by R. E. Hunter
He only hesitated for a split second before gripping her hips and lifting her to sit on the edge of the pool table. Pushing between her legs, he leaned in until their lips were nearly touching. “I think,” he said, tracing a stray hair down the side of her face and pushing it behind her ear, “that it’s going to take some more wining and dining for you to hear my suggestions.”
Chills broke out across her skin as her body reacted to his words. “There was wine tonight,” she whispered against his lips.
“It’s a start,” he answered. He dragged his hands through her hair, gripping her head as he traced the seam of her lips with his tongue.
Her eyes fluttered shut, her thoughts floating away as Luke continued to tease her, feathering kisses along the corners of her mouth and brushing his lips lightly against hers, but never fully making contact.
An involuntary sigh escaped her lips. “Please.”
“Open your eyes, Embry,” he instructed.
She stared up into hazy pools of dark blue.
“That’s better.” He smiled against her mouth. “Please what, baby?”
She felt as if she’d explode any minute if she didn’t have his mouth on hers. That had been his plan. Make her want it, need it, beg for it. And she loved every second. “Kiss me, please.”
He brought his mouth down on hers, and she moaned in relief. Their tongues tangled, stroking slowly, the feeling causing her stomach to clench deliciously. The man could kiss. She gripped his shirt, pulling him closer and reveling in the feel of his lips on hers, their mouths nipping and teasing, never breaking contact. He dragged his teeth over her bottom lip, tugging on it as he slowly pulled away.
He stared down at her, his eyes soft as he held her, slowly stroking his thumb back and forth against the sensitive skin on her neck. “Let’s go downstairs,” he suggested, his jaw clenching with restraint.
She drew back, confused. “Downstairs?”
“I promised I’d be a gentleman,” he said, eyes blazing. “But I can’t do that when I’m thinking about all the things I want to do to you on my pool table.”
His hands tightened on her involuntarily, and she realized he was doing his best to restrain himself and stick to his promise to take it slow. It pulled on her heartstrings that he was trying so hard for her. And as much as she wanted to hear about all of the ideas he had for the pool table, in detail, she knew it would be best to wait. If there were more kisses like that to look forward to, it would be totally worth it.
He helped her from the pool table, holding her hand as he led her from the room. “But what about our bet?” She pouted.
“To be continued,” he said on a wink.
Embry let out a frustrated huff as she stared down at her phone, the alert notification flashing with five new text messages.
“We can do this another time,” Jeremy said sharply.
“No, no, it’s fine.” She was getting ready to meet Morgan, Brett and Luke for dinner and a movie, when he’d shown up at her door. She typed out a quick response in their group chat and brought her attention back to her friend. She’d promised him they’d talk, but she hadn’t realized how serious he’d take it.
“Drink?” Embry offered.
“Sure.”
She grabbed a beer for Jeremy and a bottle of water for herself before sitting down opposite him on the couch. “So, what’s up?” She tried to sound light, but failed miserably. Lately, things between them had been tense at best, and although she’d rather avoid the whole thing, it seemed as if he couldn’t leave it alone any longer.
Jeremy ran a rough hand through his hair, his big brown eyes focused intently on her. “Things are… weird between us.”
“They are,” she agreed, nervously picking at the label on her water bottle.
“I know you and Morgan have tried to avoid the topic around me,” he said, his jaw tightening. “But what’s happening with you and Luke?”
Embry squirmed uncomfortably, not answering.
“Are you…” he hesitated, his expression pained. “Back together?”
“We’re… trying,” she answered awkwardly. “Look, Jer—”
He held up a hand, looking pained. “No, please just let me get this out.”
“Okay.” She folded her hands in her lap, attempting to calm her frayed nerves.
“I know how you feel about him. I’m not stupid. And I hate this. Hate it,” he said, wincing. “Because I already know the outcome. But if I don’t say this, I’ll never forgive myself.”
Dread flooded her veins as tears bit at the backs of her eyes. Don’t say it, Jer. Please, don’t say it.
“I love you, Embry.” His eyes blazed into hers. “I’m in love with you.”
Her heart stuttered, then stopped in her chest.
“If there’s even a small part of you that feels the same way…” He trailed off.
She sat in stunned silence, fighting to keep her face blank and losing the battle. The last thing she wanted was for him to see any guilt or pity there. It would break him. But it was all she felt. She loved him, adored him—as a friend. He was attractive, intelligent, hilariously engaging; he was her Jer. But her feelings went no further than friendship. Like he’d said on the day they met, it was strictly platonic. He was an amazing friend, always looking out for her and constantly making her laugh, but he didn’t make her feel like Luke did. Her heart never felt as if it would thump out of her chest when he walked into a room. Her knees never went weak when he touched her. He couldn’t read her, know exactly what she needed with just a look. And maybe, had things been different, had Luke never entered into the picture, she could have—would have—fallen for Jeremy. But things weren’t different. They were exactly the same as they’d always been. And her heart wasn’t budging when it came to her feelings for Luke, even if her head was screaming that it should.
“Say something,” he pleaded, his words scattering her thoughts.
“I don’t—I think,” she fumbled for words then gave up, letting out a long sigh. “Jer, I don’t know what to say.” She looked at him through sad eyes. “I don’t want to hurt you and I don’t want to lose you.”
“But,” he said, leaving the air thick with bitterness.
“But nothing. I don’t want to hurt you and I don’t want to lose you,” she repeated, matter-of-factly.
“And that’s it.” His eyes were hard as he searched her face.
She nodded. “That’s it, Jer. I love him. I can’t unlove him. I can’t change my heart. I have to see this through.”
“Friend-zoned,” he mumbled, glancing away.
She left it alone, having nothing to say in response.
“How does he do it, Bree? I get it, he has the southern thing going for him.” He rolled his eyes. “But he’s done nothing but cause you pain. He’s a liar. Instead of manning up and telling you the truth, he ran away from it, hid it at all costs until it came out on its own and hurt you worse than if he’d told you himself. Twice.”
She flinched at his words, but how could she argue? It was true. Mostly. Luke had brought so much to her life, made her happy in ways she’d never thought she could be, but he’d also caused the most pain. And she kept coming back for more.
“I don’t know, Jer,” she responded weakly. She felt like a broken record. How did she explain to him all the reasons why she didn’t love him, or why her heart had chosen someone else? “He’s made some big mistakes, you’re right.” But she wasn’t perfect either, and Luke had never held her faults over her head.
“I could make you happy,” he offered quietly, a trace of desperation in his voice. “No secrets, no lies.”
He probably could, she thought to herself, if she’d let him. But sitting there, confronted with the possibility of losing one of her best friends, she still didn’t feel the least bit torn. Her heart knew what it wanted. It always had. And it wasn’t Jeremy.
She looked up at him, her eyes pleading. “Don’t make me choose between my relationship with Luke
and our friendship, Jeremy. I don’t want to do that. You mean too much to me.”
“I won’t make you choose,” he said gently.
Relief washed over her. She didn’t want to lose her friend.
Jeremy set his beer down on the table and stood.
“Where are you going?”
He shrugged, emotion shining in his eyes. “I’m choosing for you, Embry.”
“You what?” She stood, looking up at him in question.
“I can’t be your back up anymore.”
“My backup?” Her throat tightened. What was he talking about?
He stared down at her, his jaw set. “I can’t be there for you when things are rough with him, which I can guarantee they will be again, and then have you brush me aside as soon as he charms his way back into your life. I can’t do it anymore.”
“But—I—” She took a deep breath and tried again. “You’re not my backup, Jer, you’re my friend.”
He swallowed thickly, his sad eyes trained on hers. “I’m having a hard time being your friend right now.”
His words knocked the air right out of her, an emotional punch to the gut. She sat back on the couch, staring at him in disbelief through the cloud of tears in her eyes.
“I’m sorry, Bree.” He sent her a long, pained look before turning away.
“Me too,” she said quietly.
She watched the door close behind him, and a sob broke free from her chest. It was all too much. The stress of school, trying to make things work with Luke, and now she was losing one of her closest friends. She hated how she’d left things with Jeremy. Hated that they’d had to have the conversation at all. She never wanted to see her friend hurt, especially not when she was the cause.
Brushing the tears away, she forced herself to calm and pulled herself together. There was no way she could meet Luke, Morgan and Brett. Not when she couldn’t even manage a happy face. Opening the group chat, she typed out a quick excuse about not feeling well and cancelled her plans.
He’s a liar.
Jeremy’s voice still hung heavy in the air around her. He hadn’t said anything she didn’t already know, but hearing it from someone else made her feel naked, vulnerable… exposed. It toyed with her, played tricks on her mind, brought out every uncertainty she had about giving her heart to him again.
Her phone rang in her hand, Luke’s number flashing on the screen. She had the overwhelming desire to ignore the call. Every feeling she’d struggled with over the past few weeks—doubt, confusion, mistrust—were now rushing back. It wasn’t Luke’s fault. Rationally, she knew that. But she wasn’t feeling very rational.
She answered on the last possible ring, knowing he wouldn’t give up. “Hey.”
“You all right?” The concern in his voice did nothing to soothe her.
She sighed heavily. “I’m fine.”
“Are you sick?”
“No. I just didn’t want to go out.” She mentally slapped herself, knowing she was being rude for no reason at all, but she couldn’t help it. Jeremy had just brought out all of her insecurities, eroding the fragile foundation that she and Luke had been working so hard to rebuild.
“What’s got you all salty?” he asked, innocently enough.
She frowned at the floor, burrowing deeper into the comfort of the couch. “Salty?”
“Yes, beautiful. Cranky. Pissed off. Not happy.”
She knew exactly what it meant. “Nothing, I’m fine.”
“That’s the second time you’ve said that in two minutes.”
“I just had a bad day.” It was a weak excuse and she knew it.
“Why don’t I come over and make it a bit better, then?” he suggested, carefully maneuvering around her bad mood.
“What makes you think you can?” she quipped.
“I just have a feeling.”
She pictured him standing in his kitchen, his handsome, cocky face grinning into the phone, and a small crack formed in her solid exterior. “I just kind of wanted to be alone,” she answered, a bit nicer this time.
“You’re making it hard for me to wine and dine you, sweetheart,” he joked, obviously trying to lighten things up.
“Try harder then,” she shot back.
“I need to up my game, huh?”
She smiled despite herself. “I guess so.”
His deep chuckle came through the phone. “You asked for it.”
“Asked for what?”
Silence.
“Hello?” She looked at the phone and saw that he’d disconnected.
Cocky bastard!
Embry was snuggled up on the couch, nursing a cup of tea and watching her go-to bad-day movie when a knock sounded on her door. She knew it was coming. There was no way Luke was going to just leave her alone after their exchange on the phone.
She felt her lips curl into a half smile. She was still upset, still unsure, but he was making it as hard as possible for her to push him away.
Pulling open the door, she found him standing in the hallway, holding up two big brown bags, a broad smile across his face. “I brought reinforcements.”
She stood aside to let him in. He dropped a kiss on her cheek as he walked by. Glancing toward the movie paused on the TV, he gave her a mock sad face.
“Pretty Woman? Ouch. It must’ve been a really bad day,” he teased.
She rolled her eyes and followed him as he walked into the kitchen.
“I didn’t know what kind of situation we were dealing with here.” He smiled sympathetically as he unpacked the bags, pulling things out one at a time. “So I got a bit of everything. Mac n’ cheese, obviously. Chubby hubby.” He set both containers on the counter. “Chicken soup. Cookies. Bagels, cream cheese.”
Embry raised an eyebrow. “Bagels and cream cheese?”
He shrugged. “You New Yorkers love your bagels.” Snacks and comfort food piled up on her counter until Luke reached the bottom of the bag. Pulling out a small pink box, he handed it to her cautiously. “Pamprin?”
Embry’s mouth dropped open. She grabbed the box and threw it at him. “Seriously?”
He cupped her neck, pulling her against his chest as he let out a low chuckle.
“You’re a dick,” she mumbled against his shirt.
Loosening his grip, he let her wiggle out of his arms. Her bad mood was thawing as she inspected the goodies. He’d gone above and beyond, out of his way when she’d told him she wasn’t having a good day. It was nearly impossible to reconcile this Luke with the one who’d kept such harmful secrets.
“Oh, come on,” he insisted, coming up behind her and gripping her waist. “It was kind of brilliant.”
She rolled her eyes. “You’ve got balls. I’ll give you that much.”
“I think we covered that one already.” He bent to place a kiss on her neck, but she pulled out of his grasp avoiding the contact.
“I just wanted to make you smile, Embry,” he said, his voice laced with disappointment.
“I know,” she said, not trusting her own thoughts or feelings at the moment. “I’m not sure I feel like smiling right now.”
“Want to talk about it?” He gently trailed a finger down her face, his eyes filled with concern.
Embry shook her head and made her way back to the couch. She pressed play on the movie, buying herself more time, but she knew she’d have to open up eventually.
Luke busied himself putting away the rest of the groceries and left Embry to finish her movie. He’d planned to wait her out, until she grew restless and had to tell him what was bothering her, but he was getting antsy himself. They’d spoken all day through text, and she’d never given a single hint as to something being wrong. He couldn’t figure out what had changed.
He sat down beside her, grabbing the remote and turning off the TV. “All right. Enough.”
Her jade eyes shot to him. “What?”
“Tell me what’s going on.” He knew it was more than just a bad day.
Embry shook her head. “
I don’t want to get into it.”
“Too bad,” he shot back. He had a lot to atone for, he knew that. But if this was going to work—the second time around—they had to play by the same rules, which meant she had to give him the truth as much as he had to give it to her. “We’re in this together, right? Good, bad or ugly. Just tell me the truth.”
“That’s funny, you demanding the truth,” she muttered.
Luke reared back as if he’d been slapped. Ouch. “Is that it, then? Did I piss you off somehow? Or did something else happen? Push me away all you want, Embry. I’m not going anywhere.”
She stared at him in steely silence.
“Fine,” he said, frustrated with the silent treatment. “I’ll save you the time. I lied. I fucked us up. I hurt you and ruined the best thing that ever happened to me.” He looked up, mentally tallying his fuck ups. “Did I miss anything?”
She flinched slightly but made no move to respond.
Rubbing a hand over his neck, Luke tried again. “Look, I’m sorry,” he said gently. “I know we’re not on solid ground yet, but I thought you were past being so angry with me. I can’t fix it if you won’t tell me what happened.”
He sat silently by, waiting for her to speak. When she finally did, her voice was quiet, meek. “I saw Jeremy today.”
Luke nodded. She saw Jeremy every day, that wasn’t anything new.
“He came over right before I was supposed to meet you.”
That got Luke’s attention. He clenched his fists in his lap at the thought of Jeremy being the cause of her bad mood.
“He…” She sighed heavily. “He told me he loves me.” Her sad eyes found Luke’s. “That he’s in love with me.”
Luke sucked in a deliberate breath, hoping to quiet the pounding in his ears. She was clearly hurting; the last thing she needed was his anger. “Do you—” he gritted his teeth, fighting to get the words out “—feel the same?”
She shook her head vehemently. “You know I don’t.”
He waited for her to continue.
