Brooks (Dirty Misfits MC #1)

by Rylan, Savannah

  I patted it before sipping my coffee. “That’s good. That’s very good.”

  He slid his phone out of his pocket. “And I’m probably going to shoot Archer a text here in a second to keep an eye and an ear out for Chops while I’m gone. The man will have more of an emotional stake in all of this.”

  “Why’s that?”

  He started texting away. “If I told you that, I’d give away the church meeting. But just trust me when I tell you it’s not good.”

  I snickered. “If Chops is involved? Doesn’t shock me one bit.”

  He grinned. “There. Sent.”

  “What did you tell him?”

  His eyes flickered across the screen. “Keep your ears out for Chops. He’s up to something. And come to Raven’s if you guys need to talk. That’s where I am.”

  “Good. They’re welcome here anytime.”

  He put his phone away. “So, what’s the plan? Are you actually going to try and work while all of this is going on?”

  “I mean, do I really have a choice?”

  He shrugged. “You could take some vacation?”

  “I have to put in for it at least a week in advance.”

  “Then, put it in tomorrow. Cash in a week or two.”

  I blinked. “Or three. Maybe four?”

  He slowly looked over at me. “How much vacation do you have saved up?”

  I paused. “Never really felt the need to take it after Gage died. It’s just kind of been rolling over ever since.”

  He took my hand. “I’m so sorry, Raven. From the bottom of my heart, I—”

  I squeezed it. “It’s not your fault. Even though I know you’ll blame yourself, it honestly isn’t. There’s so much about that night that we don’t know about, there’s no telling who the hell is to blame for what really happened.”

  He scooted closer to me. “You have my word I’ll figure it out, though. Because something in my gut tells me Chops’ shit is all wrapped up into this.”

  I balked. “You think Chops had something to do with Gage’s death?”

  “And Hyde’s. Either that, or he’s at least covering for who is responsible. And neither of those things are going to fly now that I’m back.”

  I turned to face him. “Promise me something.”

  He nodded. “Anything.”

  “Promise me you’ll find out who did this to Gage and Hyde. If it’s something someone has deliberately done.”

  He cupped my cheek, gazing into my eyes. “You have my word.”

  “Good.”

  His eyes studied mine and our bodies gravitated toward one another. My body leaned into his, wanting nothing more than his comforting warmth. The voice in the back of my head screamed at me to stop. My heart slammed against my chest, almost as if it were pumping the brakes inside of my ribcage. And when I felt Brooks’ breath against my lips, my pelvis warmed.

  Which halted me in my tracks.

  “I should get some sleep,” I said softly.

  Brooks licked his lips. “I think we could both use some sleep.”

  I slowly pulled away, thumbing over my shoulder. “Guest bedroom is just down that hallway. I’m upstairs, right above you.”

  He nodded. “There a bathroom down here, too?”

  “Yep. The first door to the left down the hallway. It’s not accessible from the bedroom, but it’s right there.”

  “It’ll be fine, thank you.”

  I stood to my feet. “Feel free to help yourself to the toiletries in here, too. And the food in the kitchen. There isn’t much since it’s just me here, but you’re welcome to it.”

  He grinned. “Thanks.”

  A warmth crept through the marrow of my bones. “Anyway, time for a rest for me.”

  He sipped his coffee, his eyes never wavering from my own. “I’ll be down here if you need me.”

  I always need you. “Great. Wonderful. I’ll see you after my nap.”

  My eyes held his for a beat and a half more before I finally pulled away. The spell he had on me from the first night we met felt stronger than ever despite the distance and silence between us over the years. As I made my way for the kitchen, I prayed my staircase was enough to keep us apart. As I threw back the rest of my coffee, my mind begged for any God above to rid me of the emotions I felt for the man who had just invaded a home I once shared with his best friend.

  I felt his eyes on me as I set my mug in the kitchen sink. I felt his stare against the sway of my hips as I made my way up the stairs. Without another work spoken, I put distance between myself and the man that still held part of my heart. And when I got to the top of the steps I wanted to cry, I felt so guilty. I wanted to vomit, I felt so selfish.

  It didn’t stop the thought from crossing my mind, though. The one thought that told me just how deep into this shit I already was.

  I really hope Brooks follows me up here.

  And I scurried into my bedroom to shield myself from the shame I knew was barreling up the stairs behind me.

  Nineteen

  Brooks

  I watched her ascend the steps while my mind roared out for me to follow her. I’d never felt the need for more control around any woman I’d ever come across like the need for control I felt whenever Raven was around. She tugged at parts of me no woman had ever tugged before. She permanently altered parts of my soul that would forever be touched by the simplicity and beauty of her presence. I was hopelessly, undoubtedly, and forever emotionally attached to this woman.

  And it killed me that I couldn’t have her.

  “Don’t follow her, dude. Don’t do it,” I murmured to myself.

  I heard her soft footsteps pause at the top of the steps before the sound of her door closing thudded for my ears to hear. Then, I heard her padding around down the hallway. I thought about what she might be doing. The clothes she might be stripping away from her perfect body and the shower she would surely take just to rid the ghost of my touch off her skin. I set my diesel fuel coffee off to the side, wondering how in the living fuck Raven could drink something like that.

  Then, I eased myself down onto the couch and closed my eyes.

  “What the fuck?” Gage asked.

  “Brooks! Help!” Raven shrieked.

  I rolled off the couch and hopped to my feet before I went dashing up the steps. Raven’s cries of horror and pain ricocheted off the corners of my mind as I rounded around the banister. My eyes widened when I saw Raven chained down to her bed. Blood boiled in my veins when I saw Chops hovering over her with that disgusting smile on his face.

  “You get the fuck away from her!” I roared.

  But just as I took a step toward the door, it slammed shut.

  “Raven!” I cried out.

  I banged my fist against the door while she kept screaming my name.

  “Brooks! Help me! Please!”

  Gage’s voice appeared beside me. “Why isn’t she calling out for me anymore?”

  My eyes whipped over toward the sound and I saw him standing there.

  “Gage?” I asked breathlessly.

  Raven’s bed creaked. “Brooks! Please!”

  Chops mocked her. “Brooks! Please! Shut up, bitch.”

  I growled and punched the door. “Open this damned thing now!”

  Gage gripped my shoulder, turning me back to him. “You slept with my wife, didn’t you?”

  The sounds of Raven’s screaming backdropped my head shake. “No. Of course not. I could never—”

  Gage gripped my chin. “Don’t you fucking lie to me. I always know when you’re lying.”

  I pulled away from his touch. “Grab me again like that and you’ll—”

  “No! Chops! Stop!”

  Fury rushed through my veins. “Raven!”

  Gage held me back. “Admit it. You always wanted her, didn’t you? You always wanted to steal my wife from me.”

  “Brooks!”

  I drew in a deep breath. “Get your fucking hands off her, Chops, or I’ll cut them off myself!�
��

  Gage hissed in my ear. “You like fucking my wife?”

  I growled. “You’re fucking dead, and she deserves the love you’re not to here to give her.”

  I kicked my feet off the ground and slammed them against the bedroom door. I took Gage to the ground, knocking the wind out of him just as Chops flew toward my body. He collapsed on top of me, his teeth gnashed as Gage held my arms back behind me.

  And when Chops wrapped his hands around my throat, the sounds of Raven’s screaming faded into the background.

  “Touch her again, and I’ll kill you myself,” Gage whispered.

  Chops chuckled. “Fuck me over, and I’ll send you to the same place I sent Gage. Got it?”

  “Brooooooooks!”

  “Raven!” I exclaimed.

  I shot straight up off the couch with cool sweat dripping down my face. I slung my legs over the side of the couch and stood, shrugging my leather jacket off. I wiped my brow off with my navy blue t-shirt, flipping it up and dabbing at my face as if I had just washed it.

  Then, her voice sounded from the kitchen. “You hungry?”

  The sound of something sizzling caught my ear. “Raven?”

  “I’m making bacon and eggs. Want it on a sandwich or something? That’s what Gage always wanted.”

  I blinked as I turned to face her. “Why are you making breakfast?”

  She smirked. “Because it’s breakfast time, that’s why.”

  I paused. “I slept all day?”

  She nodded. “And all night. Though, I can’t really say it was a restful sleep for you. You prone to nightmares like Gage?”

  Stop saying his name. “Yeah, I am.”

  She scooped bacon out of the pan. “So, just the bacon and eggs? Or you want it on a sandwich?”

  I swallowed hard. “I don’t care.”

  She shrugged. “Suit yourself.”

  She piled a plate high with food before sliding it away from her on the kitchen counter. I walked over and scooped up the plate, then sat down where a fork and a big glass of orange juice sat at the small table. I picked up the glass and chugged it back, drinking down the ice cold goodness before slamming it back against the table.

  And without hesitation, Raven turned away from the stove to refill my glass.

  “Thanks,” I murmured.

  She put it back in the fridge. “Anytime. I noticed you didn’t finish the coffee, so I figured this might be a better choice.”

  I snickered. “You like your coffee like Gage.”

  “And how did Gage like his coffee?”

  I picked up my fork. “Hot, burnt, and so powerful it could fill a car’s gas tank.”

  She giggled. “Sounds about right.”

  The sound washed over me like the waves of the ocean that beckoned to us yesterday and it gave me pause. After everything that had transpired and everything that Raven had been through since I got released two days ago—holy shit, it had only been two days—didn’t she deserve a right to know about the church meeting?

  Especially now that I understood the threat Chops had given her?

  “What is it?” Raven asked.

  She sat across from me with a plate half my size filled to the brim with fruits and hard-boiled eggs.

  “No bacon?” I asked.

  She shook her head. “Gotta watch my figure. I’ve put on a bit of weight since—”

  “You look perfect, Raven.”

  Her eyes met mine. “Well, my doctor doesn’t think so.”

  “Your doctor sounds like a quack.”

  She giggled. “A quack, huh? What are you, from the fifties?”

  I grinned. “I can be anything you want.”

  Something passed behind her eyes, but it was so fleeting that I didn’t have time to decipher it. But whatever it was, it made her cheeks flush the deepest shade of red I’d ever seen against her skin.

  And I loved it.

  “So, I had a lot of time to think in bed last night,” Raven said.

  I took a bite of my eggs. “Me, too.”

  She snickered. “Your nightmares reveal something?”

  I shrugged. “They usually do, once you think about them long enough.”

  She sipped her diesel fuel coffee. “Want to talk about it?”

  I took a bite of bacon. “Actually, I think maybe we should talk about Chops.”

  She blinked. “Why?”

  “I know why he made the threat to you that he did yesterday, and I think you deserve a right to know.”

  She put down her fork. “Actually, I’m glad we’re on this topic, because I think I might know who he was talking to on the other end of the line.”

  That caught my attention. “Who?”

  She leaned back. “So, you get out of prison and the Black Flags show up at my door, right?”

  I nodded. “Right.”

  “And despite what I’ve seen, I know they’ve been watching. At least, watching me long enough to know your secret knock.”

  I chuckled. “It’s not really a secret.”

  “But it’s the knock you always use. Three big knocks before a series of small ones that I’d like to break your knuckles for, especially when it’s so damn early in the morning.”

  I smiled. “I didn’t know you cared so much.”

  She barked with laughter. “What I’m saying is, they knew that knock. That Black Flag guy? He used your knock.”

  “You know, I remember you saying something about that.”

  “And now that I’ve had time to think about it, it makes me wonder: they’ve been watching my place long enough and frequently enough to know that knock. Then, they just happen to use it the day you get out of prison?”

  “You think they wanted you to think I was at the door.”

  “Oh, I know they did. What I don’t understand is why. So, what if the ‘why’ is Chops?”

  My stomach hit the floor. “You think—”

  She reached for her coffee. “You have to admit, it makes sense. If Chops is, for some reason, working with the Black Flags, it answers a lot of questions that didn’t add up beforehand.”

  Yes, it does. “Fucking hell, if you’re right about that then none of us are safe right now.”

  “It’s a theory you should tell the guys, especially if they’re going to be around Chops for any given length of time. There’s no telling what this ‘other plan’ of his is. And if he’s doing it with the Black Flags?”

  I licked my lips. “Then, it’s certainly not good.”

  “Nope.”

  Tell her. “Since we’re kind of on this topic, I’d like to speak with you about something.”

  “Regarding the Black Flags?”

  I shook my head. “No.”

  “About Chops?”

  I blinked. “Okay, so we’re a bit past the topic. But I’d still like to talk with you.”

  She smiled. “Sure thing. What's it about?”

  God, you’re gorgeous when you smile. “About our encounter yesterday.”

  Her smile fell. “Oh.”

  I leaned forward. “I need you to understand that, while that was kind of the heat of the moment for me, it’s not like it was spontaneous.”

  She furrowed her brow. “I’m not following.”

  Step carefully. “What I’m saying is that—I mean I’ve kind of always—”

  Shit. I had opened this fucking can of worms and now my tongue wouldn’t work right.

  “Brooks, just say it,” she said softly.

  Almost as if she knew what was coming.

  “All right, then,” I said as I clicked my tongue. “Raven, I’ve had feelings for you since that night Gage and I first stumbled upon you at that bar. You looked so beautiful in the light of that booth lamp, and I don’t know why the fuck I didn’t make a move before Gage did.”

  She giggled softly. “He was almost more outgoing than you.”

  I scoffed. “Don’t I fucking know it. He was always pragmatic and loud as fuck. But that only added to the go
od man he was. I loved him as if he were my brother. Hell, he was my brother. And that day he asked you out in the car shop was the day I knew I needed to stop rather than pursue you.”

  She blinked. “What do you mean?”

  I shrugged. “That day in the shop, he admitted to me that he had feelings for you. Genuine feelings. ‘Not the momma kind, but the love kind’ is what he said.”

  She swallowed hard. “He said that to you?”

  “He did. And I guess that’s why I stopped entertaining the idea of asking you out myself. I knew how much Gage wanted you. How much he loved you, even from the very beginning. And I wasn’t about to take that chance away from my brother and my best friend. So, I let him have you. I let him take his chance, and I figured if it backfired then—given some time—I might get my chance.”

  Her head tilted to the side. “So, you backed down because your best friend supposedly claimed me first.”

  I sensed anger behind her words, and I knew that wasn’t good. “I know it’s not the best thing to say, but it’s all the words I’ve got before caffeine.”

  She licked her lips. “Right.”

  I sighed. “Raven, I never meant to—”

  She stood. “So, did no one wonder about what I wanted in all of this?”

  I furrowed my brow. “Given the fact that you married Gage, I figured you got what you wanted.”

  She scoffed. “You don’t know shit about me then.”

  I slowly stood. “There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t regret not stepping in. That I don’t regret not telling you how I really felt. But by the sounds of it, it sounds like you didn’t—”

  She pointed at me. “Don’t you fucking dare finish that sentence.”

  I snapped my lips shut and forced my brain to turn off.

  “How dare you even think that,” she hissed.

  I shook my head. “Raven, I’m sor—”

  She held up her hand until there was total silence. And when she drew in a deep breath, I buckled in for a ride.

  I just didn’t understand how insane that ride would be until she spoke again.

  Twenty

  Raven

  I didn't know what to feel. I didn’t know what to say. I was shocked by Brooks’ admission, but angered at the idea of how he interpreted my words. Never once did I catch the idea that this man had feelings for me. Never once did he exude any sort of flirtatious advances, secretive winks, or soft touches I had to smack his hand for. There was simply nothing. That night at the bar, he didn’t flirt. He didn’t engage me. He barely fucking talked, especially with Gage running his mouth the way he always did.