My Life From Hell

by Tellulah Darling

  I’d always hated the fact that my goddess awakening had triggered Cassie’s own prophetic abilities. I couldn’t help worrying that I was still triggering stuff for her. That all my anger and unease were amping her up. And not in a good way.

  I stepped back at Anil’s nod, but stood gnawing on my lip.

  Cassie noticed and placed her hand on my arm. “No worries, girlfriend! Tonight is about forgetting! Eat, drink, and be merry, right!” She beamed at me but I could feel the waves of anxiety coming off her.

  “Right,” I said. “You have fun tonight. Enjoy your guy. He’s a good one.”

  Cassie blushed as Anil slipped his arm around her waist and pressed a kiss to her temple. I could see her relax. Maybe Anil was a talisman to keep her grounded. Man, I hoped so.

  I smiled at them both and with a small wave, went to find the two boys who were keeping me sane. And alive.

  I stood back from the dance floor for a minute, and took it all in. I saw Cassie bouncing to the beats, while Anil flailed like an enthusiastic puppy. Beyond them, deep in the crowd, I caught sight of Pierce’s wings. He and Hannah had come down.

  They moved beautifully. Big surprise. Even the stunning otherworldly beings around them noticed. But my friends didn’t come off as snobby, or aloof. Hannah’s arm was draped on Pierce’s shoulder and he had one arm locked around her waist. They gazed into each other’s eyes, huge smiles on their faces as the love flowed between them.

  Everyone around them felt the effect, smiling and swaying toward them as if to bask in their glow. It was hard to begrudge that kind of love and happiness. And I really didn’t. I guess I just wished there were two of Hannah so that Pierce and I could both have her attention.

  I watched Festos and Theo, their hands on each others’ hips, and grooving together. It meant they weren’t moving around much, which probably worked for Festos since he didn’t have his cane. Also, it allowed them maximum touching.

  No downside.

  Theo pressed his hand into the small of Festos’ back, pulling him closer as he leaned in to say something. Fee’s lips tugged up in a small grin. That’s when Festos looked up and saw me at the edge of the floor. He crooked his finger, beckoning me to come dance with them.

  So I did. I tried to dance beside them but, shockingly, it was Theo who would have none of it. He pulled me between them.

  At first, I couldn’t stop laughing. I was the center of this boy-sandwich, and Fee was acting exceptionally lewd. But soon the music swirling around us was too compelling to resist. We quit fooling around and lost ourselves in the sound.

  The night progressed. We didn’t leave the dance floor.

  Friday night turned to the dark, first hours of Saturday morning.

  Sweat poured between my cleavage. I’d lost my shoes hours ago, and the sprung floor was bouncy and warm under my feet. My mind was fabulously blank. I was alone in this moment, the music driving me forward through the night.

  The beats got wilder, our dancing more abandoned. Festos’ fingers threaded through mine, and our arms flew upward as we swayed together. Theo’s arms snaked along my hips and held Fee’s waist. My eyes were closed and my face turned to the lit tiles as I grooved between my friends, unsure of where I stopped and they began.

  As much as it may have looked like the dirtiest of dancing, it wasn’t sexual at all.

  It was transformational. The ultimate sense of being free and alive and connected.

  I was bliss.

  The music changed, the melody shifting as our unseen DJ mixed “All You Need is Love” into the pounding rhythm.

  My eyes shot open and I dropped my arms to my side. A prickling awareness came like an alarm over my skin.

  Kai had arrived.

  I pulled myself free of Theo’s grasp, murmured, “Back in a sec,” into Festos’ ear and tried to make my way through the dancing throng to where I could feel him. I pushed deeper and deeper into the crowd, passing Hannah, who shot me a quizzical glance. “Want me to come?” she mouthed.

  I shook my head and kept moving, barreling forward. As much as I wanted to see Kai, I didn’t need visual confirmation to follow him. I could sense him.

  I broke through the bodies and found myself all the way at the back edge of the floor. I scanned the area, trying to get a handle on where Kai was. I had to find him. It was no coincidence he’d shown up when that damn song had started to play. That song would always be tied to my visions, and so, to Kai. Or rather, the lack of Kai.

  I couldn’t see him, but I caught sight of a door and knew he’d gone that way. I hurried through it, finding myself in a stairwell. Taking the stairs two at a time, I jumped my way down one floor, the cement cool under my still-bare feet. I hit the next landing and burst through the door into a subterranean level.

  The vibe was very different here. Instead of dancing throngs or, intimately chatting groups, I found myself in a long, wide corridor. The same balls of light were mounted on the wall, but less frequently.

  Revelers streamed in and out of various rooms. I passed by a chillout room where a six-foot-tall musical fountain placed impossibly in a wild garden, pulsed to a mellow beat during a perpetual sunset. Club-goers lay around it on giant pillows strewn in lush grass, transfixed.

  There was a dark room where goth patrons drank to the blast of industrial music at a bar built from scrap metal on a rooftop overlooking a post-apocalyptic megacity. And a room where masked dancers whirled like dervishes to the sound of drums in a moonlit courtyard. Molten streams of lava writhing around them.

  One of the dancers held out a hand to me. I sensed keen eyes from behind her lavishly bejeweled mask. My heart kicked up into my throat. I desperately wanted to go in. But there was no time. With a regretful smile, I sped up, feeling the need to get to Kai. To see him. To talk to him.

  I rose on my tiptoes, trying to find him above the crowd. Nothing. But I knew with absolute certainty that he was here.

  The rooms blurred as I raced past them, until I stood before a closed door at the end of the hall.

  Unfortunately, a beefy and rather hairy satyr barred my way. He was clad only in dark green genie pants embroidered with peacocks’ tails splayed in full glory. “What’s your hurry?” he asked in a rumbling voice, an amused glint in his eyes.

  I forced myself to make eye contact, and not take a step back. “Just going in, thanks.”

  The satyr shook his head, laughing a laugh I felt deep in my bones. He wasn’t being creepy. He just found me highly entertaining. The satyr gave me a gentle push back down the corridor. “The lava room is more your speed.”

  Never mind that I’d thought the same thing. “Presumptuous of you.” I said, shaking him off and stepping forward. “Besides, my boyfriend’s inside.”

  He sighed as if he thought going in was a foolish idea. “You’re not going to find what you need.”

  I gave him a tight smile, really ready to be done with this and find Kai. “I need to talk to him.” I pushed past and turned the knob. As I stepped inside the room, I heard him say, “You’re wrong, baby. Love. That’s all you need.”

  I whipped back around to ask him what he meant. Because hello, again with that song,

  But he was gone.

  With a sigh, I returned my attention to the room. The door clanged shut behind me as I realized there was no room. There was no club. There was no Kai.

  I found myself in a rain slicked alley, late at night, still barefoot. I swung around and pounded on the door. “Hey! Let me back in!” I kicked for good measure, since I had no idea where I was and no desire to be out here alone.

  I let out a grrr of frustration. My itchiness was back. Stomping along the ground, scratching, I searched for the nearest tree to get myself the hell out of here.

  Lost in my thoughts, I almost jumped out of my skin when a car horn blasted at me. I leapt out of the way as a black limo careened to a stop and blocked my way. The back passenger door swung open. “Get in.” I heard a familiar voice inside.


  Damn.

  Hermes had arrived and that could only mean trouble.

  Six

  I peered into the dimly lit interior of the limo, eyes narrowed. “Lovely to see you too, Jack, but I’m busy.”

  Media mogul Jack Wing, Hermes’ public persona, regarded me with his shrewd dark eyes. “I don’t like playing messenger tonight any better than you like having me, kid. Now get in already so I can get home to bed.” He gave a sharp tug on a cuff of his perfectly tailored pinstripe suit, the image of wealth and power.

  “What’s the deal?”

  “An official summons,” he said steadily.

  Great. “Tell Pops he can go screw himself. He gets his chance to kill me next week.” I moved to slam the door, but Jack was surprisingly fast for a middle aged guy. Okay, middle aged looking guy. He caught the door and leaned out toward me, his gaze intense. “A meeting. Not an attempt. Safe passage guaranteed.”

  I raised my eyebrows. “I’m waiting.”

  Jack gave an exasperated huff. “I swear on the Styx.”

  I considered my options. Really, I didn’t have any. If Zeus wanted to see me, he’d see me with or without my say in the matter. Besides, Kai was gone. And my birthday high was dead now. Might as well pick a fight with my father in time-honored teen tradition.

  I scrambled into the limo and shut the door.

  “Isn’t the outfit a bit much?” Jack asked.

  “It’s my birthday. I was celebrating,” I said flatly.

  “Without shoes?”

  I glanced down at my bare feet. “You try wearing heels.”

  Jack laughed.

  “What does Pops want with me?”

  He shrugged. “Not just your father. Hades too.”

  “Come on!” I glared at him.

  He smiled. “Happy birthday.”

  I turned my head and stared out the tinted window. I could tell we were moving by the sights passing by, but I sure couldn’t feel the road beneath us. This puppy was smooth. And the seats were plush. Might as well enjoy the ride.

  We drove for several hours. The long ride must have been the gods’ way of amping up my anxiety, by building my tension around the meet. We could have blinked directly to the location.

  Eventually, we came to a small strip mall on the outskirts of some cookie-cutter suburb. It consisted of a discount shoe store, a dry cleaner, and Marina’s Taverna, a Greek restaurant. The limo came to a stop in front of Marina’s and the door on my side opened.

  Jack saluted me. “Have fun, kid.”

  I got out of the limo. “Give my regards to Aphrodite.” The ditzy bat.

  Jack smiled, as if he knew what I was thinking. Then the door swung closed and the limo departed.

  I really wished I was wearing shoes. If nothing else, I could grind a heel into my father’s foot if he pissed me off. Well, there was no helping that now. I straightened my shoulders, held my head high, and strode inside.

  I expected the worst Greek tackiness with plaster statues of gods, but the place was surprisingly tasteful. Airy with high ceilings. Rectangular blue panels were inset into white walls. The chairs were made of simple varnished wood, while white cloths covered each square table. A fully stocked bar, curved and gleaming took up one side of the interior, with the kitchen visible to the right.

  The restaurant was empty except for a kind-looking woman in chef’s whites who smiled at me as I entered. Marina, I presumed. “Come. This way,” she said, with more than a hint of a Greek accent.

  My heart stuttered. She sounded exactly like Demeter had when Jack had created an illusion of her to trick me. I’d been royally suckered and heartbroken. “Thank you,” I said quietly, and followed her through the space.

  She led me out the back doors onto a large patio, covered by a gazebo of white beams. Flowing white cloth had been woven to make the roof. The fabric also formed curtains, tied back to create half-walls.

  A seating area with white leather sofas and tall cacti filled one corner. Large glass lanterns encircled the patio, fat pillar candles blazing brightly in each one. A tall patio heater kept the space toasty.

  In the center of the patio, a dark wood table had been laid out, laden with yumtastic Greek tapas like pita wedges, pink creamy taramasalata, triangles of spanakopita, and a heart attack heaven of saganaki—fried cheese.

  Zeus and Hades sat there munching in silence. Not even the tense “One wrong move and there’s gonna be a hurting” silence you would have expected from two powerful foes who despised each other. Nah. More like “Eh, it’s family and family is gonna push your buttons, but we’re here now, so let’s eat.”

  I took a moment to scope them out before I approached.

  Most gods on Earth tended not to appear much taller than six feet. To blend in. But not these two. From the way they both dwarfed their chairs, I could tell they hit seven feet easy. Guess neither could stand to appear too human.

  They looked ridiculous. Not just because of their height either. Hades had decided to wear pleated khakis, a plaid button-down shirt and a cardigan. Which sounded very golf dad but came off as bad-touch relative wrong when combined with his bloated alcoholic looks, and all around messed up energy. He wasn’t giving off his usual charming, yet evil, vibes.

  Pops, on the other hand, was his regular metrosexual self, all baby smooth skin and buffed mani. While I’d only seen him in linen suits and a fedora, his current outfit could have been taken off one of the club goers I’d just been with.

  No girl should ever see her father in a suit that skinny, shiny, or tight. Scouring that image from my memory banks might require therapy.

  I slid into an empty chair between the two of them, glancing around to see if maybe Kai was here. “What’s with the family reunion?” I asked. I could smell dad’s citrus cologne, and knew better than to sniff for whatever brimstone Hades wore.

  My father handed me a plate and motioned for me to load up. Ordinarily, I would have been happy to, but I was sulky that my dance-fueled peace had dissipated, and I didn’t feel like breaking bread with two people who wanted me dead.

  I set the plate down.

  My father shot me a puzzled look. “Are you not feeling well? I know how much you like to eat.”

  Now I was definitely not eating. Which was a shame because I’d started to waver about the saganaki. “Such a charmer, Pops. Let’s cut to the chase, shall we?”

  “We thought we’d treat you to a last supper,” Hades laughed. “Since you’ll be dead soon.”

  I gave the smug bastard a tight smile. “So sure of that, are you?”

  He nodded. “Yes. You’ve been outwitted and outplayed.”

  Zeus threw him a sour look. “My progeny. Mine to tell. You got to tell yours.”

  Hades muttered something about big babies, but flinched when Zeus sat up sharply.

  Zeus smirked then turned to me. “We’ve warded up your ward.” He gave me an assessing glance. “Do you understand what that means?”

  “Yeah,” I ground out. It meant that Zeus and Hades had put a ward up around our ward, effectively blocking our access to Eleusis and the ritual location.

  Zeus patted me on the head, like a particularly clever puppy.

  I jerked my head away.

  He smiled as Marina set a plate of steaming moussaka—a kind of Greek eggplant lasagna—in front of him and a lamb dish before Hades. Zeus’ smile was for the food, not Marina. She was dismissed with a lazy wave and no thank you. I doubted my father tipped, so this night had to suck for her.

  Hades picked up his lamb and tore into it. I turned away from that grossness and focused on my father’s dainty bites. Which were equally disturbing. It was like there was no middle with these two. Everything in extremes.

  “My brother and I have realized that fighting is beneath us. We are not the issue here.” Zeus speared a tiny bit of ground beef and cream sauce, and popped it into his mouth.

  I rolled my eyes.

  “It’s true,” he insisted. “The issue is hu
manity failing to worship us as is our due.”

  Astounding. I ran my thumb around the rim of my water glass. “Maybe you’re not relevant to humanity, you egotist.”

  Zeus shot me a pitying glance.

  Right. How could that possibly be the case?

  “Thus have we decided that on the equinox, at the moment of our greatest power, Hades and I will wipe out humanity and live in a pure world. A world of only gods.”

  “That’s very Aryan of you,” I snarled, trying to ignore the burning tingle along my arms. I’d learned not to show any weakness around these two. Not that they didn’t generally ferret it out.

  “We’re housekeeping,” Hades said through greasy lips. “Losing the clutter.”

  I smacked my hand against the table. “Are you hearing yourselves? You’re going to wipe out mankind because they don’t love you enough?”

  “Worship, not love,” Zeus corrected.

  I shook my head. “I don’t buy this for a second. The reason you’ve been fighting isn’t because of people adoring you, it’s because you both want to be top dog. How does this change anything?”

  “With no Earth and no humans taking up valuable real estate in the Underworld,” Hades said, pausing to slug back some wine, “we can unite our two realms. Gods and goddess can live freely and we will be rulers of the only two domains left.”

  I rose, fed up with the BS they were feeding me. “No. Here’s what’s really going to happen. You’re going to kill all humans out of spite, and then fight it out until one of you is dead. And that second part, I highly support. But you are not harming any more humans on my watch. So thanks for the big reveal, but we’re done.”

  I turned to leave but Zeus’ hand snaked out and caught my arm. He yanked me back into my seat. “I wasn’t finished speaking, child,” he said in a mild voice that was totally at odds with his cold eyes.

  I stayed put. And kept my mouth shut. This was not the moment to get snotty.

  “The reason I shared this with you, is that you are still of my blood.” Pops looked a little put out at having to admit that. “I have tried to guide you and teach you the error of your ways but—”