by Drew Sera
I sighed and looked over at him. My eyes got watery again but this time I didn’t try to push it down. I was home and suffering a horrible loss.
“I was thinking about what I’m going to do or what it’s going to be like, if she doesn’t come home.”
Anthony grabbed my arm and pulled me off the barstool into a hug. He rubbed on my arms and made me feel like it would be all right, no matter what. I’m trying to stay positive, but I know that if Sydney doesn’t come home, Anthony and I will be far from okay.
“Fucking stop thinking like that, man.” His tone was gentle and calm and I heard him sniffle. I tried to pull away so I could see if he was crying, only he held me tighter against him so I wouldn’t see.
49
Wednesday, January 22nd
Matt
Colin hadn’t received any texts or pictures or videos from Paul since yesterday, and it was worrying him quite a bit. Since Sydney was taken, Paul has sent Colin something just about everyday and with each text or video, it drives the knife further into them. I hated seeing him and Anthony like this. All I could do was be strong for the two of them. I didn’t want to think the worst either, but it was going on two weeks and with each picture or video, I could see the damage being done.
Blake and I were getting some plates down for dinner while Colin was checking on some work emails and Anthony was sitting outside again. I needed to find out what had gone on with Anthony and the sadist still. Things with him weren’t getting any better, and I knew he was in pain but he wouldn’t admit it.
I went into the great room when I heard the doorbell, knowing it was Gina and my folks with dinner. My parents had some take out bags with food and Gina was bending down to pick up a box that was next to the door. I took it from her arms and we all went into the kitchen.
We all sat down to eat and as usual, Anthony was last to arrive to the table. He had the smallest plate and it had become common to see him just push food around his plate. Colin asked me to not push Anthony on the matter, but it was getting bad. As we were cleaning up, I pointed to the box that was by the door and Colin went over to it.
“I guess that came today. We must have been outside when the postman delivered it,” I said while Colin looked cautiously at the box.
“There isn’t a return address, and I don’t think I ordered anything.”
“Yeah, I don’t see a logo either,” I added and got up from the table to go stand beside him.
He pulled the tape off and pushed the box flaps to the side and I leaned over him to see what was inside. The contents were clothes. Sydney’s clothes. Oh fuck. Colin pushed the clothes around in the box revealing the zip up sweatshirt Sydney wore that day and then her jeans. By this time some of the conversations at the table had diminished and Colin was breathing hard.
“Col,” I said his name and tried to gently pull the box away and I looked up to see my dad coming over to help. Colin’s grip on the box was firm, and he pulled it back in front of him.
“What’s in the box, Col?” Anthony asked and stood up.
Of course he grew concerned when he saw how Colin and I were acting. He frowned and looked at me.
“Matt’s what in it?”
I shook my head and now Anthony was on his way over with Blake behind him. Anthony leaned over the breakfast bar and pulled a flap on the box down so he could see inside.
“What the…” Anthony pulled out the sweatshirt and then frantically pulled out her jeans and her shirt. The shirt had been cut open. The box also contained her bra and panties, which both had been cut from her body.
Colin just looked at her clothes but wasn’t saying anything and Anthony was a manic mess. I pulled Colin to lean against me. I could feel his chest heaving and I knew he was trying to keep himself calm. I tried to help him by rubbing up and down his arm.
“Calm down, Col,” I said quietly.
He took a deep, steadying breath and pushed himself away from the kitchen island where the box sat. Colin paced around for a few moments and then came back to the island and knocked the box off the counter. The contents fell out of the box and scattered on the floor.
“Hey!” Anthony quickly moved and began picking up Sydney’s clothes. “These are Sydney’s, Colin!” Anthony held the clothes in his arms and stared at Colin in disbelief.
I pulled Colin against me again and told him to calm down. My mom and dad stood by Gina while Blake was close to Anthony. Anthony finished gently folding Sydney’s clothes and set them on the counter. He ran his hand over the zip up sweatshirt and pulled lint off of it. “I know you’re angry. We all are angry. If you want to knock something around, you’ve got a gym upstairs.” Anthony looked up from her sweatshirt at Colin. “Don’t throw her stuff.” I swear that Anthony looked like he was close to tears. He closed his mouth tightly and made a fist on her sweatshirt. “She was in this sweatshirt,” Anthony said, but his voice was barely above a whisper.
I could feel Colin exhaling the breath he was holding. He moved out from under my arm and hugged Anthony. Colin apologized in a similar quiet tone so just the three of us, and possibly Blake could hear.
“I’m sorry, man. I didn’t mean to do that. I was so angry that someone else other than you, and I pulled those clothes off her. I’m sorry, Anth.”
I’m still amazed that the only person than can get that close to Anthony since Sydney was abducted is Colin. Anthony never flinches around Colin and never puts up a protest with him.
The evening was very somber and for the most part, Colin sat quietly at the couch. My parents took Gina home but Blake stayed. It was going on 10:30 when Anthony retreated upstairs. Not much after that, Colin headed up as well. I knew Colin slept in the bed and Anthony slept on the floor. They were at least in close proximity of one another and I thought it would benefit both of them.
I stayed over and woke up in the middle of the night to noise in the kitchen. The kitchen light had just flipped on so I went to go investigate. Anthony was sitting at the breakfast bar and was holding onto Sydney’s sweatshirt. I felt bad for him and could see how much he ached for that connection. He stood as soon as he saw me and clutched the sweatshirt. I detected that he thought I was going to take it away from him.
“It’s alright, Anth. Relax, I’d be doing the same thing,” I said to him and went to the fridge. I pulled out some bottles of water and gave him one.
He’s not eating much, not sleeping much and I don’t think he was drinking enough either. I had a better chance of getting him to drink something than eat something. I wanted him to calm down and relax some. He’s wound tighter than Colin is and the package of Sydney’s clothes this afternoon had upset all of us. I sat down at the kitchen table and pushed out the chair at the head of the table for Anthony. Eventually, he came over and sat down with Sydney’s sweatshirt. I understood the psychology behind Anthony wanting and needing to be close to her sweatshirt.
“Couldn’t sleep?”
He shook his head. I tried to start other conversations with him, but he wasn’t receptive to it. I could see the tired, worn out look in his eyes and I knew he was near his breaking point also. Colin hit his a few days ago and Anthony was very close to his. Anthony has been trying to be strong for Colin but in the process, he’s been pushing everything he’s feeling out of sight. I decided I just needed to give him his space and I stood to go back to the great room.
“I’ll let you be. Try to drink some water, Anth.”
He looked up at me and I saw the desperation in his eyes.
“Wait…I…I’d like the company,” he said.
I smiled at him and sat back down. He played with Sydney’s sweatshirt sleeve and then looked up at me.
“I don’t want to talk much but just would like some company. If that’s okay.”
I nodded at him. I was proud of him for voicing a need and for knowing that he can lean on me. He and I went to sit in the great room, and I knew he’d be more comfortable in there because his body has been through hell. I
wasn’t surprised that he didn’t say much of anything but within the hour he was fast asleep on the couch, clutching Sydney’s sweatshirt. He was lying on his stomach on top of the sweatshirt and held onto her sleeve. I stood up and went to cover him up with a blanket. As I lowered the blanket onto him, I noticed his shirt was raised up, exposing his lower back and sides. I took a closer look at the terrible bruising on him from last Saturday. Goddammit. I was angry but tried to control it. I was going to find out exactly what happened either from his mouth or the sadist’s. I exhaled slowly, pulled his shirt down and covered him up.
“Try to sleep, little brother. I love you, Anth.”
I returned to my chair by the fireplace, propped my feet up on the ottoman and tried to sleep.
50
Thursday, January 23rd
Colin
I woke up early to the sound of an incoming text. Before I reached for my phone I glanced at the floor where Anthony had been sleeping only to find a crumpled blanket and pillow. Fuck. Was this a text telling or showing me that somehow Paul had Anthony? I picked up the phone and glanced.
702-555-3975: Does your breakfast look better?
“Fuck,” I swore out loud.
With the text was a picture of my baby lying on the floor. She was chained, her body full of marks and her face was so sad. Her eyes were open but I couldn’t see my girl. Her eyes were as Matt described them the other day. Lost, in shock and scared. Near her hand was a slice of bread.
I tossed my phone on the other side of the bed and picked up her collar from the nightstand. I gently rubbed my thumb over the heart of the collar.
“I love you so much, Sydney. Don’t give up hope, baby.”
I took a deep breath and set her collar down in the trinket dish on the nightstand. I needed to find Anthony and share the text and picture. I promised him that I wouldn’t keep things from him, though it seriously crossed my mind not to share this.
I drug myself to the bathroom and brushed my teeth. I didn’t bother shaving. It wasn’t even 7:00 a.m. and I was dead tired. I pulled on some jeans and a shirt that Sydney gave me, grabbed my phone and began my search for Anthony. As I came down the stairs, I could see that I wasn’t going to have to venture too far. Anthony was face down on the couch asleep and Matt was sipping coffee with the TV on mute. He set the cup down and stood when he saw me.
I stopped walking because a lump had formed in my throat. I couldn’t wake Anthony up and show him this shit. Matt was walking towards me and eyed the cell phone in my hands.
“Col, what is it?”
I looked down at the phone in my hands and without looking back up at Matt, I told him about the text and picture.
“She doesn’t look good, Matt.”
He took the phone from my hands and I knew he was looking over the picture of Sydney. He asked if I sent it to the police yet and when I said that I hadn’t, he mentioned that he would. He handed the phone back to me and wrapped his arm around me, guiding me to the couch. I flopped down near the opposite end of the couch from Anthony but closest to the chair where Matt had been sitting.
“How long has he been down here? I didn’t hear him get up.”
Matt looked in the direction of Anthony and then at his watch.
“Few hours. I woke up to a noise in the kitchen. He was in there just sitting at the table with her sweatshirt.”
I felt like I had just been hit in the stomach. That fucking box had her clothes in it. I nodded and looked over at Anthony. Near his neck I could see the hint of her blue sweatshirt.
“It really upset him yesterday, Col.”
I knew he was upset about the clothes yesterday. I think everyone was. I wasn’t going to pull anything away from him that obviously made him feel a little better.
51
Friday, January 24th
Paul
Last night got down into the single digit and I repeated our game from the other night. I kept her outside for about fifteen minutes, flogged her inside and chained her up for a few hours. We did this over and over until I was tired. After I fed her some toast for her dinner, she asked about Graves again. Fucking cunt! Why in the hell is she still going on about him?
I was beginning to pack up the place and Saturday couldn’t come quick enough. My flight is scheduled and even though I thought I’d have Graves and Everett out of her head, I can still work it out of her when we arrive in the Cayman Islands. Besides, I think last night’s beating and mental game inside and outside might have done the trick.
Bringing her inside was like dragging in a soaked dead body. She was heavy in my hands and since I hosed her off before chaining her to the stairs, her hair had ice crystals in it. Her skin was pale and teeth were chattering. She looked defeated and I just about threw my hands up in victory. Just about.
She was saying something under her breath. Or maybe that was all she could muster for full strength at the moment. As I got closer though, I heard it. Loud and fucking clear.
“Anth-ony, C-col-in,” she chattered.
Anger seared hot through my veins, and I grabbed her by her neck and threw her down. I had packed all the whips so all I had was my own belt. I tore it from my pants and began beating her with it uncontrollably. She curled up in a ball on the floor as I rained force down on her. Blood became apparent, and then I was seized with more anger. I had cut her up pretty bad. It would take fucking weeks, maybe a month for these marks to heal. It only made me beat her harder. I only stopped when I grew tired.
Everett should see this. Fucking gorgeous. Realizing that I had gone through my supply of phones, I grabbed Sydney’s. I powered the thing on, snapped a few photos and sent them to Everett. Fuck him!
As my luck would have it, I had to endure the fucking sick display of him smiling as I selected his name from Sydney’s phone and hit send. Fucking Everett. I quickly shut the phone off and chained her back up.
52
Friday, January 24th
Colin
Friday nights used to hold so much excitement for Anthony and I. Golf, dinner and Irons. We loved taking Sydney there. She was just starting to really enjoy it. I was sitting at my table surrounded by Matt, Blake and Anthony. My family was all here with the exception of the person who could start and stop my heart. We had just finished dinner and my phone chirped alerting me of a text. Before I even looked at the phone, I shut my eyes and prayed for strength.
SB: Your fucking cunt made me do this.
With the text there were four pictures of what I think was Sydney’s body. But holy fuck, it hit me like electricity. It was from her phone! The text was from her cell phone! Before I could relay the info to everyone, another message window popped up saying my iPhone had been located. I hit the box to open it and instantly was seeing the GPS map out where Sydney’s phone was. I leaned against the table for strength and was instantly surrounded by everyone. Matt took the phone from me and then shot a look over at me.
“It’s her phone, Col! Look!” Matt held the phone out to show everyone.
I hadn’t seen that much life in Anthony in nearly two weeks. He grabbed the phone and flipped back to the pictures. He didn’t speak as he fiddled with my phone but kept the phone low enough to where we could all see what he was doing. He saved the pictures to my camera roll and then opened the pictures in the camera roll app. He was obviously pleased with whatever he had done.
“Fuck! Yes!” He exclaimed as he turned to phone to face me.
I looked at the disgusting picture and then the words showing me where the picture was taken. Our fragile kitten was up at Mount Charleston. My phone gave us an excellent image of the location.
“Let’s go get our girl, Col.”
Matt grabbed both Anthony and I by our shirts to stop us in our tracks.
“You’re not driving. I am.”
Blake, Anthony, Matt, and I grabbed our jackets and raced to my Range Rover. I sat in the front passenger seat and watched the red arrow on my screen. I begged Matt to hurry. This was
literally life and death. I sent the info to the police detectives while Blake had them on the phone. This would be one time where I should have encouraged Anthony to drive.
An hour and fifteen long grueling minutes later, we had pulled onto an unpaved road closer to where the red arrow indicated her phone was. We were nearly right on top of the red arrow now. It had snowed up here that past few nights but there didn’t appear to be any fresh tire tracks. In the short distance I could see Paul’s truck and the hellish place where he’s kept my baby. It was a modest two-story cabin, and I instantly glared at the wooden stairs that led up to the second floor. Those were the stairs in the photo. The place looked dark. Suddenly a chill ran over me but I still told Matt to go faster down the snow-covered road. There was a small clearing before the thick blanket of the dark woods began.
“Don’t lose your head, Col. We can’t go racing in there. Remember, he has weapons.” Matt reminded us.
I slammed my fist on the door. I wasn’t going to sit here and wait. Fortunately, the asshole appeared. Paul stepped outside and when he recognized my SUV he took off into the darkness. Anthony was out of the car and chasing him before I could say anything and Blake was right behind him.
“Blake! Don’t lose them!” Matt yelled after Blake.
Matt and I jumped out of the car and raced to the cabin. I recognized the stench of something rotting as we stepped towards the door. Matt grabbed me firmly by the arm. His expression was one in warning and yet I knew it was meant to calm me, too.
“Col, that smell. It’s…”
Refusing to believe the worst, I shoved past him and went into the cabin. I yelled out for Sydney and heard nothing in return. Matt and I frantically searched the first floor and then we saw a door that had several deadbolts on it leading into a dark room. The door was ajar.
