License to Love: Holiday Box Set (Contemporary Romance)

by Kristen James

  “Forever,” he breathed against her cheek. “Forever starts right now.”

  The End

  Embers of Hope

  Second Edition

  Book 1 of the Second Gift Series

  Edited by Carol Teegarden

  Return to Table of Contents

  Description:

  Savanna Thompson knows what it’s like when you blink and your life shatters. She’s been hiding her divorce from her best friend Cassie, but she knows she can’t any longer. Cassie’s husband, a firefighter, just died. Savanna rushes home, along with her one-year-old daughter to help, and now she’s staying with Cassie in a nursery meant for a baby that won’t ever exist. Cassie lost that dream along with her husband.

  Savanna wants to fix their relationship after hiding so much, but it’s complicated with Jason around. He’s the firefighter who saved Savanna’s life two and a half years ago. He just lost his best friend, and like Cassie, he blames himself for Mike’s death. When he convinced Mike to remain with the department, how could he know Mike would die fighting a house fire?

  Though hurting herself, something deep inside her won’t let her walk away. Jason needs her but she’s off limits on so many levels. She’s falling for this sexy firefighter but he confuses her to no end. Being stuck in the middle is enough stress, plus her own problems are festering behind her helping smile. Can Savanna find the balance between loving Jason, helping Cassie, and taking care of herself and her daughter? Or is she going to lose this bet and her best friend?

  Prologue

  A screaming alarm jarred Savanna from a deep sleep, and she stumbled out of bed, moving before thinking. It was only 3 a.m. She groaned and fumbled toward her bedroom door to go turn it off but paused when she coughed. Her eyes stung and the air felt dry and hot, sucking her breath away.

  Smoke! Her heartbeat skyrocketed into a painful and fast sprint. Where was it coming from? She stretched out her hand, planning to test the shut door, but she felt heat before even touching it.

  Whipping around, she ran to her bedroom window and tried to pry it open. She could jump from the second story. A broken bone wasn’t as bad as facing the flames on the other side of the door. She could probably land with just a few bruises anyway. Right?

  Why wouldn’t it open? She pried and yanked the window, cursing, until she felt it give. It slid up a few inches, just enough to let in more smoke. How could the smoke come in from her bedroom door and through the window? There had to be some way to get out. With her face pressed to the window, she could see an orange glow from flames billowing out of the apartment right below her.

  She was smack on top of the fire.

  The buzzing fear in her chest spread all over her body. Enough smoke had made its way into her room for her to see it now, and it grew thicker by the second.

  She couldn’t get out this way, and there was no way she wanted to sit and wait for the flames to burn through the door.

  Getting down on her hands and knees, she approached the door. At the last second, she thought to grab something to cover the door handle. Using the shirt she found on the floor, she turned the handle and cracked open the door enough to look into the hallway.

  Heat hit her face, stinging her eyes. It threw her backward into the room, but she scrambled back up onto her knees to stare down the fire. Smoke poured in above her. Flames licked up both sides of the door frame, leaving only a small gap to run through.

  Red and orange flames and sparks danced up the walls in the living room, on the ceiling in places, and around some of the furniture.

  She pulled herself up on her feet but didn’t stand up straight. If she did, her head would be in the thick smoke above. She breathed through the shirt.

  Okay, she had twenty feet between her and the door. Ready, set, go.

  “Ahh!” A wood beam crashed down in front of her. When she pulled her hand back to her mouth, she found she’d dropped the shirt. Coughing, she looked for a new way out.

  Wait a minute – why didn’t she just break the window? How on earth had she missed that? She turned to go back but found solid flames eating the hallway behind her. In fact, the fire now engulfed most of the hallway in front of her as well. She didn’t have anything to shield herself with, and her only chance was to run through the flames.

  If she went forward, she’d have scars the rest of her life if she made it out alive, but what choice did she have?

  “One, two, three, run!” She tried to move, but her body wouldn’t obey her. “One, two, three, run!” She froze again.

  Crying, she counted again and jumped. She ran into a geared-up firefighter, a sight almost as scary as the fire itself.

  Oh, thank God! She felt a wet blanket around her before he pulled her up into his arms. Water shot in through the open door and doused out flames as they proceeded out. Instinct had her shrinking into him, clinging to his gear as he rushed for the door, holding her tight.

  The heat subsided. They made it. She closed her eyes, trying to block out the bright inferno and the way she’d panicked. It very well could have killed her.

  Whoever carried her had strong arms, a broad chest. His mask had scared her that first second, but she clung to him now.

  Once clear of the building, he went straight to the ambulance and laid her on a stretcher. He pulled his mask up then. “Everything’s okay now.”

  His fiery brown eyes reflected the burning building as he stared into her face.

  “Miss?” He bent over her, concerned. His strong nose, slightly bent, fit right in with his wide cheekbones and square jaw. Savanna didn’t answer, just stared at the man who had saved her life.

  “Miss?”

  She still couldn’t take her eyes off him.

  He turned to someone else and said, “She might be in shock.” He leaned over her one more time and squeezed her shoulder. “You’re all right now. It’s okay.”

  And then he left.

  One

  Savanna stood at the counter of the rental agency, waiting to finish the paperwork for returning her moving truck. This so-called new beginning felt more like an ending right now. She’d spent the last few days driving from Texas back to her hometown of Eugene, Oregon, in the late August heat.

  The trip itself wasn’t the worst experience of her life. After all, it wasn’t like she’d walked here, but emotion after emotion had skipped through her, sending her into nervous worry or dark sadness. Stress had caught up with her when she stuffed everything she owned into a small self-storage storage unit before coming here.

  “Mama!”

  Though tired, she smiled at the toddler propped on her hip. A warm breeze blew in through the open door and played with Aubrey’s short brown curls. At last, the man slid a paper across the counter for Savanna to sign. She thanked him and sat down in the small lobby to call Cassie’s house, anxious to talk to her friend.

  She didn’t get Cassie, though. Someone else answered and said they’d send a ride, a man named Jason. She should have figured out another way to get to Cassie’s house, but that was an idle thought that wouldn’t go anywhere. It was a bit late for trying to cover things now. She hadn’t told anyone she was moving back. Everyone would assume she was just visiting and then returning to Texas.

  Not only was she dirty and worn out, but her baby girl was yawning and rubbing her eyes. Savanna headed to the bathroom to freshen up, though she doubted it would revive either of them much. She splashed cold water on her face. Aubrey looked hot, too, so Savanna rubbed water on her short curls, making brown tuffs stand up all over her head. While she couldn’t imagine Aubrey with anything but her big brown eyes and brown hair, they always reminded her of Aubrey’s father, someone she didn’t want to think about anymore.

  Aubrey wiggled from her arms and slid down, which left Savanna staring at herself in the mirror. Something about looking into her own eyes made her face the truth of the situation. A sob started up her throat. Determined to keep it in, she yanked a paper towel from the dispenser an
d held it over her mouth, but still the tears came. She felt so lost.

  Aubrey whimpered.

  “It’s fine, baby. I’m fine. I’m fine,” she said a few times too many and splashed more water on her face.

  “Bobby Boo, up,” Aubrey said softly, too seriously, while watching her mama with dark brown eyes.

  She wiped her smeared mascara with a wet paper towel, trying to smile. “Come on, kiddo. Let’s go outside.”

  Her “Bobby Boo” smiled at that. Savanna hauled Aubrey up into her arms and grabbed the car seat and the strap to her suitcase. It didn’t look graceful as she pulled her suitcase, but it got them outside. The day’s heat was fading somewhat, leaving a tiredness in the air. She found a bench against the building where they could sit in the shade.

  A pulsing headache started in her temple, so she closed her eyes but listened to Aubrey’s babbles. What a long, crazy week, but she’d made it through it all for Cassie. She’d been looking for a reason to come home to Oregon, so when she heard that Mike, Cassie’s husband, had died, she quit her job, packed up her apartment, and raced over from Texas.

  All the packing and moving didn’t keep her busy enough to ignore the guilt. She had showed Cassie a fake front the last few years, pretending everything was perfect was it was falling apart. She’d neglected her best friend and the real parts of their lives, but now it seemed like a great time to renew their friendship and focus on someone else’s problems and needs. Maybe she could lose herself in that.

  Aubrey climbed into Savanna’s lap and sang her rendition of “Baa, Baa, Black Sheep” for a minute and then laid her head on Savanna’s shoulder.

  “Getting tired, Bobby Boo? That was a big trip, huh?” She pulled her baby close to hug her chubby little body and then rubbed her back until Aubrey dosed off. Hopefully, her daughter saw all this as a big adventure.

  She wasn’t just worried for Cassie. She was also haunted once again by memories of the fire that had almost taken her life. It’d happened right here in Eugene, shortly before she moved to Texas.

  Poor Cassie. Her husband had been a firefighter, and Savanna wondered if Mike was trying to save someone when he died. Savanna felt sick again, the same sickness she’d felt in that fire as she thought of dying. She couldn’t escape the torture of those memories today or the dread of facing all her old friends again. The truth would come out, whether or not she decided to tell it, because people always ask questions.

  Why on earth did you stay there in Texas? Why didn’t you come home? Why didn’t you at least tell anyone?

  A feeling jarred her into opening her eyes. Sure enough, someone was coming. A man with striking brown eyes walked her way, looking her over. She tried to say Jason to see if he were her ride, but she never heard herself speak. He had a strong face, a square jaw, and a body that looked like he worked out every day.

  His eyes and mouth were familiar, but how could that be? The firefighter? His T-shirt fit snugly, and its forest-green color made his eyes look a deep, deep brown.

  Since Aubrey still slept on her shoulder, she had to tilt her head back to look up at him as he stopped in front of her.

  “Savanna Stauffer?” His low voice resonated in her ears. Yes, the same voice, and here she was, staring up at him like an idiot for a second time.

  “Yes.” Oops, that was her first lie here. For a second she thought she should tell him her name wasn’t Stauffer anymore, but the words stayed inside her head. “This is Aubrey.”

  His face had been so clear in her mind during the last two and a half years. This man had saved her life . . . and filled her dreams with his intense and focused eyes. Of course, there wasn’t any telling how many people he had pulled from burning buildings. It was silly to think that he’d remember her.

  He offered his hand. “Jason Lancaster.”

  She finally knew his name. Now she just needed to think of something, anything, to say. She managed to get her hand out there and found he had a firm handshake that ended quickly.

  He studied her, up and down, with a quizzical face. Boy, it was a great day to be sweaty and dirty. He turned the same questioning look up at the building’s sign. “You rented a truck for the trip?”

  She nodded but didn’t offer anything more.

  “Didn’t want to tow your car?” He put his hands in the pockets of his jeans and rested a foot on the bench as if he planned to stay a few minutes.

  “I sold it to pay for the truck.” She looked out at the road instead of him. “The engine needed work anyway.”

  He seemed to notice her mood then. “Tammy asked me to come get you.”

  “Tammy Clareborn? That’s who answered Cassie’s phone?” She was too tired to think straight but wondered if Tammy were still around and still friends with Cassie. Tammy hadn’t like Savanna all that much.

  “I think that’s her last name. You know her?”

  “We went to high school together.” Savanna sighed. “She was friends with Cassie, but we didn’t get along.” Tammy had called Savanna “Little Miss Pageant Queen” more than a few times. Savanna had never understood why it annoyed other people if she had big dreams. She had planned on going places, being someone. Funny how that one turned out.

  “Are you all right?” Jason sat down next to her and sagged back against the bench.

  “I’m sorry, just tired from driving over here . . . worrying about Cassie . . . wondering what I’m going to do.” The last part slipped out. “Sorry, I’m tired.” She gave an apologetic laugh.

  “Then let’s get you to Cassie’s house.” He took her suitcase and Aubrey’s car seat from by her feet. In the process, he let his gaze linger on Aubrey. “Cute kid.”

  Savanna stood and the movement woke Aubrey. Jason turned and started toward the parking lot, so she took long strides to catch up with him. “Jason?”

  He slowed his pace.

  “You don’t recognize me?” She switched Aubrey to the other hip. Why didn’t he say anything?

  Jason glanced at her, right into her eyes, and looked like he read her mind. Then he glanced down at her hand on Aubrey’s back. When his brows creased, she remembered she’d taken off her wedding ring. A year ago, actually, when Eric asked her to give it back to him, ending their marriage before they even hit their first anniversary. .

  Without answering, he turned and led the way toward the parking lot. She realized he was headed to a red jeep. Jason glanced back at her to say, “I hope this is okay. The wind’s not bad at all in the backseat.”

  Savanna hesitated and then decided to give it a try. Aubrey’s car seat faced the back anyway, so the wind wouldn’t be directly on her. “Sure, I think it’ll be fine.” Jason lifted the car seat to put it in, so she offered, “I can do that.”

  “That’s all right.” He buckled down the car seat base and then let her settle Aubrey into her seat. “Hi there, Aubrey. I’m Jason.”

  “Gase?”

  “Close enough, cutie. Want to go for a fun ride?”

  Savanna almost caught his smile before he turned around. Instead she saw just the profile of it.

  Soon they were driving, and a light breeze cooled them between stoplights. Despite her weariness and the circumstances, she felt invigorated. Her hair danced in the breeze. As they accelerated from a stop, Jason called out, “Aubrey, having fun back there?”

  Little-girl squeals of delight answered back. It hit Savanna that she’d never ridden in a jeep either. She glanced at its owner, curious about him and what he must think about her. This sure was every girl’s dream: A tall, dark, and handsome man picked her up, and she was a sweaty mess. He glanced over, and she had the horrified thought that she’d actually said that out loud.

  “So, how do you know Cassie?” she asked, and memories swamped back into her mind as she spoke. Cassie had mentioned Mike’s friend, Jason, during their phone calls, come to think of it. Cassie had shared about her life while Savanna had fabricated hers.

  “We’ve been good friends a few years now, eve
r since she met Mike. He and I go way back.”

  “Oh, right, because you’re both—” Firefighters. Why couldn’t she tell when to quit?

  If his appearance said anything, they must have been close. She could see dark circles around his eyes, and he needed a shave, but that part looked good on him. “I still can’t believe it,” she said, referring to Mike. Maybe he needed to talk about it. She glanced over. Nope. His jaw muscles worked, and it made him look mad. Now she was sorry she’d spoken. When he didn’t answer, it confirmed her thoughts.

  He glanced at her through dark sunglasses, the wind teasing his hair. It looked like he glared at her, but she attributed it to his mood.

  “So, are you planning to stay with Cassie a while?”

  “As long as she needs me.”

  “That’s good. She needs someone there with her.” He drummed the wheel. She rolled her neck and then settled back into the seat. Every time she blinked, her life changed. The unexpected trip home, and now him. He gave off a controlled energy, an intensity that yelled out of his silence.

  Her old hometown slid past. She had missed Oregon’s green summers that weren’t too hot. She loved the hills, the tall evergreens and the clear, cold rivers. Eugene was a university town, but not like others she had visited. It was busy with business traffic, Oregon Duck fans, hippies and crowds of shoppers coming in from the surrounding hundred-mile radius.

  “How is Cassie?” She was afraid to know but she also needed to prepare.

  “She’s mad.” His voice sounded low, controlled.

  “Mad?”

  He sighed and brushed the hair back from his temple. “Mike and Cassie had a lot of plans. Now he’s gone. She blames the fire department. Me. Mostly me.”

  His sudden honesty took Savanna by surprise. “Emotions are running wild right now,” she said, “Maybe she’s venting.”