The Seaside Hotel

by Agnès Ruiz

“Well, Joanna, if I’m here, it’s to congratulate you first of all.”

  “Congratulate me, really?” Joanna repeated, sceptical.

  “Of course; for your brave decision.”

  “Thank you. You could have just called me.”

  “You can be really bad-tempered when you want. You weren’t like that before.”

  Joanna wanted to ask when she was talking about. When she was little? She preferred to avoid it. She wasn’t in the mood and was even more tired. She would go back to bed in a while. She couldn’t do that to her mother... well, it was her mother, though.

  “I haven’t slept much”, she justified, simply.

  “Yes, it happens to us all. Well, I’m not going to beat around the bush, Joanna. First of all, and I repeat, I’m very happy with your decision. If it really is your choice, of course.”

  Joanna remained dubious of her mother’s words. She wanted to answer, but Lorelli imposed silence and continued as she was on a roll.

  “I’m saying that because I want to be sure, my dear. Sure that you’ve made the decision because you really wanted it and not just on a whim, being sick and tired of it all... Incidentally, it would be strongly justified anyway.”

  “Yes, Mum.”

  74

  Lorelli hardly seemed satisfied with the short response. She squinted; examining Joanna’s sleepy face then stated her theory.

  “Is it because of what your father said that you quit?”

  Joanna frowned, trying to find what her mother implied.

  “When Dad said I was a parasite?”

  “Indeed.”

  “That other thing... is it important at the end of the day? I think it would have happened, quite simply.”

  “And you gave up fighting”, Lorelli suddenly blamed her.

  “I’m not following you. On the one hand, you came to congratulate me for handing in my resignation and on the other hand, it’s as if you regret my decision.”

  “That’s true,” recognised Lorelli without hesitating. “It’s just, you see, I have my doubts... I’m wondering if all this is my fault.”

  Joanna hiccupped in surprise at the comment. She laughed then said:

  “Mum! How could it be your fault? That’s ridiculous!”

  “Not really”, Lorelli insisted, very serious.

  “Why, Mum? What could you have done to drive me into doing something so extreme?”

  “Because I’m the one who went into your father’s office, that evening. And I told myself there was no reason for you to know that, especially if everything came from that...”

  Joanna observed her mother’s features. Was she joking? What was this absurd story? She put down her glass of water a little too forcefully, making it topple over and roll, but it stopped at the edge of the table where Lorelli caught it.

  “Be careful, Joanna.”

  “It’s only crockery. But that’s not the problem here. Are you really telling me that you went into Dad’s office? I’m not dreaming?”

  “It was me, indeed.”

  Lorelli didn’t seem particularly proud of this confession. Joanna took advantage of her long silence.

  “I must tell you that I don’t understand it anymore, Mum. Why are you blaming yourself when I know perfectly well that Marguerite is to blame?”

  “Marguerite? What has your father’s old secretary got to do with this?”

  “Mum, please, don’t do that with me!”

  “But I assure you I’m telling you the truth, Joanna.”

  “And I’m telling you that Marguerite admitted to me that she was the one who went into Dad’s office that evening.”

  Joanna told her about her visit to Marguerite and her intruding in Rodolphe G. Gaspardin’s office. She explained the episode with the torn up photos. Lorelli seemed delighted. She nonetheless realised that she didn’t know anything about it.

  “At least she witnessed his contempt. Perhaps Marguerite has more of a character than I thought.”

  As Lorelli became thoughtful, Joanna continued the conversation in hand and softly said:

  “See, Mum, you can’t say that it was you who went into his office. I know the truth.”

  “You should know that Marguerite and I both went into Rodolphe’s office, just at different times in the evening.”

  With her mother’s seriousness and insistence, this time Joanna realised that it was true. She slowly digested the information to etch it in her mind in a real way.

  “I think I’m going to go mad! Why did you do that?”

  “Listen, my darling, your father and I, are at loggerheads, you know that.”

  “It’s not a scoop, indeed.”

  “I needed money and quickly.”

  “For your restaurant, I know. But... No... Don’t tell me you wanted to ask Dad?!”

  “Are you kidding?! Never! He would laugh in my face! Or die!”

  Joanna sighed at her mother’s vehemence, no doubt excessive. Yet, she wanted to understand her motives.

  “So what? I don’t get it...”

  Lorelli seemed to balk at having to explain it now. Yet she was aware that she no longer had the choice. She had said too much. She asked her daughter to remain discreet about what she was going to reveal.

  “We kept a joint account, him and me, in case of absolute necessity, you see.”

  Joanna remained silent. Was it prudence or more an unconscious refusal to know what happened exactly? Lorelli took her silence as encouragement to continue.

  “Anyhow, the chequebook was in one of his drawers, in his desk, with an amount of money in cash, for anything unexpected” (she quickly added, as if undoing memories no sooner said than done). “Rodolphe and I are the only ones who have the key to that drawer.”

  “And you took it all, without even telling him? You didn’t!”

  “I had to, otherwise the restaurant would be taken from under my nose”, Lorelli justified herself, reasonable flustered.

  “Even if that money belongs to both of you, you shouldn’t have gone in his office like a thief. How could you have done that? Have you told him it was you now that he’s stirred up the whole hotel?”

  “Certainly not!” exclaimed Lorelli almost horrified at such a thought.

  “And you’re going to make me think that he hasn’t even realised.”

  Joanna doubted it. As long as her father had assured her that nothing was missing.

  “Was it you that went through his files? He told me, no use denying it.”

  Lorelli seemed more embarrassed, playing with her cup for a moment before facing Joanna again.

  “It’s possible that I may have had a bit of a look.”

  “Were you looking for something?”

  “Nothing in particular. I was ferreting about.”

  “I don’t believe you.”

  75

  Lorelli threw her a dark look.

  “You are just like your father: you insist and you don’t leave any stone unturned.”

  “This time I’ll take that as a compliment”, Joanna said with irony.

  “Well, if you want to know everything, I was looking for information on his fiancée. I can’t believe he’s really going to marry her just like that, for love.”

  “Why not?”

  “Don’t be on his side, now!”

  “I’m not on anybody’s side, Mum. You stole from Dad. Don’t you realise how bad that is?”

  “No, what are you saying? It’s just a loan. I’m going to pay him back.”

  “And that eases your conscience?”

  “It doesn’t stop me from sleeping”, Lorelli cut with more cheek.

  “You must tell him. And sign an acknowledgement of debt.”

  “That’s going a bit too far... Anyway, technically, it’s not theft as that money belongs to us both.”

  “But he’s the one who decided to put it in his desk. He must have doubted you’d take it for anything other than an emergency.”

  “You’re being unfair, insultin
g even, Joanna. I didn’t spend it on rubbish. It’s for a good business. My restaurant will give the seaside hotel new momentum.”

  “Fine. It’s all for the best, then. But all that has nothing to do with me; has nothing more to do with me. You haven’t forgotten I handed in my resignation and I no longer want anything to do with the hotel.”

  “On that note, nothing is going well, my darling. Everybody is panicking since you left.”

  “I’m sure Cécile will hurry and take over.”

  “For the moment, she’s conspicuous by her absence. Well, not completely”, she added very quickly before her daughter’s silent questioning. “She’s preparing her wedding, you see, so she can’t focus on the seaside hotel as much as she’d like to.”

  “It will come”, insisted Joanna, deciding not to let herself get carried away by remorse.

  “You refuse to see the reality in front of you, my little one. Your brother spends his time running around. It’s obvious he’s not the best. He complains about doing too many hours and he neglects his affairs.”

  “His affairs?” Joanna repeated, surprised. “What is he talking about? The hotel is his affair! Has he lost his mind?”

  “I’ve wondered that for a long time”, Lorelli said ironically.

  Joanna decided to continue as if she hadn’t heard anything. For all that, she hadn’t explained her brother’s behaviour. Following her train of thought, she commented:

  “On the contrary, he ought to be pleased to be able to give his enterprising spirit free reign. I’ve left him the hotel with Dad!”

  On saying that, Joanna nonetheless felt a real uneasiness. Yet she thought she’d finished with all that. It was behind her. She had made a cross over the hotel. She wanted to convince herself that it would all be fine not only for her with her decision, but also for her brother and her father.

  “I don’t know if he’s really happy... You know your brother. He disappears sometimes without warning, as if he had no obligations, no prerogatives. I don’t really know what he’s expecting with his post. Or even if he takes it seriously.”

  Joanna had asked herself the same question so often. Her mother was just as lucid. What was he to Rodolphe G. Gaspardin? When he told Joanna she was a parasite, he had included Joshua in that. Did that mean he was laughing at him, too? Joanna felt more and more uncomfortable with the situation that was even further away. She closed her eyes briefly to reassure herself and comfort herself regarding her decision.

  “Joshua’s going to pull himself together. He can be a good manager. And Dad will help him as necessary now I’m not in their way.”

  Joanna was sincere. And, in fact, she barely wanted to talk about the seaside hotel and the worries they had since her departure. She wanted to get away from all that.

  Lorelli obviously didn’t have the intention of leaving her alone.

  “Your father is doing what he can, but for now, he hardly knows any of the staff. It was you who managed that. He’s like a bull in a china shop. The proof: he reprimanded poor Sylvia, on the reception desk, because she wasn’t checking the guests in fast enough.”

  “Sylvia has always done excellent work”, Joanna argued, unhappy with what she had learnt.

  “Precisely. She does her best considering the circumstances. Especially as she wasn’t even meant to be at work. You know as well as I do.”

  “Mélanie should have been there”, Joanna conceded.

  “Tell me about it! That little thing hasn’t even deigned to show her face. If I get my hands on her, I’ll soon tell her what I think of her ways, trust me.”

  Lorelli also informed Joanna that Sylvia had left in tears.

  “I told you, it’s none of my business”, Joanna reprimanded.

  She wanted to put up a wall in front of the revelations, to protect herself, otherwise she risked reconsidering her decision. She was well aware of it.

  “Except if the hotel is about to implode, my dear.”

  “None of that has anything to do with my absence. I’m not that essential. Dad told me often enough.”

  “He must be kicking himself, today, the idiot.”

  “Why have you come to tell me that? Because your profits next year are going to suffer?”

  Joanna was tired. She wanted to put it all behind her and start with a clean slate. Could she one day?

  “Don’t be cheeky, Joanna, please. Never mind the profits. I have my business, now. Except my restaurant will do much better with the hotel in full health at its side.”

  “Ask Dad’s fiancée to take care of the hotel as well as her wedding. She must be able to take care of the staff, I saw her at work the day of Marguerite’s retirement party. She went there with her smooth voice, all smiles. A bit of flattering here and a bit there.”

  Joanna imitated her for a while, raising a graceful arm.

  Lorelli made a face.

  “What a schemer! Are you telling me that she wants to involve herself in the hotel that much?”

  “And why not, if she marries Dad? She’ll have to get involved. She can’t just make do playing tennis with Joshua.”

  The damage was done. She tried to take back her indiscretion, but Lorelli wouldn’t let go until she had told her everything she had discovered. Trapped, Joanna played for time for a while before speaking. Without waiting any further, she told her mother about the conversation she happened upon between her brother and Cécile.

  “Do you think they’ve known each other for a long time?” Lorelli asked, visibly displeased and her mind already suspicious.

  “I don’t know. But I didn’t like it.”

  “You should tell your father!” Lorelli struck.

  “I can’t get involved with this business.”

  “And if Rodolphe finds out from another source? Sparks will fly.”

  “I repeat: It is certainly not me who is going to tell him. Moreover, he wouldn’t even believe me. He gives me no credit for what I have to say. And anyway, I told you, I’m not going to set one foot in that hotel any time soon. I’m taking a well-deserved rest.”

  “Holidays only last for a time. You have to pay your rent.”

  “I haven’t forgotten. I just need some frivolity. Take some time. I’m painting.”

  Lorelli listened politely, but Joanna knew her mother was barely interested.

  “Tell me when you’re ready to go back to work.”

  “I will not return to the seaside hotel, Mum, it’s useless to insist.”

  “I know... I imagine they’ll need to find a solution.”

  “And they’ll find one. I’m not irreplaceable. Incidentally, nobody is nor should they be.”

  It was an irrevocable analysis. Lorelli still watched her as she had her hand on the door handle.

  “I would like to open my restaurant in one month”, she announced as she was already on the landing.

  “Do you think you’ll be able to make it?” Joanna worried.

  “I was wondering if maybe, you’d like to give us a hand... But if you can’t, I would understand...”

  Lorelli turned around and placed her hand on the handrail. She didn’t go down straight away.

  “I’ll see what I can do. I’m not promising you anything”, replied Joanna to her back.

  Lorelli turned around and slowly nodded, scrutinising her daughter.

  “I appreciate that, my dear, I assure you.”

  “I’ll come, Mum. Tomorrow or the day after, just a quick look, to establish a first assessment of what I can do to help you and Mrs Blo... I mean, Mrs Flaque.”

  “She’s a great woman, you know.”

  “I don’t doubt that.”

  Lorelli left briskly this time.

  76

  Joanna went back into her flat with mixed feelings. She felt that the seaside hotel wanted to hold her at all costs, even with the intervention of her mother’s restaurant.

  Would she ever be able to totally liberate herself from their grasp?

  Did she really want tha
t?

  Joanna poured herself a fresh cup of coffee before remembering that her mother had made it. She left the cup and checked her messages. There was one from her friend Linda. She had gone home an hour after her, alone she clarified. The rest of the message concerned Joanna and Guillermo. She wanted to know everything. Joanna put down her phone and went to the shower.

  “And the day has only just begun”, she complained.

  The days away from the hotel had been decidedly complicated for the moment. She realised she hadn’t seen the time pass.

  Last Monday, as her daughter Zoé got back from school, they had had a real conversation following her evening in Caen. Together, they had established an adequate punishment.

  In Joanna’s eyes, the most important thing was that her daughter understood the seriousness of the situation. The rest was of little importance.

  Her daughter was fine, she repeated, as was her friend Lilas and her sister. Joanna didn’t dare adventure above that. How many times had she had a nightmare about similar situations?

  It was already two o’clock when Joanna realised that she had nothing at all planned for her day.

  It was a strange sensation. She slid to her bedroom where she had set up the painting necessities and threw herself into a totally imaginative creation.

  She manipulated the different materials with more or less delight, unable to know how it would look with such or such paintbrush. She also used cotton and her fingers, her index finger and little finger along its length to find the effect she had in mind, but it didn’t give the result she counted on.

  In spite of everything, the painting progressed, the colours harmonised more or less. Joanna stopped to look at it altogether.

  “Nothing at all! I’m rubbish, mega-rubbish.” She announced as if the canvas confirmed her opinion.

  Joanna sighed then picked up the canvas without ceremony and threw it in the bin. She wandered into the living room, flicking on the television .

  She suddenly heard a falling sound below. Guillermo was home. She remembered that he wanted to talk. He said so the previous evening. Joanna didn’t want to whatsoever. They had nothing more to say.