Picket Fence Surprise

by Kris Fletcher

  He sat in his car in the parking lot, drumming his fingers on the wheel. He knew what he wanted to do. He wanted to drive to Heather’s place and make dinner for her, a real dinner with candles and flowers and music. He wanted to cook something delicious for her and apologize for being an impatient, insensitive ass. He would rub her feet and listen to anything she needed to say, and not try anything more than a kiss.

  And then, being the total idiot he could be, he would probably ask her again.

  Someday he would learn how to stop himself before he pushed too far. He hoped it would happen before Cady got old enough to realize what a fool her father could be.

  But in the meantime, there was an overwhelmed, confused, probably scared woman on the other side of town. A woman he desperately wanted to help, but who had asked for nothing more than time and space.

  He might not be able to do much else for her, but by God, he could give her that.

  He started the car and left the parking lot. Maybe he would swing by Darcy’s place, see Cady for a minute, grab Lulu and go for a walk. Yeah. That sounded a lot more sanity-saving than going home and making himself nuts. Or, worse, calling Heather.

  But as he pulled into Darcy’s driveway, it hit him that he might have an even better alternative. Assuming he had the nerve.

  He slammed the door and shook his head. Nerve, he had in abundance. Wisdom was what he needed. Wisdom guided by experience.

  So when Darcy opened the door with a surprised smile, obviously ready to call to Cady, he raised a hand to stop her.

  “Hang on,” he said. “I know I’m being super-rude and I should have called, but could I talk to you for a few minutes? Without Ian?”

  “About—”

  “It’s nothing about Cady. I need advice. And you are the only person on this planet who can help me.”

  Her eyes widened, but God bless her, she simply said, “Give me a minute,” and closed the door. He shoved his hands in his pockets—already the evenings had a nip—and waited. He still wasn’t sure what he could say, but some of the jitteriness he’d been feeling was easing, so he figured he was on the right track.

  True to her word, in less than two minutes Darcy emerged, wrapped in Ian’s old, oversize Leafs jacket. Xander took in the ensemble with a raised eyebrow.

  She shrugged. “It was the closest thing I could find, okay?”

  He actually thought it was kind of cute, but he wasn’t about to mention that. There was no way to say it without it sounding wrong.

  “Let’s sit in the car. I didn’t bring a coat, and unlike you, I don’t have a husband to mooch off.”

  “Sucks to be you.”

  Once they were settled, he steeled himself and said, “I know you don’t have a lot of time, and to be honest, there’s not a lot I can tell you. So I’m going to cut right to the chase. You’re going to have questions, I know, but I won’t be able to answer them. All I need to know is—”

  “Wait.” She shifted to face him, her usual smile replaced by the pursed lips of worry. “Xander, you’re not...you’re not in trouble again, are you?”

  It took him a second.

  Understanding was accompanied by a rush of—he wasn’t sure. Sorrow? Anger? Disappointment. Yeah. And hurt, that Darcy of all people would think that.

  “No.”

  It came out clipped, almost harsh.

  She pulled back. “I’m sorry,” she said. “But with Cady...”

  Yeah. He got that. But it still hurt.

  Shake it off, Xander. No regrets, remember?

  He started over. “I need to know what you would have wanted from me—how I could have helped—if I had been around when you found out you were pregnant.”

  Her hands flew up to cover her mouth. Above them, her eyes were wide and wondering.

  “I know what you’re going to ask,” he said, “and no, I can’t tell you who she is.”

  She scrunched up her nose like she had suspicions.

  “Not that it would matter, because it’s nobody you know.” A bald-faced lie, but if and when the truth came out, he was pretty sure she would understand.

  “Sure. Right. Got it.”

  He hadn’t fooled her one bit.

  “Will you at least confirm that you are the father?”

  “Would I be asking if I wasn’t?”

  She stared at him for a moment. Probably trying to read his mind. He tried to make it go blank, but had a sudden flash of the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man from Ghostbusters and decided he’d take his chances.

  “Okay.” Her hands fluttered through the air. “I...wow. This is a toughie. Are you...is this, um, a relationship? Like, a romantic one?”

  How was he supposed to answer that? “That’s still under negotiation.”

  “Oh.”

  Yeah. Oh.

  “I take it this wasn’t planned.”

  He shook his head.

  “Is she happy about it?”

  He stared at the garage door. There was a nick in the bottom right corner. “Right now, she’s in shock. But I hope she will be.”

  “Does she have other kids?”

  “Sorry. No identifying info allowed.”

  “Even though I have no idea who she is.”

  He glared. She sighed.

  “Okay, maybe I was fishing a little, but it’s a legitimate question. If she already has kids, this might not be as big a shock for her.”

  “Trust me. I don’t think this could possibly have come as more of a surprise.”

  “Hmm.” She pulled the edges of the jacket closer. “But you want to know what she needs from you at this point.”

  “That’s about it.”

  “Well...she needs to know she’s not alone. That even if you two aren’t in a relationship, you’re still going to be there for whatever she needs from you. That’s the biggie.”

  “I’ve been working on that part.”

  “Good. Does she know about Cady?”

  “Yes.”

  “Has she met Cady?”

  He glared again. She pinked up.

  “Fine. Let me think...well, she might not be ready to talk money and custody and all that yet, but you can definitely start thinking about those things, give her some suggestions. Let her know that you plan to be a full partner in supporting and raising the child.”

  That was a good point. None of that had come up yet, but it would. Getting ready would prove to Heather that he was taking this seriously.

  “But let her set the pace. You can maybe let her know that you’re ready to talk whenever she is, but don’t push it.”

  He could do that.

  “And she might...she needs to know that you care about her, too. That it’s not just about the baby. I mean, let’s face it, Xander.” Darcy leaned back in her seat. “Practically speaking, this isn’t going to take over your life the way it will hers. Physically, emotionally, her lifestyle...everything is going to change, especially if this is her first.”

  “So how do I help her through that? What would you have wanted?”

  “A crystal ball would have been nice.” She laughed ruefully. “Other than that, do things to let her know you understand and appreciate what she’s going through. Pamper her. Give her little things like fancy soaps and foods she can eat, especially if she has a lot of nausea. Oh, and gift certificates for pregnancy massages.”

  “That’s a thing?”

  “Oh yeah. I had one when I was about seven months along with Cady. It was the best hour of the whole nine months.”

  It must have been, judging from the faraway softness on her face.

  “Really, Xander, as long as you make sure she knows she can count on you and rely on you, that’s going to be what she needs most.”

  “
Okay.” He patted her hand “Thanks, Darce. This was good.”

  “Not a problem. And if you have any other questions or anything, you know where to find me.”

  “Appreciate it.”

  “I don’t suppose I can tell Ian what we were discussing.”

  Ah, damn. “I don’t want to make you lie to him,” he said after a moment. “But if you could—I don’t know. Stall him? Maybe tell him it’s something I’ll tell him myself, but I can’t yet. Because there’s other people involved.”

  “You know Ian. He’ll assume that means you’re leaving Northstar.”

  Yeah, he would. “You can definitely tell him it’s not a work thing. And not a health thing, or my folks.” He met her gaze. “And that I’m not in trouble again.”

  “Xander, I’m sorry for assuming that’s what it was.”

  “It’s okay. I can’t blame you. But I have to admit, coming from you, it was a...a surprise.”

  “One that I’m not proud of. But since we’re into the confessions, I have one for you.” She hesitated. “Hearing you ask about this, about what to do and how to help... That was good. Because I always wondered what it would have been like if you had been around right from the start. Now I know.”

  Not really, he thought. She was judging by his response now, when he was back to himself. He couldn’t guarantee that he would have been so concerned in his shithead days.

  But he wasn’t going to take that bit of comfort away from Darce. Not after everything she’d given him.

  “I’m sorry I wasn’t there,” he said. “I would have liked to help.”

  “I know. But knowing you the way I do now, I’m glad in a way that you weren’t.”

  He wasn’t sure his eyebrows had ever soared so high.

  “Because,” she hurried on, “if you had been there, I would have relied on you, instead of Ian. And then he and I might not have ended up together. And much as I think you’re a great guy and all, Xander, I definitely ended up with the right man for me.”

  She was right. If he had been around, and if he had snapped back to his senses faster, he would have wanted to be part of things from the start. He might even have tried to build something with Darcy. Knowing her the way he did, he could see that that would have been an epic fail in every respect. It could have led to hard feelings and resentment, driving them farther apart and making it infinitely harder to do a successful job of sharing Cady.

  No wonder Heather was so reluctant to give marriage a shot.

  Except...

  “If we’re done...” Darcy said, and he pulled himself back from his reverie.

  “Yeah. I’m good. Thanks, Darce.”

  “Anytime.” She paused, her hand on the door. “At some point, we’ll have to talk about how Cady plays into all of this. You know. If you need to change up your times with her, anything like that.”

  “Right.” He spoke absentmindedly.

  “But for now, in case I forgot to say it in all the shock, congratulations.” Her smile was full and sincere. “That’s going to be one lucky baby to have landed with you.”

  “Thanks, Darce.”

  “See you tomorrow.” She scooted out of the car and back into the house. Xander had a glimpse of Ian when he opened the door to her, Cady in one arm, reaching with the other to touch Darcy’s face before the door closed again. Before Xander could point out the one piece Darcy had missed.

  She had given him some great ideas and made some excellent points, but she had never mentioned love. Never asked about it. Never pointed out that it would have been missing between them, had they tried to make a go of it.

  But he hadn’t forgotten.

  And he was pretty sure that what he felt for Heather might be a lot like those bulbs he had picked up the other day, filled with the promise of something beautiful.

  That had to count for something.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  THAT EVENING, HEATHER made sure she had plenty of time to get to Tim Hortons before Hank. The queasiness Xander had asked about had made an appearance. Hormones? Nerves? She couldn’t know, but if she was going to have a hard time, or need a peppermint or some crackers, she wanted to have her supplies set well before Hank arrived.

  So of course, he was already in a booth when she walked in the door.

  She managed her best casual wave and went to the counter to buy herself time. She placed her order and inhaled deeply, deliberately testing the assortment of scents. So far, so good. At least the evening crowd wasn’t as heavily into coffee as the morning rush.

  Maybe she would be okay.

  She carried her food to the booth, attempting to rehearse her speech as she navigated through the lines. The problem was that every opening she came up with kept getting hijacked.

  Hank, it’s been over a month since you said you’d think about it... And I only have so many months left before everything is going to spin sideways again.

  Hank, I’m starting the new job next week, so I think this is the perfect time... Because if we wait too long to get into a new schedule, guess what?

  Hank, Millie is having a hard time understanding why this hasn’t been resolved yet... So I’d like to have this settled before I have to discuss other things she might find difficult to comprehend. Like, oh, pregnancy. Especially since this was a case when Heather couldn’t use the old line about when a man and a woman loved each other very much.

  Oh hell. She was not going to go there. Not now.

  I’ll think about it.

  And she would. But tonight was about Millie, and she would not let herself be waylaid by thoughts of Xander again. Millie first. Everything else would come later.

  “Hi.” She placed her food on the table and slid into the booth. “Hope you weren’t waiting long.”

  “Not too long. I had some errands to run, so it was easier to come straight here.” He glanced at her soup. “That looks good.”

  “Yeah, I think it’ll hit the spot tonight. Now.” She pulled her notebook and phone from her bag and set them on the table. “Calendars first?”

  It wasn’t cowardice to start with the routine, she told herself. It helped get them into that familiar rhythm, helped them remember that they knew how to discuss problems constructively.

  They talked through the upcoming weeks, the back to school events, the start of Guides and Sunday school. As they dealt with each successive week, Heather had to work harder to stay focused, to deal with only the item at hand. She couldn’t let herself get knocked off pace by the fact that each flip of a page brought them closer to Millie’s birthday.

  Instead, each time they worked their way to another Sunday, she ate more chicken soup. Comfort food.

  She was enjoying it until she noticed that Hank got a funny expression on his face every time she ate some.

  Maybe he skipped lunch. “Oh,” she said. “The volcano project. I want to work on that with her this weekend. Do you have any chicken wire?”

  “Yeah, I can send some with her. And if you need any tools, let me know. She’s pretty excited about this.”

  “Which only adds to my terror.”

  “I’m with you on that one.” He gave her now-empty bowl another of those odd looks, shook his head and leaned forward, his hands wrapped around his mug. “I’ve been thinking about what you asked,” he said abruptly. “About shared custody.”

  Her breath fluttered. “Thank you.”

  “Uh... I don’t think I gave you an answer yet.”

  “You didn’t. That was for thinking it over instead of, you know, saying an automatic no.”

  “Yeah, well, you can thank Brynn for that, too. She’s the one who told me to give it a few weeks.”

  “I always knew I liked her.”

  He shook his head, as if amazed that the ex and the
current wife could be so comfortable with each other.

  Could he and Xander ever—

  She couldn’t think about that now.

  “So here’s where I’m at,” Hank said. “I’m not ready to give you a full yes right now.”

  She willed herself to stay composed, crushing the empty cellophane from her crackers between her fingers.

  “But I would be okay with giving it a test run. You know. A trial period. Say, from now until Christmas.”

  Air whooshed from her lungs as his words sank in. He was giving her a chance.

  So much for staying composed.

  “Thank you.” The words came out choked and watery. Stupid hormones.

  He frowned. “I know you would rather I say yes right away, but—”

  She shook her head and her hand, cutting him off. “No. This is...” Relief and gratitude. Exhaustion and confusion. And that was just today’s parade of emotions. “This is good. Really. You have no idea.”

  “I might have an inkling.”

  “Want me to draw up a couple of sample schedules? I can email them to you, and we can go from there.” That would be great. It would give her something concrete to do, something to command her attention between her return to the doctor at the end of the week and Xander’s texts and her own promise to consider Xander’s proposal.

  “Sounds good.”

  “I won’t say anything to Millie yet. Not until we’re ready to roll.”

  He nodded.

  “When we have everything worked out, would you like to be the one to tell her?”

  He dragged his eyes back from the thorough inspection they’d been giving to her bowl. “Me?”

  “If you don’t want to, I understand. But Hank—this is really a gift from you to her. It’s only right that you be the one to tell her.”

  “I don’t—” He stopped, seeming to give the matter some thought. Heather was about to suggest he wait to give her an answer when he shifted forward again.

  “I think,” he said slowly, “maybe the best thing would be for us to tell her together. So she knows we’re both good with this.” His faint smile told her how hard he was trying. “I hear that’s something we might need to practice. You know, with adolescence just around the corner.”