A Mommy for His Baby

by Molly Evans

  “How’s it feel?”

  Aurora wiggled her hips, trying to decide how the chair fit her.

  With excitement in her eyes, she looked up at him. “It’s great.”

  “Awesome.”

  He spun her around in a circle and then put his hands on the arms of the chair to stop it. Her face was only inches from his, and the second he looked down at her mouth that familiar zing shot through her system.

  God, she wanted his hands on her, his mouth on hers, his skin against hers. His head slowly lowered, his lips aiming to claim hers. Could she kiss him? Should she kiss him? She wanted to. But what about their friendship, his daughter, her temporary life here...?

  Aurora shook her head, the heady fog clearing somewhat. There was too much at stake. She took a deep breath. “I know we’re not teenagers, Beau. But this thing that’s happening between us is so new—”

  He stooped, so she didn’t have to look up at him and crane her neck. “I know. For me, too. We’ve never looked at each other this way before. It’s crazy. It’s exciting. It’s scary.”

  He blew out a sigh and placed one hand over hers, but didn’t back away from this conversation that was difficult for both of them.

  “But if we don’t reach out, take a step that’s scary, we’ll never know, will we?”

  Unable to stop herself, she placed her right hand on his cheek and looked into his eyes. “You’ve been through some tough times...you have a child and a business now. Your life’s complicated.” She looked down, uncertain how to say what she wanted to say to him. “I’m so ruined, I don’t know if I can find my way back. You shouldn’t—”

  “Don’t tell me what I should and shouldn’t feel.” After placing his hand beneath her chin, he raised her face to his and waited until she looked at him. “You’re not ruined, Aurora. You’ve hit a pothole in the road. That’s all. And I’m... I don’t know what I am...but right now I really want to kiss you.”

  He leaned in, and this time she met him halfway.

  She paused for a second, savoring the feelings swirling inside, trying to decide whether this was a good idea or not, but curiosity and need won over any caution whispering in her ears.

  When his lips touched hers she opened up to him and met his tongue with her own. The soft, silky glide stirred feelings in the pit of her stomach, in her feminine flesh, that hadn’t stirred in entirely too long. He held her face as if she were precious, and fragile, and important, and beautiful.

  Tears sprang to her eyes. She pulled back, her breathing coming fast, her heart thrumming in her chest.

  “I didn’t mean to make you cry. Was it that bad?” A sideways smile lifted Beau’s mouth.

  “No, you goof. In fact it was quite the opposite. You made me feel things I haven’t in a long time.”

  “That’s good, then—right?” He eased back down to kneel in front of her.

  “I don’t know, Beau. This is so strange and wonderful all at once, and I’ve no experience with it.”

  None at all. There were so many reasons not to go down this road with Beau. Had they already gone too far?

  “Me, either. We’re both on new and unfamiliar ground. All we can do is see if we’re a good match, other than as friends, and go from there.”

  “There’s so much about me you don’t know.”

  That worried her. She’d changed so much from the old days. So had he.

  With a gentle hand he pushed her hair back from her face. “There’s a lot of me that you don’t know either, and I’d like you to.” He closed his eyes and cleared his throat. “I’d like to tell you about my wife sometime, too.”

  “I’d like that.” With hands that trembled a bit she cupped his face, brought him closer for a light, tender kiss. He didn’t try to take it any further than that. “But for now we have a business to run, and you’ve got a baby to go get in a few minutes.”

  “You’re right.” He stepped back, still watching her, considering. “We’ll need to revisit this conversation another time, but tomorrow how about you tell me some more of your ideas for Brush Valley Day? I think you’re really onto something there.”

  “I will. I have a notebook full of stuff.”

  He kept backing toward the door, watching her until he’d backed into the wall and stumbled before gaining his feet.

  Without taking his gaze from her, he reached behind him for the door. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “Tomorrow, then.”

  She sighed, her heart pulsing with a new warmth as he left.

  “Wow. Just wow.”

  Grabbing her keys and her purse, she turned off the lights in the main room just as the door opened.

  “I’m sorry, but we’re—Beau! What are you doing? Did you forget something?”

  “Uh, yeah.” He emitted a sharp whistle. “Kinda forgot my dog.”

  Daisy trotted out from beneath the desk and went to Beau.

  “Oh, dear. Glad you remembered her.”

  “Yes. I was a little distracted there for a few minutes.”

  “Glad you’re better now.”

  That little hum in her chest hummed a little faster, a little warmer and a little louder, and the warning bells faded away into the distance.

  This was a new and very interesting development in their relationship.

  The tremor in her hands still hadn’t receded when she reached for the phone after Beau left. The time had come for her to call in reinforcements.

  Tammie had been her friend forever. They’d been pals since first grade. No matter when she called Tammie, they could have a conversation like they’d seen each other yesterday. That was a sign of true friendship.

  “Hey, girlfriend!”

  Tammie answered the phone with her usual exuberance. The blue-eyed redhead always had a big smile and a quick joke whenever Aurora needed it.

  “Hey.”

  After chatting for a minute, Aurora finally admitted her reason for calling.

  “I have a problem, and I need to talk. Do you have time to listen and offer some advice?”

  “Oh, absolutely. Is this an I-need-popcorn kind of chat, or an I-need-booze-and-ice cream talk?”

  “I’m thinking it’s somewhere in the middle.” It wasn’t that bad, but it wasn’t that good either. “Can you meet me at the coffee shop?”

  “Sure. Be there in twenty minutes...”

  After settling in at the coffee shop with their choice of beverages, Tammie got the conversation rolling.

  “Okay, shoot. What’s going on? You sounded stressed out on the phone.”

  Aurora blew out a breath, took another one, and then filled her friend in on the dilemma of Beau and their mutual attraction.

  “I don’t want to start something if I’m only going to leave here and go back to Virginia, but I don’t want to go back to Virginia if I’ve started something here!”

  How convoluted was that? Of course hearing the words out loud made things sound way worse than in her head.

  “You sound very confused about it.”

  Tammie always got to the heart of a situation quickly. That was what made her a great friend and an awesome therapist.

  “I am. I can’t believe it. I’m usually the levelheaded one and you’re the wild child.”

  “Oh, really?” Tammie’s delicate brows rose at that statement.

  “Yes, really. Like you don’t remember.”

  Aurora relaxed as she reminded her friend of how many times she’d come home intoxicated or taken a horseback ride through town at midnight. Naked.

  “I guess you’re right. But in all of my adventures what I gained was perspective.”

  “It’s that perspective I need now.”

  Seriously. There was no one else she could go to.

 
; “Go for it.”

  Tammie gave the simple advice and sipped her green tea.

  “What do you mean?” Had she heard correctly? “Go for it? With Beau?”

  “I mean go for it. Everything. There’s no sense in going back to Virginia when you’ll be wondering if you gave up the chance of a lifetime here. You’ll regret it if you don’t at least try, right?” Tammie adjusted her position. “For me, I don’t want to be on my deathbed and say, ‘I wish I had...’ How about you?”

  “No. No, I don’t.” Aurora paused and thought a minute. “That’s one way to look at it. But is it too late already? I mean, will Julie be a ghost between us forever? Will he think about her every time he looks at Chloe?” Hesitation swirled in her abdomen. “Another way to look at the situation is, what if we go for it, it goes badly, and we lose our friendship? That would make me so sad.”

  Tammie placed her warm hand over Aurora’s. “You could both win, too. If you stay without at least giving it a shot you’ll both be frustrated, which can ruin a relationship in a whole other way.”

  “That’s yet another way to look at it.” She slapped her hands on the sides of her head and closed her eyes. “God! This is so hard. What do I do?”

  “Take a breath. Relax and let it go. It’s only hard if you try to control it. If you let things unfold naturally it’s much better. If you think about things too much—and you do—you’ll end up with a big, fat headache.”

  “Yeah. My special brand of self-torture.”

  She leaned back in the chair and stared at her friend as if the answers would come flooding out her mouth.

  “You really need to relax. Why don’t you take one of my yoga classes? It helps a lot.”

  “Beau mentioned yoga for my back, but it might help me with everything else, too.”

  “It’s mind-body-spirit therapy. Can’t get any more comprehensive than that.” Tammie gave a sharp nod. “Might help you get off the pain medications, too.”

  Decision made.

  “I can use all of that. Still at the community center, right?”

  The place had been built after Aurora had left for Virginia. In the center of the little town, it was a gathering place for many people and many reasons.

  “Right. Check the website for class times. I can’t keep track of all the days and times in my head.” She waved a hand, dismissing the idea.

  “Thanks, Tam. I appreciate you listening.”

  Over the years she’d had other girlfriends, but none like her old friend from home. The thought occurred to her that if she remained in Brush Valley she could see Tammie more often, too. That would be a wonderful thing.

  “So, what are you going to do?” Tammie watched Aurora with interest. “I can keep a secret.”

  “I don’t know, but I’m not going to give up...on any of it...just because it’s difficult.”

  “There you go. You came up with your own answer. When you let go of security, of things that are familiar, that’s where growth occurs. Sometimes answers.”

  “So, you’re an old sage now?”

  Those wise words coming from Tammie, who seemed not to have a care in the world, had surprised Aurora.

  “No. My yoga teacher is. I learned that from her.” Tammie sighed. “I hated that advice when I first heard it, but now I know it’s the truth. You just have to find a way to let go of the old and embrace the new. Drop what no longer serves you.”

  “Great. Right now I don’t know what’s old and what’s new, and if I let go of anything I’m just hoping there’s a net when I fall.”

  Tammie leaned forward, her eyes intense and looking wise beyond her years. “You have to trust that you don’t need a net. That’s the key.”

  “How do I know that?” Panic flashed through her at the thought of not having a new stronghold before leaving the old one.

  “There’s only one way to find out, right?”

  “By letting go? Completely? But it’s so scary. I hate being scared.”

  Right now her heart was going on a marathon race in her chest.

  “Life is scary, my friend.”

  “I thought you were supposed to be giving me support and telling me lies, saying that everything is going to be okay.”

  “Everything is going to be okay. It just may not be in the way you imagine it right now. That’s no lie.”

  “I still have a life to get back to in Virginia.”

  Didn’t she? Wasn’t that where she belonged?

  “Isn’t that what I worked so hard to find? If I stay here, doesn’t that mean I’ve given up on my dreams?”

  “Says who?” Tammie leaned back in her chair, cradling her cup of green tea. “What makes you think your life is in Virginia any longer?”

  “Are you serious?” Aurora’s eyes popped wide. “I had a job in Virginia, I had a life there until a car crash took it all away from me. I want that life back.” A cramp tugged at her heart. “Don’t I...?”

  “Listen to yourself. You had those things. Had. Perhaps the universe is telling you that you need a different life now, and it took the crash to kick you out of what you thought you needed.” Tammie nodded. “You learned what you needed to learn there, and now it’s time to move on.”

  “That crash almost killed me.” The words were a whisper coming from her soul and tears clouded her vision. “I can’t give up, Tammie. I can’t.”

  “It’s not giving up. It’s redefining what you want out of life. There’s no shame in that. Some lessons are harder than others. Sometimes we don’t listen to the signs until something this traumatic happens. This was a wake-up call and you need to listen.”

  “How do I know I’m not making a royal mistake by not returning to my old life?”

  “You can’t return to your old life.”

  “What?” Startled, Aurora widened her eyes.

  “It’s gone—and I’m wondering if that old Aurora, so determined to not need anyone, is gone too.”

  Before Aurora could protest, Tammie held up a hand.

  “Think about it. Think about what you really want in life. Do you want marriage, a family, friends and a community, or do you want independence, to have work be your life?”

  “Can’t be both, can it?” Aurora’s shoulders dropped. Those were straight, honest words and it was a concept she hadn’t considered before.

  “Not usually. We can’t have it all. We have to pick the things that work the best and leave the rest behind.” She shrugged and her silk shawl slid from her shoulder. “Besides, do you really want it all? Having it all comes with a lot of responsibilities.”

  “I suppose so.”

  Her friends in Virginia had come from a variety of places, but the one thing they’d all had in common was that they were driven. Was that her anymore? Did she want a simpler life now?

  An image of Chloe popped into her mind. She was such a beautiful baby, with her green eyes and blonde hair so like her father’s, and Aurora already wanted to be around her more. Maybe one day have a child of her own.

  “Just think about it—see how things go. Maybe write down the pros and cons of each. Seeing it on paper might help.”

  “I’ll try it.”

  Tammie half closed her eyelids and appeared to be listening to something other than Aurora’s voice. Maybe she was listening to the universe.

  “Tammie?”

  “Yes, sorry.” She leaned forward across the table and took both of Aurora’s hands in hers. “You go get ’em. Listen to your instincts and your heart. They can’t both be wrong at the same time, right? Call if you need me.”

  “Are you going to be around this weekend?”

  Without answering right away, Tammie tilted her head to the side and gave an enigmatic smile. She could be a redheaded Mona Lisa.

  �
�Uncertain. I have a date with an artist in Pittsburgh on Friday. The weekend could go anywhere after that.”

  “You go, girl!”

  Aurora laughed and some of the tension lifted. They chatted for a while longer over another cup, parting ways with a hug and an agreement to meet the next week.

  After talking to Tammie she felt better. Sharing her burden, her fears and anxieties had helped. Reconnecting with an old friend had helped, too. Not trying to keep everything tied up inside made her feel lighter in the chest.

  The drive back to her little apartment took her past the road leading to her mother’s house, but she kept going. Right now there wasn’t enough time to have a visit. Maybe tomorrow she would stop. With her mother, there was never a short phone call or a short visit.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  SEVERAL BUSY WEEKS passed at the clinic, with a flurry of people coming in for school checkups, and sports physicals, and a variety of the ailments that were the lifeblood of Beau’s office. The appointments calendar was getting fuller every day, making Beau very happy. And working with Aurora was the icing on the cake.

  “Seems like word is getting out about the clinic. It must be the perfect location. People drive by and realize it’s here.”

  That was proof, as far as he was concerned, of the good choice he’d made in location.

  Aurora chewed her lip and a worried look came into her eyes. “I may have dropped some informational fliers at the community center.”

  “May have? You don’t know?”

  Hmm...

  “Well, yes... I do know.” She cringed.

  “So, did you or didn’t you?”

  “I did. I’m sorry. I signed up for Tammie’s yoga class and thought while I was there I’d see if they had room to promote local businesses, and they did.”

  “That’s great.” He definitely approved of the way her mind worked.

  “And the library and the post office, too.”

  “Seriously?” Dumbfounded, he stared at her.

  “That’s where people around here can be found. And in the fire hall, too. Ooh! I hadn’t thought of that one. Let me put it on my list.”