they found me sitting on the closed toilet seat. “Come out with it. What’s going on? Did you break up?”

  I looked over through my tear-filled eyes to see Lacey, Sky, and Ashley waiting for an answer. “You’re not going to go away until I tell you, are you?”

  “I told you he doesn’t treat her right,” Sky said to Lacey.

  “We didn’t break up, well, not exactly. Things are just complicated. I love him so much it hurts, you know? I want to be serious with Jamey, but he acts like that word is off limits. I don’t know what else to do to make him change. I try to make him happy. I give him everything he wants. He says I’m clingy and pushes me away, though. What am I doing wrong?” I needed a solution that obviously I couldn’t figure out myself.

  “You need to dump his ass,” Ashley interrupted.

  “Yeah, you should,” Sky agreed.

  Before I could argue Lacey added, “What they mean is that if you cut him off he’ll come running back.”

  “What if he doesn’t?” It was my greatest fear. “What if he’s only hanging on for the sex?”

  Lacey leaned down and touched my arm. “If that’s what he’s doing do you really want to be with him? Peyton you deserve to be happy.”

  “I’m happy when I’m with Jamey.”

  “No you’re not,” Ashley announced. “You complain about him every day. I hear you fighting with him on the phone, and watch you read his texts.”

  I looked away from the women in the bathroom. “So I’m just supposed to break my own heart to see if he comes back?”

  “Honey, you’re heart is already broken. Don’t you see that?” Ashley came in and the other two moved aside. “Your brother tries to keep quiet about it, but he tells me how worried he is. When you’re with Jamey it’s like you become blind.”

  “He can change.” I was taking up for him, defending him when I knew it was wrong. “He just needs time.”

  Lacey corrected me right away. “You need to be away from him, Peyton. Just come here for a few weeks and let things settle down. The two of you are like gasoline to a fire. If you keep going on like this there’s going to be an explosion. He talks to his brother and I know you don’t want to hear it, but he’s not serious like you are. Don’t keep hurting yourself day in and day out. Make him see what he’s lost. It’s the only way you’ll know how he really feels. Trust me.”

  I wanted to trust them, not just because they had me pinned in the bathroom, but because I knew deep down that they were right. Jamey was using me because I was
letting him. As much as it broke my heart I was the only person who could do anything about my predicament. “I do trust you. It’s just harder than just walkin’ away. I don’t know if I can do it.”

  “You have to.” They all said at once.

  I let out an air-filled laugh behind my tears. “What if I don’t want to?”

  What if I couldn’t was the real question that I needed to be asking. Walking away from something that I loved wasn’t going to be easy at all, not when I had this ill feeling that he’d be perfectly fine about it, and I’d be left all alone, feeling worse than I did. “Fine,” I began to cry more as I spoke. “I’ll break up with Jamey.”

  They stayed in the bathroom with me until I could come to grips with my decision and calm down. Sky stayed with me when Shayne and Joey came looking for Ashley and Lacey.

  I tried to change the subject. “It’s weird seeing you all gettin’ along with Ash.”

  “She’s been through a lot. At the end of the day Shayne and Ford are family. I can choose to hate her and stay away, or forgive her and be with my boyfriend. He left the choice to me.”

  “She’s changed. Even before the aneurism she was different,” I agreed.

  “Your brother saved her. They’re good together.”

  Sky knew Shayne because he dated Lacey. She knew him as a male whore, who cheated. Then she watched him, just like we all did, change into the man he now was; the devoted father and husband. It was still weird to wrap my head around, but I saw that devotion firsthand, and admired that every man could change. It’s the reason why I had such hopes of changing Jamey. “Do you think Jamey loves me?”

  I could see the doubt across her face before she answered. It was like a knife driving into my chest. “I think Jamey needs to stop loving himself before he can begin to love someone else. I’m sorry, Pey. I know it isn’t what you want to hear.”

  I sniffled and looked away. “I know.”

  “You’ll get through this.” Her encouragement wasn’t going to help me tell Jamey that I was walking away from whatever we had. I was going to have to do it all on my own, and I wasn’t sure how I was going to find the courage the go through with it, but knew I had to.