Andy Roid and the Avalanche of Evil

by Felice Arena

‘The other driver must have doubled back and picked up the shop clerk,’ shouted Andy.

  ‘That was awesome,’ Judd yelled.

  ‘Can’t be in the snow and not have a snowball fight,’ Andy shouted over the sound of the snowmobile engine. ‘You weren’t too bad yourself. So, what do we do now?’

  ‘We try to lose them, that’s what! Hang on!’

  Judd revved the vehicle to full capacity and accelerated up over a ridge.

  The bright spring skies were now filled with dark grey clouds. The weather was getting worse every minute. The light fluttering of snow had turned into a thick snowfall.

  ‘It’s hard to see where I’m going,’ Judd cried, spitting out flakes of snow. ‘It’s going to be a blizzard before long. Are they still behind us?’

  Andy looked back into a wall of whiteness. ‘I can’t see them,’ he shouted. ‘But I can still hear them. They’re close. Maybe we should try another round of snowball fire.’

  BANG! BANG! BANG!

  ‘They’re shooting at us,’ yelled Judd.

  BANG! BANG! BANG!

  ‘If we can’t see them, how can they see us?’ Andy hollered back.

  ‘It’s called potluck, dude! Just shoot and hope you hit something. Use your laser finger! Shoot back!’

  Andy didn’t answer. Sooner or later he might need to take someone’s life to save his own. He hoped it wouldn’t be today.

  But then he was distracted by a strange sound. It was a low rumbling, coming from further up the mountain.

  ‘Judd,’ he cried. ‘Listen!’

  ‘To what?’ said Judd. ‘What is it?’

  CRACK!

  The sound continued to get louder and Andy’s face dropped as he worked out what it was.

  RUUUUUMBLE

  ‘AVALANCHE!’ he cried. ‘The shooting triggered an avalanche! Turn around! Around!’

  But it was too late. A large powdery cloud was roaring down the slope towards the boys.

  Judd turned the snowmobile sharply and zoomed past the two men just as they saw the avalanche coming. The clerk looked terrified.

  Andy looked back and saw their snowmobile vanish in a white wall of snow and ice.

  ‘NOOOOO!’ he yelled. ‘It’s already caught up with –’

  But it was the last thing Andy said before he felt the world tip upside down. Everything suddenly went dark and silent.

  Frightened, Andy could hear his heart beating as he tried to make sense of what had happened.

  Struggling to breathe, he felt as if someone had just dropped a twenty-ton snowball directly on top of him.

  The avalanche! It covered us before we could get away, Andy thought. And now we’re buried alive.

  Andy’s survival instincts immediately kicked in. He knew he had no time to waste. He was in an air pocket, but there was hardly any oxygen and he could lose consciousness at any second.

  He had to dig himself out of an icy grave.

  With his acute hearing he could hear the slabs of snow settling above him – and that’s the direction he dug towards.

  With his almighty bionic strength, Andy scooped his way out, and soon he could see light shining through the snow.

  ‘YES! I’m free!’ he gasped, as he broke through the surface.

  Then he realised something terrible.

  ‘Judd,’ he said, turning back and digging as fast as he could. He hoped that Judd hadn’t been thrown too far from the buried snowmobile.

  Finally, he spotted Judd’s jacket.

  When Andy dug the snow away from Judd, he saw that his friend wasn’t moving and his lips were blue.

  Andy dragged him up to the surface. Judd didn’t seem to be breathing.

  ‘I’m too late!’ Andy panicked.

  He started CPR, which he had learnt as a part of his agent training.

  ‘Please, please don’t die,’ he repeated, as he pushed on Judd’s chest.

  Andy had tears in his eyes and was shaking all over as he blew short sharp breaths into Judd’s lungs. He had to save his friend. He couldn’t lose him.

  ‘Come on!’ he cried. ‘You’ve gotta come back! You need to see your mum again! Breathe!’

  Suddenly Judd began to cough and splutter.

  Tears of relief streamed down Andy’s cheeks.

  ‘You’re gonna be okay, Judd,’ he said, as Judd opened his eyes.

  ‘Thanks,’ said Judd weakly, as he struggled to sit up. ‘Appreciate the help, but next time you’ve got to bring me back from the dead, dude, could you have a mint first?’

  ● ● ●

  ‘It’s finished!’ Andy grinned, and wiped falling snow out of his eyes.

  Judd shivered. ‘That’s it?’

  ‘Give me a break,’ Andy said. ‘It’s the first igloo I’ve ever made. I know it’s not the best-looking shelter, but it has air holes and everything. Where else are we going to take cover for the night?’

  ‘But I almost checked out for good in the snow,’ said Judd. ‘And now you want me to go back under there? Talk about mixed messages, dude.’

  ‘Just shut up and get in before you freeze to death – I’ll go and get some wood to make a fire.’

  When Andy returned and crawled into the igloo, he immediately activated his hotplate app, and made a fire with the broken tree branches he had collected.

  ‘You sure that’s not going to melt this icebox down?’ Judd asked, crouched up, trying to keep warm.

  ‘Geez,’ Andy said. ‘I just saved your scrawny butt and now you’re laying it on me?’

  ‘Sorry, fair call,’ Judd said. ‘So how intense was that avalanche? I did not see that coming. I reckon those snowmobile dudes didn’t make it out alive. But even if they did, they’ll report back to the Blaireau that we didn’t make it.’

  ‘So we’re still going ahead with this?’ said Andy.

  He wanted to rescue Judd’s mum, but he was worried about how Judd was going to react when he came across the men who had kidnapped her.

  ‘Don’t you think we should call in the General for help?’ he said.

  ‘No,’ snapped Judd. ‘If we make contact with the Agency, they’ll come in and get us. And I won’t wait at home and leave my mum’s rescue up to someone else. I’d never forgive myself if something went wrong and I lost her all over again. We’re so close. And we can do this. We’ll be okay, I promise.’

  Andy sighed. Famous last words, he thought.

  ● ● ●

  ‘Morning!’ Judd said as Andy crawled out of the igloo.

  He squinted at the bright sunlight – the snowstorm had passed and it was a clear blue-sky day.

  Judd was sitting outside, gazing at the view. The light bouncing off the snow made it glisten and sparkle as if diamonds had been scattered everywhere.

  Andy noticed his palm was flashing red. He had a message.

  ‘Andy, it’s me,’ said the holographic image of Reggie hovering over Andy’s palm. ‘I can’t hold out any longer. The General is demanding I tell him every-thing I know about your whereabouts and what’s going on. I’m not a very good liar so it didn’t take much for him to figure out I was withholding information. He’s threatened to kick me out of the Agency if I don’t tell him by the end of the day. I’m sorry. I don’t want to lose this job, and I want you and Judd to be safe. You can’t do this alone any more. You need help.’

  Reggie’s holographic message zapped off.

  ‘Right!’ Judd said, standing up. ‘Let’s get back on track and find my mum. We’ve gotta get moving. The General will send out a team as soon as Reggie blabs. It’s lucky we’ve already got a good head start.’

  ‘Yeah, lucky,’ Andy muttered.

  ‘I’m starving,’ groaned Judd as he trudged through the snow. ‘My sneakers are soaking wet and my feet are so cold. I wish we hadn’t dumped those snowshoes.’

  For hours, Andy had been using his sensitive hearing and sight to detect a chalet or a building that might be used to hold Judd’s mum prisoner. It was taking a long time and
they had a lot of ground to cover. Occasionally he would jump up into the trees to look for anything strange.

  ‘I could run,’ said Andy. ‘You know I could piggyback you. We don’t need to be hiking like this. Stop being stubborn. You’re the one who said we have no time to waste.’

  ‘Fine,’ Judd huffed, jumping on Andy’s back. ‘So embarrassing. . .Hang on – what’s that? Look!’

  Andy looked up to see a group of animals perched on a high cliff. They were glaring down at them.

  ‘What are they?’ Judd asked.

  ‘Hold on, I’ll try using my IRS app,’ said Andy, extending his right palm towards the animals. He took a photo with the camera just at the base of his middle finger.

  Seconds later, a page came up on his hand screen.

  The Chamois

  A member of the goat–antelope species native to mountains in Europe. A fully grown male grows to a height of 80–90 cm. Both males and females have short, straight horns that are hooked backward near the tip.

  ‘Huh?’ said Judd, still holding on to Andy’s back. ‘It looks like a deer dressed as a goat.’

  ‘Let’s take a closer look,’ said Andy, catching Judd off guard and springing upwards.

  ‘WOOOOOAAAAHHHH!’ Judd cried, as Andy launched himself onto the ridge where the chamois stood. ‘Dude, warn me next time you’re going to get all hyper-kangaroo on me.’

  The chamois stepped back, but continued to stare at the boys intently.

  ‘Why are they giving us freaky dagger looks?’ Judd asked, hopping off Andy. ‘They don’t look happy. Are they dangerous?’

  Andy continued reading from his screen. ‘It says here they’re vegetarians and they’re usually timid and frightened by humans.’

  ‘RAAARRRGHH!’ Judd roared, and the chamois immediately bolted into the woods.

  ‘Yep, you’re right,’ he said, laughing. ‘They’re chickens.’

  Andy grinned. ‘It also says that chamois meat is a delicacy. You could’ve had roasted goat.’

  ‘No, thanks,’ Judd said. ‘I might be starving, but I’d like my food on a plate and preferably crumbed.’

  But Andy barely heard Judd’s last comment, as something had caught his attention. Out of the shadowy woods, one after another, a whole army of chamois was walking towards them. Each animal had that same scary, intent look on its face.

  ‘No way,’ Andy said.

  ‘Whoa!’ Judd gulped. ‘There’s about twenty of them.’

  The animals were lining up side by side, slowly surrounding them.

  ‘Let’s just leave quietly,’ Andy whispered. ‘No sudden movements, nice and easy.’

  The chamois lowered their heads and pointed their horns at them. But Andy had noticed something even more frightening.

  ‘I don’t think these are ordinary animals,’ he said. ‘Look at their eyes. They’re glowing red – just like the hummingbird’s eyes. That’s not good.’

  Before Andy could say another word, the entire herd started grunting and snorting and charging at them.

  ‘RUUUUUUNNNNNN!’ Judd cried, as Andy swung into hyper-bionic action, grabbing him and leaping into the treetops.

  Andy landed on a large branch several metres above the ground, and Judd quickly grabbed at the tree trunk.

  THHHHOOMMMP!

  The chamois were relentless. They head-butted and rammed the trunk of the tree.

  They continued to charge until the tree was swaying violently, nearly shaking Judd out of the branches.

  ‘These goats are nuts,’ he puffed. ‘They’re friggin’ psychotic. They’re trying to knock us down. . .’ Then suddenly he grinned.

  ‘What?’ said Andy. ‘There’s nothing to smile about.’

  ‘There is,’ said Judd. ‘It must mean we’re close to where they’re holding my mum. I bet these things are designed to act like guard dogs that blend into the landscape. That’s genius. . .pure evil genius.’

  Andy looked from side to side, trying to find some sign of a building or evidence that people lived close by. Then he saw it. ‘Over there – through the trees,’ he said.

  ‘Dude, I can’t see a thing,’ Judd said. ‘I don’t have bionic vision. What is it?’

  ‘There’s a building at the base of a cliff. It’s not a chalet – it’s more modern, with hardly any windows. I think we just found where the Blaireau are keeping your mum.’

  ‘We’ve gotta get there now,’ said Judd.

  ‘Um. . .we’ve got a small problem,’ said Andy, looking down at the herd of angry chamois. ‘Or maybe not so small.’ ‘Don’t worry, dude.’ Judd grinned again. ‘This time I’ve got a plan!’

  ● ● ●

  ‘They’re either bionic or robotic and they might run just as fast as you do or even faster,’ said Judd. ‘You could jump us both out, but they’d follow us. And, even if we lost them, the Blaireau know where we’re going. They’ll just head for the building. We need the element of surprise.’

  ‘So how do we get that?’ asked Andy.

  ‘We get close to the building, then you throw me and get them to chase you. You distract them, outrun them, destroy them, whatever. And I’ll go save my mum.’

  Andy sighed. ‘Are you totally mad? If I throw you, how are you going to land without hurting yourself?’

  ‘Dude, take it down a notch. I’ve had extensive stuntman training and with all this fresh snow, I should have a nice soft landing when you toss me.’

  ‘All right,’ Andy said reluctantly. ‘It’s nuts, but I can’t think of anything better. We’ll have to move fast before anything happens to your mum.’

  Judd nodded.

  ‘I’m enabling GPS tracking so the General can find us,’ said Andy. ‘I don’t care what you say. We need help.’

  The chamois were getting increasingly agitated. They were jumping over each other to bang their heads against the tree.

  ‘We better do it now,’ Judd said panicking and nearly losing his grip on the branch. ‘This tree is going to topple over any second. GO!’

  Andy grabbed Judd and jumped.

  For a second he thought the animals wouldn’t notice. He sailed over the trees and landed much closer to the building. Then, in the distance, he saw the chamois turn and race towards them. They were frighteningly fast.

  ‘You sure you want me to do this?’ Andy said.

  ‘Dude, there’s no going back now, just aim for that big lump of snow over there.’

  Andy hurled Judd feet first, as if he were tossing a javelin. He watched him land and then turned to face the chamois.

  The creatures slowed as they approached, snorting angrily.

  ‘That’s it, come and get me!’ Andy yelled.

  From the corner of his eye, Andy saw Judd run for the building. He seemed okay.

  ‘Catch me if you can, chamois!’ Andy cried.

  He turned and bolted. Judd’s crazy plan seemed to have worked so far. The animals charged at Andy as he ran into the woods.

  Andy hoped that Judd could handle himself for a while against whatever was waiting for him in the building.

  The chase was on.

  WHHOOOSSSHH

  Andy ripped his way through the snow, kicking up a blizzard of ice behind him. He was flooring it. But so were the chamois. In fact, they were gaining on him.

  No way! Andy thought, cranking it up a gear.

  Andy’s iris-speedometer had been activated and was now projecting figures across his field of vision – 42km/h, 54km/h, 63km/h, 71km/h, 78km/h. . .

  Soon Andy had broken his record speed of 108km/h, but that was still not fast enough to outrun the chamois. They were only a couple of metres behind him and their horns were dangerously close.

  Andy had no choice but to jump up into the safety of another tree.

  He took a deep breath. He had to get back to help Judd, but the chamois were much too fast for him.

  Are they robotic or bionic? he wondered desperately. He had no way of knowing that, but he did know that if it was a cho
ice between Judd and the chamois, Judd would win.

  Andy just had to hope he could take twenty of them out at once.

  He jumped over the herd and landed with a crunch in the snow.

  He turned and reluctantly raised his laser finger, but suddenly another laser beam shot through the woods and hit one of the chamois.

  KAA-BOOOMM!!

  The chamois exploded in a blast of smoke and heat.

  ‘What the?’ said Andy.

  The chamois charged, and before Andy could work out where the unseen help was coming from, another red laser beam shot out of the woods.

  KAA-BOOOMM!!

  ‘Whoa!’ Andy yelled as a second chamois exploded into a million flying parts.

  Andy’s heart was pounding. They’re combustible or powered by some explosive gas, he thought. They’re robotic!

  ‘Well, that’s a little bit awesome,’ he said. ‘It’s my turn now.’

  Andy activated his laser finger and took aim.

  ZAAAAAPPPPP!

  KAA-BOOOMM!!

  Fiery clumps of mechanical limbs, springs and wires spun and whirled like fireworks as Andy fired his laser.

  The battle had turned into a real-life video game.

  KAA-BOOOMM!!

  ‘Take that!’ he yelled.

  KAA-BOOOMM!!

  ‘And that!’

  KAA-BOOOMM!!

  But the chamois weren’t backing down. They continued to storm towards Andy, and before he knew what was happening, they had surrounded him.

  ‘So that’s how you want to play?’ he said as the remaining ten chamois charged at him from every angle. ‘Time to get physical!’

  THOOOOMP! POW! THWACK!

  Andy let loose with a combination of powerful windmill kicks and deadly strike punches.

  THWACK!

  He catapulted the mechanical beasts into the sky, one after the other.

  POW! POW! POW!

  But as soon as they hit the ground, they sprang back onto their feet and advanced again.

  They were dead silent as they marched forward. It was seriously freaky.

  ‘Stubborn robotic critters of evil,’ Andy said. ‘Well, if it’s a boom-boom encore you want – you got it!’

  Just as the chamois were about to ram into Andy, he soared for the sky. Leaping higher that he’d ever leapt before, Andy hung in midair like a skateboarder executing a classic frontside 180.