The Defiance (Brilliant Darkness)

by A. G. Henley

  He's probably waiting for me to start my work in the caves. The obvious response is for me to refuse. I should go home and lock myself in. Or stay all day in the clearing where he can't possibly touch me. But inside the caves is the safest place to talk with Peree.

  Moray follows me as I head that direction, struggling with what to do. I can't go in with him. That would be insane. Maybe if we were outside, Peree would see us and guess what's happening. I stop in front of the entrance and, hands on hips, turn to Moray. My fingers burn, wanting to dip into my pocket where Peree's knife lurks. I'm feeling pretty happy he insisted I keep it with me after the Reckoning.

  "The Three want you to keep an eye on me. Fine. But let's get one thing straight: if you put anything else on me, I'll tell everyone about your Lofty friend. I mean it. If even one finger strays where it doesn't belong, I'll spill my guts." I wince at my own choice of words. Yeah, I'm real scary.

  "Ouch, Fennel. That hurts," he says with no trace of emotion in his voice, unless you count sarcasm. "How will I ever live it down if you tell everyone my little secret?"

  My lips form a thin smile, as thin as the blade of my hidden knife. "Look at how people are treating Peree and me—and we're trying to do things the right way. No one will take it well that you messed around with a Lofty girl. Especially your mother, with all her talk about Lofty lovers. Gives that term a new meaning doesn't it?"

  Moray comes so close I can feel the warmth of his overly muscled body. This is stupid; he’s much stronger than me. Fighting Moray would be like a mouse taking on a hawk. Sweat trickles down my back.

  "You're hot when you're threatening me. Know that, sweetheart?"

  My hand dives into my pocket, tugging out the knife. I step back and hold it between us. "Back off, Moray. I mean it."

  "Okay, now you're trying to turn me on." He plucks the knife out of my hand. "Sorry, but I can't let you keep this. Might have an accident and cut off one of your pretty little body parts. Don't play the tough girl, Fenn; it's not your style."

  I'm dismayed that he disarmed me so easily. At the same time I realize his voice has changed a little. It's warmer than usual, and he actually used my real name. Maybe I disarmed him a little, too. I hold up my hands.

  "Convince me I don't need to worry about being alone with you."

  He snorts. "Get over yourself. I'm not going to touch you. Look—what happened before with us . . . I saw an opportunity. Simple as that." He doesn't sound contrite. He sounds horribly matter-of-fact. "What can I say, sweetheart? We're not all heroes. Deal with it."

  Unbelievable. "How can I be sure you won't see another opportunity?"

  "I told you before. I don't want to come second to Bear. That goes double for a Lofty. And, frankly, you aren't really my type."

  "I’m glad to hear it.” I pause. “I want my knife back.”

  "Nope."

  "I'm only going in there with you if you give it back." Wait, am I really thinking about going in there with him? Have I lost my mind?

  "So demanding. Here you go, then." He slaps it hilt-first into my hand. "It's not like I have anything to worry about. You don't have a clue how to handle a blade. You're more likely to cut your own throat than mine."

  I hate to admit it, but he's probably right. I wave the knife at him anyway. "I'm trusting you."

  He steps in until the solid bulk of his torso meets the sharp tip of the knife. Then he leans even closer, so close that I hear the cloth of his shirt give way with a soft pop.

  He chortles loudly, startling me. "C'mon, sweetheart. Time for you to work and for me to watch you."

  I take a settling breath. There are few things I can trust anymore. My instincts have to be one of them. I pocket the knife and enter the cave behind Moray, hoping I'm not making the worst mistake of my life.

  He’s doubly true to his word. He doesn't touch me . . . and he sits and watches me do all the work.

  I move around the storeroom, cleaning up and preparing the shelves for more supplies after the community's short-but-messy stay. Moray lies around, whistling again. He manages to make the act of blowing air through his lips irritating. I start up a conversation just to get him to stop.

  "So—did you ever talk to your Lofty friend?” I ask. “What did you two decide to do?"

  "None of your business."

  Funny, that's what she said, too. At least he's not whistling now.

  I cast around for another topic of conversation. I really don't know much about him except that he and Bear hate each other’s guts. I never had much to do with Thistle or her family until the last few months.

  "What's your brother's name, Moray? Not Cuda. The other one. I can never remember it."

  "We're being all chummy now? Okay, I'll play. It's Conda."

  "Aren't they doubles?" I teeter on my toes, lifting an unwieldy basket onto a shelf over my head. A little help would be nice, not that I'm expecting to get it.

  "Yep, look exactly the same. Two identical lumps of rock. Almost killed Thistle to push ‘em out. She was bleeding and screaming like a fleshie."

  Dust trails from the shelf into my upturned eyes. I stop to rub them. "You remember that? How old were you?"

  "About five."

  "You must have been scared. Where was your father?"

  "Inside a bottle, probably. That's where he usually was."

  I vaguely remember Thistle's partner. His voice was husky and loud; it frightened me. Come to think of it, he did smell like alcohol a lot. He died a few years ago. "Do you miss him?"

  "What's to miss?"

  I wish I could say I hear a pause, or a note of vulnerability, or sadness, or something in his voice, but there’s nothing. It’s flat, emotionless.

  "Enough questions about me," he says. "I want to hear more about that Koolkuna place." He sounds like he has a mouthful of food.

  "Hey, those are supplies, not snacks!"

  "I'm hungry. Don't tell me you never sat in here and helped yourself to the food. No one would have even known."

  "No, I didn't. Because then someone else might have gone hungry when the sick ones came." I grab a basket and slide it toward him. "If you're going to eat, then you're going to help. Here, put this on that shelf." I point to the one I mean.

  "Damn, you're bossy." But he does what I asked. I decide to find out how far I can take it.

  "And these can go up there, too." I gesture at a few other bundles I carried in from the main cavern. I hide my astonishment when he does what I said. "Listen, I'll make you a deal. If you help me carry some stuff in and put it away, I'll tell you about Koolkuna."

  "Don't push your luck. I didn't sign up for manual labor. This is guard duty only."

  I blow warm air on my hands. They're slowly freezing from the fingertips down, like ten mini icicles. "C'mon, Mr. Helpful."

  We go back to the cave entrance and gather a new load of supplies. I get the feeling Moray could carry a lot more if he wanted to, but at least he's working. So I keep my side of the bargain. I talk to him about Koolkuna. I'm afraid of making it sound too good. The last thing our friends there need is Moray showing up. Talk about ruining a good thing. He doesn't say much as I talk. I don't even know if he's listening. At least he doesn't whistle.

  I'm describing the Hidden Waters, the underground river that almost killed Peree and me, as we enter the storeroom with the last load. I'm so wrapped up in the memory of the powerful rush of water, that it almost doesn't surprise me when Moray shoves me against the wall. He traps my body with his bulk, his hand over my mouth. It's like being crushed by a living, breathing rockslide.

  My heart backflips into my throat. Not again. I yank my knife out, but it catches on my pocket. I struggle to free it.

  When it comes right down to it, using a deadly weapon on someone—even when that someone is Moray—isn't easy. Cringing, I sort of poke it into his side.

  I’m positive I puncture his skin, but he doesn't even flinch. Or let up. He whispers near my ear.

  "Cut it ou
t. Someone's here . . . a Lofty. I can see his girly hair."

  I jerk my head, trying to free my mouth. He pushes a warning finger against my lips, then slowly lets go.

  "It's probably Peree, you moron," I hiss. "Let me go! If he sees you holding me like this, he’ll kill you."

  He doesn't budge. "He can try."

  I struggle to get away from him before Peree spots us, but it's too late. Footsteps fly toward us across the storeroom floor. Moray releases me, and I hear a series of punches. Fists meet flesh. The noise sounds like the cooks when they're pounding meat, preparing it for curing and drying. Only this particular meat has a familiar honeysuckle scent.

  I hop up and down in agitation, knife in hand. "Moray, if you hurt him, I swear I'll tell everyone about your baby. And . . . and you can forget hearing anything else about Koolkuna!" My threats really are pathetic. "Peree, he wasn't hurting me . . . both of you, quit it!"

  I'm amazed when the ruckus stops. I don't waste any time jumping between them, hands outstretched.

  "You okay?" Peree's voice sounds thin, like he's talking into a cup. A moment later I detect an unmistakable rusty smell.

  "Where are you bleeding?" I drop the knife in my pocket and feel around for his face.

  "Nose." It sounds like he says noz.

  I snag one of the baskets off the top shelf, scrambling out of the way as it tumbles down. When my groping hand meets something sufficiently cloth-like, I grab it, pressing it gently to his face.

  "Thanks," he says, but it comes out like tanks.

  "What, no love for me?" Moray's voice isn't exactly normal, either.

  "Don't start," I growl.

  "You did cut me with that knife. The least you can do is throw me a cloth, too."

  I toss one in his direction.

  "You cut him?" Peree says, laughter warming his voice. "Good work. I warned you not to touch her again, Moray. What's he doing here, anyway?"

  "He's here to protect me and to watch out for you. The Three’s orders. He only grabbed me because he saw you out there. Believe it or not, he was kind of doing his job."

  "Why'd you stab me then?" Moray complains.

  "Try telling me what's going on next time before you crush me into the nearest wall," I snap.

  "She's a mouthy one, isn't she?" he says.

  Peree ignores that. "So what now? What are you supposed to do if you see me, Moray?"

  "Bring you to the Three so they can decide on an appropriate punishment for you." He imitates Bream.

  "You're not going to do that." The knife's back in my hand. I raise it up and step in front of Peree.

  I must look ridiculous, because they both kind of chuckle. At least Peree tries to smother his laughter.

  "Relax, sweetheart. I'm not gonna turn your Lofty in," Moray says.

  I don't let the knife drop an inch. "Why not?"

  "Because it wouldn't get me what I want."

  "And what's that?" Now Peree sounds suspicious.

  "Koolkuna. I want to go."

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  If Moray had said it was his heart's desire to clean the toilet area in the caves every day for the rest of his life, I wouldn't have been more surprised.

  "Sorry, what was that?" I ask.

  "I want to go to Koolkuna." Moray speaks very slow and loud, like I'm hard of hearing.

  "Why?" I ask.

  "Why not? It sounds better than here. Anywhere sounds better than here."

  "But you can't . . . I mean, I'm not sure that's such a—"

  Peree interrupts me. "We might consider it. With two conditions."

  My mouth drops open. Why would Peree even think about agreeing?

  "Like?" Moray asks.

  "One: you keep watching out for Fenn until we leave. Protect her when I'm not around. And that means not touching her unless absolutely necessary. Two: if you see me on the ground, that’s our secret. Fenn and I need to be able to meet at least one more time to plan."

  "Deal," Moray says.

  I throw my hands up. "Hold on, no deal. Moray, please give us a minute to talk. Privately." I grab Peree's arm and drag him out of the storeroom. "And put that basket back up, will you?"

  "No," Moray says, like I asked him to extract his own tooth for me.

  I pull Peree into the main cavern far enough that we can't be overheard. "What are you doing? We can't trust him!"

  "I think we can." His voice still sounds nasally.

  "You're pretty confident for someone who got his nose bashed in by the guy you think is so trustworthy." I touch his face gingerly to soften my words. Sure enough, he's still holding the cloth up to stanch the flow. "Why did you agree to take him with us?"

  "Because I talked to Frost. I know what Moray really wants."

  I wince. "Do I even want to hear this?"

  "It's not quite what you think," Peree says, pushing my hair back from my face with his free hand.

  "What then?"

  "He told Frost he wants her to go to Koolkuna, and he'd find a way to get there, too."

  "Wow. That's . . . unexpected. So he wants to partner with her?"

  "I wouldn't go that far. But he really wants the hatchling. Going to Koolkuna is the only way Moray knows for sure he'll get to see his child. Frost hopes the rest will come in time."

  "Tell her not to hold her breath," I mutter.

  "I already did."

  "They aren't the only ones that want to go with us, either," Peree says. "People keep cornering me and Kadee, asking us about Koolkuna. I think we might have gotten through to a few people after all." He sounds enthusiastic.

  I stretch my neck back and forth; an afternoon headache is brewing. "I was all set to tell you Eland and I are ready to leave—the three of us."

  He slides a hand along my shoulder, massaging it. "Bringing a few people with us . . . that's what you said you wanted, right?"

  I don’t know anymore. I’m confused. "But Moray? Really?"

  "If I can bribe him to protect you while I can't be with you, then it's worth it. If Moray's around all the time, maybe whoever it is that threatened you will think twice before trying it again."

  "You don't know him, Peree. The anuna won't thank us for bringing him."

  "I heard that," Moray says from nearby, sounding amused.

  "We can't even trust him to leave us alone for a few minutes," I say.

  Moray ignores me. "Like I said, you have a deal, Lofty. I keep your girl safe for you and you take me to Koolkuna. And my brothers."

  "What?" I squeak. "No. Absolutely not. We'll be hand-delivering an entire generation of trouble to the anuna."

  "It'll be okay. Trust me," Peree says.

  "You, I trust. Them, not at all."

  "This is your chance to earn Fenn's trust, Moray," Peree says.

  "It's what I've been living for," he drawls.

  I push my hands through my hair, frustrated with Peree for making a deal with Moray literally over my head, even if he did it because he thinks he's ensuring my safety.

  "For the record, I think this is a really, really bad idea," I say.

  "For the record, no one cares," Moray responds. "And hurry it up, sweetheart. You've got more work to do. Gotta keep up appearances for the Three until it's time to leave for Koolkuna."

  "Don't call me that," I say automatically. "And go away."

  "Don't take too long," Moray says as he strolls off.

  "Peree—"

  He stops me with a firm kiss. I'm kind of ashamed to admit it, but I instantly forget whatever I was going to say, forget I'm angry, and forget that he smells like fresh blood. Instead I hold him to me, hungry for more.

  "I miss you," I breathe.

  "I miss you, too. That's why I'm doing this. So I won't have to miss you anymore. I'll agree to whatever I have to, to keep you safe and get us to Koolkuna. Together."

  I frown. "I hope you're right about Moray."

  “We need to organize supplies and decide how and when we'll move everyone there."

&
nbsp; "How many people are we talking about?"

  "So far I have Frost, Petrel, Moon, and Thrush. A few others are interested, too."

  "I'm so glad Petrel and Moon want to go! I was worried they might not. We'll have to leave soon, unless we want to deliver a baby on the way. Will she be able to walk all that way?"

  "She's strong. She'll manage."

  "All I have is Eland—and now Moray and his brothers." I groan. "They're going to kick me right back out of Koolkuna when we get there."

  Peree puts his fingers against my mouth. Then he nuzzles my neck, meandering slowly around to my mouth. By the time he lets up, my thoughts are as jumbled as a pile of unlaundered clothes.

  "I have to go," he whispers.

  "Not yet," I snuggle into his arms.

  "I don't want to, believe me. But Petrel can only make excuses for me for so long. Osprey's paranoid. He would probably have someone spying on me all the time, if he had anyone to spare. Takes everything I have not to knock him out for what he did to you and Eland."

  "No more violence. Please. We'll go, and this will all be over." There’s a painful tearing in my gut as a few more stitches pull free. I might say I'm ready to go, but I can tell it's not going to be so easy to do.

  "Meet me by the water hole tonight when the moon is highest. I'll bring Kadee, and we'll make a plan."

  I frown. "Okay, but this has to be the last time. I think the Three—well, probably everyone—know we’ve been meeting. I don’t want them to escalate their threats against you." Our mouths meet one more time. The kiss is sweet, lingering, full of reassurance. He touches my necklace and leaves.

  A little dazed, I wander back into the storeroom.

  "Back to work, sweetheart."

  "Shut up, Moray."

  It was one thing when only Peree, Eland, and I were going to Koolkuna. A lot more people are involved now. And I'm not positive I can trust any of them.

  A glorious glow fills the sky as I exit the cave mouth after finishing my work. I inhale a fusion of sunlight, soil, and greenheart sap. If the late summer forest had a flavor, this would be it.

  If would be a perfect afternoon . . . if Moray wasn't still trailing me.