The Marriage (Darkest Lies Trilogy Book 3)

by Bethany-Kris

  “What is the question?” Karine snapped.

  Soaked in anger, her words made Sylvia wince. Her tone was charged by Katina’s voice, and she closed her eyes.

  Stop it, she said silently.

  “It’s okay, Karine, you don’t have to suppress anything. It’s okay if someone else wants to come out and speak to me,” Sylvia insisted.

  Was it really?

  Karine’s nostrils flared.

  Sylvia had no idea what she was asking for. She wouldn’t want to meet Katina—no one did. Katina didn’t introduce herself to the world because she wanted to make friends. She came along to burn everything down.

  When she opened her eyes, Sylvia was still staring at her, searching her eyes for proof of a switch.

  “Is it still you, Karine?”

  “Are you still alive?” she asked back in a murmur.

  Sylvia’s brow dipped. “I beg your pardon?”

  “Yes, it’s me.”

  “Okay, that’s okay, that’s very good.”

  “What is your question?” Karine asked, doing her best to modulate her anger.

  She wasn’t going to do it—no matter how much that voice told her to lash out. It wouldn’t be what Roman wanted, and while he was the last person who deserved anything from her, he wasn’t here. She didn’t think letting her frustration explode would do her well, considering that.

  “Why did you run when you knew you wouldn’t be able to escape?” Sylvia continued.

  It was a good question.

  She had actually thought about it already.

  There was no way she would have made it out of the facility without being tackled to the ground by security before she even hit the stone wall. And yet, the moment she was out of that door, she felt the urge to make like wind, and go.

  For a second, that’s all it was. And she’d laughed, too.

  Then, it was over.

  Like everything else.

  “Because I wasn’t running from anything or going anywhere,” Karine said, meekness returning in her tone. The tears blurred her vision as she continued, whispering, “I have nowhere to go.”

  *

  When Karine woke up the next morning—for the first time since her arrival at Twin Rivers—something had changed. She couldn’t quite figure out what it was. Her first instinct was to check the ring on her finger. It was there, of course.

  She was still married to Roman.

  It wasn’t all just a dream, even though it sometimes felt like it.

  Before Sylvia knocked on her door, she had showered and dressed for the day already. There was even a rumble in her stomach.

  She didn’t remember the last time she’d been hungry—ravenous. Not since she left the lodge in Vermont.

  “What do you want to do today, Karine?” Sylvia asked. “Hopefully something less strenuous than yesterday.”

  The therapist even smiled, though it was hesitant. She stood at the door to Karine’s room, blocking it with her slender body.

  If Karine wanted to, she could have pushed past her and run out. Undoubtedly, there were guards standing close by. Waiting for any rash decision Karine might make because she wouldn’t risk another event where she might run.

  “Maybe we could go on that walk we talked about yesterday.”

  Sylvia didn’t appear as hopeful today. Who could trust Karine to make wise choices—who could trust her at all?

  Karine knew all about that.

  Who did she really trust anymore?

  She thought she trusted Masha, but did she really?

  She thought she trusted Roman, too.

  “A walk sounds perfect,” Sylvia agreed, “but I want you to know that we’ll have some security with us.”

  Karine shrugged. “I’m used to that.”

  It took the other woman a second to absorb that admission.

  “Are you?”

  “Usually, yes. I’m not sure how much money this place is going to get for keeping me here, but I’m sure you’ve figured out already that I don’t come from great people.”

  Good people.

  “Well, I know a little. Just enough, anyway,” Sylvia replied. “But it’s not really about you. There is so much about you that I’d like to know.”

  “I’m not sure there’s much you’ll like hearing about,” Karine replied.

  Sylvia’s smile had faded, but there was a softness in her eyes that made Karine think she might actually care.

  But she was one burned, twice shy, and wouldn’t be falling into that trap again.

  “I don’t make judgements, Karine. Sometimes hearing the worst about humanity is a part of my job, and you should know I am very good at it,” Sylvia said. “If only you’d give me a chance to show you.”

  Karine went to the door, and Sylvia stepped aside.

  Outside in the hallway, she was surprised to find there were no guards. She was certain they would follow them outside but for now, Sylvia had chosen to trust her. Or at least, extend a show of it for the moment.

  She glanced back over her shoulder at the woman to find Sylvia had raised her brow, a silent question hanging between the two of them—like she was asking, well, now what, Karine?

  “I don’t know what you want from me.”

  “Just to talk,” Sylvia said. “You can do that.”

  “I can’t, actually. I’ve never been able to, mostly. I don’t know if maybe I don’t want to. There’s so much ... a lot has happened, and I—”

  She couldn’t make a coherent sentence. Thoughts and feelings became one big jumbled mess at just the idea of discussing her past.

  Sylvia reached over to close the distance between them, touching Karine’s shoulder—maybe for the first time, she couldn’t honestly remember.

  It was soft, though.

  Light.

  “Your husband believes in you. He told me all about the progress you made in a short time—he knew all you needed was a chance, Karine. You don’t know how strong you are, but I know you can do this. Even if the way you do it is by taking it one day at a time.”

  Above everything, the emotional whiplash was the worst for Karine. One second she was angry at the world, the next she wanted to cry, and right then, she found herself longing for the man who’d put her here.

  Irony was a bitch.

  A cruel one.

  The women walked down the hallway side by side, and Karine wished Roman was there with her. At the same time, a part of her was glad he wasn’t.

  Like spiritual warfare, she was being ripped apart. Karine didn’t know how to stop it.

  *

  “Did he call today?” Karine asked Sylvia.

  It had been a few days since the first time they went on that walk together—a step in the right direction, Sylvia said after they had headed back to Karine’s room.

  Karine didn’t think she would be admitting as much, but she was actually beginning to feel like she could trust Sylvia. She wasn’t at the same place of trust she’d reached with Michelle or Claire, but maybe she could get there. At some point in the future, if she was still stuck here staring at the same four walls.

  So to speak.

  What option did she have?

  “No, we haven’t heard from him today,” Sylvia replied.

  Sitting in the gardens next to the small fish ponds, Karine had a paper bag with a sandwich and a banana for her lunch. Sylvia was eating a protein bar beside her on the bench. She could have opted for something tastier—crepes had been on the brunch menu—but she only wanted easy today.

  Karine had woken up that morning with the sudden urge to hear Roman’s voice. It was the first thing she asked when she laid eyes on Sylvia, and it hadn’t been far from her mind since.

  However, he didn’t call.

  When she asked Sylvia to find out why—she was told that he hadn’t called in over four days. He’d called repeatedly, several times an hour, for days. Then stopped without warning.

  Because he’d given up—was he angry?


  She didn’t know.

  It broke her heart.

  She couldn’t blame him for the silence—mostly. It wasn’t his fault. Karine didn’t feel like she deserved any better than that.

  “I’m sure he’ll call soon. Your husband sounds like a busy man,” Sylvia continued.

  Karine blinked away the hot sting of tears in the back of her eyelids. She could picture him standing right there in front of her, if she leaned over and stretched her hand out she was sure she’d be able to touch him.

  Her imagination had always been vivid.

  Far too real.

  That was part of the problem.

  “Yeah, that’s probably it,” Karine replied, shrugging as her grip tightened on the paper bag. “He’s busy—he’s got a lot of things to deal with.”

  “There you go. I’m sure he’ll call soon.”

  Karine shook her head. “Or he’s too busy to deal with me. I’m a nuisance to him, I think. I keep fighting him, I’m always in the way. I don’t even know why he married me.”

  Sylvia ate the last piece of her protein bar, then stuffed the wrapper in her jacket pocket. She gave Karine a look from the side as she said, “We talked about this already, didn’t we?” You shouldn’t doubt the positive things that happen to you because they happen for a good reason. Do you consider your husband to be a foolish man?”

  She thought about that.

  “Not usually.”

  Sylvia grin. “All men have their moments. Do you consider him to be a liar?”

  “He lied to get me here.”

  “And that’s what hurts the worst.”

  “Shouldn’t it?” Karine asked.

  Syliva hummed under her breath. “You know the circumstances that found you here—did he have another way?”

  She didn’t answer that.

  The therapist seemed fine with her silence.

  “You just have to trust him, and understand that he married you with good reason. He married you because he loves you, and it’s exactly what he wanted to do. That one thing can exist and be true outside of the other things he’s done, Karine. You can hate the sin, and love the sinner. They don’t have to be mutual or exclusive.”

  Karine didn’t add the fact that Roman may also just have married her to keep her safe from Dima—so he couldn’t claim her as his property.

  She’d rather believe Sylvia’s version instead of the poisonous doubts that constantly left Karine floating in uncertainty and pain.

  Sylvia smiled, saying quietly, “He will call. I’m sure he has a valid reason for not doing so in a few days. Give him a chance to explain it.”

  Which meant waiting.

  But for what?

  Even though Karine nodded her head, she wasn’t feeling as confident as Sylvia did. Maybe she had pushed him too far. Maybe, like her father, Roman wanted to wash his hands clean of her entirely.

  She hated the part of herself that understood why.

  *

  Nighttime was the worst.

  She used to never dream—or rather, she never remembered them come the next morning. Lately, she couldn’t escape the nightmares. Constant and vivid, they trapped her between sleeplessness and memories she didn’t want to relive.

  It was even worse when she couldn’t tell the difference between being asleep, or awake. Karine gasped for air as she peered through the crack between the door of the closet. The faint ringing in her ears deafened all other sounds.

  Katina and Dima’s voices were muffled. She couldn’t even hear her sister crying anymore or the crack of his fist when it fell against her skull for the final time.

  Katina must have slumped down to the floor, but there was a blinding white light splashed all over the bedroom.

  No, that’s not right.

  Karine hadn’t been in the bedroom.

  She blinked rapidly but still couldn’t see anything, but that was the first moment she’d come back into awareness, and left the nightmare. Not that it mattered, she still knew what happened. She had seen it so many times that she memorized every detail of the scene. Even the smell of her sister’s perfume.

  She cried out for Roman when her body jolted awake all at once. She sprang up in bed, realizing her nightclothes were damp from her own sweat and so were the sheets surrounding her.

  Where was she?

  Where was Roman?

  She shouted his name again.

  Nothing.

  No one answered her back.

  The room was dark, and she jumped out of the bed searching for a switch along the wall. Stumbling in her fear and confusion because she couldn’t remember where she’d fallen asleep. She was blind in her dream and now that she was awake—she was blind still.

  “Roman. Please.”

  Her whispers disappeared into the darkness until her fingers felt the shape of a switch. A harsh yellow light flooded the room, and that’s when she remembered where she was. Finally, Karine could breathe, but her chest was still tight.

  She stared around the sterile bedroom, realizing that the faint hope she would wake up to the hotel room had been another part of her nightmare.

  Tears filled her eyes when she realized she was alone. It’d been a long time since she last saw him, and she was starting to forget what it was like to hear his voice.

  When she searched her quiet mind, expecting Katina’s eager and commanding voice to ring through, she heard nothing.

  Karine ran to the bathroom to stare at her own reflection, finding tear-stains streaking her cheeks and droplets still hanging from her lashes. When she blinked in the mirror, the tears fell. At least, the visible color in her cheeks that had been missing from her face for days was starting to return.

  Not much else could be said for the exhausted, crying girl staring back at her in the mirror.

  “You’re always beautiful, babe. Even when you cry.”

  Karine’s eyes shifted to the reflection of Roman in the mirror. His figure stood behind hers in the doorway of the bathroom, his handsome chiseled face was set in a soft expression as he regarded her. His beard was neat and freshly cut. Even the longer part of his hair on top had been brushed into a high quiff. With his hands thrust deep in the pockets of his pants, Roman stood with his legs apart, firmly planted on the tiled floor.

  With authority and power.

  Just like she remembered him.

  Karine clutched the edge of the sink, and shut her eyes. You’re still dreaming, she told herself. It’s not real. She took in two deep breaths, slow and steady, the only thing that helped when she was starting to lose control.

  “It’s just in my head. This is not real,” she muttered out loud.

  “It’s not just in your head, Karine. Turn around and look at me.”

  His deep voice filled her soul. She opened her eyes, and stared at the mirror again. He was still there in the reflection. Standing behind her, waiting.

  Was she getting worse?

  Her dreams were turning into hallucinations, taking over her life. Fear was her constant companion. The only thing she counted on.

  Then, he came towards her, his smile growing as he reached out and touched her shoulder. She felt that—the pressure of his big hand, and thick long fingers wrapping around her before he spun her around in a flash.

  That was real.

  He was really there.

  Roman hooked a finger under her chin, leaning down until their lips nearly touched, and she felt that, too. “I’m sorry—for everything. You really thought I could stay away from you?”

  ELEVEN

  Roman was still high when Marky knocked his door down. No, literally, the asshole kicked it open when he didn’t answer.

  He hadn’t heard him knocking or his phone ringing because the music was too loud in the loft.

  The first thing Marky did was turn the music off.

  Roman was in nothing but his gym shorts, unbothered by the sight that greeted his friend. His place was a mess. He hadn’t bothered to pick up the takeout containe
rs or bottles from the night before.

  What did it matter?

  “Cut this shit out,” Marky barked at Roman. “Who plays music that fucking loud, anyway?”

  It made him laugh.

  The music was the problem?

  Hilarious.

  “You want something?” he asked Marky, throwing himself into the couch where lines of coke were neatly arranged on a broken shard of mirror.

  He couldn’t even remember how it all got there. Did he do this all himself? Because it was exactly what he was looking for.

  Pressing one nostril down, he held the mirror up to his face so he could snort with the other one through the rolled-up hundred dollar bill he’d left on the glass. Marky’s voice droned on, but it was nothing more than a buzz in his ears.

  He pinched his nose because it tingled for a few seconds—burning right before adrenaline shot through his body like his veins were on fire.

  There.

  He’d be up for another eight-hour run, at least. Who fucking needed sleep?

  He grinned at Marky.

  “Do you even see yourself, man? Why don’t you hold the mirror up and take a good look at yourself,” Marky snarled.

  His friend even dared do swipe out at the piece of glass with the remnants of powder in Roman’s hand, but coke made him faster—better. Tossing it aside, he threw his arms out on either side of him, getting comfortable again.

  “What is your problem, bro?” Roman asked, laughing even though he knew it would only piss his friend off more. He just didn’t understand why.

  Who cared if Roman destroyed his life?

  It was already gone.

  “Why are you here and why won’t you leave me alone? I don’t remember telling you to come over.” Roman looked over at the door and the damage Marky had done by making his way through, pointing at it as he said, “And shit—you better fix that door before you fucking leave.”

  “I’m not going anywhere until you answer my questions.”

  Excuse me?

  Roman cocked a brow. “I don’t have to do shit, actually.”

  “No, you don’t have to do anything, at least nothing I ask. But your father isn’t too far behind. Everyone knows something is up with you, Rome. You’ve been out of the picture for over a week, man. Your parents are asking questions, and I’m running out of excuses here.”