Matchmaker Abduction: Aliens In Kilts, Abduction 1

by Donna McDonald

  Her sigh over her weakness was loud and long. Sighing was all she could do these days. She felt more freaking helpless than she’d ever felt in her life.

  “I’m sorry. Am I taking too long?” Mia asked.

  Erin shook her head. “No, lass. Take all the time ya need. I’m sighing for my own reasons. My ma would tell ya that I’m just a sigher. Always have been.”

  Mia smiled and nodded. “My mother was a sigher too. She died when I was sixteen. My dad turned me over to placement services the day her body was officially incinerated. I modeled to support myself and the common house where I lived with thirty-three others like me. Lexi found me a year later and made me his mistress the moment I turned eighteen. There were other men in my life who I was friendly to as well. Lexi knew, but he had a wife, so he didn’t seem to mind sharing. We both liked our arrangement with each other.”

  “If life was so good, how did ya end up here?” Erin asked.

  “Lexi told me he had the kind of open marriage that allowed for outside lovers, but I found out later he didn’t. He’d just wanted that kind. His wife insisted he remove me from his life, but he really didn’t want to… and I didn’t want to leave him either.”

  Erin nodded. “A lot of men want that kind of marriage. It doesn’t surprise me that five hundred…” No, she couldn’t say that. She wasn’t supposed to mention anything about her past, but it was fecking hard to remember the details of all her lying. “What I mean is… it doesn’t surprise me that some marriages these days officially include outside relationships. I suppose I’d prefer such a thing to be out on the table rather than hidden in a cupboard. Where I come from, being with another once ya are married is called infidelity and considered a sin, but I read in books that it wasn’t like that everywhere.”

  “I know you and Angus MacNamara are a committed couple,” Mia said with a smile.

  Erin shook her head and laughed. She refused to lie about this. It would never be believable. “Angus and I have a… unique… relationship. The truth of the matter is that I’ve always preferred to keep my status as a promiscuous goddess worshipper. It’s put more than one man off making me his wife when he found out I wasn’t interested in cooking his supper for a living.”

  Mia put down the picture. “But you’re a matchmaker. You should have the perfect relationship.”

  “Perfect doesn’t exist, child.” Erin laughed and shook her head. “Don’t take my teasing wrong. I believe in love and marriage. Both are meant to support those with the right mindset for them. I’d be quick to advise ya not to go that far if ya are not interested in being true to the one ya pick. Love is one thing, but most people value loyalty in word and deed most. Sharing yer body with another after promising not to is about as disloyal as it gets, especially when the one waiting at home is thinking all turns belong to them.”

  “But don’t you think all men are unfaithful by nature?” Mia asked. “It’s always seemed like that to me.”

  Again, blasted Angus popped into her mind. Bloody hell. She had no idea if he had been faithful to his wife or not. She only knew he’d been faithful in death, even while dipping his sizable cock into her. But for all she really knew, Angus MacNamara was secretly the world’s biggest womanizer. He was over two decades older than her. She certainly hadn’t known him as a boy.

  Though she secretly agreed with Mia about most men’s morals, in her line of work she’d learned to keep her personal cynicism tucked away from the young and idealistic. Mia had the nature of those types, even if the life she’d lived to date hadn’t allowed her the luxury.

  “Some men do remain faithful… even to their dead wives,” Erin said firmly. “I have experience of that kind myself. And some men sincerely want to love and be loved in return. Those are the ones worth really having, but ya have to look damn hard for them. I understand how distracting all those muscles, wide shoulders, and a nice arse can be to a woman. My best advice though is to look into their eyes instead of at the size of their cock or purse.”

  Mia picked up the least attractive male in the pile. He was still good-looking, just not the most handsome in the group. “This one looks like he has kind eyes.”

  Erin leaned over and looked at the picture before nodding. She’d seen that one wandering around looking lost and unsure. He seemed like he’d be a careful sort with a woman. “I agree, Mia. Want me to set up a sweet meet for ya?”

  “Yes, please. I don’t think I told you, but I heard you and Angus on a recording once. You sound very different in person,” Mia said. “Your speech is charming though. I could listen to you all day.”

  The lies just piled on top of each other lately. Worse, they rolled easily off her tongue now. MacNamara with his damn ethics was going to have the devil of a time covering his big arse lies.

  “They have ways of covering yer voice failings when they record ya. The village where Angus and I first lived was very remote. We did all our learning on machines and never traveled much. It kept our language unchanged much longer than usual. Angus and I are two of the only ones left sounding like we do. Perhaps in another few hundred years the accents will finally fade and we’ll sound as common as anyone else around here.”

  She was relieved to see the girl nod. Nate had disturbing ways of making people forget their nosier questions about her. Worse, the person didn’t even remember the unpleasantness afterward. He’d already stopped some of the draftees from questioning the changes in her appearance. Maybe Nate’s lies were bigger and better than hers—she didn’t know. However, the result was the draftees just started all over again with her, accepting her for what she was when she was with them.

  “How is your life partner doing these days? We all heard he was sick and had taken medical leave.”

  “My what?” Erin asked in surprise, tripping over the term. She didn’t appreciate the girl laughing at her stumble.

  “Angus—Mr. MacNamara? Aren’t you two a long-term couple?” Mia asked.

  Erin kept forgetting that the whole world believed Angus was having himself a medical break from his duties. No one knew the original Universe 1 version was really gone. If he was with the Goddess now, she hoped Brighid took pity on the man and looked after him. The Morrigan would take his soul if the original was anywhere as bad as the version she knew.

  “You’ll have to forgive me, Mia. Angus and I got spitting mad at each other just before he took ill. I sometimes forget what the world thinks of us. But don’t lose faith in long-term love. If there wasn’t any fighting in a relationship, there wouldn’t be any making up. Ya certainly wouldn’t want to miss that kind of sex. It’s the best ever. Angus is outstanding when riled up beyond reason.”

  And that was the biggest lie she’d told yet. She had no idea what Angus was really like in bed. His one drunken poke had been blissful to her neglected girly parts, but hadn’t done a thing for the rest of her.

  While the girl was still giggling about her sex comment, Erin let a quiet sigh of relief escape. She surely hoped she was done lying today.

  The ones about her version of Angus always broke her heart.

  Chapter Four

  Angus walked back to the mirror in what some medical person had explained to him was the interim recovery area. His room was furnished like a military barracks, but what did he know? He was still trying to figure out how he’d gone from looking sixty-seven to looking thirty-five during the time he’d been sleeping his life away. He didn’t even recognize the bugger staring back at him. The amount of physical change was shocking enough to make a man swear off Guinness altogether.

  He thought of Erin and wondered where she was. She’d left him sleeping and then disappeared. No one would tell him anything about her. They just patted his arm and assured him she would return when she could.

  He also wondered what happened to his kilt. He was now wearing a pair of loose waist pants and a shirt in the same material that hung outside. They looked like night clothes, but he’d noticed the doctors all wearing something simi
lar. Maybe it was all they had for someone his size. He’d never been a small man, not even in youth. Most of his time was spent in kilts because pants were fecking uncomfortable on an arse his size.

  A knock on his door had him spinning and just as quickly his stomach dipped when he saw it wasn’t who he’d hoped to see. Though exactly why he wanted Erin O’Shea to come torture him was beyond his comprehension. Maybe it was just because they’d been kidnapped together.

  “Hello, Mr. MacNamara. I’m Nate, your primary healer. I wanted to come by and update you on your current condition.”

  “If I seem confused to see ya, it’s because I am,” Angus declared. “I was feeling just fine before ya stuck me in that fecking box. What condition are ya talking about?”

  Angus watched his doctor wrinkle up his forehead in thought. The man looked like he had gas.

  “When you came to us, you had several twentieth century diseases we learned were common to people in Universe 6. We had to research and heal each one separately, so that took a bit of time and no small amount of staff, but we were under orders to take care of everything. We of course made our typical DNA adjustment while we were working on your organ regeneration. I must say your body responded quite enthusiastically to the cellular restructuring. Most people gain back a little time, but you seem to have doubled the usual amount of change we see.”

  Angus twisted his mouth into a grimace. “How about ya speak all that a little plainer, lad?”

  He watched the doctor smile. “Sorry if I seem rude. It's just that I like the way you talk. It’s so very different from what I’m used to hearing. None of the aliens are… well, never mind. You asked for a plainer explanation. Let me think.”

  Angus watched his doctor pace and frown. His stomach clenched nervously in preparation to hear bad news.

  “While you were in the healing coma, your body reset its biological clock and what you see in the mirror is the age it chose. Everyone in Universe 1 gets their DNA reset in one-third-life, which averages between sixty and eighty-five here, but rejuvenation doesn’t usually net such incredible results as it has in your case. In a Universe 1 person’s life, the rejuvenation process can be repeated a few times, but eventually the body stops responding. The first time is usually the best. You look like one of the aliens with all those muscles. How old are you? Chronologically, I mean?”

  “Never ya mind how fecking old I am,” Angus said, wincing internally. “Where is my kilt?”

  “Your… oh… your homeland plaid. Technically, the fabric was once an animal so it probably couldn’t come through the portal without causing some problems, especially with the time difference. You’re welcome to look through the other clothing we have that might fit someone of your stature, but it’s all going to look pretty much like what you’re wearing.”

  Angus looked down at himself. The pants he wore covered his cock well enough he supposed. Wasn’t that the most important thing for a man? “Okay. Where’s Erin O’Shea hiding?”

  “Erin will be back shortly. She’s probably working with the draftees. It’s remarkable how well the woman has adjusted to being here. Unlike her predecessor, she picked up the work immediately. Erin is quite the marvel. We’re all very happy to have you and Ms. O’Shea replace your Universe 1 originals.”

  “A marvel, eh?” Angus repeated the comment, huffing at the thought. “More like a pain in someone’s arse. It’s her default setting.” The doctor looked highly disturbed at the insult. “What are ya staring at me like that for?”

  “You and Erin… you’re not… I mean, you don’t sound like you were a couple in your universe.”

  Angus rolled his eyes. “I guess that depends on what ya consider a couple. We took a run at each other once, but that didn’t exactly take. We do try not to fight like enemies in front of complete strangers. On a good day, I say she helped me match up some of my children with their spouses. Mostly I’m loyal because I still owe her for helping me with that.”

  Nate looked away. “How interesting. We all know the portal has quirks and perhaps this is one of them. I guess sometimes even the Guardians don’t get the story right. Mr. MacNamara, do I need to worry about a negative relationship between you and Erin O’Shea?”

  “What in bloody hell are ya talking about, man?” Angus demanded. “Yer tone sounds like I just announced an intention to kill her. I promise ya… I would never do that no matter how much the woman tempted me with her vile tongue. I’ll not be spending eternity in hell because of the likes of Erin O’Shea. Now I can’t promise ya I will never yell at her. Doing so would be an outright lie on my part.”

  “You two were still legendary matchmakers in Universe 6 though. I mean… weren’t you?” Nate asked.

  Angus hung his head and shook it as he studied his feet. They had put paper shoes on him. He must have been really sick to let anyone get by with doing such a thing.

  “Feck, I don’t know. Matchmaking is what they called what I did just because I matched up my children… alright, and some friends. Gods, I made one fecking promise to my Mary and now my entire reputation is ruined for all history. I had a thriving farm and sold milk to Lisdoonvarna and other towns. That’s what kept my belly full and how I raised my kids. Matchmaking didn’t pay anything but the occasional chicken or lamb.”

  Nate laughed. “I’m so terribly sorry for my amusement. Your language is wonderful. Who’s Mary?”

  “Mary’s my dead wife,” Angus said grumpily. “Hellcat and tormentor extraordinaire. Worse than Erin O’Shea, and that’s really saying something. But I’ll deny it to my death if ya tell her I said so.”

  “Wow, things were very different in Universe 6 than they were here. So are you saying Erin O’Shea is a free woman as far as you’re concerned?”

  “And if I am saying it?” Angus demanded in return, not sure why the doctor’s keen interest in Erin was starting to bother him. Maybe it was because the man had jumped on his revelations too quickly. That was probably it.

  Nate shrugged and then smiled. “Erin will have a long line of suitors when the word gets out she’s available.” He fought off the glare aimed at him with a raised hand. “Don’t worry, Mr. MacNamara. The news of your estrangement won’t come from me. You and Erin will have to make that official yourselves here in Universe 1. I’ll be keeping our conversation to myself for a while. Why would I increase my competition for her interest? I find her both beautiful and charming.”

  “I can hardly believe my own ears. Ya nearly got me thinking we’re talking about a different woman. Help me out here, Nate. What’s so great about Erin that makes ya so keen on her?”

  Nate smiled. “You’re not much like your Universe 1 alternate. However, Erin is exactly like hers. Erin’s compassionate nature when it comes to love is something very revered here in Universe 1. We’ve gotten a little away from those kind of values since we started dealing with all the alien cultures.”

  “Now I know we can’t be talking about the same person. Erin O’Shea is a mean harpy with a vicious tongue,” Angus declared.

  Nate laughed. “Maybe she is with you, but Erin’s been perfectly pleasant to me. Kind. Caring. In fact, she came every day to see you. The first time—you were still in the rejuvenation cylinder then—she sat on the floor by it and cried over you. It took us a full hour to convince her you weren’t dead or dying. But you did have the beginnings of severe gout, a couple of cancers that had started spreading, and some extensive liver damage that we reversed. There was really no choice except to put you into stasis to let your body heal itself without traumatizing you.”

  Angus snorted. He’d had the life he’d had and he wouldn’t apologize for any of it. Where he came from… men lived hard, played hard, and died hard. That was the way of things.

  And the idea of Erin O’Shea crying over him was nearly unbelievable. She’d probably just been scared to be in this loony place all alone. He’d have been worried about that as well. He just wouldn’t have blubbered about it.

  “
I suppose I’d have been upset for a couple minutes if it had been her cooking in the box. I reckon that excuses her reaction.”

  Nate laughed again and cleared his throat. “I think maybe you like Erin more than you realize, Mr. MacNamara.”

  Angus snorted. “Me like Erin O’Shea? Has hell frozen over yet? Because that’s what's going to happen the day I admit to liking that woman.”

  Nate didn’t answer, just smiled as he stepped outside the room.

  “I am Toorg.”

  The boy was agitated when he came to collect her. For once he ignored all the women, including Prudence. He gently tugged her up from her seat and motioned for her to go with him.

  Erin nodded as she just as gently pulled her arm from his grasp. “Okay, Toorg. Okay. I’m ready to go with ya now.”

  They walked down the hall rapidly and he directed her back to medical. Only this time he entered and guided her to a room where she could see an anxious Angus now pacing inside. She looked up at Toorg. He motioned to the door with his head. Drawing in a breath, she pushed it open and walked in like she had a right to do so.

  Angus turned at her entry. He looked even larger than usual in the ugly medical clothes. With a month’s growth of beard and hair that needed trimming, Angus looked like a big old bear.

  “Where the feck have ya been?” Angus demanded. “They wouldn’t let me out of here until ya came to collect me.”

  Erin walked to a chair, sat, and put her face in her hands. She started to cry. Partly because Angus was fine and she was relieved he still lived. The rest was because she was stuck in a land of fecking strangers with the most contrary human being she’d ever known.

  Angus started toward her, but got stopped by Erin’s tall, blond guard. “Move, boy,” he ordered.

  “I am Toorrrgggg,” Toorg growled, hand firmly pushing back on his chest.