The Prisoner of Snowflake Falls

by John Lekich

  You should have seen Wally Whispers behind the counter of the hardware store, talking locks and keys with the locals like he’d been doing it all his life. He even made up free keychains with the store’s logo and passed them out to one and all. One afternoon, I watched him for a while. He spent ten minutes helping Sylvia decide between a beige electrical outlet cover and a brown one. “Thank you, Ernie,” said Sylvia. “Your sense of color is a lifesaver.”

  If I didn’t know better, I would almost think that Uncle Andy and his associates were enjoying pretending to be honest businessmen. I could tell that Uncle Andy was enjoying it a bit too much. It all started with the Welcome to Snowflake Falls Committee. The head of the committee was none other than Ms. Penelope Pendergast, who took an immediate liking to Mr. Andrew Tait.

  Soon I began to hear rumors that they were dating. Then I noticed that Ms. Pendergast was starting to knit a red sweater. Red just happens to be my uncle’s favorite color.

  I asked Wally about it in private, and he got very serious. “I have never seen your uncle so smitten,” he said. “It is like Cupid has hit him over the head with a giant sledgehammer.”

  I began to see Uncle Andy and Ms. Pendergast walking around town as if they were on the longest date in the history of Snowflake Falls. At first, I wasn’t too concerned. But then I saw the two of them coming out of the movies, holding hands.

  I was so shocked that I went to see my uncle at the hardware store the next day. He took me into the stockroom for a private conversation. “I saw you holding hands with my school counselor last night,” I said. “Right in the middle of a public street.”

  Uncle Andy blushed. “We were coming out of this horror movie about a giant bug,” he said. “She was just a little scared, that’s all.”

  “I am very fond of Ms. Pendergast,” I pointed out. “She bakes me fresh muffins five days a week.”

  “She talks about you all the time,” said Uncle Andy. “And she doesn’t even know we’re related.” He gave me a lovesick grin before adding, “Penelope is very dedicated to keeping you on the straight and narrow.”

  “Your relationship is becoming the talk of Snowflake Falls,” I said. “There are all sorts of rumors flying around.”

  “What kind of rumors?”

  “That you and Ms. Pendergast are going to make your own raspberry jam and enter it in the homemade jam contest at the Pumpkin Festival,” I said. “Mrs. Halpern says this means you’re practically pre-engaged.”

  “Pre-engaged?” said my uncle. “Just because we both like preserves?”

  “I’m worried, Uncle Andy. Wally says you’re smitten.”

  “Don’t be concerned, Henry. Andrew Tait may be smitten to the core. But Andy Holloway is all business.”

  Wally and Cookie weren’t so sure about Uncle Andy’s state of mind. “This town can cast a very strange spell over a normally coldhearted individual,” Cookie said. “Have you noticed that everyone is always waving at you, even when you don’t wave back? I find this highly unnatural.” I told Cookie to just return the wave and try to blend in. Pretty soon he was waving at one and all.

  I watched as Cookie, Wally and Uncle Andy became die-hard Snowflakes. When preparations for the Pumpkin Festival began in October, they pitched right in. On the actual weekend of the festival, Cookie and Wally won the senior division of the three-legged race. And Uncle Andy outbid everyone for Mr. McHugh’s prizewinning tomato, which was practically the size of a grapefruit.

  They went on every ride and played every game there was. They brought four kinds of fresh-squeezed lemonade between them and shook hands with just about everyone in town. At one point, Wally asked if the man making animal shapes out of balloons wanted to take a little break. After that, he took right over and started to make what turned out to be a fairly decent balloon giraffe.

  When Uncle Andy discovered that Ms. Pendergast was selling her homemade baked goods to raise money for the school band, he bought thirty-six blueberry muffins. I went up to him and whispered, “Have you forgotten that you’re allergic to blueberries?” All he did was smile and say, “Would you like a muffin, Henry?”

  All in all, you would have never guessed that these three individuals were planning a robbery of any kind. But then, it’s funny how fast a career prisoner can get used to a place that doesn’t have bars on the windows. Even though the hardware store was just a front, Uncle Andy developed an instant dislike for Biggie’s Bargin Barn. “How is the little guy supposed to make a living in this town?” he asked, when he discovered that some people were buying their new locks at Biggie’s.

  “It is only our personal good fortune that we have dishonesty to fall back on,” added Wally.

  Cookie started to say that Biggie’s was actually a very cheerful place. In fact, he was thinking of continuing to work there part-time. But Uncle Andy insisted that Cookie quit his job as a greeter at Biggie’s if he was going to work at the hardware store. “There goes the least objectionable honest work I ever had,” said Cookie.

  Even Oscar could not resist the lure of Biggie’s. One night at dinner, he kept looking around at everybody like some wheels were turning around in his little head. Finally, he opened his mouth to say his first whole sentence ever. “I like Biggie’s!” he shouted.

  Naturally, a grinning Oscar was expecting attention and approval. But there was only silence. Mr. Wingate, who had just gone over his store accounts that afternoon, turned very pale. “Excuse me, everyone,” he said very formally. “I believe I’m going to lie down in the living room.”

  Theodora could not believe what she was hearing. “In the living room?” she asked.

  Harrison nodded. “I do not wish to be disturbed,” he said. Once Mr. Wingate had wandered off to lie down on the living-room couch, Charlotte spoke up.

  “Can I be the one to wash out Oscar’s mouth with soap?” she asked.

  “Don’t be silly, Charlotte,” said Theodora. Then she kissed Oscar on the cheek and headed for the living room to check on Mr. Wingate.

  “Oscar gets away with murder,” grumbled Charlotte. She marched off in a huff, leaving me alone with Oscar, whose mouth was hanging open in puzzlement.

  “Way to go,” I said. “Your first whole sentence!”

  Oscar shot me a grateful grin. “I like Biggie’s!” he repeated.

  The next day, I moved into the finished guest room at the Wingates. Mind you, I would have to keep my door closed since Oscar had finally graduated from his supercrib to a small bed without bars. I discovered that if I left the bedroom door open, he would wander in whenever he felt like it. But so what? I was still deliriously happy. At least at first.

  Maybe it was all the silence that came with not having to listen to Oscar’s constant snoring. There was nothing to distract me from wondering what everyone in Snowflake Falls would think of me once my uncle and his associates pulled off the big robbery. Of course, all of us would be on our way to Arizona by then. But I knew it wouldn’t take long before they figured out I’d betrayed them all.

  I guess maybe because I was feeling a little guilty, I lost my temper with Harley Howard. I had just finished reading him a poem by Robert Frost called “The Road Not Taken.” It was all about this person reflecting on the choices he had made in life and whether he went down the right path.

  It was the kind of poem that made you think. Exactly what I was doing when Harley Howard blew a stream of smoke in my face. After that, I really lost it. I started to tell him how my mother died of cancer and how I hated breathing in all his toxic cigar smoke. “Why didn’t you say so?” said Harley, who immediately stubbed out his cigar. “What am I supposed to be? A mind reader?”

  The old man was being quite reasonable, all things considered, but I was all wound up because of the cigar smoke and his superior attitude and the way he was always bragging about what a great security system he had. I couldn’t take it anymore.

  I knew that what I was about to do could really complicate Uncle Andy’s plan for a
smooth and easy robbery of Harley Howard’s mansion. On the other hand, I just couldn’t help myself. “I know your security code,” I said. “I can stop your alarm from going off any time I want.”

  “Bullcrap,” said Harley.

  “How about if we do a little test right now?” I asked. “Two tries and I’ll crack the code.”

  “One try,” said Harley. “That’s all you get. And when the alarm goes off, you can head straight for the toilet brush.”

  “If I win, I get a favor right? Any favor I want?”

  “That’s what I said, didn’t I? I’m a lot of things, kid, but Harley Howard is no welcher.”

  The two of us went to the wall by the front door where the code panel was. Harley was looking very smug while activating his alarm system. “I’m going to enjoy this,” he said. “I think I’ll make you wear a frilly apron while you dust.”

  I got a little slip of paper out of my wallet and stared at it for a few seconds. I had two possible choices. And, if I made the wrong one, I’d be polishing Harley Howard’s silverware until every last speck of tarnish was gone.

  “What’s the matter, kid?” said Harley. “Losing your nerve?”

  I took a deep breath and made my choice. I could feel a trickle of sweat running down my forehead as I punched in the series of numbers. When I was done, there was no alarm. Only the sweet sound of silence.

  Harley Howard was so shocked that he had to sit down. After a while, he said, “How did you do that?”

  “All it took was a little research at the library,” I said. “When it comes to security codes, most people use their birthdays.”

  “Keep talking,” said Harley.

  “I came across your birthday in an old copy of the Flurry,” I explained. “That’s where I found your wife’s birthday too. I almost tried your birthday first. But I changed my mind.”

  “What made you change it?”

  “All the pictures, I guess. I mean, you looked so happy together. You try to hide it. But I can tell how much you miss her.”

  After that, Harley was quiet for a while. Like he was lost in his own thoughts. Then he said, “Well, you got me. What favor can I do for you?”

  “I want you to attend the holiday sing-along.”

  “Of all the favors you could ask for, why would you ask for that?”

  “I have my reasons.”

  Harley thought for a while. “Okay, a bet’s a bet. But I’m not going alone. You’re coming with me.”

  “Why would you want to go with me?”

  “Let’s just say I have my reasons too.”

  Then Harley Howard got all quiet again. He got so quiet that I couldn’t stand it. “Do you want me to read to you?” I asked.

  “No,” he said. “I feel like listening to some music for a while. There’s a Sinatra record on the top of that stack. Put it on, will you?”

  “I thought you said never to touch your record collection.”

  “Never mind what I said, Henry. Just do it,” he said. “Keep the volume down low.” Then he added, “Please.”

  I put the Sinatra record on the stereo and then put the old-fashioned needle on the old-fashioned record to hear it play. It was this song about being lonely in the middle of the night. When there was nobody else around to talk to or just be with. I’d never heard it before. But it kind of felt like I had.

  I was about to leave when Harley said, “See you at the usual time on Wednesday.”

  “You want me to come back after all this?” I asked. “You’re going to have to get a new alarm code and everything.”

  “Why?” asked Harley. “Are you planning on robbing me?”

  “No,” I said, trying to sound as convincing as possible.

  “So there’s no reason I shouldn’t trust you, right?”

  “Since you put it that way…”

  “That’s the way I’m putting it.” And then, much to my surprise, he offered me a genuine smile. “I’ll say one thing,” he added. “Life around you is never boring.” I was making my way toward the door when he spoke to me again. “Sorry about your mother,” he said. I told him thank you. And then there was nothing but the sound of the record until I was too far away to hear it anymore.

  I was reasonably sure Harley wouldn’t change his alarm code, which would make things a lot easier for Uncle Andy and the guys. But if Harley’s attitude was a bit unexpected, I was in for an even bigger surprise.

  It all started a few days later when George officially put me on the midnight drive-thru shift on the weekends. George asked me if I could keep a secret. “Absolutely not,” I replied.

  “I’m serious, Henry,” said George. “Nobody can know about what you’re going to see on the graveyard shift except the three of us.”

  Before I could ask what George meant, Mr. Wingate came walking through the rear entrance in a long coat. “What are you doing here?” I asked.

  “I work here,” said Mr. Wingate, who took off his coat to reveal the full Top Kow uniform in all its bovine glory.

  “What’s going on?” I said.

  “Harry will explain,” said George. “I have work to do.”

  After George went back to his office, I said, “Harry?”

  “He likes to call me that at work,” said Mr. Wingate. “It’s the least I can do.” He reached under the counter and put on his official Top Kow cap. “George hired me with no fast-food experience whatsoever.” I guess I was too shocked at the sight of Harrison Wingate in Top Kow horns to say much of anything for a while. Then out of nowhere, Mr. Wingate said, “It takes a very smart guy to hot-wire a truck like the Devil’s Dumpster.”

  “It’s a lot easier than most people think,” I said.

  “It’s not that easy,” observed Mr. Wingate.

  “No offense,” I said, “but how would you know?”

  “Can you keep a secret?” he asked.

  “Why does everybody in this town keep asking me that?”

  Mr. Wingate gave a little laugh. Then he got very serious. “I used to steal cars,” he said. “Just joyriding, mostly. I was desperate to impress Theodora back then.”

  “You stole that convertible she keeps talking about?” I exclaimed.

  “Theodora never knew it was stolen,” he explained. “After a while, she started dating some other guy. But I kept stealing cars.”

  “What happened?”

  “I was sent to a juvenile facility,” he said. “I met some counselors there who really turned me around. That’s how I got back with Theodora. And that’s why I became involved with the Second Chance program.”

  “I can’t believe you were ever dishonest,” I said as he got out the frozen hamburger patties. “You must need the extra money bad to be working here at this hour.”

  “You know that five-minute shopping spree for the person who draws the winning ticket?” said Mr. Wingate. “With promotion, merchandise and other expenses, it’s going to cost us just about everything we’ve managed to save.”

  To tell you the truth, I was excited about the prospect of grabbing at merchandise without being sent to jail. I guess Mr. Wingate could tell what I was thinking. Because right away he told me I wasn’t eligible. “For one thing, you’re a minor,” he pointed out. “And for another, you’re kind of like family.”

  I asked him why the prize was so extravagant. “You have to think big for this to work,” he explained. “Besides, if I’m going to go bankrupt anyway, I might as well have a little fun.”

  “Does Mrs. Wingate know you’re working here?”

  Mr. Wingate shook his head. “She’s a very sound sleeper,” he said. “And she’s usually out like a light by the time Oscar gets through with her.” Mr. Wingate smiled affectionately, as if he knew he was lucky to have a wife like Theodora. “She’s woken up a couple of times to find me gone. But I just told her I like to go for walks at night sometimes. You know, for the stress.”

  Then Mr. Wingate told me that if he had to shut down the store, he would probably have t
o take some sort of job at Biggie’s.

  “You really like this town, don’t you?” I asked.

  “It’s my home, Henry.”

  “I just don’t understand why everybody has to make a big deal about vegetable-growing competitions and sing-alongs.”

  “I noticed you ate your share of cotton candy at the Pumpkin Festival,” said Mr. Wingate. “I also noticed that you bought a jar of raspberry jam from Ms. Pendergast and Mr. Tait. That was very nice of you, Henry.”

  “Well, I got a little caught up in Mr. Tait’s enthusiasm when he won third prize,” I said. “I’ve never seen a person so happy with taking third place.”

  Mr. Wingate smiled at me. “People in small towns are different,” he explained. “You’d be surprised at the things they can get excited about.” Mr. Wingate grinned. For the first time I could see a mischievous gleam in his eye behind the thick glasses. All of a sudden, it wasn’t so hard to imagine him stealing cars.

  “You’re different here than you are at home,” I said.

  “In what way?” he asked. When I hesitated, he said, “Let’s you and me be just a couple of co-workers right now, okay?”

  I nodded. “I don’t know,” I said. “You seem more, you know, human.”

  Mr. Wingate looked down at his speckled cow vest so that I could see the tips of his Top Kow horns. “It must be the uniform,” he said. Then he looked up and said, “I’ve been meaning to thank you for being so nice to Charlotte, Henry. It means a lot. To her and to me.”

  He cleared his throat. “I know it wasn’t right for you to steal that truck,” he said. “But I was very proud of you for standing up and taking your medicine like that. We all were.” I could tell Mr. Wingate really meant what he said. In his uniform he looked like a very emotional cow.

  Just then, we could hear someone placing a drive-thru order. Harrison Wingate went over to the speaker and happily repeated the customer’s request. “Two TK Frosties?” he said. “Of course, sir. Do you want sprinkles with that?”